"Funny quotes from 'less informed' pre-meds," On-Topic Edition

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Yeah, fun at the expense of people who can't change is kind of a jerk move.


ANYWAY, this is kind of an oldie I shared a while back:
Two bros in the school library at some computers were talking rather loudly;
Dude 1: Bruh! My uncle's a doctor and he makes like 200 grand a yeah, man!
Dude 2: F**k!
Dude 1: I should apply to med school, like, next fall. But doctors have to go to school for like 15 years or somthin'.
Dude 2: ****!
Dude 1: Yeah, I'm gonna have to stop smokin', I guess, man.
Dude 2: F**k thay ****, brah!
Stop overhearing my conversations.
LOL late on this one.

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In my first semester of college, during a review session, I point-blank asked the chemistry professor: Do we have to memorize this formula for the exam?

I think everyone else in the review session gave me the most blatant Did you really just ask that? stare I've ever gotten.
Lesson learned. Never again.
Don't sweat it. It's funny seeing freshman students ask the professor if they can go to the bathroom.
 
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Don't sweat it. It's funny seeing freshman students ask the professor if they can go to the bathroom.
To be fair, it seemed a little awkward in a small 10 person class for someone to just get up and leave during a discussion. But after a student asked if he could go to the bathroom, the professor made it clear that no permission was necessary.
 
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I still ask....and I'm a senior. :oops:

I guess it's my suthern upbringin'.
I just walk out like a boss, no one will dare to ask the big guy where he is going lol. I usually wait until I feel like I'm not gonna get in people's way.
 
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I just walk out like a boss, no one will dare to ask the big guy where he is going lol. I usually wait until I feel like I'm not gonna get in people's way.
If the teacher ever asks, you should say, "Hulk go to bathroom!"
 
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Sounds like the majority of my co-workers.

Yeah if only some of the idealistic SNDer's could spend a day in a physician dictation room for an afternoon. Some of the conversations that go on are hilarious and often quite morbid lol.
 
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If the teacher ever asks, you should say, "Hulk go to bathroom!"
My math professor asked me once if I scared off the students because so many people had dropped. Not sure if it was a compliment.;)
 
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Conversation I had with my pre-med friend right after she got her first acceptance:

Me: Congrats! Do you know what kind of doctor you want to be?
Her: Yes. An abortion doctor.
Me: That's... specific. What kind of specialty is that?
Her: It's own specialty? Or maybe you just major in abortions, I'm not entirely sure. I just want to give confused teenagers abortions, then while they're waking up from surgery I'll be there whispering in their ear like "you're going to hell, you murdering slut!"

She's a 4th year now, so watch out, World.

It's too bad I'm already married, she sounds like a catch.
 
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Not uninformed, but still funny. This one's courtesy of that "Timehop" app from which everyone's been posting things (at least on my Facebook feed). A year ago today I was but an enthusiastic unregistered SDN lurker, so I wouldn't have posted this in the other thread.

Orgo friend: "Yeah, doesn't cyanide mess with your midi-chlorians?"
Me: "Midi-chlorians."
Orgo friend: "Yeah. The electron transport—"
Me: "Midi-chlorians are from Star Wars."
Orgo friend: "...mitochondria. I'm tired, okay?"

He actually was just tired. Orgo friend beat me on the MCAT by three points, and it was deserved.

as a huge star wars enthusiast, tears coming out of my eyes right now haha. too much
 
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Nobody there was a pre-med, but I had this offensive gem of a conversation at Christmas with my family. ;)

Uncle: So Altblue what do you want to do with your biochem degree?
Me: Well I'm trying to apply to med school in a couple years.
Uncle: X has a good med school.
Aunt: Well good luck, you're not Asian.
Me: Okay
Cousin: Yeah they take a lot of those.
Uncle: Your cousin Abby was pre-med, but she didn't get in. Then she tried PA school
Aunt: They didn't let her in either. They took mostly Indians and Arabs.
Me: Oh...
Uncle: Well, she was one of the few people in the psychology program at her school and she graduated with that.

