Short and Asian for men is pretty much the kiss of death for dating in America

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touchpause13 said:
You have anecdotal evidence. Let me reiterate that I am a trained sexual assault and domestic violence advocate. You do not know what you are talking about.
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No you're completely clueless.
Go provide evidence to the courts that all rape is exactly equal and the circumstances are irrelevant. Maybe the penalty will become the same for all forms of sexual assault. :)
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And I assume you are in such close communication with these 4000 friends that they will confide their deepest darkest secrets to you, like sexual assault?

Did you really just say having Facebook friends is a sign of social diversity? :rofl:

Now this is getting hilarious.

**** son.
 
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The girl I was talking about. They drugged her and pushed her up against a furnace, causing massive burns on the back of her legs. They were horribly scarred. Every time someone asked about the scars she was reminded of her rape. She had to wear pants at all times. Every time she saw her body it brought back the knowledge of being assaulted and having no control over the situation, not even able to scream for help. Having to wake up and figure out what happened, only to find out that someone had made her so vulnerable that there was absolutely nothing to be done. If you are seriously going to sit there and say that's not traumatic "enough" for you - then you are a monster.
 
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studentp0x said:
No you're completely clueless.
Go provide evidence to the courts that all rape is exactly equal and the circumstances are irrelevant. Maybe the penalty will become the same for all forms of sexual assault. :)
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She's not saying they are equal in terms of how the courts will punish them

She says they are equal in the potential to traumatize the victim depending on both the victim and circumstances. How can you still not understand this?
 
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haha i think he ran away.

hmm.. I should figure out what to make for dinner. Any suggestions, WTF?
 
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Just as my previous example was meant to convey that the outcome is the same and the trauma caused is equal in potential. Nothing about courts of justice system

And you point of manslaughter vs murder - the remaining vitcims (the family) will be just as traumatized either way.

We are not talking about the legal system

Let me repeat that. We are not talking about the legal system.

We are talking about the impact of traumatic events (rape, a family member's death, etc.) on victims. You cannot call one rape worse than the other just as you could not tell a wife whose husband had been accidentally killed versus murdered that it would have been worse if it had been intentional. She will still be without as husband and hurting. The rape victim will still have been raped, whether she was conscious for it or had to be told later about it, which also happens often. In some ways I think not being able to remember it and having to hear it from a 3rd party (doctor, friend, the rapist themselves) would be even more horrifying, at least for me.
 
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Oh you know me, a sip of alcohol and I'll be greeting the mail man beaver first!
 
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touchpause13 said:
The girl I was talking about. They drugged her and pushed her up against a furnace, causing massive burns on the back of her legs. They were horribly scarred. Every time someone asked about the scars she was reminded of her rape. She had to wear pants at all times. Every time she saw her body it brought back the knowledge of being assaulted and having no control over the situation, not even able to scream for help. Having to wake up and figure out what happened, only to find out that someone had made her so vulnerable that there was absolutely nothing to be done. If you are seriously going to sit there and say that's not traumatic "enough" for you - then you are a monster.
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Well that's terrible, but it isn't a common thing that occurs (marks left on body).
 
WhtsThFrequency said:
Just as my previous example was meant to convey that the outcome is the same and the trauma caused is equal in potential. Nothing about courts of justice system

And you point of manslaughter vs murder - the remaining vitcims (the family) will be just as traumatized either way.

We are not talking about the legal system

Let me repeat that. We are not talking about the legal system.

We are talking about the impact of traumatic events (rape, a family member's death, etc.) on victims. You cannot call one rape worse than the other just as you could not tell a wife whose husband had been accidentally killed versus murdered that it would have been worse if it had been intentional. She will still be without as husband and hurting. The rape victim will still have been raped, whether she was conscious for it or had to be told later about it, which also happens often. In some ways I think not being able to remember it and having to hear it from a 3rd party (doctor, friend, the rapist themselves) would be even more horrifying, at least for me.
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The legal system allows us to make the least subjective judgement of the situation. Laws come forward based on evidence, not based on what someone like yourself simply thinks.
The different penalties to rapists are given based on how severe their crime was assessed to be.
 
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touchpause13 said:
haha i think he ran away.

hmm.. I should figure out what to make for dinner. Any suggestions, WTF?
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Ran away from 2 sluts? oh please. One of which is a former cheater and the other has slept with over 10 men.
 
