RANT HERE thread

Veterinary Science Graduate Certificate from UofI
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My boss lady. :mad:

She wrote a terrible letter for my ex-coworker's application. She doesn't do anything with computers so we had to enter it into VMCAS for her. She just talks **** the entire time, and it's not even accurate ****. It's terrible and I can't believe she would actually write a letter like that. I'm just :mad::mad:
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PrincessButterCup said:
My boss lady. :mad:

She wrote a terrible letter for my ex-coworker's application. She doesn't do anything with computers so we had to enter it into VMCAS for her. She just talks **** the entire time, and it's not even accurate ****. It's terrible and I can't believe she would actually write a letter like that. I'm just :mad::mad:
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Oh my gosh. :( what a b****
 
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PrincessButterCup said:
My boss lady. :mad:

She wrote a terrible letter for my ex-coworker's application. She doesn't do anything with computers so we had to enter it into VMCAS for her. She just talks **** the entire time, and it's not even accurate ****. It's terrible and I can't believe she would actually write a letter like that. I'm just :mad::mad:
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That's so awful :(
 
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WhtsThFrequency said:
My dad had terrible repeating post-ictal psychosis in his last months along with brain damage from years of alcohol abuse. He was so anxious and delusional that mom couldn't even leave him alone to go to the grocery store without hiring a sitter, and whenever he had to go to the hospital it spiraled into actual hostility. I felt horrible for her (and yours) too....I wouldn't wish that type of caregiving on my worst enemy.
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That is so awful. :( I guess we're "lucky" that grandma is rather frail and can't walk more than a few steps. She has started throwing things, but she'll mostly just throw them on the floor and not at people. I'm glad we at least don't have to worry about her walking around the house when she's having her hallucinations.

But, yeah, it really is a special kind of terrible, especially when you can't leave the house. My mother is the only one who can really take care of her at this point. My dad used to help but she was extra super hostile with him, so they decided it was best that he not see her unless it was necessary. When I visit, my mom and I will leave the house for an hour or two, but she's constantly thinking about grandma and worrying about getting back. We can't even tell her that mom is leaving the house. She used to just panic and get anxious if mom left the house, but now it's that plus a torrent of abuse. They tried having a family friend who used to be a CNA keep an eye on her once when my brother got married, and that was before she was so frequently abusive. Even then, it didn't go so well. She's extremely distrustful of other people and only speaks Spanish, so the options are limited for getting help. And since she's ineligible for Medicare, it's a nightmare to deal with it all. I worry about my mom all the time. Like you said, wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Putting up with all of that and then feeling guilty when you're not putting up with it.
 
WhtsThFrequency said:
My dad had terrible repeating post-ictal psychosis in his last months along with brain damage from years of alcohol abuse. He was so anxious and delusional that mom couldn't even leave him alone to go to the grocery store without hiring a sitter, and whenever he had to go to the hospital it spiraled into actual hostility. I felt horrible for her (and yours) too....I wouldn't wish that type of caregiving on my worst enemy.
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missdarjeeling said:
That is so awful. :( I guess we're "lucky" that grandma is rather frail and can't walk more than a few steps. She has started throwing things, but she'll mostly just throw them on the floor and not at people. I'm glad we at least don't have to worry about her walking around the house when she's having her hallucinations.

