Has anyone cried in front of their professor before?

[believe <3]

Hey guys, I have a problem and I don't know how to move on...I recently took an organic chemistry test and completely bombed it. When the time came to hand in our papers, I couldn't do it and went to my professor to tell him in advance that I had completely failed it. Unfortunately, I got overwhelmed and started tearing up (not bawling, but I did cry a bit ). I asked him what he thought my options were and he told me that I could retake it if I wanted. My professor is awfully nice but now I'm so embarrassed to face him! I wish I hadn't cried like some weak person (although I had some valid reasons for the stress).

Any thoughts on this? Is it really damaging for me to have done this? FYI, I'm not planning to get a rec letter or anything from this prof.

How do I get over my embarrassment and start talking to him normally again? I'm scared that he hates me now and I can't even bring myself to sit in class for the rest of the semester or go to his office!

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[QuinnTheEskimo]

Professors see this stuff all the time, especially in the harder classes (e.g., orgo). I wouldn't give it a second thought.

Think rationally about this. If you were in your professor's shoes, would YOU "hate" a student who cried because he/she thought she failed a difficult exam?

 

[Pacna]

Because people hate people for crying...?

 

[Mr Roboto]

It's nothing he hasn't seen before. Seriously, don't worry about it at all

 

[believe <3]

Thanks for the responses so would it be okay for me to email him regarding the retake date? Should I apologize in my email and say anything about my actions?

I just feel so stupid because no one else in my class seems to have a problem with organic except me. I'm taking 20 credits this semester and I'm doing well in every class except this one...it's so discouraging.

 

[DrCharlemagne]

I cried in front of a German Professor when I had to confess my computer ate my political science paper and all I had was a third draft and an outline. It was the most awkward attempt at being reassured that I've ever received.

Your professor doesn't hate you.

 

[Pacna]

Thanks for the responses so would it be okay for me to email him regarding the retake date? Should I apologize in my email and say anything about my actions?

I just feel so stupid because no one else in my class seems to have a problem with organic except me. I'm taking 20 credits this semester and I'm doing well in every class except this one...it's so discouraging.

If you're a female, yes you'll need to address it in the email.

I say this because it's possibly assumed that when girls cry in situations like this that they are digging for a sympathetic break (think traffic tickets). Not everyone is going to think this, but I think profs more than anyone are probably on guard for this type of thing.

If you're a male, you can bring it up if you feel comfortable, but I would avoid it.

 

[QuinnTheEskimo]

If you're a female, yes you'll need to address it in the email.

I say this because it's possibly assumed that when girls cry in situations like this that they are digging for a sympathetic break (think traffic tickets). Not everyone is going to think this, but I think profs more than anyone are probably on guard for this type of thing.

If you're a male, you can bring it up if you feel comfortable, but I would avoid it.

I just assumed OP was female because no guy would 1) cry over an orgo test, or 2) obsess like this --"omg my professor HATES me omg omg." Sorry to sound like a sexist ass, but it's the truth.

OP, you need to brush it off and grow a thicker skin. I recommend going to your professor's office and talking to him directly, rather than emailing.

 

[bluepeach9]

If you're a female, yes you'll need to address it in the email.

I say this because it's possibly assumed that when girls cry in situations like this that they are digging for a sympathetic break (think traffic tickets). Not everyone is going to think this, but I think profs more than anyone are probably on guard for this type of thing.

If you're a male, you can bring it up if you feel comfortable, but I would avoid it.

 

[stupid9234]

Your professor lets you guys retake it? No wonder no one else has a problem, he makes it easy enough.

 

[believe <3]

If you're a female, yes you'll need to address it in the email.

I say this because it's possibly assumed that when girls cry in situations like this that they are digging for a sympathetic break (think traffic tickets). Not everyone is going to think this, but I think profs more than anyone are probably on guard for this type of thing.

If you're a male, you can bring it up if you feel comfortable, but I would avoid it.

I'm sorry, I don't get what you mean. Why is it important if I am a female? If it helps, I think my prof. understands the situation. I had just gotten off a 21-hour plane ride, was severely jetlagged and feeling nauseous, but still took the exam that day because I didn't know if it was feasible to reschedule with all my other finals coming up. Plus I thought it was too late to do so.

Do you have any ideas as to how I can phrase my apology in the email?

 

[believe <3]

Your professor lets you guys retake it? No wonder no one else has a problem, he makes it easy enough.

He usually doesn't =/ I think the fact that I was crying and super stressed suggested that I really needed a good grade. If anyone in the class found out that I could retake it, I think he would take back the chance he is giving me.

