Short and Asian for men is pretty much the kiss of death for dating in America

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studentp0x said:
Only like 2-3 people really disagreed with me this whole thread, 1 on 2-3 is certainly a big war eh. Ironically only ever feminists disagree with me and beta males like the OP. You tend to wonder why. ;)
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Kids who use the term beta-male are hilarious. Life must have been hard being emasculated by your mom.
 
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Modeselektor said:
Kids who use the term beta-male are hilarious. Life must have been hard being emasculated by your mom.
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How else do you describe a guy who's friendzoned by every female they talk to and whose personality makes you cringe?
 
studentp0x said:
How else do you describe a guy who's friendzoned by every female they talk to and whose personality makes you cringe?
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I'd call him studentp0x
 
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studentp0x said:
How else do you describe a guy who's friendzoned by every female they talk to and whose personality makes you cringe?
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An average confused young man who should get a beer with me some time.
 
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My number is lower than yours boo boo. Maybe you should try a different insult you have used both of those already
 
I knew this thread is gonna be a troll

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touchpause13 said:
My number is lower than yours boo boo. Maybe you should try a different insult you have used both of those already
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You're coming off as a 30+ year old female (based on your own words) who thinks she's so mature and all knowing and talking to an inferior little kid who has no idea what they're saying... yet you're competing with me on who has the better insult/comeback?

loooooooooooolll

In reality if you never mentioned anything about your possible age, I'd think you're a 17 year old wannabe naive feminist having a hormone spike.
 
I think you have me confused with someone else because I'm in my early 20s
 
You two need to copulate and eradicate the hate, lest you continue to reiterate, irritate and ultimately instigate. Either that or you could sublimate.
 
Not so much into the penis
 
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My apologies.

I can't think of orientation neutral sexual word with an appropriate suffix. :bag:
 
Modeselektor said:
Kids who use the term beta-male are hilarious. Life must have been hard being emasculated by your mom.
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studentp0x said:
You're coming off as a 30+ year old female (based on your own words) who thinks she's so mature and all knowing and talking to an inferior little kid who has no idea what they're saying... yet you're competing with me on who has the better insult/comeback?

loooooooooooolll

In reality if you never mentioned anything about your possible age, I'd think you're a 17 year old wannabe naive feminist having a hormone spike.
Click to expand...

touchpause13 said:
I think you have me confused with someone else because I'm in my early 20s
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His mom.
 
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Holy ****. The psychoanalysis in full effect.

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The Kubler-Ross sequence has been initiated.
 
It is pretty clear to me that studentp0x is preoccupied with the idea that any girl he settles down with not have more sexual partners than him.

That's totally understandable by the way - you don't want to feel like you haven't had the experience you could have relative to your partner. Very human.

On the other, it is best to be upfront about this thought process rather than resort to 'slut shaming'. The whole phenomenon, in my opinion, is a direct result of this reasonable insecurity being buried and masked for by the artificial construct of having more sexual partners = bad.

(Of course, one could interject and say this stigma is a logical outgrowth of the frankly undeniable trend that it is a subset of men that are having relations with the majority of women but I would respond that this is a self-reinforcing outcome. Being judgmental, sex-negative, and possessive makes for an extremely unattractive personality that won't get you anywhere in terms of casual sex. Fix it if you want to bump those numbers!)
 
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I'm not Asian or male, but I can definitely relate to the OP because I was never asked out by anyone during my time in college. I am driven to graduate with a perfect 4.0 and this goal has caused me to not go out on the town or make new friends. Sometimes I feel like I will die alone as well and I have wondered about the value of life because there is no point working so hard to get through school and coming home to an empty house and dinner for one.

@studentp0x, I am not lazy, stupid, or possess some social flaw, yet my BMI seems to always settle around 25. Is this too fat to be treated like a human being? In high school I engaged in anorexic and bulimic behavior and played two sports that kept me in the 120 weight range, but now I have hypothyroidism, everyday is a struggle. Yesterday, I had one slice of bread for the first time in 4 months, but I guess that is the price I must pay to be socially-acceptable. I think the problem that most of us have is that we just assume things when looking at others instead of approaching them with a tabula rasa.

For people who are pursuing a field where empathy is really important, I would recommend developing some compassion and understanding for your fellow man. Nobody chooses their race, medical conditions, height, acne, eye color, socio-economic status, hair texture, voice, lineage etc.; therefore, why must we punish each other with rude comments and alienation?

