Are relationships falling apart Post-acceptance

[pianola]

Originally Posted by copperfrog09

From what Retsage just said, I think he is not a woman. And take his word with a grain of salt. It may be true for insecure women, who don't understand thei self-worth, but it is a gross generalization and not exactly "words to live by" if you're looking to get a girl. True respect goes a long way with confident girls who don't want to be walked all over in order to validate themselves.

yeah, not a big fan of the certain paternalism that intermittently appears in this thread.

Originally Posted by shadowdawg6

I know I'm prepared. Perhaps, the more important question is: where the hell do we find women who will be prepared as well? Suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Search me. I found an engineer. He's done with his master's and he's willing to be flexible about where we go, etc.

Actually, one of my friends in graduate school set me up with him on a 'blind date'. So...you could always get a friend that you trust to help set you up with a girl that s/he respects.

Or eHarmony.com.

[Azadre]

This thread has earned...

[pianola]

Originally Posted by SB100

Not in bars, that's for sure.

[shadowdawg6]

Originally Posted by pianola

Or eHarmony.com.

In your honest opinion, does the on-line method really work?

[lainapox]

Nah, after my acceptances, the dude I'm bangin (the dude I've been involved with for a while, who I plan to keep being involved with) just felt super proud of me, and had a better idea of where to look for a job or grad program. It was awesome.

[Azadre]

The key to a successful post-acceptance relationship is to understand that it will be unsuccessful. Try to get every bit of enjoyment out of it now, because once Medical School starts, it'll be like having your HS SO in college. I mirror Long Dong's approach on marriage, so I hope I do not break too many hearts over the next decade.

[cbrons]

Originally Posted by Vadd0

This thread has earned...

this is sweet

[redrumi]

Originally Posted by shadowdawg6

In your honest opinion, does the on-line method really work?

It is just like the real world method, except access to a broader field of folks then what your everyday life entails. So it has its successes and plenty of failures just like any other form of dating.

[jinx520]

Originally Posted by Vadd0

This thread has earned...

Hey! I want my own seal of approval! Santa? Can I...dang it, I just missed him! Now I have to wait for a whole year!

[copingmethods]

Originally Posted by pianola

That's also a lot of girls to date continuously over the course of what, 8 years?

I dunno, to be honest, I'd have a hard time if my partner decided he was going to follow a career path like that. I wonder how I can convey to my s.o. how long this path is going to be.

That's what I'm trying to figure out too. She says she's okay w/ the difficulties over the next 10 or so years, but will it still be during what Long Duc Dong described (working thanksgiving, xmas, new year's, etc.)? I guess only time will tell!

[amph119]

Ha I overheard my girlfriend's dad on the phone when she was talking to him while next to me. After he found out that I got accepted to Case, he told her to marry me now, ha. He was joking, of course, but it made me think.

[pianola]

Originally Posted by shadowdawg6

In your honest opinion, does the on-line method really work?

You know, I have no experience with it myself. I was semi-kidding. But my older sister (37 years old) found her current husband of 5 years through match.com, actually.

It's kind of a simpler way of wading through a bunch of people who might be attractive, but might have some kind of 'fatal flaw' that you can't see when you meet them in person.

I've been told that you 'get lots of experience with first dates' that way.

[shadowdawg6]

Originally Posted by pianola

You know, I have no experience with it myself. I was semi-kidding. But my older sister (37 years old) found her current husband of 5 years through match.com, actually.

It's kind of a simpler way of wading through a bunch of people who might be attractive, but might have some kind of 'fatal flaw' that you can't see when you meet them in person.

I've been told that you 'get lots of experience with first dates' that way.

I'm soooooooooooooo screwed.....

[pianola]

Originally Posted by shadowdawg6

I'm soooooooooooooo screwed.....

Nah. You don't have a biological clock. Besides, if you meet someone you like in med school they do have this thing called 'couples match' so your partner can match with you somewhere. You'll meet someone at some point. Chicks dig doctors .

