I am of the belief that religion has become the biggest crock of **** on Earth, I do believe in God, make no mistake about it, but religion is merely a man made process of how we connect with God, and that is mostly ****ed and see the results, its not pretty, we got people murdering each other because of it, we got people following stupid and ******ed rituals and beliefs because of it and we got so much division on this planet because of it. I do believe in God, but I think religion is ****ing Evil.
Have you ever dated outside your race or religion?
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I am of the belief that religion has become the biggest crock of **** on Earth, I do believe in God, make no mistake about it, but religion is merely a man made process of how we connect with God, and that is mostly ****ed and see the results, its not pretty, we got people murdering each other because of it, we got people following stupid and ******ed rituals and beliefs because of it and we got so much division on this planet because of it. I do believe in God, but I think religion is ****ing Evil.
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Is this Seth Joo part two?
I do not think non Asian women look down on non Asian men, I think that many Asian men lack confidence in approaching non Asian women, that is the problem. Ever heard of the Six Pack Shortcuts guy? Him and his partner seem to date only non Asian women, mostly white, both of them are shorter than me, but they date a lot of beautiful non Asian women, so it indeed is possible. I think if you are into health and fitness, come across as masculine, its possible.
A lot of people in medical school tend to be fat, out of shape, and anti-social, but people in DO school tend to more well rounded compared to MD school. I am not a cookie cutter medical student in that I keep in good shape, generally considered to be good looking, and sociable.
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My ex-bf is Persian. I was told by his mother that I have corrupted her only male child. She told me that we will never be together and the relationship will never last, not over her dead body.
Granted, we broke up because he went to med school across the country...but I would be lying if I said his parents didn't have any part in that decision. Last I checked they were going to pay for his entire education. So I'm pretty certain that when it came down to picking me or picking free schooling, he picked school.
I'm not mad. I would do the same.
What hurts so bad is that I was so in loved with him. And what's even crazier is that even though we broke up for 2 years now, I still feel like I'm always his and every time I hear about him or when we have small talk when he's home, I get weak and I can't resist. I hate myself so much for that. Having not heard from him for so long and then seeing his face or hear his voice, brings me right back to square one.
Granted, we broke up because he went to med school across the country...but I would be lying if I said his parents didn't have any part in that decision. Last I checked they were going to pay for his entire education. So I'm pretty certain that when it came down to picking me or picking free schooling, he picked school.
I'm not mad. I would do the same.
What hurts so bad is that I was so in loved with him. And what's even crazier is that even though we broke up for 2 years now, I still feel like I'm always his and every time I hear about him or when we have small talk when he's home, I get weak and I can't resist. I hate myself so much for that. Having not heard from him for so long and then seeing his face or hear his voice, brings me right back to square one.
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Twinkie reference. Stems back to the 70s when people called blacks who pursued higher education Oreos.
I am Japanese American and my parents, particularly my mother strongly disapprove of my white girlfriend, I was previously married to a Korean American women who they had no problem with, racism is not confined only to whites. That being said, my parents are not paying for my medical school education or expenses so they cannot tell me who to date, and I do not live in Japan and the city I live in has few Asians anyway.
It is a ridiculous double standard that many of us who come from different backgrounds can openly state that we prefer to date or marry someone of the same race but if someone who is white ie of European ancestry openly says they prefer to marry another person of European ancestry, they are labeled a racist.
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That doesn't make sense based on the very definition of racist.
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I dated a Chinese international student for about two years. I visited her family summer of 2011 and her father gave me 10,000 rmb (about 1.5k usd) as "play" money. Naturally, I blew it all playing mahjong. Ultimately we parted ways in 2012 but our split had very little to do with religion/language/culture/race; if you spend enough time with a person these factors begin to matter less and less.
Fast forward two years, she contacted me via email with a pic informing me she married a person that looks pretty similar to me with my same name (identical spelling). Not sure how I feel about that.
Fast forward two years, she contacted me via email with a pic informing me she married a person that looks pretty similar to me with my same name (identical spelling). Not sure how I feel about that.
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Many of the Asian guys I know are dating white girls. It's certainly not some kind of impossibility.