 

[believe <3]

I just assumed OP was female because no guy would 1) cry over an orgo test, or 2) obsess like this --"omg my professor HATES me omg omg." Sorry to sound like a sexist ass, but it's the truth.

OP, you need to brush it off and grow a thicker skin. I recommend going to your professor's office and talking to him directly, rather than emailing.

I already talked to him directly after the test and explained what happened and why I did so bad. All I need to know is when I can retake it, so wouldn't it be okay to just email him? I don't think I can go to his office yet until he tells me my next step...I am just really embarrassed right now.

 

[stupid9234]

He usually doesn't =/ I think the fact that I was crying and super stressed suggested that I really needed a good grade. If anyone in the class found out that I could retake it, I think he would take back the chance he is giving me.

Still... you're very lucky.

 

[DreamerAchiever]

Last week I had cried in front of my professor, we always talk during her office hours and she noticed I looked particularly sad, I couldn't help but finally break down and tell her what was going on. She was totally understanding and even gave me an extension on my assignment.

 

[QuinnTheEskimo]

I already talked to him directly after the test and explained what happened and why I did so bad. All I need to know is when I can retake it, so wouldn't it be okay to just email him? I don't think I can go to his office yet until he tells me my next step...I am just really embarrassed right now.

I think it's better to discuss things like this in person.

Also -- you said above that you are having trouble in organic. The worst possible thing you can do is start skipping classes now, after your professor offered to let you retake the test. You want to be (or at least appear to be) a student who works hard to overcome adversity. If you stop going to class, he probably will just peg you as a crazy girl who is having some kind of typical millenial mental breakdown. You need to grab the bull by the horns here, OP. Don't wallow in your embarrassment.

Edit: Correction to the above. You might consider emailing, if only so that you have a written record of the exchange. You don't want your professor to pull a "I never said you could retake the test."

 

[believe <3]

Still... you're very lucky.

Yeah I know. I feel bad that I can't do well in the one class where my professor truly wants me to succeed. I feel like I'm not doing enough justice to all the effort he puts in to teach us. And now it's the end of the semester, so not much I can do to get over that guilt. Plus I really just don't like chemistry =(

 

[Awesome Sauceome]

after my organic II final I collapsed into my professors arms... a tear of joy may have fallen haha. She was a very motherly figure though who I had worked for and stuff, so we were tight heh

 

[stevvo111]

Yeah I know. I feel bad that I can't do well in the one class where my professor truly wants me to succeed. I feel like I'm not doing enough justice to all the effort he puts in to teach us. And now it's the end of the semester, so not much I can do to get over that guilt. Plus I really just don't like chemistry =(

well the worst thing you could do is retake it and do equally as bad. The professor would think of you poorly if this happened. He's giving you a chance because he thinks you truly could have done better.

My advice, no need to apologize. What you can apologize is for poor planning for having taken a 21 hour plane ride right before the exam (unless of course he doesn't know this). Apologizing for crying is like apologizing for punching someone in the face. You don't really want to apologize because you did it for a reason and it was not controllable (well you can usually control punching people, but just bear with me here).

So you shouldn't email, rather go see him and say "sorry about the previous day(non specific reason is intentional), though it was genuine, and I would appreciate the retake as I know for a fact that I can improve significantly", retake the darn thing, crush it, and then apologize after crushing it saying "as you can see from my baller score, I wasn't kidding when I said I was super anxious and had legit excuses, it won't happen again"- end of story

Also, why are you taking 20 credits? you're not impressing anyone, and it's plain stupid. Advice for future semesters...don't take so many freaking credits. you'll probably have more time to prepare and won't be tempted to cry for any reason (even 21 hour flights)

Also, why were you taking a huge flight the day before the exam? That's pretty stupid too. Unless it was a family emergency (in which case you probably could have gotten out of your exam...very easily), you have no reason to be doing wacko flights like that near the end of a semester when exams are up and coming. lol, I'm just being hard on you, I'm sure you had legit reasons, but learn from your mistakes and plan ahead next time so nothing like this every has to happen again.

 

[mehc012]

I'm sorry, I don't get what you mean. Why is it important if I am a female? If it helps, I think my prof. understands the situation. I had just gotten off a 21-hour plane ride, was severely jetlagged and feeling nauseous, but still took the exam that day because I didn't know if it was feasible to reschedule with all my other finals coming up. Plus I thought it was too late to do so.

Do you have any ideas as to how I can phrase my apology in the email?