They'd adore some of SDN's threads. ;)
 
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Girl in class: I'm applying this summer, do you have any advice for me?
Me: Make sure you got about $5,000 that you are ready to part with
Girl: wow that's a lot of money! Did you apply to a lot of schools?
Me: meh I applied to about 24... not A LOT but enough...
Girl: holy cow! Yeah, I'm only applying to 5 bc I don't want to waste my money..
Me: 5?... do you have like a 39 MCAT? Even with stellar stats you want to apply to AT LEAST 12-15 schools to be safe, it's worth the money
Girl: No, I scored a 28. I will just apply to 5 good MD schools that I know FOR SURE I will get into
Me: ..... :whoa:
 
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Girl in class: I'm applying this summer, do you have any advice for me?
Me: Make sure you got about $5,000 that you are ready to part with
Girl: wow that's a lot of money! Did you apply to a lot of schools?
Me: meh I applied to about 24... not A LOT but enough...
Girl: holy cow! Yeah, I'm only applying to 5 bc I don't want to waste my money..
Me: 5?... do you have like a 39 MCAT? Even with stellar stats you want to apply to AT LEAST 12-15 schools to be safe, it's worth the money
Girl: No, I scored a 28. I will just apply to 5 good MD schools that I know FOR SURE I will get into
Me: ..... :whoa:

There's almost no talking sense to them either.
 
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There's almost no talking sense to them either.
A part of me wanted to sit her down and knock some sense into her and tell her she will 99.999% likely have to reapply, and that she needs to throw a massive net of both MD and DO as a white female w/ 28 mcat, and that she should start figuring out her school lists and plan and pre-write secondaries so she can submit day 1 and yadayada... but then the other half of me was like... no... there is little hope for this one... just let it go

OH.. I just remembered that wasn't the end of the convo:

Girl: No, I scored a 28. I will just apply to 5 good MD schools that I know FOR SURE I will get into
Me: ..... :whoa:after silence... well do you at least have a bunch of sweet experience you can write about? Research, volunteer, shadowing?
Girl: No, I don't like research.. and I haven't done any shadowing I might try to shadow a little over spring break...
Me: :uhno: ... and you're applying in 3 months? :bang:

I don't know whether to feel bad for her or just laugh or both... A lot of people dog on SDN but this is what may happen to those who don't come onto this forum and figure the process out.. they become incredibly naive and hopeless.
 
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Girl in class: I'm applying this summer, do you have any advice for me?
Me: Make sure you got about $5,000 that you are ready to part with
Girl: wow that's a lot of money! Did you apply to a lot of schools?
Me: meh I applied to about 24... not A LOT but enough...
Girl: holy cow! Yeah, I'm only applying to 5 bc I don't want to waste my money..
Me: 5?... do you have like a 39 MCAT? Even with stellar stats you want to apply to AT LEAST 12-15 schools to be safe, it's worth the money
Girl: No, I scored a 28. I will just apply to 5 good MD schools that I know FOR SURE I will get into
Me: ..... :whoa:
Granted I only applied to 7 schools, but I knew my target area. I only applied to my state MD schools and then 5 DO schools. I knew what my scores meant and knew what my targets should be. :p
(But I know it's not typical for it to work out!)
 
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Granted I only applied to 7 schools, but I knew my target area. I only applied to my state MD schools and then 5 DO schools. I knew what my scores meant and knew what my targets should be. :p
(But I know it's not typical for it to work out!)
You did well then! That's like going into a casino, putting $100 on 24 black and hitting it first spin.... and the part that was most terrifying is 5 MD schools with 28 mcat.. perhaps w/ 5 DO schools she would have slightly better luck but I'm not too informed on the DO side of the spectrum.
 
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Warning: semi- sassy post.

I tutor a kid in gen chem, and he is actually a really nice guy, but 1) he LOVES to randomly start conversations with other science majors about why evolution is wrong, and is pretty much completely close-minded to listening to counter-arguments. so there's that.

Second, he studies ALL the time. Now, let it be known that I have a great appreciation for people who aren't "naturally intelligent" and thus have to sometimes put in that extra effort (compared to others) in order to succeed. HOWEVER, when I say that he studies all the time, I mean that's preeetty much the ONLY thing he does, aside from attend class, eat, and sleep.

As per his own account, he has not had ANY experience with
--shadowing
--medical OR non-medical volunteering (at least since coming to college- he is a sophomore)
--paid employment.

(He just recently began a small research project, as an extra thing with myyyyy research advisor, after I went out of my way to introduce them and ask if he had any projects this guy could help out on). He's really excited to be starting research at "a younger age than the majority of pre-meds" (not sure if that's true, but also-- you're welcome dude).

But when I gently remind him to "start getting your foot in the door with these other things too", and to not under-estimate the importance of volunteering, etc. etc., he just keeps bringing up the fact that 2 labs in one semester is a lot to handle, so he has to put all his focus into that. :shifty:

typically, this then leads me into a moment of silence, as I force myself to keep a neutral expression and refrain from making any scoffing sounds

and without fail, he follows this up with the comment "but my parents are taking me to africa this summer, sooooo that'll look pretty good on my app when I apply."