@ShortDoctor, if you are still single and want a happy life, consider dating regular women online, joining a church, or online meetup social group. You have to be proactive if you want to see an improvement in your situation.

I hate putting my business out there, but I feel very strongly about social issues.
 
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HobbitJane said:
I'm not Asian or male, but I can definitely relate to the OP because I was never asked out by anyone during my time in college. I am driven to graduate with a perfect 4.0 and this goal has caused me to not go out on the town or make new friends. Sometimes I feel like I will die alone as well and I have wondered about the value of life because there is no point working so hard to get through school and coming home to an empty house and dinner for one.

@studentp0x, I am not lazy, stupid, or possess some social flaw, yet my BMI seems to always settle around 25. Is this too fat to be treated like a human being? In high school I engaged in anorexic and bulimic behavior and played two sports that kept me in the 120 weight range, but now I have hypothyroidism, everyday is a struggle. Yesterday, I had one slice of bread for the first time in 4 months, but I guess that is the price I must pay to be socially-acceptable. I think the problem that most of us have is that we just assume things when looking at others instead of approaching them with a tabula rasa.

For people who are pursuing a field where empathy is really important, I would recommend developing some compassion and understanding for your fellow man. Nobody chooses their race, medical conditions, height, acne, eye color, socio-economic status, hair texture, voice, lineage etc.; therefore, why must we punish each other with rude comments and alienation?

@ShortDoctor, if you are still single and want a happy life, consider dating regular women online, joining a church, or online meetup social group. You have to be proactive if you want to see an improvement in your situation.

I hate putting my business out there, but I feel very strongly about social issues.
Click to expand...
Well in person I treat everyone with respect based on how their personality is... But when it comes down to dating and such, well the world has a harsh reality for most. Btw to respond to what you said directly... I feel most people can control most of what they have and improve themselves. Lifts for height, the gym for improving appearance, skin products for skin, etc etc and so on.

I feel my advice (and some agreed certainly) for the OP was ideal because it was REALISTIC.

What happens is people like @WhtsThFrequency and @touchpause13 come in and say things like "just be confident" "just be yourself" "just go out and talk to girls you like" and so on. In reality it's correct but it's extremely unrealistic. It's like telling a super lazy person to suddenly go out and work 80 hour weeks to achieve a certain goal. The advice could be accurate but it's unrealistic and won't end up happening. Not to mention that at age 35, the OP still being a virgin means he's heard all that stuff before and it hasn't gotten him anymore since he physically is not able to act on it.
However for a guy like him, losing his virginity (obviously by paying) as a first step and taking slow steps to improve himself physically, will help him immensely. That's something that can be acted on.
 
studentp0x said:
I feel most people can control most of what they have and improve themselves. Lifts for height, the gym for improving appearance, skin products for skin, etc etc and so on.

I feel my advice (and some agreed certainly) for the OP was ideal because it was REALISTIC.
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I see what you are saying but sometimes these steps do not work if a person has an endocrine issue (which is more common than you think) or the body is extremely resistant to the skin product. I believe we have all had that friend or family member who can consume 2000 calories of food, yet remains paper thin without going to the gym. How would you explain this phenomenon and why should this thin marvel be placed on a pedestal in the dating world even though they may not take an active, responsible role in managing their health?

Have you ever heard of Accutane? Apparently it does wonders for clearing up acne but some of the side effects include trouble concentrating, depression, painful joints and suicidal ideation. Do you really think it is worth the hassle of being emotionally-unstable in order to secure a date or "get it in"? If for some reason your "look" was not in fashion, would you go get a procedure to fit in with the mainstream e.g. bleach your skin, dye your hair, get implants? I do agree that certain voluntary factors should be worked on, but in general, society is too harsh on people who do not have a mainstream appearance because there is an assumption that everyone's body works the same, when in reality, this is false (think about Pharmacogenomics).

Those other users probably disagreed with your suggestion to the OP to visit a hooker because it just seems extreme. In my culture, sex is not an ego booster or recreational activity, there is some class and dignity involved. I just feel like the OP has my problem, so I think he would benefit from just getting out more, and literally forcing himself to socialize with others. I feel that losing his virginity to a hooker would exacerbate his social anxiety because what if he has a bad experience or contracts a disease? By paying for unsatisfying and meaningless sex, he may actually lower his self-esteem because he may feel like a loser. Personally, I would feel more accomplished to earn someone's love through my positive attributes, than pay a male escort to pretend to like me. The OP has probably sorted through his problems by now, but I found this topic interesting and I wanted to provide my two cents on the matter.
 