I am an Asian guy and I date a white woman. Formerly was married to an Asian, the issue with Asian men dating white women has nothing to do with white women rejecting Asian men, its mostly Asian men not pursuing non Asian women, but put an Asian man in a situation where there are few Asian women and you will see them date other nationalities.
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I was raised Christian.
I'm a white Catholic who only dated white Catholics until I married my Indian Hindu husband. Well, Indian American. From Texas. More cowboy than Indian, as he says. We're fine. We're both MDs, so we get each other's culture if you will. I'm pregnant with our third child now. His family has been challenging to me, but now that they're on the other side of the country it's much better.
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My parents are different religions (Hindu and Catholic, though non-practicing), different races (Indian and North European descent), different social backgrounds (1st generation immigrant versus 4th generation in same state), with different educational backgrounds (Multi generation college grad versus first generation higher ed). They have been together 35 years, married 30 years. The only thing they have in common is political views (Democrats) and going to the same college (where they met). Works for them, and I see lots of the extended family on both sides, with cousins across the spectrum. Definitely gives me a broader perspective on different values, though I'm definitely less tolerant of bigotry.
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For me, race/ethnicity is not an issue. If I were to start dating with the purpose of settling down, marriage, kids and all that ish, I suspect religion would be a significant issue for me since I am an atheist. The only way (that I can think of) for it to not be an issue is if she lacks the expectation that our kids should believe in God.
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That's actually hilarious because I've found it to be the exact opposite. Every time I get close to dating an Asian guy, I get the cold shoulder because they all know their mothers would never want them to be with a white girl, especially not a fiery redhead type. Traditional Asians are racist as hell. I've had prior love interests describe to me the "tiers" of Asian races. Many things seem to be about status as well. I probably dodged some bullets avoiding all of that xD.
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I'm currently exploring a relationship with a Chinese girl atm. Double whammy--she's not the same faith.
She's perfect in every way though. My biggest concern with us is that we will prob do the couples match now. AHHHHHHHHHHHH.
She's perfect in every way though. My biggest concern with us is that we will prob do the couples match now. AHHHHHHHHHHHH.
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lol
I haven't dealt with any religious issues; Cultural beliefs and lifestyles aren't problematic for me since I'm pretty outgoing and open minded I'd like to say. I've dated all kinds of different races though (mostly white females though).
Do you guys tend to date people within a medical profession or no? I know some people don't like the idea of their women to work, but I think you could have a very healthy relationship if both partners worked in a similar field. Sure you both would be working quite a bit as medical doctors/professionals however, your income is stable enough to provide for a healthy family and it's easier to relate to each other's stress, etc.
Do you guys tend to date people within a medical profession or no? I know some people don't like the idea of their women to work, but I think you could have a very healthy relationship if both partners worked in a similar field. Sure you both would be working quite a bit as medical doctors/professionals however, your income is stable enough to provide for a healthy family and it's easier to relate to each other's stress, etc.
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I'm a non-religious latina and is very difficult being in a relationship with other latinos because most are very very religious :'(
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I got married outside of my race. I am black and he is white. His mother hated my guts because of the color of my skin. He is a strong man who has my back always. We did not go for thanksgiving for several years because she refused to invite me. At the end of the day I was the one who cared for her at my home during her cancer treatment. I did this with love. Bitterness is too unhealthy for me. I am saying this to point out that people must be careful as to the way they treat others. One never knows. Love is all we need.
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cellsaver
My husband is white, his family is white red neck material (they call themselves that) and I am not white.
It has been difficult because of his family but he left home at age 17 precisely because he rejected the good ol white boy fake story, and pursued me because of my ethnicity and culture...and my beautiful smile.
Our marriage is solid, his mother now asks about me and I invited her to visit us, several states away. She probably will never visit but as you wrote, love is the glue. The rest is just noise
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In an interracial marriage.
Marrying across racial lines can be very eye opening - there a lot of differences in how things are done and general acceptances of "normal"
Marrying across religious lines, as many have alluded to, is a lot trickier. As a devout Christian, marrying outside my religion was out of the question. Because religion is so fundamental to one's worldview, it is a greater source of conflict, eventually resulting in one partner giving in, and usually not the less devout one.