But, yeah, it really is a special kind of terrible, especially when you can't leave the house. My mother is the only one who can really take care of her at this point. My dad used to help but she was extra super hostile with him, so they decided it was best that he not see her unless it was necessary. When I visit, my mom and I will leave the house for an hour or two, but she's constantly thinking about grandma and worrying about getting back. We can't even tell her that mom is leaving the house. She used to just panic and get anxious if mom left the house, but now it's that plus a torrent of abuse. They tried having a family friend who used to be a CNA keep an eye on her once when my brother got married, and that was before she was so frequently abusive. Even then, it didn't go so well. She's extremely distrustful of other people and only speaks Spanish, so the options are limited for getting help. And since she's ineligible for Medicare, it's a nightmare to deal with it all. I worry about my mom all the time. Like you said, wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Putting up with all of that and then feeling guilty when you're not putting up with it.
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My grandpa has Alzheimer's. He was in the Navy then was a fireman and in his 'retirement' he worked at the racetrack and as the fire supervisor on movie sets. He worked until the day he got his diagnosis. Physically he's in great condition so that makes it even harder. My grandma kept him at home for longer than she should've and it took him doing some really crazy things before my mom stepped in and was like look, he really needs to go to a home now. As an example, he got up in the middle of the night and was cold so he turned on the gas burners in the kitchen and went back to bed. It was at least a few hours before my grandma realized it.

At first I had a really hard time seeing him in a home but we had him moved to a better one specifically for dementia and Alzheimer's and he seems pretty ok with it. They give him 'jobs' since he was a workaholic for so many years and it's such a huge relief to know he's in a place under constant supervision so he can't hurt himself or someone else. It was hard for my grandma at first but now (it's been like 9 months) she's so relieved - she's not living with the constant stress of worrying and can focus on herself because her health is important too.

As hard as it is to see a loved one go into a home, if it's financially possible it can be the best thing for them AND the caregiver.
 
Apparently a family member who I'm very close got rear ended recently at 50 mph. He had a concussion, including brain swelling and eye trauma as well. None of my other family members thought to let me know, which is problem number uno, because yeah that's actually a pretty big thing, and it would be nice to guys thanks. Second problem, person who caused the accident was playing pokemon go. My anger and frustration at them is just like...wow. I mean I don't care about the fact that this person wants to put themselves at risk, that's all on them, whatever, go get hurt. But to be that selfish that you injure other people as well, wow. I mean I'm just blown away at this entire thing. Using phones in general to do what? It's never worth it. So my family member now has to go to neuro appointments, be in lots of SERIOUS pain, all because you had to catch one stupid pokemon. Really? THAT was worth it? The RISK of doing that was worth it?
I mean I'm generally a super stable and not too emotional of a person, but I'm so mad at this.
 
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EngrSC said:
My grandpa has Alzheimer's. He was in the Navy then was a fireman and in his 'retirement' he worked at the racetrack and as the fire supervisor on movie sets. He worked until the day he got his diagnosis. Physically he's in great condition so that makes it even harder. My grandma kept him at home for longer than she should've and it took him doing some really crazy things before my mom stepped in and was like look, he really needs to go to a home now. As an example, he got up in the middle of the night and was cold so he turned on the gas burners in the kitchen and went back to bed. It was at least a few hours before my grandma realized it.

At first I had a really hard time seeing him in a home but we had him moved to a better one specifically for dementia and Alzheimer's and he seems pretty ok with it. They give him 'jobs' since he was a workaholic for so many years and it's such a huge relief to know he's in a place under constant supervision so he can't hurt himself or someone else. It was hard for my grandma at first but now (it's been like 9 months) she's so relieved - she's not living with the constant stress of worrying and can focus on herself because her health is important too.

As hard as it is to see a loved one go into a home, if it's financially possible it can be the best thing for them AND the caregiver.
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I totally agree. Just like those with physical ailments, people with cognitive dysfunction get to a point where it's best that professionals take over their care. In our case, it's unfortunately not an option. My grandma's on a special charity healthcare program with all of the bureaucracy that entails. She's not eligible for Medicare. My parents are both retired and on Social Security, and they can't afford to pay for her to live at a nursing home out of pocket. Without insurance or Medicare, it's prohibitively expensive. So we're basically stuck. I don't really want to go into any more detail, but it's a very sh-tty situation, and we've been looking for alternatives for some time to no avail. It'd be like Christmas morning to me if the social worker called and said they could put her in a home.
 
Petty rant.

It's my birthday and I just spent 11 hours at the hospital (vet, for clinics). Meaning I am very late for the weekly game night, but I warned people I would be late.

