Am I too late?

[NeverGUP14]

In High School I guess you could label me as an underachiever? I graduated with barely a 2.0 (seriously it was absolutely horrible). When I graduated I knew college was my chance to start over and I really applied myself. I moved onto campus and that was the best thing for me seeing as how I didn't have any familial "drama" to deal with, it was effortless. My freshman year of college 2012/2013 ended with a 3.6 and on the Deans List. My second year however was not as smooth. I ran into some financial issues and I could not afford my books for my classes. Instead of taking care of things myself I left it to my dad, and failed all my midterms, which landed me on academic probation rightfully so.
Determined not to let a repeat happen second semester I took my refund and bought all my books as soon as my Professors made them available. On February 8, 2014 I got a call from my mother telling me my 17 year old sister had a baby. No one knew she was pregnant and she delivered him herself on the bathroom floor. I moved back home to help out and now I'm basically raising my nephew for a year while she's living on campus for a year.
I don't know what my G.P.A is because I'm too ashamed to even look at it. I've been dismissed from the university I was attending until I prove what's going on but I'm not sure how to do that without my sister granting me custody of my nephew. I know I could flake out and try to do something less challenging and easier but I want to do something I love and this is it. I'm at a complete loss and I'm wondering with basically 1 failed year is there anyway I can salvage my grades and make it into med school? Where do I start? Some help/advice is GREATLY appreciated!

-Thank You!

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[baxt1412]

Assuming this is a true thread....

Yes, you can salvage your grades. First off, focus on your family. School will always be there when you are ready to return. It sounds like you've got a lot of family and maybe personal issues to deal with. I strongly suggest seeing a psychiatrist/psychologist. There is nothing shameful about seeing either.

DO school would be perfect for you, because you can retake the courses you got a C+ or lower in and the grade will be replaced.


Write down concrete steps on paper. Execute them one at a time until each one is finished and then move on to the next.

Sorry, but you are not responsible for your nephew. If you WANT to help out your sister, then fine... but it seems kind of like you were maybe forced or coerced into it? Also, she is 17 but already in college?

 

[NeverGUP14]

My doctor suggested I talk to someone and right now I'm in the process of finding someone to talk to. I definitely have a LOT of familial issues and I think my biggest problem is caring extremely too much.
I wasn't really coerced but there was no one willing to come forward and take him at the time. My sister is off doing her own thing, I mean she really doesn't seem too interested in the kid right now so I volunteered(she's 18 now). My dad is off doing his own thing with his MANY women and my mom has a bum knee so she couldn't keep up with him if she tried, but she's a tremendous help.

Thank you for responding!

 

[baxt1412]

My doctor suggested I talk to someone and right now I'm in the process of finding someone to talk to. I definitely have a LOT of familial issues and I think my biggest problem is caring extremely too much.
I wasn't really coerced but there was no one willing to come forward and take him at the time. My sister is off doing her own thing, I mean she really doesn't seem too interested in the kid right now so I volunteered(she's 18 now). My dad is off doing his own thing with his MANY women and my mom has a bum knee so she couldn't keep up with him if she tried, but she's a tremendous help.

Thank you for responding!

Again, it's still not your responsibility to take care of your nephew even if your sister is disinterested. If you feel as if she is providing minimal to no support (financially or physically) to her son, then apply for legal guardianship if that is something you want. Sometimes tough decisions have to be made like adoption or foster care for children that could have a better life elsewhere.

Not trying to be a negative nancy, just trying to offer an outsider's opinion.

 

[PlaqueBuster]

Assuming everything to be true: I am sorry that things had to end up the way you described. While there are multiple ways to go about this, I have to offer a different suggestion from what was mentioned above. As important as family is, at the end of the day, it is your life and your future. It seems like your sister is not even remotely conerned for her child, so then why are you volunteering to take care of your nephew? Family is important but not when you don't have their support and best wishes. Your parents should be concerned about you and your education. Your sister is going to school.
My suggestion is to get yourself removed from this situation and continue with your higher education. If you are not financially dependent on your parents, then work and live off loans and study your ass off to get into medical school. You seem interested in going to medical school and while people say "you can apply whenever you want" that is not always the case. I feel like with the situation you are in, you may be stuck doing this for a while and it can interfere with your motivation. Seeking help whether its a counselor or psychiatrist would help. Proritize your goals and aspirations and balance them with family obligations. If these obligations are dragging you down/seem unfair/impede your future thentalk with your family and plan your future.

 

[hallowmann]

I'm not going go into the other stuff, because ultimately it involves decisions only you and your family could make.

To this question: "I'm at a complete loss and I'm wondering with basically 1 failed year is there anyway I can salvage my grades and make it into med school?"

Yes. Absolutely, especially with DO schools. You have a short history when it comes to undergrad, so you can easily salvage it with strategic retakes and doing better from here on out. It will certainly be harder for you though. You may want to consider part-time or CC classes for a while until you get things figured out.

Also, as far as failing this last semester/year, contact the school and explain that life problems have been an issue. Be upfront and honest, and see if there's any way your college or professors would be willing to retroactively make Fs into Ws or Incompletes that you could do extra work for later. When I was in undergrad, I didn't know this was possible when you essentially fail a whole semester/year by not showing up (I wish someone mentioned it to me then - it would have saved me years of work). From an adcom perspective, I believe it would look best for you if you manage to get yourself back into the school you were in, so I'd try to talk to them as much as possible.

Also, I'll give some advice, don't be so ashamed at your performance that you dig yourself deeper. Some things matter that you deal with them quickly, and not knowing your current situation will just make it harder for you to know what to do next (i.e. if you need to retake classes, it would be good to know which ones you failed or got <C in). Check your grades. Contact your school.

At very least, if you have to take a break/leave do on it good terms, so you could potentially return. People want to help, and everyone is human, but you have to ask for the help. Students have problems all the time, but no one will help unless you seek out help.

 

[100111]

You need legal proof. Everybody can just say they're taking care of a relative.

Goodluck dude. You should probs do the custody thing as said above and show that you dropped out to immediately work fulltime to provide financial support.

 

[moisne]

My doctor suggested I talk to someone and right now I'm in the process of finding someone to talk to. I definitely have a LOT of familial issues and I think my biggest problem is caring extremely too much.
I wasn't really coerced but there was no one willing to come forward and take him at the time. My sister is off doing her own thing, I mean she really doesn't seem too interested in the kid right now so I volunteered(she's 18 now). My dad is off doing his own thing with his MANY women and my mom has a bum knee so she couldn't keep up with him if she tried, but she's a tremendous help.

Thank you for responding!

The kid is your sister responsibility - talk to her and MAKE her take care of her own kid that she irresponsibly had. Tell her you are moving back and you can't put your life on hold her her. If you still want to care for the child - demand to adopt her. It is completely unfair to you.

 

[NeverGUP14]

Thank you all so much for your prompt responses. I really felt like I was losing ground here. One more question, I was visiting my old high school last week and a teacher told me I have six years to complete a degree before my credits become "invalid". Is that true?