Fleas and other glowing nicknames

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Originally Posted by Kimberli Cox

Since we convinced the Starbucks in hospital to open at 0600 and take our meal cards, the number of coffee cups on rounds has expanded exponentially!

Hey there,
Do you guys line up your cups on the rails outside the patient's room when you go in to examine the patient? When I was an intern, that was the way I could find the group if I broke off to check something in the computer. There would be a line of coffee cups on the rail outside the room where rounds were taking place in the morning and in the evening.

njbmd

Originally Posted by njbmd

Hey there,
Do you guys line up your cups on the rails outside the patient's room when you go in to examine the patient? When I was an intern, that was the way I could find the group if I broke off to check something in the computer. There would be a line of coffee cups on the rail outside the room where rounds were taking place in the morning and in the evening.

njbmd

Hah! We used to but they must have replaced the rails because the cups no longer fit. Now we line them up on the floor beside the room, on the COW (computer on wheels) or some rooms have a pull out shelf to put charts on. It is a good way to find the group!

I always liked the jokes about hiding money, but I only remember a couple of them.

How do you hide money from an Orthopod?
Put it in a book

How do you hide money from an internist?
Put it under a dressing.

How do you hide money from a general surgeon?
Put it in the patient's room.

How do you hide money from a plastic surgeon?
You can't hide money from a plastic surgeon.

Originally Posted by Doc Oc

I always liked the jokes about hiding money, but I only remember a couple of them.

How do you hide money from an Orthopod?
Put it in a book

How do you hide money from an internist?
Put it under a dressing.

How do you hide money from a general surgeon?
Put it in the patient's room.

How do you hide money from a plastic surgeon?
You can't hide money from a plastic surgeon.

How do you hide money from a neurosurgeon (or CT surgeon, your pick)?
Stick it to his kid's forehead.

Originally Posted by njbmd

Hey there,
Do you guys line up your cups on the rails outside the patient's room when you go in to examine the patient? When I was an intern, that was the way I could find the group if I broke off to check something in the computer. There would be a line of coffee cups on the rail outside the room where rounds were taking place in the morning and in the evening.

njbmd

When I was a 3rd year med student, we were rounding one morning when a team we consulted walked up. The attending looked at me and handed me his coffee. It was less than half full so I immediately dropped it in the trash can I was standing next to. He gave me the weirdest look for a few seconds, and I just stared back at him like "what?" Another med student clued me in later that he meant for me to hold his coffee while he looked through our patient's chart. Prick got what he deserved I guess.

How can you hide a $100 bill from a radiologist
You can't.

Originally Posted by toofache32

When I was a 3rd year med student, we were rounding one morning when a team we consulted walked up. The attending looked at me and handed me his coffee. It was less than half full so I immediately dropped it in the trash can I was standing next to. He gave me the weirdest look for a few seconds, and I just stared back at him like "what?" Another med student clued me in later that he meant for me to hold his coffee while he looked through our patient's chart. Prick got what he deserved I guess.

I so wish that I was the owner of that story.
It is too bad it was "unintentional"...but, but the attending didn't know that! I think you can claim some fancy English term like intentional fallacy for that (English major needed to correct a likely error here). I recommend you do in the future.

Fleas are annoying creatures that buzz around the floors in large groups and accomplish little. They also tend to be rather excitable creatures.

How much resemblance these creatures bear to internists is for the reader to determine.

Originally Posted by Dunce

Can anyone explain where the term "fleas" came from?

Also, feel free to post more nicknames for the other specialties. I'm sure there might be some good ones out there that some of us have not heard yet, and this board could use a good thread with an inherent lack of seriousness.

This is what I heard when on my surgery rotations about what FLEA means. Don't get mad at me, I am just answering a question. I have nothing against most of my IM colleagues, as well as my own wife who is IM/Peds trained...

F: F#$king
L: Lowlife
E: Esoteric
A: *****holes

Again, I didn't make this up, but I did hear this on several different surgery rotations....Geez, all these disclaimers, pretty sad, huh?
Mark

The Orthopods are some of the smartest docs in the hospital. They do what they want to do and they play dumb if their patient has a medical problem and the Medicine folks will come in and "save the patient" from them.

How great is that? They don't have to deal with anything they don't want to and they get other services to do their dirty work.

Originally Posted by Mman

The Orthopods are some of the smartest docs in the hospital. They do what they want to do and they play dumb if their patient has a medical problem and the Medicine folks will come in and "save the patient" from them.

How great is that? They don't have to deal with anything they don't want to and they get other services to do their dirty work.

haha thats true. If i was orthopedic I would go along with what everyone says too, do my fun job of bone stuff then leave the tweaking to IM.

The ortho residents at my hospital say that these are their ABCs:
Airway
Bone
Consult

APRS - (US) Acute Puerto Rican syndrome (bouts of screaming and yelling)

ROTFL

Three more that I have to add are:
How do you hide $100 from a gynocologist---put it above the waist
How do you hide $100 from a radiologist---put it on the patient
How do you hide $100 from a surgeon---put it in the chart

Also, my favorite abbreviation from Gen Surg is PSFD, AROBF (Patient stable from door, await return of bowel function).

Originally Posted by f_w

How can you hide a $100 bill from a radiologist
You can't.