:smack:
 
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Met a freshmen premed who said he would not do volunteer work in anything, because he doesn't want to give his time away for free. For clinical experiences, he plans on being a scribe so he wouldn't be wasting his time away for free.

:(
 
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Warning: semi- sassy post.

I tutor a kid in gen chem, and he is actually a really nice guy, but 1) he LOVES to randomly start conversations with other science majors about why evolution is wrong, and is pretty much completely close-minded to listening to counter-arguments. so there's that.

Second, he studies ALL the time. Now, let it be known that I have a great appreciation for people who aren't "naturally intelligent" and thus have to sometimes put in that extra effort (compared to others) in order to succeed. HOWEVER, when I say that he studies all the time, I mean that's preeetty much the ONLY thing he does, aside from attend class, eat, and sleep.

As per his own account, he has not had ANY experience with
--shadowing
--medical OR non-medical volunteering (at least since coming to college- he is a sophomore)
--paid employment.

(He just recently began a small research project, as an extra thing with myyyyy research advisor, after I went out of my way to introduce them and ask if he had any projects this guy could help out on). He's really excited to be starting research at "a younger age than the majority of pre-meds" (not sure if that's true, but also-- you're welcome dude).

But when I gently remind him to "start getting your foot in the door with these other things too", and to not under-estimate the importance of volunteering, etc. etc., he just keeps bringing up the fact that 2 labs in one semester is a lot to handle, so he has to put all his focus into that. :shifty:

typically, this then leads me into a moment of silence, as I force myself to keep a neutral expression and refrain from making any scoffing sounds

and without fail, he follows this up with the comment "but my parents are taking me to africa this summer, sooooo that'll look pretty good on my app when I apply."


:smack:

LOL at the end statement! I love it
 
Met a freshmen premed who said he would not do volunteer work in anything, because he doesn't want to give his time away for free. For clinical experiences, he plans on being a scribe so he wouldn't be wasting his time away for free.

:(
No altruism = no acceptance. Glad he won't ever make it.
 
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Met a freshmen premed who said he would not do volunteer work in anything, because he doesn't want to give his time away for free. For clinical experiences, he plans on being a scribe so he wouldn't be wasting his time away for free.

:(

He would fit right in on the Allo boards.
 
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This is the type of person who will get an outright reject.


Warning: semi- sassy post.

I tutor a kid in gen chem, and he is actually a really nice guy, but 1) he LOVES to randomly start conversations with other science majors about why evolution is wrong, and is pretty much completely close-minded to listening to counter-arguments. so there's that.

Second, he studies ALL the time. Now, let it be known that I have a great appreciation for people who aren't "naturally intelligent" and thus have to sometimes put in that extra effort (compared to others) in order to succeed. HOWEVER, when I say that he studies all the time, I mean that's preeetty much the ONLY thing he does, aside from attend class, eat, and sleep.

As per his own account, he has not had ANY experience with
--shadowing
--medical OR non-medical volunteering (at least since coming to college- he is a sophomore)
--paid employment.

(He just recently began a small research project, as an extra thing with myyyyy research advisor, after I went out of my way to introduce them and ask if he had any projects this guy could help out on). He's really excited to be starting research at "a younger age than the majority of pre-meds" (not sure if that's true, but also-- you're welcome dude).

But when I gently remind him to "start getting your foot in the door with these other things too", and to not under-estimate the importance of volunteering, etc. etc., he just keeps bringing up the fact that 2 labs in one semester is a lot to handle, so he has to put all his focus into that. :shifty:

typically, this then leads me into a moment of silence, as I force myself to keep a neutral expression and refrain from making any scoffing sounds

and without fail, he follows this up with the comment "but my parents are taking me to africa this summer, sooooo that'll look pretty good on my app when I apply."

:smack:
 
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Not a premed (that I know of), just slightly weird comment from someone in my current chem 2 lab.

Professor: As you work, I'll be handing back your lab reports from last week.

Girl near me (to me): Hey, did you turn your lab report in last week?

Me: yes....?

Girl (not exaggerating here): Oh my god, really!? You're sooooo lucky!!

Wait, what? I don't think it's "lucky" to actually turn in your assignments... I think that's one of the minimum requirements of passing... Even worse, we had two weeks to complete it due to a snow day.
 
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You did well then! That's like going into a casino, putting $100 on 24 black and hitting it first spin.... and the part that was most terrifying is 5 MD schools with 28 mcat.. perhaps w/ 5 DO schools she would have slightly better luck but I'm not too informed on the DO side of the spectrum.

5-6 schools with a 28 wasn't uncommon back when I was applying, but it depended on what state you were from. My classmates from Michigan and Ohio could get away with that. PA, MD, IN, and CA... not so much.
 