I don't think you need to address it. Honestly, people often feel unnecessarily awkward about these things and it can make it worse to focus on it much. At the most I'd slip in a "sorry for getting so upset" or "sorry for being such a mess" (depending on how well you know them) before your thanks.

Also, pet peeve of mine (and so you don't continue to inadvertently imply things as so many people do), nauseous means that you make other people feel ill. Nauseated is when you feel ill. I sincerely hope you were neither, but, in terms of embarrassment, I particularly hope you were not nauseous!

 

[youmed]

Talk in person to discuss about the retake. Such a huge chance should not be discussed over email. Go to his OH and talk to him when no one is there. Once you start conversing over email, prof. will get annoyed about setting up the retake and you may lose that chance.

 

[Served]

I asked him what he thought my options were and he told me that I could retake it if I wanted.

 

[KnuxNole]

I just assumed OP was female because no guy would 1) cry over an orgo test, or 2) obsess like this --"omg my professor HATES me omg omg." Sorry to sound like a sexist ass, but it's the truth.

OP, you need to brush it off and grow a thicker skin. I recommend going to your professor's office and talking to him directly, rather than emailing.

I've seen guys cry over a test frequently.

 

[QuinnTheEskimo]

I've seen guys cry over a test frequently.

I have never seen anyone of either gender cry over a test, thankfully.

 

[KnuxNole]

There might be some guys/girls bawling over their first gross anatomy test in your class

 

[BestDoctorEver]

Physics 1 w/ Calculus --4 credit hour... My average was 77.5 after the final exam... I said to myself that C would damage my sGPA... Went to see the prof before submitting the grades to registrar and cried my heart out.. Two days later grades were out... B appeared in my transcript... Elated! That was the only time that worked for me... Same tactics did not work for micro--got a freaking C+.

 

[ShySpliceosome]

I know at least 2 guys who cried because of O-Chem, lol...I failed my first O-Chem exam also, and my professor had written at the top of my exam "Please see me." I dreaded having to go to his office, and when I walked in, he asked what had happened and I said, "I don't know" and my voice was shaking, and I was blinking back tears...not my best moment, lol. But I don't think it's anything to be embarrassed about!

"Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it." - Albert Smith

 

[La Presse]

Something about seeing my peers cry makes me warm and fuzzy inside.

 

[terp720]

I cried when I talked to a professor because I had just bombed an exam... granted it was the day after my friend's funeral and it was not a good idea for me to take the test.
But I don't think you need to apologize. you showed emotion, not a big deal. But I would explain that you were overwhelmed by the other things that you mentioned and then just thank him for giving you the chance to make up the exam and perform at your best.

 

[Kochanie]

+1,000,000

 

[thisisansley]

I've cried in front of several of my professors (I'm a naturally weepy person and was going through some tough family stuff last year), don't be embarrassed - if they have any semblance of human decency, they don't think any less of you. I agree with the above though, speak to him in person and study your butt off to make sure you do well.

 

[Kochanie]

Yeah, I easily tear up all the time. I told my teacher this in high school (we were close) and when she was about to give me feedback on my paper, she said "don't cry...." before haha.

 

[tomfools123]

Something about seeing my peers cry makes me warm and fuzzy inside.

I teach undergraduates, and the tears of pre-meds are like the first rains of spring... they make the sun come out, the flowers bloom and birds chirp

 

[Spitphire]

I'm actually shocked to see how many people have seen others cry over a test

 

[thisisansley]

Idk if you've heard of Mary Lambert (she sang on that Macklemore song Same Love but is a wonderful solo artist) but she talks about this all the time! She cries in almost every interview and I met her after a show and by the end of our 5 min conversation we were both sobbing.

My point is, some people just cry easier than others - it's nothing to be ashamed of.

 

[sobored]

What a bunch of cry babies in this thread.

 

[deleted407021]

I've never seen someone cry at uni over an exam. Most people's composure is much stronger than that.

 

[Mad Jack]

Hey guys, I have a problem and I don't know how to move on...I recently took an organic chemistry test and completely bombed it. When the time came to hand in our papers, I couldn't do it and went to my professor to tell him in advance that I had completely failed it. Unfortunately, I got overwhelmed and started tearing up (not bawling, but I did cry a bit ). I asked him what he thought my options were and he told me that I could retake it if I wanted. My professor is awfully nice but now I'm so embarrassed to face him! I wish I hadn't cried like some weak person (although I had some valid reasons for the stress).

Any thoughts on this? Is it really damaging for me to have done this? FYI, I'm not planning to get a rec letter or anything from this prof.