Besides, I think Long Dong had the particular trajectory he did in part because he chose the specialty he did (derm). There are simpler, shorter ways of becoming a physician.

That's my read for whatever it's worth.

[Retsage]

Originally Posted by copperfrog09

From what Retsage just said, I think he is not a woman. And take his word with a grain of salt. It may be true for insecure women, who don't understand thei self-worth, but it is a gross generalization and not exactly "words to live by" if you're looking to get a girl. True respect goes a long way with confident girls who don't want to be walked all over in order to validate themselves.

Love it, but where did I say that there was no respect involved? Of course there is. There's just the added component of self-respect that too many men fail to have in relationships.

[Long Dong]

Originally Posted by copingmethods

That's what I'm trying to figure out too. She says she's okay w/ the difficulties over the next 10 or so years, but will it still be during what Long Duc Dong described (working thanksgiving, xmas, new year's, etc.)? I guess only time will tell!

Originally Posted by amph119

Ha I overheard my girlfriend's dad on the phone when she was talking to him while next to me. After he found out that I got accepted to Case, he told her to marry me now, ha. He was joking, of course, but it made me think.

That's exactly what I'm talking about. Your GF will be like mine and want to know how serious you are with them, if they stick it out with you, move to other cities with you, stay at home on holidays while you work, that in the end you won't leave them for someone in the medical field (someone you became close to, spending many nights on call with, can relate to more now that your life 80+ hours/week is medicine) or someone ten years younger then them when your a successfull 30 something eyeballing young 20 somethings.

[Long Dong]

Originally Posted by pianola

Chicks dig doctors .

Besides, I think Long Dong had the particular trajectory he did in part because he chose the specialty he did (derm). There are simpler, shorter ways of becoming a physician.

This is supposed to be the chillist residency, it just took alot of sacrifice to get here. On top of that chicks dig docs who are established/finished training not in training. It's like chicks dig guys with record deals not the those ones who are still trying to get signed, once you get signed you want the girl who was down with you when you were nothing, not the groupie who just wants to hang with the ballers.

[Livingapparatus]

buy the mystery method

now, every male when they turn 15 should get this book. It will save your dating life no matter what your circumstances.

I am firm believer in MM

[pianola]

Originally Posted by Long Dong

This is supposed to be the chillist residency, it just took alot of sacrifice to get here. On top of that chicks dig docs who are established/finished training not in training. It's like chicks dig guys with record deals not the those ones who are still trying to get signed, once you get signed you want the girl who was down with you when you were nothing, not the groupie who just wants to hang with the ballers.

Point taken. I just figured it took a lot of work to get a derm residency in the first place (which might strain a relationship). In any case, I think it might take a lot of work to convince my s.o. to drop everything and head for Rochester, Minnesota to do the derm residency in the first place (or medical school for that matter).

But last week, someone mentioned to me that the ratio of women to men is something like 5:1 in Rochester, MN. So if you haven't found someone yet, looks like you're at least in a good position to do so .

[pianola]

Originally Posted by Livingapparatus

buy the mystery method

Interesting description in wikipedia.

I don't think it's so much that women want to be treated with things like 'negs'. We don't want guys to act like we are 'uninteresting' or that they are of better value or anything like that...

I think we just want to find out if the guy can keep his pants together for 5 minutes, long enough to keep a conversation unrelated to 'the eventual goal.' Restraint re: sexual issues is an attractive quality. Desperation is attractive in neither men nor women.

[Azadre]

I like women who come onto me

[RevivedPreMed]

So here's my story:

My bf and I are both seniors, he applied to dental school this past summer and I'm applying to medical schools this upcoming summer. He got into the state school we go to as well as several out of state schools.

I knew that the long-distance thing wouldn't work, not because neither of us are not willing to try but because I did not think it was fair to put the stress on him of having to come visit me (I would visit him as well but I could not do it as frequent because I have a dog and it complicates things for me). It would take time away from his studies and his experiences in the new location.

He has never lived anywhere other than this state so I thought it was really important for him to leave. In order to make it work I offered to move to the new location and do an SMP there while I was applying.

