Short and Asian for men is pretty much the kiss of death for dating in America

[studentp0x]

The average American man is 5'9" tall, about 50 years ago that was 5'8". Only about 15 percent of the male population is 6 feet tall or more. A lot of people believe that 6 feet tall is average, its average if you live in the Netherlands or some Scandinavian country as those places have the tallest people in the world.

I heard people say white males are taller, that is true to a degree but if you look at Europe, there are countries where men are tall, and those that are short. Particularly in Southern Europe, men tend to be shorter than those in Northern Europe.

Some Asian countries have very tall people as well, I think South Asians tend to taller than East Asians on average, particularly South Asians from the North tend to be tall, many as tall as the tallest Europeans.

I am about 5 inches taller than the average man from my parent's country.

A lot of factor seem to come into play here, genetics, health, and diet contribute to a person's height. There are many people who due to environmental factors do not achieve their full genetic potential.

Money does indeed play a role in the dating scene, I think a 5'6" Doctor who earns 250k a year has better dating prospects than a 6'1" truck driver.

face > body > personality > height > money

Assuming you're taller than the girl you're going for and note that I agree that money is very important... but my list is a very realistic representation of the order of importance of things. By far the most important part though is face and that ranks well above anything else. Attracting women with money just means she's a gold digger that'll cheat on you with a more attractive guy. Hence why we talk about "leagues" which are determined by one's face (for the most part).
A very good looking 5'8 guy who also has a good body/decent personality + an average job will do better than any rich guy or tall guy when it comes to normal women.

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[ShortDoctor]

face > body > personality > height > money

Assuming you're taller than the girl you're going for and note that I agree that money is very important... but my list is a very realistic representation of the order of importance of things. By far the most important part though is face and that ranks well above anything else. Attracting women with money just means she's a gold digger that'll cheat on you with a more attractive guy. Hence why we talk about "leagues" which are determined by one's face (for the most part).
A very good looking 5'8 guy who also has a good body/decent personality + an average job will do better than any rich guy or tall guy when it comes to normal women.

I disagree. From my experience and those of my friends, it seems that in general women value height>>>face>>money>personality> body. Height is a status that stays with an individual indefinitely.

 

[studentp0x]

I disagree. From my experience and those of my friends, it seems that in general women value height>>>face>>money>personality> body. Height is a status that stays with an individual indefinitely.

Nothing is even remotely as important as face. And that can be considered virtually a fact.

I know more tall guys that have zero success with women than I know slightly shorter guys (5'8-5'9ish). If a woman is attracted to your face... she wont reject you based off of height unless she's taller than you. So height is simply a bonus once you pass average.

Body is the second most important because a lot of your sex appeal stems off of how attractive your body looks.
You can also look at it this way... only 10-20% of men have any sort of major success with women in their life. And about the same percentage are what you can consider attractive. However a lot more than 10-20% of guys have a decent height... coupled with the fact that there are plenty of tall incels.

 

[Seth Joo]

face > body > personality > height > money

Assuming you're taller than the girl you're going for and note that I agree that money is very important... but my list is a very realistic representation of the order of importance of things. By far the most important part though is face and that ranks well above anything else. Attracting women with money just means she's a gold digger that'll cheat on you with a more attractive guy. Hence why we talk about "leagues" which are determined by one's face (for the most part).
A very good looking 5'8 guy who also has a good body/decent personality + an average job will do better than any rich guy or tall guy when it comes to normal women.

I have seen shorter guys with good jobs ($$$$) get chosen over taller working class men with less financial prowess. Money is huge, that is why its common to see less "attractive" men with good looking women.

I heard that actress from Modern Family turned down Joe Manginello, who is 6'5" down because he is "too hot".

Lionel Messi is 5'6" tall but I doubt he has any trouble dating.

 

[studentp0x]

I have seen shorter guys with good jobs ($$$$) get chosen over taller working class men with less financial prowess. Money is huge, that is why its common to see less "attractive" men with good looking women.

I heard that actress from Modern Family turned down Joe Manginello, who is 6'5" down because he is "too hot".

Lionel Messi is 5'6" tall but I doubt he has any trouble dating.

And you think a woman will remain faithful to a man who's less attractive? lol.... Money is huge when there is a lot of it. Not 200k.. think more in the millions. Though I see way more attractive men with average women than the other way around.