Marrying across racial lines can be very eye opening - there a lot of differences in how things are done and general acceptances of "normal"
Marrying across religious lines, as many have alluded to, is a lot trickier. As a devout Christian, marrying outside my religion was out of the question. Because religion is so fundamental to one's worldview, it is a greater source of conflict, eventually resulting in one partner giving in, and usually not the less devout one.
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I've dated a half Japanese/half Italian, a Scottish, a few Russians, and a few mixed "white" people. I'm Indian, but an ABCD.
My family (my parents and siblings) are relatively more modern and less conservative than the parents of my friends (they are mostly family friends). I was able to date openly from a younger age whereas my friends are still expected to go to school, become a doctor and jump into the married phase of their life.
Even though my parents are still more open minded and we've lived in Canada for more than 15 years, there's definitely a culture barrier - even in smaller things such as language or jokes, food, bringing a SO to a party, etc.
Of course there are exceptions to the rule and your SO can definitely fit in, it does require more of an effort on everyone's part to bridge that divide.
My family (my parents and siblings) are relatively more modern and less conservative than the parents of my friends (they are mostly family friends). I was able to date openly from a younger age whereas my friends are still expected to go to school, become a doctor and jump into the married phase of their life.
Even though my parents are still more open minded and we've lived in Canada for more than 15 years, there's definitely a culture barrier - even in smaller things such as language or jokes, food, bringing a SO to a party, etc.
Of course there are exceptions to the rule and your SO can definitely fit in, it does require more of an effort on everyone's part to bridge that divide.
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I have dated outside of my race before. People tend to stare at us when we are holding hands. It doesn't bother us. His family does not speak to me much but I know he loves me and that's all that matters.
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Interesting Thread. I think interracial dating is fairly accepted these days no matter where you are located and I live in the South. You might turn a few heads down here but nobody really cares. My "one that got away" was mixed AA and white. I would have married her if things had worked out differently. Anyway, I say if you meet someone from another race that knocks your socks off, go for it. Don't let something like that stop you. Who cares what people think.
Hello Brittany24,
I am in the same situation as you and that Arab guy was in, except I come from a Turkish background, and my girlfriend is German. We have been dating for more than 2 years now. We are in a long distance relationship (I live in USA, and she lives in Germany) My parents want me to marry a Turkish girl, and whenever I tried to tell them, or get a sense of what they think of me marrying another nationality, i found out that they were strongly against it. My mom said that they would disown me, or if I did something like that, her heart may not be able to handle it. When your parents say things like that, it becomes extremely difficult to reveal your relationship, and it has effected me mentally, physically and academically. It has also been really hard on my girlfriend because she thinks if I choose her, she needs to be perfect because I left my parents for her, but I do not expect that from her, and I told her that, and I hope she doesn't still think that way.
The reason I am still in this relationship is because I love my girlfriend, and I refuse to believe that my parents can control my future. I try to defy them however I can. However, I would feel extremely guilty if something happened to them because of my decisions.
I am really lost, and I don't know what to do...
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cellsaver
Guess who's coming to dinner? My mother-in-law told my husband she wants to visit us in the summer for a week, maybe two. He told me yesterday, "she always asks about you". So there ya go. it happens.
Now I need to pay the witch doctor for all of the needles he's been sticking in his voodoo doll ...and there were quite a few needles I ordered!
Now I need to pay the witch doctor for all of the needles he's been sticking in his voodoo doll ...and there were quite a few needles I ordered!
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Really? You are too funny.
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Fascinating thread!!!
I've dated Chinese, Italian, Puerto Rican, and Canadian gals, and ended up marrying a good Methodist, show how secular I am.
The Chinese gal dumped me on her parent's orders.
I have plenty of students who date and marry across cultures and religions.
I think I read something very recently on the Web (Time.com maybe) that showed that Asian American women are most likely to marry across ethnic lines.
I've dated Chinese, Italian, Puerto Rican, and Canadian gals, and ended up marrying a good Methodist, show how secular I am.
The Chinese gal dumped me on her parent's orders.
I have plenty of students who date and marry across cultures and religions.
I think I read something very recently on the Web (Time.com maybe) that showed that Asian American women are most likely to marry across ethnic lines.