He's pretty set now though on staying in state for the lower tuition so there really aren't any problems. I'll have a better shot at getting into my state's medical schools so I don't see problems in the future either.

The big problem with the crappy gf's in this thread is that they have no understanding as to what professional school entails and/or they want the guy to make all the effort and sacrifices. Not everyone is fortunate enough to get into several medical schools so how can a gf get upset if their bf has to move to go to medical school? In a case like that the gf should make the bigger sacrifice because she is more likely to be in a position to do so.

The point is that relationships are hard but usually worth fighting for. Everyone has to make sacrifices here and there but its for the greater good of both people.

[RevivedPreMed]

Originally Posted by sankondbest

I am just wondering if there are any other people who have had relationships fall apart post acceptance to medical school.

I know that after getting 5 acceptances my GF dumped me...and of all the reasons she cited this as why.


*note* she is applying to dental school and got rejected from every school we both applied to and has not even been offered an interview at any school yet. I think this is why she "freaked out" and dumped me.

She sounds retarded no offense.

Not only is she not going to dental school, but she's all alone now too.

I'd mail her an application to McDonald's but that's only because I'm mean and tend to dislike ridiculous girls like that.

[cyclin M]

Originally Posted by RevivedPreMed

I'd mail her an application to McDonald's but that's only because I'm mean and tend to dislike ridiculous girls like that.

Yes, then she might try to kill you because she's a psychopath and tend to kill people who screw with them like that.

IMO, stay away from psycho chicks, don't provoke them or anything. The McD's application will not end well.

[RevivedPreMed]

Originally Posted by cyclin M

Yes, then she might try to kill you because she's a psychopath and tend to kill people who screw with them like that.

IMO, stay away from psycho chicks, don't provoke them or anything. The McD's application will not end well.

I don't think she's a psychopath. She's clearly just a really insecure girl who is jealous of her bf's success. If she's was a psychopath, I'd say she'd go after the dental schools that rejected her.

[shadowdawg6]

Originally Posted by RevivedPreMed

The point is that relationships are hard but usually worth fighting for. Everyone has to make sacrifices here and there but its for the greater good of both people.

The way i see it, relationships are a lot of give and take. The problem, however, is that we're about to be put in a position in which we won't be able to give much but will require a lot of support. Perhaps, the tipping of the balance is what dooms so many of us.

[RevivedPreMed]

Originally Posted by shadowdawg6

The way i see it, relationships are a lot of give and take. The problem, however, is that we're about to be put in a position in which we won't be able to give much but will require a lot of support. Perhaps, the tipping of the balance is what dooms so many of us.

Yes but the taking you are are doing now is so that you can have a stable career and be able to do the giving later on.

I think it all balances out in the end.

[shadowdawg6]

Originally Posted by RevivedPreMed

I think it all balances out in the end.

I agree. I guess i just need to find someone who will realize that. Easier said than done though.

[Azadre]

Does anyone know if the relationships depicted in House of God are accurate?

[Retsage]

Originally Posted by pianola

Interesting description in wikipedia.

I don't think it's so much that women want to be treated with things like 'negs'. We don't want guys to act like we are 'uninteresting' or that they are of better value or anything like that...

But see, that's the thing - they do. Not consciously, mind you, but at a subconscious, evolutionary level. Regardless of how you think women want to be treated, the mystery method works and works wonderfully. I can attest to that, as can cbrons and Long dong (based on some terminology he's used in previous threads like "sarging").

[cyclin M]

Originally Posted by Retsage

But see, that's the thing - they do. Not consciously, mind you, but at a subconscious, evolutionary level. Regardless of how you think women want to be treated, the mystery method works and works wonderfully. I can attest to that, as can cbrons and Long dong (based on some terminology he's used in previous threads like "sarging").

um....just wondering, is this the mystery you're talking about?



I mean...that dude just looks ridiculous with his leather hat with what appears to be embedded hand cuffs??? Kind of like a clown you know what I mean?

Weren't we just talking about having self-respect?