Tell them I'm off and heading home, no response. Thirty minutes later I arrive home, the bfs dog is barking like a maniac, and everyone stays in the basement continuing the game they started without me.

Couldn't stop for a couple minutes to come up and say hi, happy birthday, sorry you had a relatively long day compared to what we all work???

To top it off my dog was outside, unattended, for who knows how long. I've been home for twenty minutes and still no one has even bothered to yell hi up the stairs at me

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I just submitted my first set of applications.

I feel like I just threw a bunch of money in the trash.
 
kcoughli said:
Petty rant.

It's my birthday and I just spent 11 hours at the hospital (vet, for clinics). Meaning I am very late for the weekly game night, but I warned people I would be late.

Tell them I'm off and heading home, no response. Thirty minutes later I arrive home, the bfs dog is barking like a maniac, and everyone stays in the basement continuing the game they started without me.

Couldn't stop for a couple minutes to come up and say hi, happy birthday, sorry you had a relatively long day compared to what we all work???

To top it off my dog was outside, unattended, for who knows how long. I've been home for twenty minutes and still no one has even bothered to yell hi up the stairs at me

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SDN would yell up the stairs to you! We'd even dish you some ice cream.


Edit* There was a David Tennant gif but he's not working. Hold on.


Edit**

Doctor 2.gif


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katashark said:
Oh my gosh. :( what a b****
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Caiter92 said:
That's so awful :(
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This woman. :arghh: Our other vet is also writing a letter for my friend, so hopefully that will help even things out and give a better picture of her actual work ethic and capability. But still. The letter my boss wrote is 100% BS and what's almost worse, I'm sure she's really proud of herself.


One of the techs who was training me in the lab last week was asking me about what hospital I work for. I told her, and she said "Ooooh you work with the crazy doctor!" :laugh: Even the techs in the diagnostic lab know about boss lady. :rolleyes:
 
Heh thanks everyone. My night has not improved much and I'm up far too late and have homework to do but I appreciate all your kindness and support :)
 
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Happy birthday, kcough! I'm sorry you had a bad night :( hugs and I hope you can do something fun later!
 
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PrincessButterCup said:
This woman. :arghh: Our other vet is also writing a letter for my friend, so hopefully that will help even things out and give a better picture of her actual work ethic and capability. But still. The letter my boss wrote is 100% BS and what's almost worse, I'm sure she's really proud of herself.


One of the techs who was training me in the lab last week was asking me about what hospital I work for. I told her, and she said "Ooooh you work with the crazy doctor!" :laugh: Even the techs in the diagnostic lab know about boss lady. :rolleyes:
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So I have a classmate who I think lives across the street from your clinic. She was telling me how she was so excited to find out there was a clinic so close when she moved in, but then was promptly told by everyone once she did not to go there cause one of the vets is crazy haha

Hopefully the school takes that into account when they get that letter. That's just so terrible. I can understand (sort of?) her writing maybe a subpar letter if she didn't like the person (which is still awful and she shouldn't have agreed if that was the case), but to just straight up lie is ridiculous and plain cruel.

Now that you have the lab job, are you going to be able to quit the clinic job? Your boss just sounds awful :(
 
Caiter92 said:
So I have a classmate who I think lives across the street from your clinic. She was telling me how she was so excited to find out there was a clinic so close when she moved in, but then was promptly told by everyone once she did not to go there cause one of the vets is crazy haha

Hopefully the school takes that into account when they get that letter. That's just so terrible. I can understand (sort of?) her writing maybe a subpar letter if she didn't like the person (which is still awful and she shouldn't have agreed if that was the case), but to just straight up lie is ridiculous and plain cruel.

Now that you have the lab job, are you going to be able to quit the clinic job? Your boss just sounds awful :(
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I'm only 10 hours a week at the lab. I'm going to try and hold out through Christmas and quit before the new year begins, because it'll be easier to look for a new part time job after this class is over and my schedule becomes a little more open. I'm working mostly mornings now so I only see my boss once or twice a week. If I worked with her more, like I did summer, I would definitely quit now and save myself the stress.
 
kcoughli said:
Petty rant.

