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- Jan 27, 2013
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Sometimes my boyfriend and I think we're the defective ones when all of our couple-friends are constantly ripping each other to shreds and we've never had a fight fight before.
Anytime either one of us talks to a friend about their SO, some kinda drama's always going down.
We tease each other all the time, but I've never felt any semblance of the venom behind it like in the mean-nasty "teasing" our friends do.
One of my best friends yesterday actually told me I'm fooling myself if I think I'm in a "real relationship" if we never fight. Don't get me wrong, we definitely disagree and hash things out. I would just never call him stupid or treat him disrespectfully, because he's my favorite.
Ive had people say the same thing to me! Its like they believe we cannot function without fighting. There have been plenty of tense days but they always end with a civil sit down "this is why I'm upset....why are you upset?...etc". Maybe its because we are both quiet.
I have been in a relationship with my husband for 10 years now and I can't even remember the last time we yelled at each other. I know it has happened before - like 2-3 times total - but mostly we just get pissy and then don't talk for a bit. Usually it's only a few hours. And I can't even think of the last time that happened either. Maybe within the last six months? Maybe?
Now, this isn't to say that people that argue have crap relationships. There are all sorts of dynamics out there that relationships can have. If whatever you do works for you, then great. However, I don't understand the 'constant bickering and insults' method of maintaining a relationship. It seems like it would have to be detrimental.
Most of the people we know have been together for quite some time, too. I just could never ever handle the constant insulting and bickering. I couldnt ever view an SO the same after some of the things I've heard them say. idk. You're right. Too each their own if it works, I suppose.