I was surfing the web on how to politely turn down a job offer and I thought this was too funny not to share.
I changed the letter a tad so it's more relevant to pre-meds, and on the slim chance that the names/addresses/etc. were real in the original, I've changed those as well. But I was always taught to cite my sources and give them credit (I definitely didn't think it up!), so the original link is at the bottom...
Feel free to change or add to it to make it better
http://www.scribd.com/doc/32390/The-Ultimate-Rejection-Letter
I changed the letter a tad so it's more relevant to pre-meds, and on the slim chance that the names/addresses/etc. were real in the original, I've changed those as well. But I was always taught to cite my sources and give them credit (I definitely didn't think it up!), so the original link is at the bottom...
Feel free to change or add to it to make it better
Charles de Gaul
Dean of Admissions
543A Arby's Hall, Taco Bell Medical School
Chipotle, MO 12345
Dear Dean de Gaul,
Thank you for your letter of March 16. After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me a first year position in the class of 2013.
This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.
Despite Princeton Medical Schools outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not needs my needs at this time. Therefore, I will assume the position of first year medical student in your incoming class this August. I look forward to seeing you then.
Best of luck in rejecting future applicants,
Sincerely,
Winston Churchill
http://www.scribd.com/doc/32390/The-Ultimate-Rejection-Letter