It's my birthday and I just spent 11 hours at the hospital (vet, for clinics). Meaning I am very late for the weekly game night, but I warned people I would be late.

Tell them I'm off and heading home, no response. Thirty minutes later I arrive home, the bfs dog is barking like a maniac, and everyone stays in the basement continuing the game they started without me.

Couldn't stop for a couple minutes to come up and say hi, happy birthday, sorry you had a relatively long day compared to what we all work???

To top it off my dog was outside, unattended, for who knows how long. I've been home for twenty minutes and still no one has even bothered to yell hi up the stairs at me

Sent from my VS876 using SDN mobile
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Not petty at all. Because of how my school's distributive model works I got to spend my second birthday in a row 100% alone, except this year all of my American family members except for my mum forgot about it and actually still haven't even said anything (it was in July). This was after spending 10 hours at a clinic where I felt like no one really wanted to deal with the fourth year vet student that had to be there. I felt petty complaining about it, but honestly, I don't think it's too much to ask to have people say "happy birthday!" on the one day a year that's yours after a crappy day.

That being said, happy birthday! Hope your night improved!
 
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Kcoughli - Happy Birthday again! :hardy:

RW- Happy very belated birthday to you too!:)

My family (mom) forgot my birthday all the time when I was a kid and went out of the way to make sure my siblings birthdays were great, so I am a bit obsessed with making sure people at least remember it is my birthday. I don't care if they don't do anything (except my husband, mandatory dinner or easter egg hunt), but I want acknowledged. It stinks to have it seemingly forgotten by everybody.:unsure:
 
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missdarjeeling said:
I totally agree. Just like those with physical ailments, people with cognitive dysfunction get to a point where it's best that professionals take over their care. In our case, it's unfortunately not an option. My grandma's on a special charity healthcare program with all of the bureaucracy that entails. She's not eligible for Medicare. My parents are both retired and on Social Security, and they can't afford to pay for her to live at a nursing home out of pocket. Without insurance or Medicare, it's prohibitively expensive. So we're basically stuck. I don't really want to go into any more detail, but it's a very sh-tty situation, and we've been looking for alternatives for some time to no avail. It'd be like Christmas morning to me if the social worker called and said they could put her in a home.
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I'm sorry :( I can't even imagine. Just do your best with what you've got
 
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kaydubs said:
Too many pets at home. I miss just having my cat. Today I'm nursing a sore jaw, several sore teeth and my neck, head and back are all effed up. Stupid sister's dog needed to try and break my jaw last night :punch::hurting:
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Omg what did the dog do??
 
Ugh. Screw today, seriously. The stress and feelings of inadequacy have been piling up pretty much since school started but today it's culminated past my breaking point. Left anatomy lab feeling the tears well up, but they didn't start spilling over until two girls I've never seen before (assuming they're friends of the roommate, who was nowhere in sight) in my apartment decided to laugh and make stupid, petty, insulting comments about me right outside my bedroom door... in that typical snobby undergrad way. I say hi and introduce myself to try to be nice, even though you don't do the same, and that's what I get? It's a comparatively small deal and it normally wouldn't have bothered me much, but with all of the school stuff on top, it sent me over the edge. And I feel all the more pathetic for it because we're only TWO weeks in.

I'm admittedly a bit overly sensitive anyway, but I don't understand why people can't just be nice to each other. I feel like I'm having a difficult enough time making friends and feeling comfortable here; that crap just makes it so much worse. :(

Oh, and I'm sick. There's that, too.

At least I'm going home tomorrow for the long weekend...
 