How do I get over my embarrassment and start talking to him normally again? I'm scared that he hates me now and I can't even bring myself to sit in class for the rest of the semester or go to his office!

I've cried in front of a professor before, over matters unrelated to school (life was really bad for me at that time). She offered me a freakin' job after I finished the course because I still aced it despite everything going on in my life, and that's the kind of person she wanted working for her. Crying is one of those weird things that makes both the person doing it and the person seeing it emotionally vulnerable. The person seeing it realizes you're a human being, rather than just another face in the lecture hall. He's also a guy seeing a girl cry because of a test he gave her- he probably felt a bit guilty, and honestly feels bad for you. I wouldn't overthink it, and it isn't really that damaging in the long term. If anything, should you work with this professor more later on and have him see that you are a good student that is capable of high-quality work, he might be a great person to ask for a letter of recommendation from. He sure as hell won't forget who you are, and if you show you were a great student that was just having an awful day, he'll probably feel even better about writing you that LOR, because he gave you your chance to shine by cutting you some slack. Or maybe he'll just feel guilty about writing you a bad LOR because he'll picture you crying about your rejection- either way, you're good lol.

 

[mehc012]

I was crying in the hallway as we were lining up to take an exam once (unrelated to school, family stuff). My prof opened the door, and as I was walking in, drying my face she grabbed my shoulder and told me to get out of there. I was horrified for a second, thinking I was in trouble, but she just said that I should clearly take the exam some other time.

 

[lumpyduster]

It was a few minutes before the beginning of my physics class. Someone must have decided decided to go to the bathroom or the water fountain right before class and return a couple minutes after the start of the lecture to minimize their time trying to figure out what on earth we were talking about that day by 4%. Mistake. Someway, somehow, the stars had aligned and her walk to the door was, unbeknownst to her, a walk towards looming danger. I was spacing out, looking at the terrible mass of equations left on the board from the previous class when I suddenly heard, "JESUS CHRIST!"

No, it was not actually the second-coming of the son of God. My professor had arrived and had apparently decided it would be a good idea to open the door with the gusto of Severus Snape on Harry's first day of class. I mean he threw the door open. Right into that girls face, causing her to cry out. She apparently broke her nose and had to go to the hospital to get it reset. I always thought broken noses were like tickets to free nose jobs or something but hers looked the same afterward. Anyway, she was bawling and our professor almost fainted when she started to bleed a little bit.

This isn't really relevant to the thread, but I think she got a letter of rec from him because the next lecture she brought in copies of her x-rays and we estimated the amount of force he must have used to break it. He loved it.

 

[BundleofHis]

I broke my foot in my physics class (the day before the exam) and had to take a make-up because of a doctor's appointment. I was overwhelmed and didn't study enough and definitely started crying in his office while taking the test. That was my biggest moment of weakness in college.

 

[chillaxbro]

Ahhh the advantages of being a girl

 

[Reckoner]

"Heaven knows we need never be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts." - Charles Dickens

 

[Reckoner]

"Big girls don't cry." - Fergie

 

[Catman21]

I'm sorry, I don't get what you mean. Why is it important if I am a female? If it helps, I think my prof. understands the situation. I had just gotten off a 21-hour plane ride, was severely jetlagged and feeling nauseous, but still took the exam that day because I didn't know if it was feasible to reschedule with all my other finals coming up. Plus I thought it was too late to do so.

Do you have any ideas as to how I can phrase my apology in the email?

plain and simple: in my college experience, out of all the people ive seen brought to tears over stress/school, its flat out been female 20:1. It might be awkward for your professor if you were a male and you brought it back up. Men tend to just forget and not talk about.. not constantly bring up awkward situations. But seeing how you're female, you wouldnt understand this complicated area of the male psyche.

 

[dbeast]

Wait until your clerkships. You'll meet people whose goal is to make you cry. Enjoy your warm and fuzzy professor while you have him.

 

[chillinillinkillin007]

wtf is this. You cried in front of your professor because you failed your test and your professor is giving u the option to RETAKE IT? There are only 3 explanations

1) Troll
2) OP goes to a really unrepuatable undergrad
3) OP is at least a 8 or 9 out of ten

My gut feeling is troll since I refuse to believe professors hand out retakes for no justified reason

 

[TheWeeIceMan]

I bet you've never gotten a speeding ticket.

 

[amazing tekkers]

i cry evertim

All jokes aside, retake the exam and do your best--next time, don't over do it with 20 credits. I don't even remember the last time I cried

 

[amazing tekkers]

"Big girls don't cry." - Fergie