 

[Seth Joo]

And you think a woman will remain faithful to a man who's less attractive? lol.... Money is huge when there is a lot of it. Not 200k.. think more in the millions. Though I see way more attractive men with average women than the other way around.

If he is good looking and has an average looking girlfriend, I doubt he has money. 250k a year is actually a lot of money, I think only 5 percent of the American population earns that or more.

Speaking of height, 5'6" Vladmir Putin is listed as the most powerful man on Earth according to Forbes beating 6'1" Obama. Height ain't everything.

I am of Asian background myself, I can tell you that many Asian origin guys in America tend to have very poor attitudes and self esteem, this often keeps women away, poor attitude.

 

[studentp0x]

If he is good looking and has an average looking girlfriend, I doubt he has money. 250k a year is actually a lot of money, I think only 5 percent of the American population earns that or more.

Speaking of height, 5'6" Vladmir Putin is listed as the most powerful man on Earth according to Forbes beating 6'1" Obama. Height ain't everything.

I am of Asian background myself, I can tell you that many Asian origin guys in America tend to have very poor attitudes and self esteem, this often keeps women away, poor attitude.

I meant that the whole thing about guys dating above their league is largely uncommon. The other way around though holds true.
Height matters. Money matters. But nothing is as important as face and then body.

 

[Mad Jack]

I meant that the whole thing about guys dating above their league is largely uncommon. The other way around though holds true.
Height matters. Money matters. But nothing is as important as face and then body.

The most successful guy I've ever known when it comes to getting laid is fairly unattractive but charismatic as all hell. Dude is overweight and bald, in his mid-30s, and still goes home with 2 or 3 gorgeous women a week. All the facial aesthetics in the world can't beat an epic personality when it comes to getting laid.

 

[studentp0x]

The most successful guy I've ever known when it comes to getting laid is fairly unattractive but charismatic as all hell. Dude is overweight and bald, in his mid-30s, and still goes home with 2 or 3 gorgeous women a week. All the facial aesthetics in the world can't beat an epic personality when it comes to getting laid.

Yea but those guys are outliers and you're more likely to be good looking than have a personality like that. Also you have to endlessly worry about sustaining your attitude 24/7.

 

[Mad Jack]

Yea but those guys are outliers and you're more likely to be good looking than have a personality like that. Also you have to endlessly worry about sustaining your attitude 24/7.

The guy doesn't worry about anything. It just is who he is. You don't worry about being yourself lol.

 

[Seth Joo]

I meant that the whole thing about guys dating above their league is largely uncommon. The other way around though holds true.
Height matters. Money matters. But nothing is as important as face and then body.

I have seen some very busted dudes with beautiful women, and I have heard of good looking women who have turned away good looking men for something less attractive. If you are a good looking guy you can be quite successful with attracting women and she will know it.

A lot of women want a man they can "control and leash".

 

[studentp0x]

I have seen some very busted dudes with beautiful women, and I have heard of good looking women who have turned away good looking men for something less attractive. If you are a good looking guy you can be quite successful with attracting women and she will know it.

A lot of women want a man they can "control and leash".

It's ridiculous to think that such women would be faithful for even a week. I rarely see a guy dating a much hotter girl, whenever I hear of these cases it's always an average guy with a slightly above average girl who's extremely overrated. So on the large scale, most people will only obtain with 1-2 points of their own looks.

 

[studentp0x]

The guy doesn't worry about anything. It just is who he is. You don't worry about being yourself lol.

Ah yea i was referring to the guys who try to use "game" a lot to simulate those unique personalities. I find those types of guys are far more rare than good looking guys are.

 

[Seth Joo]

It's ridiculous to think that such women would be faithful for even a week. I rarely see a guy dating a much hotter girl, whenever I hear of these cases it's always an average guy with a slightly above average girl who's extremely overrated. So on the large scale, most people will only obtain with 1-2 points of their own looks.

One of the big reasons why a lot of Asian guys have trouble with women is their attitude, I am Asian but most people who meet me often say I am atypical, which I consider a strange compliment. Too many Asian dudes have really negative attitudes, not into things like sports and working out, spend a lot of time playing video games and watching anime and doing a lot of dorky stuff.

Ever seen that Six Pack Shortcuts guy, him and his partner are not tall guys, but they get a ton of women, and he lives in a conservative part of the country, in Texas. I honestly do not buy his fitness advice which seems to be aimed at very clueless guys but still he gets women and is not a tall fella.