Ahahahha.
Ahh
Ahaha
Haha.

Did you seriously just say over 10 like it's a big number? Precious.
 
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WhtsThFrequency said:
She's not saying they are equal in terms of how the courts will punish them

She says they are equal in the potential to traumatize the victim depending on both the victim and circumstances. How can you still not understand this?
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Potential? Maybe.
You're saying that just because like 5% of unconscious rape victims are traumatized equally, that it's safe to assume that all of them are traumatized that badly.
 
touchpause13 said:
Ahahahha.
Ahh
Ahaha
Haha.

Did you seriously just say over 10 like it's a big number? Precious.
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Well seeing as how I know girls with 10-20 times that... it's not a huge number no. :) But very few quality men would go for a girl who's slept with 10+ dudes.
 
TP, you kinda feel like this?

tumblr_mw3pihFWKE1rd8fxwo1_500.gif
 
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studentp0x said:
Ran away from 2 intelligent and beautiful married ladies because they presented information my brain could not handle? yes, yes I did, other Barry.
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FTFY
 
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Someone who is intelligent and beautiful enough to not have to check her partner's text messages and emails.
 
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touchpause13 said:
Someone who is intelligent and beautiful enough to not have to check her partner's text messages and emails.
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Out of curiosity, how would you find out if he cheated on you?

inb4 you say he wouldn't. idiot logic...
 
The last time I had someone cheat on me, my (GUY ERMEGERD) friend told me.
 
I would bet the farm that he would never. But if he did... :shrug: wouldn't be the end of the world. Like I'd be mad and all, but we'd get over it.
 
Tungsten5 said:
Truth, but I'd argue it's not for the reasons you gave.

I know there's a few red pill guys out here, or just in general frustrated with girls in general and getting bitter about all of it.

You're right about a few things - girls give terrible dating advice. They mean well, but they aren't sitting with you to break down the minutia of social interactions. It's not some grand scheme to **** over ugly men so they can make a harem out of all the tall jacked jocks of the world.

What do I mean?

1.) Just talk to her. This can be the most frustrating advice ever for a lonely guy. It is based on the truth that you shouldn't be acting totally different around a girl. She should be another person you can talk to without reverting to odd behaviors that aren't congruent with who you actually are (which sets off alarms in a girls head.)

The problem here is that girls giving this advice don't realize the issue is guys get nervous and literally can't just talk - they resort to lines and canned behaviors to cope. But there's no way around it - try, fail, be creepy, but you'll eventually learn and make up this lost ground in terms of social skills.

Remember, this isn't some feminist propaganda or anything trying to destroy gender roles. It literally means...

2.) Be yourself. Be congruent. People can smell a faker a mile away. If you're one way around your guy friends and another way around girls you're not comfortable with who you are and girls in general. This is unattractive.

Why this advice doesn't work: it assumes being yourself is always a good thing. Nobody wants to tell you that. But sometimes it is true. Sometimes you need to change if you want to be someone attractive to at least some subset of girls.

The good news: you don't need a radical makeover. Find hobbies, interests, something meaningful. Do things. Achieve, and you will find yourself being able to talk to other people about meaningful, interesting things. Magic, right?

I know the above sounds pretty generic and unhelpful in of itself but I'm not delving too deep here, just showing how often generic advice is good but incomplete.

I'm rambling so I'll move back to my original point: having girls as friends will help you more because you are proving to yourself girls can be talked to just like guy friends. And you'll lose that nervousness. And you'll be able Talk to them and be yourself.

A cool side benefit by the way is that female friends are instant proof you're not a creep - it's like being vouched for.

If you're lucky enough to find a friend who will walk you through your creeper tendencies all the better, but I think it's pretty tough to make those kinds of friends if you exhibit these traits in the first place. Also pretty hard to not get offered by it. You'll probably have more success IMO if you do some serious introspection, pull back your approaches to women and limit to safe locations to women 'in your league' and then gently push boundaries to see what you are capable of.