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My heart hurts for you @SandstormDVM. You're amazing, you made it to vet school! Those girls are weak and insecure otherwise they wouldn't be making insulting comments about you. Take a breath, do something to relieve the stress, and enjoy your weekend! :biglove:
 
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Caiter92 said:
Hopefully the school takes that into account when they get that letter. That's just so terrible. I can understand (sort of?) her writing maybe a subpar letter if she didn't like the person (which is still awful and she shouldn't have agreed if that was the case), but to just straight up lie is ridiculous and plain cruel.
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Seriously. As someone who is trying her best to write an awesome letter for an applicant as we speak, the idea that someone would put that much time and effort into putting someone down with a bad one is just appalling.
 
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SandstormDVM said:
Ugh. Screw today, seriously. The stress and feelings of inadequacy have been piling up pretty much since school started but today it's culminated past my breaking point. Left anatomy lab feeling the tears well up, but they didn't start spilling over until two girls I've never seen before (assuming they're friends of the roommate, who was nowhere in sight) in my apartment decided to laugh and make stupid, petty, insulting comments about me right outside my bedroom door... in that typical snobby undergrad way. I say hi and introduce myself to try to be nice, even though you don't do the same, and that's what I get? It's a comparatively small deal and it normally wouldn't have bothered me much, but with all of the school stuff on top, it sent me over the edge. And I feel all the more pathetic for it because we're only TWO weeks in.

I'm admittedly a bit overly sensitive anyway, but I don't understand why people can't just be nice to each other. I feel like I'm having a difficult enough time making friends and feeling comfortable here; that crap just makes it so much worse. :(

Oh, and I'm sick. There's that, too.

At least I'm going home tomorrow for the long weekend...
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Wow. What bitches. That's the sort of stuff kids do in elementary school.
 
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I'm so sorry sandstorm :( Agree with what EngrSC said. Some people are just dinguses, and most of the time those people have their own issues. If you ever need to talk we are here for you, and my PM box in particular is always open. Try not to let it ruin your weekend :)
 
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jmo1012 said:
Why yes internet company, I would be happy to wait until Thursday for you to send someone out to evaluate the service that's been out since Saturday night, and be even happier to hear you can't give me a time frame, just before 6pm. I totally wanted to just hang around my house all day on my day off.
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That is so frustrating ... and applies to nearly every single contractor or service technician nowadays. I don't mind waiting ... because I (respectfully) acknowledge that others' time is as valuable as mine, but (please) provide me with a 3-hour window, and don't compel me to stay in my home for 8-12 hours - and please don't be a "no show."
 
Pugsforlove2014 said:
Apparently a family member who I'm very close got rear ended recently at 50 mph. He had a concussion, including brain swelling and eye trauma as well. None of my other family members thought to let me know, which is problem number uno, because yeah that's actually a pretty big thing, and it would be nice to guys thanks. Second problem, person who caused the accident was playing pokemon go. My anger and frustration at them is just like...wow. I mean I don't care about the fact that this person wants to put themselves at risk, that's all on them, whatever, go get hurt. But to be that selfish that you injure other people as well, wow. I mean I'm just blown away at this entire thing. Using phones in general to do what? It's never worth it. So my family member now has to go to neuro appointments, be in lots of SERIOUS pain, all because you had to catch one stupid pokemon. Really? THAT was worth it? The RISK of doing that was worth it?
I mean I'm generally a super stable and not too emotional of a person, but I'm so mad at this.
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Very sorry to hear about this (preventable) accident - an accident that never should have happened in the first place.

I hope your family member begins to feel better and has a healthy recovery.
 
lol Comcast. I set up an appointment for installation, but then we realized that there is in fact a coax cable in the apartment. It was just in one of the closets, and we didn't notice at first. So I set up our modem and called them to activate service. At the end of the call, the guy confirmed that our appointment to have someone come out for installation was canceled. What do I get on the first bill? A $60 charge for installation. :smack:

@SandstormDVM , sorry to hear those people were being jerks. It really does eat away at you when it's piled on top of all the work and stress, and it sucks that you're also feeling sick. Try your best to ignore and forget those people. Lots of people who are technically adults are still in the process of growing up, and some go their whole lives without figuring out how to be decent, kind people. It's okay to feel overwhelmed at this point, even if it's "only" 2 weeks in. We're all still adjusting, so being only 2 weeks in is probably more challenging than being 6 weeks in or 10 weeks in. You'll make friends - good friends - in time and you'll get into the swing of things as far as the work is concerned. You can handle this even if it often feels like you can't. Many before you have done it, and you can, too. I hope you can take at least some of the weekend to rest and relax and get your bearings. Take care of yourself. It's especially important since you're sick. Hope you feel better!
 