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HobbitJane said:
I see what you are saying but sometimes these steps do not work if a person has a endocrine issue (which is more common than you think) or the body is extremely resistant to the skin product. I believe we have all had that friend or family member who can consume 2000 calories of food, yet remains paper thin without going to the gym. How would you explain this phenomenon and why should this thin marvel be placed on a pedestal in the dating world even though they may not take an active, responsible role in managing their health?

Have you ever heard of Accutane? Apparently it does wonders for clearing up acne but some of the side effects include trouble concentrating, depression, painful joints and suicidal ideation. Do you really think it is worth the hassle of being emotionally-unstable in order to secure a date or "get it in"? If for some reason your "look" was not in fashion, would you go get a procedure to fit in with the mainstream e.g. bleach your skin, dye your hair, get implants? I do agree that certain voluntary factors should be worked on, but in general, society is too harsh on people who do not have a mainstream appearance because there is an assumption that everyone's body works the same, when in reality, this is false (think about Pharmacogenomics).

Those other users probably disagreed with your suggestion to the OP to visit a hooker because it just seems extreme. In my culture, sex is not an ego booster or recreational activity, there is some class and dignity involved. I just feel like the OP has my problem, so I think he would benefit from just getting out more, and literally forcing himself to socialize with others. I feel that losing his virginity to a hooker would exacerbate his social anxiety because what if he has a bad experience or contracted a disease? By paying for unsatisfying and meaningless sex, he may actually lower his self-esteem because he may feel like a loser. Personally, I would feel more accomplished to earn someone's love through my positive attributes, than pay a male escort to pretend to like me. The OP has probably sorted through his problems by now, but I found this topic interesting and I wanted to provide my two cents on the matter.
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Well what's the obsession with being super thin? Most men don't like super thin girls, they like it average.Tons and tons of men love thicker girls... And I believe even with an endocrine issue, any female can maintain a decent thick look by going to the gym and exercising correctly. No need to strive to look thin.

Even with the current outlined issues of accutane, it remains a good choice for those who have severe acne. If it's to the point where you can't function in society, you're better off taking accutane and taking a couple supplements to minimize side effects.

And my hooker advice was based off of what I've seen with 3 different virgins who went that route (that I know) along with a couple people I read online who did the same.It seems to work because it makes you realize that sex isn't something that's super special. Keep in mind the OP doesn't share your cultural values and he's tried to see one in a different country and was rejected apparently ("high class" one) and doesn't see one in the US for potential legal issues (which are nonexistent if he does it right of course).
Once someone realizes it's nothing special, then that negative tension inside of you goes away.
Otherwise you're caught in an endless cycle of trying too hard to lose your virginity, and failing. Every cycle gets worse and worse. Then the person goes onto develop even more unattractive traits, which makes it near impossible to escape that pattern.
In the end, seeing an escort does nothing but good for the OP. The risk of an std/legal issue is negligible.

Thing is, females don't think like males and give poor advice to men. My success with women always increased whenever I did the opposite of what females suggested. And others say the same thing when the issue is brought up. The whole be confident and talk to who you like doesn't really work for a lot of guys.
 
@studentp0x, you made some valid points. If I had the chance, I would rather reach out to people like the OP and provide them with therapy and the tools to succeed in social situations versus taking the sexual route. I guess it is different strokes for different folks.
 
HobbitJane said:
I'm not Asian or male, but I can definitely relate to the OP because I was never asked out by anyone during my time in college. I am driven to graduate with a perfect 4.0 and this goal has caused me to not go out on the town or make new friends. Sometimes I feel like I will die alone as well and I have wondered about the value of life because there is no point working so hard to get through school and coming home to an empty house and dinner for one.

@studentp0x, I am not lazy, stupid, or possess some social flaw, yet my BMI seems to always settle around 25. Is this too fat to be treated like a human being? In high school I engaged in anorexic and bulimic behavior and played two sports that kept me in the 120 weight range, but now I have hypothyroidism, everyday is a struggle. Yesterday, I had one slice of bread for the first time in 4 months, but I guess that is the price I must pay to be socially-acceptable. I think the problem that most of us have is that we just assume things when looking at others instead of approaching them with a tabula rasa.