Always think of it as making up for lost social ground. You're developing skills your peers made long ago. Not a knock on you, just a reality to confront.
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I have different opinion regarding how to talk to a girl. Instead of advocating talking to girls the same way you talk to guys, I believe the approach should be different. And the difference is based on the fact that girls dig power, both social and physical power.
So when you talk to girl, you must be in the position of power, at least in the initial stage.
For example, you ask about the girl instead of showing off yourself during the conversation (because trying to impress her by speaking out your merits put you in a lower position, you need to let her showing off her merits)
Praise the girl (because only person who is better and more powerful can praise)
Treat/tease her like a little girl (because girl likes to feel small around guy)
Don't push too hard, don't keeps on asking her out, even to safe location (because it seems that you are begging her and you immediately put yourself in a lower position). Try to pretend that you don't care even if you care about her. Welcome her to join you instead of asking her what she want to do and join her.
When you talk to a guy, however, you would like to put yourself in a relatively lower position, so other guys don't feel threatened
Guy hate/envy powerful guys, girls flock to them. It's just like girls envy/hate beautiful girls and guys flock to them.
And I have always been suspicious of the suggestion"be yourself". If I stick to "being myself", I would have spent my childhood in video games instead of academic work and would not achieve my current status. Same rule applies to dating, you need to work on improving yourself to make you attractive to your target population. You need to be both physically and socially stronger, just like girls wearing make up to make themselves beautiful.
 
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ctcell said:
I have different opinion regarding how to talk to a girl. Instead of advocating talking to girls the same way you talk to guys, I believe the approach should be different. And the difference is based on the fact that girls dig power, both social and physical power.
So when you talk to girl, you must be in the position of power, at least in the initial stage.
For example, you ask about the girl instead of showing off yourself during the conversation (because trying to impress her by speaking out your merits put you in a lower position, you need to let her showing off her merits)
Praise the girl (because only person who is better and more powerful can praise)
Treat/tease her like a little girl (because girl likes to feel small around guy)
Don't push too hard, don't keeps on asking her out, even to safe location (because it seems that you are begging her and you immediately put yourself in a lower position). Try to pretend that you don't care even if you care about her. Welcome her to join you instead of asking her what she want to do and join her.
When you talk to a guy, however, you would like to put yourself in a relatively lower position, so other guys don't feel threatened
Guy hate/envy powerful guys, girls flock to them. It's just like girls envy/hate beautiful girls and guys flock to them.
And I have always be suspicious of the suggestion"be yourself". If I stick to "being myself", I would have spent my childhood in video games instead of academic work and would not achieve my current status. Same rule applies to dating, you need to work on improving yourself to make you attractive to your target population. You need to be both physically and socially stronger, just like girls wearing make up to make themselves beautiful.
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I think the distinctions you're making between guys and girls are arbitrary and will end up hurting the quality of people you attract.

I tease my buddies all the time. I praise my friends. I certainly don't act stronger or weaker around guys or girls, though I always try to be someone strong, high-status, and with high self-worth.

I do the latter because it's who I think I am and who I hope to be and it is always a self-fulfilling thing. The guy friends and girls I attract are okay with this because I seek out similar high character high value individuals. I could never be friends with envious, easily intimidated men.

We agree on the self-improvement part - I did mention that in my post. The idea is to be yourself around girls (everyone really) just make sure that person is worth something.
 
ctcell said:
I have different opinion regarding how to talk to a girl. Instead of advocating talking to girls the same way you talk to guys, I believe the approach should be different. And the difference is based on the fact that girls dig power, both social and physical power.
So when you talk to girl, you must be in the position of power, at least in the initial stage.
For example, you ask about the girl instead of showing off yourself during the conversation (because trying to impress her by speaking out your merits put you in a lower position, you need to let her showing off her merits)
Praise the girl (because only person who is better and more powerful can praise)
Treat/tease her like a little girl (because girl likes to feel small around guy)
Don't push too hard, don't keeps on asking her out, even to safe location (because it seems that you are begging her and you immediately put yourself in a lower position). Try to pretend that you don't care even if you care about her. Welcome her to join you instead of asking her what she want to do and join her.
When you talk to a guy, however, you would like to put yourself in a relatively lower position, so other guys don't feel threatened
Guy hate/envy powerful guys, girls flock to them. It's just like girls envy/hate beautiful girls and guys flock to them.
And I have always been suspicious of the suggestion"be yourself". If I stick to "being myself", I would have spent my childhood in video games instead of academic work and would not achieve my current status. Same rule applies to dating, you need to work on improving yourself to make you attractive to your target population. You need to be both physically and socially stronger, just like girls wearing make up to make themselves beautiful.
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Is this a joke?
 