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Ok here I go! I am southeast asian, raised muslim but now identify as non religious. My gf is mixed (1/4 black, 1/4 asian, 1/2 italian). We've been dating for more than 3 years and have definitely grown from it. We used to have a lot of culture classes in the beginning because we had different ideals but stayed in the long haul. My gf definitely has issues with my family that looks down on any other culture other than theirs but have slowly over time come to accept her. Cross cultural relationships can be hard but they're definitely worth it.
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I am actually the opposite with my girlfriend. She is in the humanities while I'm into medicine. I think it really helps because she calms me down and I not stressed out when I am with her. She introduces me to new perspectives too.
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This looks like a fun thread. My father is a Darazi "Arab" Palestinian immigrant and my mother is Mexican American. My wife's mother is a German immigrant who is catholic and her father is a Black American who is baptist. I typically only dated mixed race/ethnicity women in the past, idk if it was because of what I was attracted to or what. I dated one european descent white girl in the past and that ended horribly because her family hated my family and vice-versa and I never tried that again. Religion has never been a problem for me though, the Druze are pretty rare and I never really had to talk about it.
My father is a Darazi "Arab" Palestinian immigrant and my mother is Mexican American. My wife's mother is a German immigrant who is catholic and her father is a Black American who is baptist. I typically only dated mixed race/ethnicity women in the past, idk if it was because of what I was attracted to or what. I dated one european descent white girl in the past and that ended horribly because her family hated my family and vice-versa and I never tried that again. Religion has never been a problem for me though, the Druze are pretty rare and I never really had to talk about it.
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grapefruit17
My first two years of medical school I was insanely attracted to Indian girls (white guy here). My college experience mainly consisted of dating in my own race so I guess I developed a different type. I ended up dating one Indian girl which was great, but she could not tell her parents about me because I'm Caucasian. So yeah, I said forget that and we broke it off.
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I know my Palestinian father would have been furious at me if I were in your situation when I was younger. Now that we're both older, he probably wouldn't mind. Although he has often said that he would much more prefer them be mizrahi or sephardi if I were to have dated one.
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cellsaver
One of my closest friends is an Orthodox Jew (ER physician). He married a Latina, Catholic and she is very very dominant. They get along just fine with each practicing neither religion but believing in both Faiths. Neither now go to Temple/Mass. The holidays are really interesting at their home but they are very much in love.
Blessings!
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I'm Jewish and my boyfriend is Catholic. He isn't devout, so it's not really a problem. I feel like we have the same values despite coming from different religious backgrounds. We've been together for a while. I think the only time this becomes a big problem is when people are deciding what they want to raise their children as. Personally, I'm for exposing my future kids to different religions (my religion and my SO's), but letting them make their own choices about what they believe. The guy I'm with now has this same belief. Some people are dead set on having their kids practice their religion until they're 18 (not necessarily anything wrong with that), but I think it's a conversation that needs to be had if the person your in a serious relationship with is very religious. I was in a relationship with another guy in college (short-term, like 2/3 months) that ended when he found out I was Jewish. He was very Christian (father was a preacher or something). To some people it's important, but to others it's not. The point is that it depends on the people involved whether it will work, but that it definitely can.
As far as race goes, I also dated someone who was half Indian. Never was an issue.
As far as race goes, I also dated someone who was half Indian. Never was an issue.
D
deleted480308
If neither go to temple or mass they don’t really “practice” their religion in the sense of being devout
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I don't think religion and race should be barriers to date someone but people selectively choose based on attributes like these. Personally, if I connected with someone, I wouldn't mind what they're religion or race was and I hope they would have the same feelings also.
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Yeah its hard to date people who are brainwashed into either political party. I could never date a republican or a democrat.
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I'm a white woman dating a Korean American guy for over 6 years. The only problem I really have with the culture difference is that I can't communicate well with his mom, dad, and extended family because they all speak almost exclusively Korean. We all still get along and like each other. We visited Korea recently and I had a great time with his grandma even though we couldn't communicate at all. It can be done I suppose
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Disagree. Some of the most devout Catholics I've known were the ones that didn't attend mass, while some of the most sinful were the ones that went multiple times a week. Keeping to the texts and teachings is what makes one devout, not how much time you spend in a building.
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deleted480308
with the exception that the text says go to the building
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*citation needed
It says you should be in fellowship with other believers, not to go to a particular building, iirc
