When you've euthanized 50% of the patients you have seen and that was just before lunch....
I really want to adopt one of our research beagles
I really want to adopt one of our research beagles
Bite bite BITE!!!!
Being back in GP has made me desperately want a dog and SDN doesn't help and oh god I keep looking at shelters aaaaccckkkk. I told my partner that my ovaries want a puppy and he just laughed at me.
I'm going to a friend's wedding this weekend, leaving insanely early tomorrow morning. Before RSVPing to said wedding, I obtained approval to leave a little early this afternoon (in case I ended up booking an evening flight and/or to get my ducks in a row before leaving home at 3am). That was ~3 months ago. My schedule got switched around a bit this week, and I ended up on the small animal side for the end of this week. I get assigned a late day case, which is a surgeon's 5th procedure of the day (i.e. almost definitely going to go late). I let the scheduler know, hey, I need to cut out by 5 today, if this goes late, I need to go. I then get told off by my faculty who overheard this exchange, in the middle of the room, in front of like 10 people, to basically shut up, I'm a resident, and I'll work until 7 or whenever if it goes late, get used to it.
What the hell use is getting advanced approval then? I never would have made plans without approval, I'm doing a residency, you can't count on that. Apparently I can't make plans WITH prior approval either.
I just got home. I have to leave for the airport in <8 hours, I'm not packed, and everything in my apartment is still in disarray from working on-call most of the holiday weekend. I'm completely filthy from a horse case, I've been humiliated in front of a bunch of people I work with, and I still haven't come up with a way to tactfully/non-vindictively bring to said faculty's attention that I wasn't randomly trying to leave early, that this was arranged well in advance.
I was going to, but I'm still worried it's going to be seen as retaliatory. All I really want to point out is that I asked for this well in advance, nobody voiced a problem with it and the section chief said I was good to go, and that I don't think I was being unreasonable. Because I really don't think it's unreasonable to ask that a previous agreement be honored. Even if nobody else seems to remember that they agreed.
I wouldn't see it as retaliatory, but I don't know what your work/school environment is like.
I think I'm hesitating more after getting basically yelled at and told to shut up this morning. Usually this is a faculty member I'll just text about cases and stuff, but the mid-conversation berating I got this morning makes me worry about what lies under the surface.
I have absolutely no clout or anything to make my opinions on this matter, but that whole story you just told infuriates me. You're not "just a resident," you're a human being with a life and a need for work-life balance. You acted incredibly responsibly by requesting in advance to be able to leave "early" (5pm in the normal world is not early) and were approved to do so. You have a life outside of your job, and that just has to be okay.
She's confusing the bull now. Won't let him mount, but she wants on top.
Family's driving me crazy. I visited them this weekend. Made it crystal clear I'd have to leave early on Sunday so that I could spend some quality time with my cadaver and also actually find a parking spot near my apartment so I wouldn't have to walk home a longer distance in the dark with the dog and all of my crap.
Next Sunday, my SIL is throwing a party for my nephew's 1st birthday. She rented out a hall, and at least 70 people are going. That's how many I had at my wedding, but I digress. I told my brother I couldn't go because I need to be home early on Sundays, but of course, to him early means "any time up to 10 pm." He eventually just said that SIL is going to be very disappointed that I can't go. That's his subtle way of pressuring me, of course. Turns out my oldest brother is flying out of the country to see his girlfriend. And mom can't go because she has to take care of my invalid grandmother with dementia. So my brother threw a hissy fit and "it's BS that the only people who aren't going to be there are my family." He and my dad are insisting that it's okay to leave a 93 year old woman with dementia who can't really walk anymore all alone for 5-6 hours, and my mom won't budge. Even if my mom did leave grandma alone, she'd be worried the entire time. She also refuses to hire a certified home visit nurse for the night because "they're strangers and could steal things," even though people like that are bonded, licensed, and insured.