Sure you can--- just tape it to the patient (thats another joke I heard)

Originally Posted by dawg44

heart = pre-osseous pump

I love that one. I've also heard

"pre-osseus Ancef pump"

Originally Posted by Casey James

ABC's of surgery

Assess, blame, criticize, deny, evade.

haha, that's a good one!

a couple more...

urologists- cock docs
anesthesiologists- gas passers
foley cath- 1 point restraint

Originally Posted by DropkickMurphy

Goat Rodeo - Emergency scene which goes badly (resembles a bunch of people riding or wrestling goats)
HAIRY PSALMS - Haven't Any Idea Regarding Your Patient, Send A Lot More Serum
CFT - chronic food toxicity i.e. obese

heh heh. I think HAIRY PSALMS is my fave.

Allow me to add:

ART-Achieving Room Temperature

RTDD-Refer To Dr Deere-for when the large animal pt should be euthanized (obviously an animal pt lol)yet the O insists on *saving* Fluffy.

PLH- Pray Long and Hard

TTJ-Transfer To Jesus (ie, we've tried PLH, things aren't going well, it's time to RTDD and TTJ)

TSTOP-Too Stupid To Own Pet. Self explainatory Goes along with

DSTO-Dog Smarter Than Owner

UNIVAC-Unusually Nasty Infection, Vultures Are Circling

WINDOW-Client is a "pane"

HVP-High Vulture Potential

SBD-Some Bad Disease

TSHL-The Spaceship Has Landed (usually in your exam room)

Last time I broke my ankle my orthopod asked what I did for work as I came in for one of my preop visits in scrubs-got to talking, he found out I worked for a veterinary orthopod- and told me this:

"You know, to be an orthopedic surgeon you have to be strong as an ox. And twice as smart!"

I am shocked there is not more bashing or terms out there for psych! I hear nothing but crap about pscy but surprisingly little of these terms are being thrown out for psych-now I would venture out and say all fields have found the light and respected pscyh but I kNOW that aint happening!

Originally Posted by Analyzethis

I am shocked there is not more bashing or terms out there for psych! I hear nothing but crap about pscy but surprisingly little of these terms are being thrown out for psych-now I would venture out and say all fields have found the light and respected pscyh but I kNOW that aint happening!

Psych=Whackitron

On my ortho rotation now...

The signout list for the day had, next to the entry for the histrionic kid who is always screaming for pain meds, the cryptic notation "BALLS TO BEDSIDE".

Made me laugh every time I walked past his room....

Stream Team = Urology Dept

Originally Posted by Goose-d

Rod squad?

Also "Wang Gang" and "Cock Doc"...

Originally Posted by toxic-megacolon

Stream Team = Urology Dept




Also "Wang Gang" and "Cock Doc"...

Boy, I wonder what's the slang for Ob/Gyn?

I had heard of the deli, but are we really called vultures behind our back...man.

As far what they call OB/GYN-- Team Estrogen, fans of Grey's Anatomy have heard Vagina Squad and Gyne Brigade. I of course don't use those terms...

In Path we are the step children of medicine...running on top of each other in the basement with no pot to pi** in and no window to throw it out of...speaking of windows, why can't we have a view?

First thing they teach the Ortho residents where I am is the 3530 pager for the on call medicine consult service. Awesome!


We had a similiar histrionic orthopedic male patient I was cross covering the other night. My sign out was "Ob-gyn consult pending"... Great!

I have to admit to signing out a MICU patient who I admitted on my last day of service (and who the attending said he had no idea what was wrong with) with the diagnosis of "sickas****atosis." The intern who took over the service didn't get it for a couple of days but we're tight now...since she fixed him.

BE

Is it just here or are the numbers 1700 and 1800 always tied to radiology?

Originally Posted by Venus21pam

ROTFL

I've also heard "Hispanicus Hystericus".

Originally Posted by Billy Shears

I've also heard "Hispanicus Hystericus".

and "Status Hispanicus"

F.L.E.A. = f*cking little esoteric *sshole

Bone heads=Orthos
Among Cardiologists: Plumbers (IR,) and Electricians (EPs)

Originally Posted by njbmd

Hey there,
Do you guys line up your cups on the rails outside the patient's room when you go in to examine the patient? When I was an intern, that was the way I could find the group if I broke off to check something in the computer. There would be a line of coffee cups on the rail outside the room where rounds were taking place in the morning and in the evening.

njbmd

Yup, we all line up our styrofoam coffee cups on the wooden rails here...they barely fit, so they have to "lean" against the wall.

Originally Posted by therolandoman

F.L.E.A. = f*cking little esoteric *sshole

Dude, when you bump up a 4 year old thread, you need to say "bumping up an old thread" so subsequent people don't waste time responding to folks who may no longer be on SDN. Thanks.

Originally Posted by dynx

This reply has middle east writen all over it. I suspect some India.

This response has America written all over it. I suspect some Britain.

No, I google some geography.

I also like:

How do you hide money from a general surgeon?

Give it to his family.

Originally Posted by DocDanny

I also like:

How do you hide money from a general surgeon?

Give it to his family.

Actually, that's derived from the original:

How do you hide a $100 bill from a cardiac surgeon?

Give it to his son.

Originally Posted by kittykat

I had heard of the deli, but are we really called vultures behind our back...man.

As far what they call OB/GYN-- Team Estrogen, fans of Grey's Anatomy have heard Vagina Squad and Gyne Brigade. I of course don't use those terms...

In Path we are the step children of medicine...running on top of each other in the basement with no pot to pi** in and no window to throw it out of...speaking of windows, why can't we have a view?

I've heard OB called C&R for c*nts and runts.

Originally Posted by Buzz Me

Actually, that's derived from the original:

How do you hide a $100 bill from a cardiac surgeon?

Give it to his son.

How do you hide $100 from a pediatrician/psychiatrist?

They make hundred dollar bills?!?!?!