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5-6 schools with a 28 wasn't uncommon back when I was applying, but it depended on what state you were from. My classmates from Michigan and Ohio could get away with that. PA, MD, IN, and CA... not so much.
Kentucky. ;)
 
The professor in my Anthropology class was explaining the timeline abbreviations (AD, BC, BCE, etc.). After he was done, a pre-med girl sitting in front of me raised her hand and asked.... with a completely serious tone and expression.... "Were the dinosaurs BC?"

The class was dead silent.

The professor awkwardly said "yes dear they have been extinct for millions and millions of years."

Then he awkwardly continued with the rest of his lecture.
 
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Funny quote from uninformed partner of a pre-med.

Me: "I wish I didn't have acne scars."
Partner: "Are there treatments for that?"
Me: "I don't know. I think they do dermabrasion."
Partner: "Did you have cystic fibrosis on your face?"
Me: (Re-entering bathroom to be sure I heard him right and trying not to smile) "...what did you just say?"
Partner: "Did you have cystic fibrosis on your face?"
Me: (Laughing) "That's a lung disease. I think you mean cystic acne."
Partner: (Now also laughing) "Yeah, did you have cystic fibrosis on your face?"
 
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Funny quote from uninformed partner of a pre-med.

Me: "I wish I didn't have acne scars."
Partner: "Are there treatments for that?"
Me: "I don't know. I think they do dermabrasion."
Partner: "Did you have cystic fibrosis on your face?"
Me: (Re-entering bathroom to be sure I heard him right and trying not to smile) "...what did you just say?"
Partner: "Did you have cystic fibrosis on your face?"
Me: (Laughing) "That's a lung disease. I think you mean cystic acne."
Partner: (Now also laughing) "Yeah, did you have cystic fibrosis on your face?"

Of course you didn't have acne. Your acne scars just appeared out of nowhere. :rolleyes:
 
Of course you didn't have acne. Your acne scars just appeared out of nowhere. :rolleyes:
Well, he wanted to know if it was cystic acne or less serious acne. But apparently he didn't know what CF is.
 
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Girl in class: I'm applying this summer, do you have any advice for me?
Me: Make sure you got about $5,000 that you are ready to part with
Girl: wow that's a lot of money! Did you apply to a lot of schools?
Me: meh I applied to about 24... not A LOT but enough...
Girl: holy cow! Yeah, I'm only applying to 5 bc I don't want to waste my money..
Me: 5?... do you have like a 39 MCAT? Even with stellar stats you want to apply to AT LEAST 12-15 schools to be safe, it's worth the money
Girl: No, I scored a 28. I will just apply to 5 good MD schools that I know FOR SURE I will get into
Me: ..... :whoa:
I applied to one school with a 28 MCAT and got in.
 
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I applied to one school with a 28 MCAT and got in.

The fact that someone inevitably wins every powerball does not mean that everyone will inevitably win the powerball.




But congrats anyway. :=|:-):
 
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I applied to one school with a 28 MCAT and got in.
Many people win the lottery .. hit jackpots in vegas ... shoot themselves in the head and live...

EDIT: spinach had similar thoughts I see ^^
 
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I applied to one school with a 28 MCAT and got in.
You are the exception to the rule. Don't speak as if your exception IS the rule. Because it's not, as others who posted before me have aptly stated.
 
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As we all pile on @bells927, I will note that she applied early decision per her posting history. Some people do that, though hopefully after very careful consideration.

Anyway, back to more poorly informed premeds! I wanted to post a story to get this back on track but it didn't really make any sense, so forget it.
 
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A premed girl (girl A) in my biochemistry class mocked another girl (girl B), insinuating she (girl B) wasn't smart enough to hold an intelligent conversation, in front of the whole class. Totally unprovoked! The irony was overwhelming, though, as girl A is enrolled in a post bac program at my uni, which, is fine in and of itself, but in the context of putting other people down with intelligence remarks...... Well I just cant make sense of that.......


I'm seriously surprised with some of the personality types that are pursing medicine. I see no compassion in this girl.
 
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As we all pile on @bells927, I will note that she applied early decision per her posting history. Some people do that, though hopefully after very careful consideration.

Anyway, back to more poorly informed premeds! I wanted to post a story to get this back on track but it didn't really make any sense, so forget it.
Ha, I knew I would get heat for that comment. I did think it through very carefully and felt confident applying early decision. If I didn't do early decision, I definitely would have applied broadly. Definitely a much different situation from the girl in the original post, who hadn't done any research or shadowing. Just wanted to emphasize that a 28 MCAT isn't the end of the world :)

But yeah, moving on...