For people who are pursuing a field where empathy is really important, I would recommend developing some compassion and understanding for your fellow man. Nobody chooses their race, medical conditions, height, acne, eye color, socio-economic status, hair texture, voice, lineage etc.; therefore, why must we punish each other with rude comments and alienation?

@ShortDoctor, if you are still single and want a happy life, consider dating regular women online, joining a church, or online meetup social group. You have to be proactive if you want to see an improvement in your situation.

I hate putting my business out there, but I feel very strongly about social issues.
Click to expand...

Not to trivialize your struggles but hypothyroidism is usually very easily treatable with daily synthroid.
 
Any lawyer or judge here wants to step in and settle this thread once and for all already? Its been quite entertaining to read people's pov. But come on!!! Quite frankly, its getting so shallow and pathetic, those individual comes in and talk nonsense for the longest, wasting ppl time and my eyes gets sore just reading those trashy advice. You know who you are, thats right, im talking to u. Either give some constructive critisims and sound advices or get out. What a nag. Come in here and cursing left and right acting like you own this forum. Urghhh, leave already.

Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk
 
HobbitJane said:
@studentp0x, you made some valid points. If I had the chance, I would rather reach out to people like the OP and provide them with therapy and the tools to succeed in social situations versus taking the sexual route. I guess it is different strokes for different folks.
Click to expand...
Well the sexual "route" was just a first step. The main thing OP would need to do is making himself more attractive to the opposite sex and that would need him developing a very aesthetic physique along with using lifts.
Otherwise, what happens when he's rejected by 15 women in a row? Back to low confidence.
 
Misaenator said:
Any lawyer or judge here wants to step in and settle this thread once and for all already? Its been quite entertaining to read people's pov. But come on!!! Quite frankly, its getting so shallow and pathetic, those individual comes in and talk nonsense for the longest, wasting ppl time and my eyes gets sore just reading those trashy advice. You know who you are, thats right, im talking to u. Either give some constructive critisims and sound advices or get out. What a nag. Come in here and cursing left and right acting like you own this forum. Urghhh, leave already.

Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk
Click to expand...


Your tone seems very pointed right now
 
studentp0x said:
W
What happens is people like @WhtsThFrequency and @touchpause13 come in and say things like "just be confident" "just be yourself" "just go out and talk to girls you like" and so on. In reality it's correct but it's extremely unrealistic. It's like telling a super lazy person to suddenly go out and work 80 hour weeks to achieve a certain goal. The advice could be accurate but it's unrealistic and won't end up happening. Not to mention that at age 35, the OP still being a virgin means he's heard all that stuff before and it hasn't gotten him anymore since he physically is not able to act on it.
However for a guy like him, losing his virginity (obviously by paying) as a first step and taking slow steps to improve himself physically, will help him immensely. That's something that can be acted on.
Click to expand...

I don't think I ever gave advice of that sort, or else you are completely misunderstanding (or misrepresenting) my position. I'm quite cognizant that it is not an easily fixable situation :rolleyes:

My responses to the OP were with regards to his intentional perpetuation of a self-defeating, negative attitude and how that is hurting any chances he has. That doesn't translate into "just be confident"or "just be yourself". He can't "just be confident" because he is stuck in a negative psychological spiral, and he shouldn't "be himself" because right now "himself" is a self-pitying mess. This is something than needs to be addressed in tandem with steps such as working out, dressing well, etc.
 
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WhtsThFrequency said:
I don't think I ever gave advice of that sort, or else you are completely misunderstanding (or misrepresenting) my position. I'm quite cognizant that it is not an easily fixable situation :rolleyes:

My responses to the OP were with regards to his intentional perpetuation of a self-defeating, negative attitude and how that is hurting any chances he has. That doesn't translate into "just be confident"or "just be yourself". He can't "just be confident" because he is stuck in a negative psychological spiral, and he shouldn't "be himself" because right now "himself" is a self-pitying mess. This is something than needs to be addressed in tandem with steps such as working out, dressing well, etc.
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A self defeating negative attitude is the product of what life has presented to you. Involuntary celibacy in males can be the worst thing for it and that is why it's the first thing OP should deal with.
 
Dude I gave good advice. Fake it till you make it.
 