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ctcell said:
I have different opinion regarding how to talk to a girl. Instead of advocating talking to girls the same way you talk to guys, I believe the approach should be different. And the difference is based on the fact that girls dig power, both social and physical power.
So when you talk to girl, you must be in the position of power, at least in the initial stage.
For example, you ask about the girl instead of showing off yourself during the conversation (because trying to impress her by speaking out your merits put you in a lower position, you need to let her showing off her merits)
Praise the girl (because only person who is better and more powerful can praise)
Treat/tease her like a little girl (because girl likes to feel small around guy)
Don't push too hard, don't keeps on asking her out, even to safe location (because it seems that you are begging her and you immediately put yourself in a lower position). Try to pretend that you don't care even if you care about her. Welcome her to join you instead of asking her what she want to do and join her.
When you talk to a guy, however, you would like to put yourself in a relatively lower position, so other guys don't feel threatened
Guy hate/envy powerful guys, girls flock to them. It's just like girls envy/hate beautiful girls and guys flock to them.
And I have always been suspicious of the suggestion"be yourself". If I stick to "being myself", I would have spent my childhood in video games instead of academic work and would not achieve my current status. Same rule applies to dating, you need to work on improving yourself to make you attractive to your target population. You need to be both physically and socially stronger, just like girls wearing make up to make themselves beautiful.
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1. Please, no. That's immature and demeaning. It makes you look like a fool.

2. Why would I waste my time with a guy who seems like he doesn't care about me? I've had two guys in my life pull that type of stuff and I immediately started looking elsewhere. If you make it clear you're not into me (or insult my intelligence by playing that game) I'm sure as heck not going to waste my time. There are tons of other guys who are secure enough to express their interest.

Sounds like someone's been reading too many PUA websites.

These "rules" all depend on the kind of girl you are wanting to attract. If you are trying for a half-witted, easily led girl to pump and dump, sure. If you are looking for a relationship with a girl who has actual smarts, we can smell these "power plays" from a mile away and it's rather unattractive. If you want the former - hey, go for it. Different strokes for different folks. But don't expect anything serious to come from it.

I even remember one guy who tried to "neg" me (one of the guys who also pulled the "I'm going to pretend I'm not interested and in control" card). It was ****ing hilarious. Needless to say, he didn't get a second date :laugh:

You're on target with the improving yourself, though. Self-confidence is SO important in dating. Not to the point of being a jerk (which a lot of guys don't get) but enough so that you seem comfortable with yourself.
 
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Haha I seriously thought this guy was joking!

What's your opener? Are you going to ask me about your little sister getting a tattoo? Lol. Smart girls can smell a PUA from a mile away. Don't be that guy
 
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touchpause13 said:
I would bet the farm that he would never. But if he did... :shrug: wouldn't be the end of the world. Like I'd be mad and all, but we'd get over it.
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I think the moral of the story is, if you never check... you're at risk of being one of those people who's cheated on and never finds out. I don't really check my gf's stuff like that... using someone else's phone to mess around isn't an issue nor is being on their computer or whatever. If anything, someone who has a problem with it is hiding something 100%.
 
Haha okay dude. Everyone here has said you clearly have trust issues... but keep on keeping on I guess
 
Holy mother of crap. I'd never seen this thread until this evening so started from post #1. Then I got hooked like watching a bad Maury or Jerry Springer episode. I got so frustrated after about 200 posts. **** that, skipping to the end. This whole thread is "What *****ic thing will studentp0x say NEXT?" vs. about 99% of the other posters. He has GOT to be a [successful] troll or something.

brb I'll read the last page just 'cause I'm hooked.
 
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Haha I promise it's worth it
 
Stroganoff said:
Holy mother of crap. I'd never seen this thread until this evening so started from post #1. Then I got hooked like watching a bad Maury or Jerry Springer episode. I got so frustrated after about 200 posts. **** that, skipping to the end. This whole thread is "What *****ic thing will studentp0x say NEXT?" vs. about 99% of the other posters. He has GOT to be a [successful] troll or something.

brb I'll read the last page just 'cause I'm hooked.
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Only like 2-3 people really disagreed with me this whole thread, 1 on 2-3 is certainly a big war eh. Ironically only ever feminists disagree with me and beta males like the OP. You tend to wonder why. ;)
 
studentp0x said:
Only like 2-3 people really disagreed with me this whole thread, 1 on 2-3 is certainly a big war eh. Ironically only ever feminists disagree with me and beta males like the OP. You tend to wonder why. ;)
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That's 'cause the rest of us haven't felt the need to post our disagreement since it would probably be futile and a waste of time. I'm sure enough people have fed the troll that you are, however. :troll:

But I promise that you are delusional. I'll only engage you for my own entertainment just to save my sanity, since I just know you're messing with people here.