[Retsage]

Yup. He's... eccentric. But he also pulls like a champ and has taught a lot of guys how to get girls.

Also, I think those are goggles, not handcuffs.

[cyclin M]

Originally Posted by Retsage

Yup. He's... eccentric. But he also pulls like a champ and has taught a lot of guys how to get girls.

Also, I think those are goggles, not handcuffs.

My mistake, I thought they looked like handcuffs.

Anyways, different strokes for different folks right? Whatever works for you I guess.

[Long Dong]

Originally Posted by Livingapparatus

buy the mystery method

now, every male when they turn 15 should get this book. It will save your dating life no matter what your circumstances.

I am firm believer in MM

Agreed 100% and that neil strauss guys book too.

Originally Posted by Retsage

Yup. He's... eccentric. But he also pulls like a champ and has taught a lot of guys how to get girls.

I can vouch that his shiznats does work. I've used some of his stuff to open sets. There is even a forum on the net that exchanges ideas. Maybe we should start a pua forum for docs.

[MarylandDude]

No girl can ever or will ever get in the way of what I've worked my whole life for.

[cbrons]

Originally Posted by Livingapparatus

buy the mystery method

now, every male when they turn 15 should get this book. It will save your dating life no matter what your circumstances.

I am firm believer in MM

driving in the right direction

Originally Posted by pianola

Interesting description in wikipedia.

I don't think it's so much that women want to be treated with things like 'negs'. We don't want guys to act like we are 'uninteresting' or that they are of better value or anything like that...

I think we just want to find out if the guy can keep his pants together for 5 minutes, long enough to keep a conversation unrelated to 'the eventual goal.' Restraint re: sexual issues is an attractive quality. Desperation is attractive in neither men nor women.

turned the car around =]

[cbrons]

Originally Posted by cyclin M

um....just wondering, is this the mystery you're talking about?



I mean...that dude just looks ridiculous with his leather hat with what appears to be embedded hand cuffs??? Kind of like a clown you know what I mean?

Weren't we just talking about having self-respect?

I know right, I mean, it must really suck for him.. having slept with hundreds of woman, having his own TV show, having a best selling book, having made millions on all his ventures and living in some mansion out on long beach. Life must be real tough for erik von markovick

[otterpop]

lol, some of Cbrons's comments remind me of the pick-up artist actually. I think the pick-up artist is ridiculous, but Cbrons is cool.

[otterpop]

Originally Posted by cbrons

I know right, I mean, it must really suck for him.. having slept with hundreds of woman, having his own TV show, having a best selling book, having made millions on all his ventures and living in some mansion out on long beach. Life must be real tough for erik von markovick

I don't know, I wonder how meaningful he feels his life is. All that is great, but... I think I'd want more substance to my life.

[cbrons]

Originally Posted by otterpop

lol, some of Cbrons's comments remind me of the pick-up artist actually. I think the pick-up artist is ridiculous, but Cbrons is cool.

thanks brother

Originally Posted by otterpop

I don't know, I wonder how meaningful he feels his life is. All that is great, but... I think I'd want more substance to my life.

If I'm not getting laid, I don't care how much substance mine has... anyone agree with me on that?

[katarina90]

Originally Posted by cyclin M

um....just wondering, is this the mystery you're talking about?



I mean...that dude just looks ridiculous with his leather hat with what appears to be embedded hand cuffs??? Kind of like a clown you know what I mean?

Weren't we just talking about having self-respect?

haha, i totally watched that show too. and i'm a girl.

i've been hit on by so many frat boys using the 'mystery method', i guess maybe it works on some females, but not really my thing. confidence is good, but imho it seems disingenuous when you know someone's just using some universal pickup line. (actually had a guy ask me, "do you think i should get a mohawk?") which was totally used on the show. busted.

it is funny though : )

[copperfrog09]

Originally Posted by cbrons

I know right, I mean, it must really suck for him.. having slept with hundreds of woman, having his own TV show, having a best selling book, having made millions on all his ventures and living in some mansion out on long beach. Life must be real tough for erik von markovick

Note: The guys on this thread are on one page, Pianola and I are on another. We assumed when you were talking about "getting girls" you were talking about for a relationship, but this advice is much more accurate if you are simply looking to sleep with girls. Also probably a "self-image" link here

[Azadre]

I just show girls the guns and they laugh. It gets them everytime.