@touchpause13 Im talking abt those gunho who think they got swags and know how to spit games, then all of the sudden nobody cares jack abt what they have to say, calling ppl names, what a low life.

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Oh I know hunty. I was more responding to studentp0x. I completely agree with you
 
Anyway, whats good today? Its Fri for God's sake. Anybody scored any date tnite yet?

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Tungsten5 said:
Not to trivialize your struggles but hypothyroidism is usually very easily treatable with daily synthroid.
Click to expand...

I beg to differ. Some people never get their condition under control. You constantly have to adjust dosing until you are at a place of being functional. At one point, I lost weight but had hot flashes and tachycardia. On the far end of the spectrum I would sleep 8 hours (weekend) and still be tired and unproductive. It is basically a life of blood work and nutritional sacrifices. It should not be used as a crutch, but sometimes I just want a normal life. Could you eat nothing but salad for the rest of your life?
 
HobbitJane said:
I beg to differ. Some people never get their condition under control. You constantly have to adjust dosing until you are at a place of being functional. At one point, I lost weight but had hot flashes and tachycardia. On the far end of the spectrum I would sleep 8 hours (weekend) and still be tired and unproductive. It is basically a life of blood work and nutritional sacrifices. It should not be used as a crutch, but sometimes I just want a normal life. Could you eat nothing but salad for the rest of your life?
Click to expand...

I just want to say that this is a purely academic exercise from my end:

Assuming the cause of you hypothyroidism is low thyroid hormone, isn't it just a matter of finding the right dose?

The correct dose exists and is just waiting to be found. Otherwise you would be having a natural thyroid hormone output that is varying constantly, requiring varying doses day by day. This would point to some way deeper issues that hypothyroidism (I can't think of anything atm but there probably is something.)

Either that or something else is going on.

Again, this is for my own edification and totally unrelated to the overall conversation.
 
Tungsten5 said:
It is pretty clear to me that studentp0x is preoccupied with the idea that any girl he settles down with not have more sexual partners than him.

That's totally understandable by the way - you don't want to feel like you haven't had the experience you could have relative to your partner. Very human.

On the other, it is best to be upfront about this thought process rather than resort to 'slut shaming'. The whole phenomenon, in my opinion, is a direct result of this reasonable insecurity being buried and masked for by the artificial construct of having more sexual partners = bad.

(Of course, one could interject and say this stigma is a logical outgrowth of the frankly undeniable trend that it is a subset of men that are having relations with the majority of women but I would respond that this is a self-reinforcing outcome. Being judgmental, sex-negative, and possessive makes for an extremely unattractive personality that won't get you anywhere in terms of casual sex. Fix it if you want to bump those numbers!)
Click to expand...
Plenty of men in western society want to have a variety of sexual experiences with a large number of women then to settle down with an innocent inexperienced woman. Nothing wrong with wanting that.
 
studentp0x said:
Plenty of men in western society want to have a variety of sexual experiences with a large number of women then to settle down with an innocent inexperienced woman. Nothing wrong with wanting that.
Click to expand...

I didn't say there was. I'm just saying you shouldn't make an inability to achieve this goal into bitterness toward women who have.
 
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Tungsten5 said:
I didn't say there was. I'm just saying you shouldn't make an inability to achieve this goal into bitterness toward women who have.
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My gf only had 1 partner before me, so im good. :)
 
Tungsten5 said:
I just want to say that this is a purely academic exercise from my end:

Assuming the cause of you hypothyroidism is low thyroid hormone, isn't it just a matter of finding the right dose?

The correct dose exists and is just waiting to be found. Otherwise you would be having a natural thyroid hormone output that is varying constantly, requiring varying doses day by day. This would point to some way deeper issues that hypothyroidism (I can't think of anything atm but there probably is something.)

Either that or something else is going on.

Again, this is for my own edification and totally unrelated to the overall conversation.
Click to expand...

True, I did go off on a tangent, but it is medically-related lol. When dealing with a patient with hypothyroidism, there are more complex cases where the T4 is in the normal reference range, but the TSH is through the roof (overcompensation by pituitary gland). Some patients are unresponsive to thyroid hormone because of a gene mutation in a receptor for T3. Basically this is rare, but the patient has elevated TSH levels and all the symptoms (cold-intolerance, sluggish metabolism, etc.) even though they are producing adequate amounts of the hormone.
 
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Just read this thread from start to finish....

i-can-t-even-o.gif
 
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