So the plan that they concocted was for me to go with my father driving 1.5 hours to get me and 1.5 hours to bring me to their house on Saturday. And then he'd drive me home after the party on Sunday. That way I wouldn't have to move my car. I said no. "You can study in the car." No. NO I CAN'T. This morning, that plan morphed into "he can come get you and you can take care of grandma so mom can go and you can study in the car and at home while you're taking care of grandma." Oh, even better! Much more conducive to studying. Nothing helps you concentrate like taking care of a person with dementia who's verbally abusive.
They fail to understand that I need to be in my apartment with all of my stuff in an environment where I can FOCUS and that I need to be able to run to the lab and meet up with classmates on short notice. Despite my repeated attempts to explain things, they still don't understand how much f-ing work I need to do and how distracting all of this is. How many hours of productive studying I lose (by choice, but it's a thing that still happens) whenever I visit. And I'm irritated at my brother for his continual emotional manipulation of everyone else in the family. He's mad at mom for not wanting to leave grandma alone because mom is going to miss this stupid freaking party. Nevermind that mom babysits the boy multiple times a week and just about every weekend. What's going to matter more in the long run? That she was there at a stupid party? Or that she's always there to take care of the baby when she's needed? Jesus Christ, people, come on.
Word of advice. "No." is a complete sentence. And quite frankly, a 1yr old isn't going to remember a party. The party isn't for him, it's for your SIL and brother to show off. You and your family have very legitimate reasons not to be at the party.Family's driving me crazy. I visited them this weekend. Made it crystal clear I'd have to leave early on Sunday so that I could spend some quality time with my cadaver and also actually find a parking spot near my apartment so I wouldn't have to walk home a longer distance in the dark with the dog and all of my crap.
Next Sunday, my SIL is throwing a party for my nephew's 1st birthday. She rented out a hall, and at least 70 people are going. That's how many I had at my wedding, but I digress. I told my brother I couldn't go because I need to be home early on Sundays, but of course, to him early means "any time up to 10 pm." He eventually just said that SIL is going to be very disappointed that I can't go. That's his subtle way of pressuring me, of course. Turns out my oldest brother is flying out of the country to see his girlfriend. And mom can't go because she has to take care of my invalid grandmother with dementia. So my brother threw a hissy fit and "it's BS that the only people who aren't going to be there are my family." He and my dad are insisting that it's okay to leave a 93 year old woman with dementia who can't really walk anymore all alone for 5-6 hours, and my mom won't budge. Even if my mom did leave grandma alone, she'd be worried the entire time. She also refuses to hire a certified home visit nurse for the night because "they're strangers and could steal things," even though people like that are bonded, licensed, and insured.
So the plan that they concocted was for me to go with my father driving 1.5 hours to get me and 1.5 hours to bring me to their house on Saturday. And then he'd drive me home after the party on Sunday. That way I wouldn't have to move my car. I said no. "You can study in the car." No. NO I CAN'T. This morning, that plan morphed into "he can come get you and you can take care of grandma so mom can go and you can study in the car and at home while you're taking care of grandma." Oh, even better! Much more conducive to studying. Nothing helps you concentrate like taking care of a person with dementia who's verbally abusive.
They fail to understand that I need to be in my apartment with all of my stuff in an environment where I can FOCUS and that I need to be able to run to the lab and meet up with classmates on short notice. Despite my repeated attempts to explain things, they still don't understand how much f-ing work I need to do and how distracting all of this is. How many hours of productive studying I lose (by choice, but it's a thing that still happens) whenever I visit. And I'm irritated at my brother for his continual emotional manipulation of everyone else in the family. He's mad at mom for not wanting to leave grandma alone because mom is going to miss this stupid freaking party. Nevermind that mom babysits the boy multiple times a week and just about every weekend. What's going to matter more in the long run? That she was there at a stupid party? Or that she's always there to take care of the baby when she's needed? Jesus Christ, people, come on.
We had a dog in heart failure intubated on oxygen and the family came back to say goodbye and potentially euthanize. The mother started to berate us for not taking him outside because he was clearly stressed because he hadn't been out to pee since he got there. I get that she was stressed, but she was also an RN.
Never give up, never surrender!!!
hope you feel better, w2vm!Still sick. Missing my first day of vet school