[pianola]

Originally Posted by copperfrog09

Note: The guys on this thread are on one page, Pianola and I are on another. We assumed when you were talking about "getting girls" you were talking about for a relationship, but this advice is much more accurate if you are simply looking to sleep with girls. Also probably a "self-image" link here

Right on.

Like I said, the bad guy gets the girl (for...a night? a week? a month?), the good guy keeps the girl. All depends on what you're looking for.

Re: the "mystery method": Aren't any of you guys on this thread kind of worried that you'll forget how to do anything besides the 'negs' and the pretending to ignore the girl, etc., etc. etc. and that you won't be able to end up in a normal, functional relationship at the end?? I mean, sure the "mystery method" might be good for the 'intrigue' factor at the beginning, but how will it pan out later on in the relationship when you suddenly have to adjust your m.o. to be a normal part of a relationship?

No girl in her right mind (with any self-respect) is going to stay with a guy who actually acts aloof and superior, does these 'negs' things, etc. etc.

[pianola]

Originally Posted by shadowdawg6

The way i see it, relationships are a lot of give and take. The problem, however, is that we're about to be put in a position in which we won't be able to give much but will require a lot of support. Perhaps, the tipping of the balance is what dooms so many of us.

I would agree with this statement. I hope I'm able to reach 'the end' so that it can all balance out. I'm going to owe my s.o. a lot for his unwavering love and support.

And btw, he never used the "mystery method" on me.

[otterpop]

Originally Posted by pianola

Right on.

Like I said, the bad guy gets the girl (for...a night? a week? a month?), the good guy keeps the girl. All depends on what you're looking for.

Re: the "mystery method": Aren't any of you guys on this thread kind of worried that you'll forget how to do anything besides the 'negs' and the pretending to ignore the girl, etc., etc. etc. and that you won't be able to end up in a normal, functional relationship at the end?? I mean, sure the "mystery method" might be good for the 'intrigue' factor at the beginning, but how will it pan out later on in the relationship when you suddenly have to adjust your m.o. to be a normal part of a relationship?

No girl in her right mind (with any self-respect) is going to stay with a guy who actually acts aloof and superior, does these 'negs' things, etc. etc.

What exactly is the mystery method? And what are negs?

[Azadre]

I was looking back at the secret crush thread, and I saw that the only love I had was pianola's rejection

[pianola]

Originally Posted by otterpop

What exactly is the mystery method? And what are negs?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mystery_Method All defined there. Sounds...kind of ridiculous in print. I have no doubt some guys have some success with it.

Originally Posted by Vadd0

I was looking back at the secret crush thread, and I saw that the only love I had was pianola's rejection

Aw...I was teasing you I promise.

[otterpop]

I think people are making this whole dating thing way more complicated than it needs to be. Whatever happened to just being normal people? Men should be masculine and women should be feminine. That doesn't mean you have to be an ******* (guys) and it doesn't mean you need to act like Marilyn Monroe (women.) All that talk about playing your cards right and using the right pick-up lines for the sake of being able to score... I find it unnerving to see people trying so hard to act like someone they're not. To me, an honest girl of average looks who's down for whatever and will last a lifetime with me is so many times more attractive than a supermodel who's going to dump me a week later for the next guy who plays the "mysterious" game.

Unless, of course, that supermodel is Adriana Lima.

[pianola]

Originally Posted by otterpop

To me, an honest girl of average looks who's down for whatever and will last a lifetime with me is so many times more attractive than a supermodel who's going to dump me a week later for the next guy who plays the "mysterious" game.

Honest girls will appreciate your attitude for sure . The ones who are truly worth it are going to appreciate it in the end. And that's what matters (at least IMHO).