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Old 05-12-2004, 04:23 PM   #324
Chronically painful
 
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Las Vegas, NV
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EMRaiden
If you're feeling sad and blue...

don't pick up a #2 pencil, put it in your left nostril and jam it in as far as it will go...

Be glad that it was very sharp though, because it will pierce the base of your skull, dissect through your midbrain, and elevate a major vessel without causing any damage.

[Neurosurgery borrowed a pair of Vise Grips (c) and yanked it out, he walked out 1 week later completely fine.]
Your patient base must be more "cerebral" than that of FoughtFyr. I'm still cracking up about that bit he posted (paraphrasing) "The prison must be required to have at least one guy who jams pencils into his urethra."

And no you cna never kill these guys. I had this one guy brought in as a trauma arrest and he was dead. He was a piece of work, tats, tracks, bullet and lap scars. He had been hit in the head by another fine citizen with a board. I refused to believe that he was dead. You just can't kill those guys with a board. Maybe a tank....
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