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second guessing the school you picked?

Discussion in 'Psychology [Psy.D. / Ph.D.]' started by kd26, 03.22.12.

  1. kd26

    kd26

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    SDN Members don't see this ad. (About Ads)
    has anyone else had this experience?

    it feels pretty terrible. i debated between two for quite some time and eventually accepted one. now all i can think is that i made the wrong choice....
  2. 4410

    4410

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    Don't fret, it is human nature to be unhappy with life decisions. Buyers remorse happens to everyone. You are normal so just get up every day and keep on keeping on. Regardless of your decision there is no perfect program and each has pluses and minus.
  3. harlequin

    harlequin

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    Bummer that you're feeling this way about your decision. :( How long ago did you make it?

    I too had a really tough choice and, after thinking about it from every possible angle for way too long, the fear of going with the "wrong" school was making me miserable. I wrung everyone around me dry and still felt stuck so I finally went with my gut, impulsively pulled trig, wrote out my acceptance email, and hit send. Immediately following that moment my head flooded with every potential regret about my selection, and I felt sick to my little turncoat gut.

    Later, I felt MUCH, much better. It helped me to get and stay in touch with a graduate student I really liked while I was visiting, as well as to concentrate on everything I valued about the program and the area. I'm sure you made your choice in the first place for reasons that were important to you. Think about those; they are good things!

    If you'd like to talk about it, feel free to PM me. :)
  4. Ya Ya

    Ya Ya

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    To be honest, I really think it's fairly common for people to second guess any life changing decision they make. Just keep in mind the reasons behind your choice and go with your gut feeling. I too had second thoughts about my decision a year ago but have since realized that my initial instinct was the right one. So my advice to you would be to give it a bit of time and if you still have doubts call the DCT and/advisor and see if you could withdraw your acceptance. There are a lot of consequences of this but I highly doubt anyone would advise you to be some place you'd rather not be as an alternative.
  5. chuckdanger

    chuckdanger

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    Buyer's remorse, it is a very commonplace feeling. Hopefully you gave your decision more time than, say, accepting it immediately after receiving the email notification. I'm sure your reasons for picking this program were sound and you will hopefully get what you expected out of it (a PhD and plenty of training to prepare you for a fulfilling career). Sometimes our best decisions come from the gut, and in the end are the one's that make us the most content.

    That being said, if you've come across info (e.g., students that swear being in that program/working with that POI was the worst thing that ever happened to them) that makes your SERIOUSLY second-guess your decision, I would certainly weigh the costs-benefits of heading on your current path. Self-preservation is the most important aspect of any big life-decision, and if you don't think that you will ultimately be happy spending the next 4-6 years training in this program then I would certainly reevaluate it. I've spoken with a few individuals that accepted an offer and ultimately declined it for a better one after some "soul searching", and though it burned a few bridges they attest to it having been the best route for them.You must have had a good reason for making the decision that you did, but this process can promote a sense of tunnel-vision when it comes to doing whats in your best interest so keep that in mind before becoming content with your choice (though know that reneging on your decision will certainly reflect you poorly).
  6. NotTheHoff

    NotTheHoff On Internship

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    Some people do, with good reason.
    Some people do, but it's more general buyer's remorse.
    Some people don't, with good reason.
    Some people don't, but it's more post-hoc rationalization.

    I know I'm Captain Obvious here, but it really comes down to why you're second-guessing now that would determine whether you should just shrug this off as part of the process or consider what to do next.
  7. BeachPsych

    BeachPsych

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    Any advice for somebody still trying to make a tough decision? I've been accepted to the clinical psych program where I'm finishing up my master's degree. It's currently unaccredited, but it is scheduled to start the accrediation process immediately and should hopefully be accredited before I graduate ....

    However, a professor at a larger much bigger name school (and accredited) emailed me to let me know they he may be offering me an acceptance in the near future ... but I would be working in a completely different area.

    I know I enjoy the work I do now, and the work I would continue to do if I stayed here, but it's hard to turn down an offer from an accredited school with better street cred. Any advice would be wonderful.
  8. spafticus

    spafticus

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    Accreditation. No brainer imo.
  9. Jon Snow

    Jon Snow Senior Member

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    Is the unaccredited position fully funded? Don't accept the unaccredited position, in my opinion.
  10. Kappadocia

    Kappadocia

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    If the unaccredited program offered a full tuition remission and a respectable stipend (compared to the accredited one), would you still advise against attending the school?
  11. BeachPsych

    BeachPsych

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    Both programs are fully funded for the duration. The problem is I don't think I actually want to work in the specific field I would be working in under the professor at the accredited program.
  12. syzergy

    syzergy

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    Is it completely unrelated to what you want to do? Some professors will let you branch out a bit from their research as long as it's similar. Not all, but some.
  13. BeachPsych

    BeachPsych

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    Unfortunately, the areas are not really similar at all. I just don't want to end up going to the accredited school because everybody says it's the "right" thing to do, but then not being excited about what I'll be researching for the next few years of my life.
  14. NotTheHoff

    NotTheHoff On Internship

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    Are you planning to go more so into research or practice?

    I took a risk a few years back in choosing a newer, non-accredited program over an accredited program because I was (still am) primarily interested in research, and the program I chose was highly respected in my area of research with loads of opportunities. I have, however, developed an interest in balancing my research with some clinical practice. Keep in mind that even in academia, some clinical research jobs will want faculty from accredited programs. It's great that the program is going for accreditation, but there's no guarantee it will happen by the time you finish. I'd want to know what kind of feedback they have received, if they have completed their self-study, and where they specifically are in the process.

    I'll be honest: knowing what I know about the field five years later, I'm not sure I would pick to go to my non-accredited school again solely because of the risks of being limited by possibly coming from a non-accredited university. I'll again be honest: I'm not sure that would be the best decision for me either.
  15. kinzie

    kinzie

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    Is there an option to re-apply next year and hopefully get an accredited school in a research area you do care about? Credentials frankly matter, and going to an unaccredited program is a gamble.

    I chose a program with a better reputation/better program, but not my research area. Does that make research harder and demoralizing at times? Yes. However, my training in every area has been excellent and it is gratifying to see my program's reputation open up doors. I wouldn't undo my choice. Occasionally, I wish I waited to reapply to other schools to get a better overall fit.

    That said, my career plan is to go into the military, which is 99% clinical work, so doing research in a different area doesn't significantly change my career trajectory. If you want a career in research, not liking your research is a much bigger problem, because your grad work will set the path for your later work.

    In terms of not wanting to do something because it's the "right" thing to do . . . it's usually the right thing to do for a reason.
    Last edited: 03.30.12
  16. Comealongpond

    Comealongpond

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    "I chose a program with a better reputation/better program, but not my research area. Does that make research harder and demoralizing at times? Yes."

    Please elaborate... I'm in a similar position. How is it "demoralizing"?

    thanks!
  17. PsychIs

    PsychIs

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