Hold on, getting a call on my "other" cell phone. Guys can be hookers too. I only cater to female virgins though. Daddy's got student loans.
 
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This thread has been marked as a depression trigger for me, never coming back here.
 
Wow.

Interesting thread.

OP: Talk to women (you are attracted to) the way you would anybody else, but accept that some of those people (you know, women) won't like you, just like anyone else might not like you. Enjoy the wonderful relationship(s) that come from this gem.

What I have just described is, effectively, "confidence:" being yourself without regard for what others think. Yup, that's confidence alright.

*YOU'RE WELCOME*

Well, looks like my work here is done. Silent Cool is off to the bar.

check ya later.
 
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WhtsThFrequency said:
1. Please, no. That's immature and demeaning. It makes you look like a fool.

2. Why would I waste my time with a guy who seems like he doesn't care about me? I've had two guys in my life pull that type of stuff and I immediately started looking elsewhere. If you make it clear you're not into me (or insult my intelligence by playing that game) I'm sure as heck not going to waste my time. There are tons of other guys who are secure enough to express their interest.

Sounds like someone's been reading too many PUA websites.

These "rules" all depend on the kind of girl you are wanting to attract. If you are trying for a half-witted, easily led girl to pump and dump, sure. If you are looking for a relationship with a girl who has actual smarts, we can smell these "power plays" from a mile away and it's rather unattractive. If you want the former - hey, go for it. Different strokes for different folks. But don't expect anything serious to come from it.

I even remember one guy who tried to "neg" me (one of the guys who also pulled the "I'm going to pretend I'm not interested and in control" card). It was ******* hilarious. Needless to say, he didn't get a second date :laugh:

You're on target with the improving yourself, though. Self-confidence is SO important in dating. Not to the point of being a jerk (which a lot of guys don't get) but enough so that you seem comfortable with yourself.
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In fact, OP will probably benefit from learning to be a jerk. The reason is that I smell a sense of desperation from his posts. And I am sure that girls around him can also smell it. He has internalized this insecurity and desperation to such an extent that we need to treat him aggressively. Just like normal insulin level will not be sufficient for insulin resistant type 2 diabetes patients, they need a higher level of insulin to keep blood glucose in the normal range. OP is "confidence resistant" and need to learn to become a "jerk" in order to look like a normal person.
Studentp0x has already talked about how to be physically powerful, that I have nothing to add, although his suggestion seems quite extreme.
I am just laying out how to be socially powerful. OP may look fake when he initially tries to do these. But he will finally internalize that into his personality after faking it many times.
The female responders here might be smart enough to quickly identify a "jerk", but girls that smart are uncommon based on my experience (and that is why PUA give suggestions similar to mine). I believe that OP should do the "statistically correct" things to improve the chance of getting a girl.
Any comments are welcomed as I am still in the learning process.
 
Jay Eff Cee it's not necessarily dichotomous all-or-nothing doormat-versus-jerk. That kind of oscillation is maybe the formative stage of someone just learning ****, but it's still amateur hour. In case what I just said isn't clear enough, I agree with the overly obvious notion to exude confidence and lose the insecurities and self-defeating attitude, but going full ****** into jerk/ass-hole mode is not the solution.

Although honestly I think if we're going to share ideas or discuss this topic, we need to all be on the same page as far as definitions. Because words such as nice, nice guy, jerk, friends all have multiple meanings that taint discussions such as these.

I'm cynical to the point that I do not necessarily believe the OP or many of the unestablished posters with low post counts and tend to think they are trolling, to the point where it's not even worth the time or effort to participate in a discussion here. And hell, someone else posted in the Lounge a few months ago and I spent like 2 hours writing a long ass post and his head was so far up his own ass that he only responded to advice from women, even when I explicitly described why I think guys give better advice to other guys (assuming one's agenda isn't deceptive) than girls.

Sometimes it's just not worth it. And the fact that the OP even discussed prostitutes makes me think this is a trolling thread.
 
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Strog, come on now, I give damn good advice cuz I know this game from all angles. ;)
 
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