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SandstormDVM said:
Ugh. Screw today, seriously. The stress and feelings of inadequacy have been piling up pretty much since school started but today it's culminated past my breaking point. Left anatomy lab feeling the tears well up, but they didn't start spilling over until two girls I've never seen before (assuming they're friends of the roommate, who was nowhere in sight) in my apartment decided to laugh and make stupid, petty, insulting comments about me right outside my bedroom door... in that typical snobby undergrad way. I say hi and introduce myself to try to be nice, even though you don't do the same, and that's what I get? It's a comparatively small deal and it normally wouldn't have bothered me much, but with all of the school stuff on top, it sent me over the edge. And I feel all the more pathetic for it because we're only TWO weeks in.

I'm admittedly a bit overly sensitive anyway, but I don't understand why people can't just be nice to each other. I feel like I'm having a difficult enough time making friends and feeling comfortable here; that crap just makes it so much worse. :(

Oh, and I'm sick. There's that, too.

At least I'm going home tomorrow for the long weekend...
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I just wanted to let you know that I totally relate. First year is super stressful and you don't need that extra BS. I know part of what helped me when things were tough was I would tell myself "if I can make it through first year, I can make it through the next three." Once I was sure I successfully completed first year, I immediately started telling myself, "if I can make it through second year, I can make it through the next two." And I believe you can do it too.
 
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Doctor-S said:
That is so frustrating ... and applies to nearly every single contractor or service technician nowadays. I don't mind waiting ... because I (respectfully) acknowledge that others' time is as valuable as mine, but (please) provide me with a 3-hour window, and don't compel me to stay in my home for 8-12 hours - and please don't be a "no show."
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so i called this morning for a time frame and they guy told me not before 4p. i asked then if i could go run errands and he said yes that would be fine. decided to make lunch first and while i was eating, the actual repair guy calls and says he'll be there in 10 minutes. glad i wasn't out walking my dog like i had originally planned...dumb. also, the problem ended up being that the wiring to the box was severed outside (the homeowner installed some janky set up), likely by the lawnmower or weedwacker guy. easily fixed but seriously pay attention to what youre doing because i havent had internet in 5+ days secondary to a careless error.
 
Thank you so very much for the words of encouragement, everyone! I love this community and you all really are so, so sweet and kind. :biglove:

I cried in the bathroom for a while but then went out for a short run. I feel quite a bit better already! I'm really hoping having a four-day weekend helps me recharge and recuperate.

In retrospect, I think I probably should have waited another year before applying. I suspect that I was dangerously close to burnout towards the end of undergrad. Last VMCAS cycle was kind of a "test run" as I sincerely believed that there was virtually zero chance of me being admitted anywhere with my crummy GPA--lo and behold, I recieved no rejections. I never could have imagined this happening. I mean, I was the girl who attempted suicide her senior year of high school because I was close to failing out and not recieving a diploma; I thought I had no future (obviously now I see that there are alternative routes, but 18-year-olds aren't usually the most forward-thinking). I thought that there was no way I could ever get into college or find a halfway decent job... and now I'm in vet school! Craziness.

I guess I just have to remind myself that of the 1000ish applications my school recieved, and the 350ish interviewed, I somehow managed to stand out and that I am here because the school truly believes that I CAN make it.

I am happy--and grateful--to be here. That's why my feeling the way that I do frustrates me so much.
 