The only funny pre-med instances I can think of at the moment have been fairly common on these threads...such as this freshman girl announcing she is going to be a pediatric cardiologist only to switch to business the next semester... Or my personal favorite: literally anyone in my SO's family finding out I'll be going to medical school and having them tell me some variation of "Oh, you'll make a great nurse!" :meh:
 
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A premed girl (girl A) in my biochemistry class mocked another girl (girl B), insinuating she (girl B) wasn't smart enough to hold an intelligent conversation, in front of the whole class. Totally unprovoked! The irony was overwhelming, though, as girl A is enrolled in a post bac program at my uni, which, is fine in and of itself, but in the context of putting other people down with intelligence remarks...... Well I just cant make sense of that.......


I'm usually not one to get annoyed by things on the internet, but I just want to point out that not everyone who takes a post-bacc does so for gpa repair or because we are stupid. Some of us have had great grades and success in other careers before the medicine bug bit us. It drives me crazy every time someone gives me that "look" when I say I took a post-bacc. I (and most of the people in my post-bacc) had phenomenal grades in undergrad, we just didn't have all of the pre-reqs for med school.

edited to move quotation mark
 
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Ha, I knew I would get heat for that comment. I did think it through very carefully and felt confident applying early decision. If I didn't do early decision, I definitely would have applied broadly. Definitely a much different situation from the girl in the original post, who hadn't done any research or shadowing. Just wanted to emphasize that a 28 MCAT isn't the end of the world :)

But yeah, moving on...

The only funny pre-med instances I can think of at the moment have been fairly common on these threads...such as this freshman girl announcing she is going to be a pediatric cardiologist only to switch to business the next semester... Or my personal favorite: literally anyone in my SO's family finding out I'll be going to medical school and having them tell me some variation of "Oh, you'll make a great nurse!" :meh:

I'm super confused by this because I'be seen and heard it a lot especially with my female friends. Where do people think doctors come from?? Are they unicorns?!
 
Me: "you take the MCAT?"

Guy: "yeah.. Got a 21.. Not as good as I wanted.. I'll try retaking it but hey, if that doesn't work as well I've been to the Caribbean and I love it there"

Me: "you know those students have more trouble getting into residency"

Guy: "not really, their USLME scores are higher on average than 2/3 of US med schools, almost all of them get into residency, I called them and they told me"

Me: "that's not what I heard"

Guy: "well I mean that's what they told me"

Me: *mental facepalm* Just retake the MCAT and do better and see where it goes from there. Good luck
 
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I know I'm some sixty posts too late but to add to the cadaver lab discussion:

At the schools where I interviewed, they showed us their anatomy lab but all cadavers were covered. I don't see why applicants would need to see the cadavers themselves (they will not learn anatomy in two minutes during the tour and it is unethical to the cadaver) but it's important to see where they might be spending a huge chunk of their fist year in med school.
 
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One of my "favorite" stories is from one of my former co-workers. A bit of background first: 0 clinical experience, 0 volunteering, 0 research, 0 shadowing, hasn't taken the MCAT yet, and has a 3.4 GPA (not a bad GPA, but clearly has nothing to supplement it with). Oh, also, he is the most arrogant person I have ever met, constantly talks down to you using big words like he has a thesaurus to his face, and SUCKS to work with in every way you can imagine.

Him: So, did you get into any medical schools yet?
Me: Yes! I've been accepted to three, I am very fortunate.
Him: Oh, that's cool. I'm going to apply next year.
Me: Nice! Have you been doing any shadowing or getting clinical experience?
Him: No, I don't really need that. I'm a very passionate person and I KNOW that will come through during interviews (automatically assuming he will get them). I think I am going to go to either Harvard or Johns Hopkins and then become a trauma surgeon.
Me: Whoah! Going big, huh? (obviously I know he is full of it at this point) Did you crush the MCAT or what?
Him: Nah, I haven't taken it yet. But, as you know (I wasn't even aware I knew!), I am one of the smartest people around - especially with all of the idiots that work here (we definitely do not work with idiots). I don't need to study for verbal because I read a lot, and I am very scientifically inclined.
Me: Well sounds like you have it in the bag!
Him: (huge grin) Yeah, it's too bad you couldn't get into the top schools, but I think you'll still become an adequate doctor.
Me: (laughing) Good luck, you're going to need it! - I left the room immediately after I said this, and, as I looked back, he had a very confused look on his face, like he was trying to crack a safe lol.

He quit shortly after we had this conversation, so I cannot be totally sure of the outcome of his application cycle, but I think it is safe to say that he is not going to Harvard :smack:
 
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