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SandstormDVM said:
Thank you so very much for the words of encouragement, everyone! I love this community and you all really are so, so sweet and kind. :biglove:

I cried in the bathroom for a while but then went out for a short run. I feel quite a bit better already! I'm really hoping having a four-day weekend helps me recharge and recuperate.

In retrospect, I think I probably should have waited another year before applying. I suspect that I was dangerously close to burnout towards the end of undergrad. Last VMCAS cycle was kind of a "test run" as I sincerely believed that there was virtually zero chance of me being admitted anywhere with my crummy GPA--lo and behold, I recieved no rejections. I never could have imagined this happening. I mean, I was the girl who attempted suicide her senior year of high school because I was close to failing out and not recieving a diploma; I thought I had no future (obviously now I see that there are alternative routes, but 18-year-olds aren't usually the most forward-thinking). I thought that there was no way I could ever get into college or find a halfway decent job... and now I'm in vet school! Craziness.

I guess I just have to remind myself that of the 1000ish applications my school recieved, and the 350ish interviewed, I somehow managed to stand out and that I am here because the school truly believes that I CAN make it.

I am happy--and grateful--to be here. That's why my feeling the way that I do frustrates me so much.
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Definitely consider some on-going support system - take it from someone who did almost burn out in third year from constant overwork. Doesn't even have to be specific one-on-one therapy, could be a group thing. Or heck, even something less formal -->

Has anyone here read the book Every Other Thursday? It's sort of a chronicle of this group of women scientists/academics who formed an internal support group and how that helped them navigate everything from issues in work and academia to personal stuff. A bunch of faculty and residents here (mostly women but we had some dudes too) formed a similar club for a while, and it was one of the best things I have ever been a part of.

We called ourselves The Imposters Club. It was so refreshing to hear from other people that they had the same stressors as I did, especially people who I admired and thought "Wow, they have it all worked out, they can't possibly feel anxious or inadequate!". Hell, even the section head, who is a woman I look up to immensely and one of the toughest cookies I know, would talk about all of the difficulties she had corralling the "good old boys" club, how she struggled with feeling never "good enough" - and I mean, this is one baller lady, and she sometimes feels insecure as well, just like me! It was wonderful to have that group.
 
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WhtsThFrequency said:
Definitely consider some on-going support system - take it from someone who did almost burn out in third year from constant overwork. Doesn't even have to be specific one-on-one therapy, could be a group thing. Or heck, even something less formal -->

Has anyone here read the book Every Other Thursday? It's sort of a chronicle of this group of women scientists/academics who formed an internal support group and how that helped them navigate everything from issues in work and academia to personal stuff. A bunch of faculty and residents here (mostly women but we had some dudes too) formed a similar club for a while, and it was one of the best things I have ever been a part of.

We called ourselves The Imposters Club. It was so refreshing to hear from other people that they had the same stressors as I did, especially people who I admired and thought "Wow, they have it all worked out, they can't possibly feel anxious or inadequate!". Hell, even the section head, who is a woman I look up to immensely and one of the toughest cookies I know, would talk about all of the difficulties she had corralling the "good old boys" club, how she struggled with feeling never "good enough" - and I mean, this is one baller lady, and she sometimes feels insecure as well, just like me! It was wonderful to have that group.
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Sounds wonderful!

I was part of a Grad Students of Color program, and that had a few moments like that, but none were from my department, so difficult to relate to each other. (Especially because so many were ethnic studies or woman's lit or something else that seemed focused on "the struggle" more than just day to day living in a white man's world.)
 
DVMDream said:
Same, most of us are around if you ever need to vent...
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Ditto. As someone who was bullied incessantly throughout most of my early life for being "odd" or a "tomboy" or a "geek" (the latter of which having become strangely popular of late....I remember when I had kids throwing rocks at me on the playground because I played Magic: The Gathering and was obsessed with dinosaurs back in the 90s, nowadays it seems to be a thing) I know what people being mean/snobby to you feels like. Feck them, man.
 
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