 

[studentp0x]

One of the big reasons why a lot of Asian guys have trouble with women is their attitude, I am Asian but most people who meet me often say I am atypical, which I consider a strange compliment. Too many Asian dudes have really negative attitudes, not into things like sports and working out, spend a lot of time playing video games and watching anime and doing a lot of dorky stuff.

Ever seen that Six Pack Shortcuts guy, him and his partner are not tall guys, but they get a ton of women, and he lives in a conservative part of the country, in Texas. I honestly do not buy his fitness advice which seems to be aimed at very clueless guys but still he gets women and is not a tall fella.

This is definitely true yes. Bad attitude = automatic loss.

 

[Birdstrike]

Have you ever considered hanging out with guys who are successful with women? Not lame stuff like 'gambits' or pick-up artists.

Simply hang out with guys who get it. They'll probably bust your balls (typo, err.. toughen you up) a little but over time you'll figure out what's wrong.

And he could also start by watching the movie Swingers.

 

[Seth Joo]

This is definitely true yes. Bad attitude = automatic loss.

I noticed among many Asians that the a lot of guys just have poor attitudes. Back in the old country women will accept it but in America its very different.

 

[touchpause13]

I think having a bad attitude is a deal breaker for most people. Why invite negativity into your life?

Being into nerdy stuff isn't a big deal IMO, just find a girl who is into that too. Or someone who is at least receptive to it

 

[Seth Joo]

I think having a bad attitude is a deal breaker for most people. Why invite negativity into your life?

Being into nerdy stuff isn't a big deal IMO, just find a girl who is into that too. Or someone who is at least receptive to it

Bruce Lee was the most bad ass man on the planet when he was alive and he stood 5'7" and weighed 150 pounds, and was Asian. He was still able to attract women and that was during a far less enlightened time in America. So I really think someone complaining that being Asian is holding them back in America in the year 2014, really has something that he is not telling us.

 

[bobow98]

Minorly off topic: Has anyone read the Bluest Eye by Toni Morison? I remember having to read that in college.

 

[punkedoutriffs]

Bruce Lee was the most bad ass man on the planet when he was alive and he stood 5'7" and weighed 150 pounds, and was Asian. He was still able to attract women and that was during a far less enlightened time in America. So I really think someone complaining that being Asian is holding them back in America in the year 2014, really has something that he is not telling us.

He was actually 135 lbs.

 

[studentp0x]

I think having a bad attitude is a deal breaker for most people. Why invite negativity into your life?

Being into nerdy stuff isn't a big deal IMO, just find a girl who is into that too. Or someone who is at least receptive to it

Pretty much. Though attractiveness can be a deal breaker

Bruce Lee was the most bad ass man on the planet when he was alive and he stood 5'7" and weighed 150 pounds, and was Asian. He was still able to attract women and that was during a far less enlightened time in America. So I really think someone complaining that being Asian is holding them back in America in the year 2014, really has something that he is not telling us.

I personally havent looked into race and how it affects things. What matters though (a lot) is your face. If anything face matters more for men than it does for women. Take it from someone who's around funny, tall and massive/jacked guys all the time.. it doesn't get you women if your face isn't up to par. Im not trying to be negative or rude, I think it's just reality. An average looking woman with a top notch body will get insane male attention whereas the male version will get minimal attention.

 

[ShortDoctor]

Pretty much. Though attractiveness can be a deal breaker

I personally havent looked into race and how it affects things. What matters though (a lot) is your face. If anything face matters more for men than it does for women. Take it from someone who's around funny, tall and massive/jacked guys all the time.. it doesn't get you women if your face isn't up to par. Im not trying to be negative or rude, I think it's just reality. An average looking woman with a top notch body will get insane male attention whereas the male version will get minimal attention.

http://edinburgh.tab.co.uk/2014/11/18/matched-black-tinder/

But the 20-year-old was hugely disappointed when she realised he was only 5’7″:

“It’s a big no-go for me as I’m 6’1″.”

And when he started dropping hints about hooking up: “It’d be so awkward! I couldn’t do that. Imagine kissing him when you’re my height.”

It didn’t stop the international rugby player from trying. He sent her a string of messages including “My hotel is in Old Town” and “We fly out on Sunday.”

But his height was a dealbreaker.

Stories like this...

 

[touchpause13]

http://edinburgh.tab.co.uk/2014/11/18/matched-black-tinder/

But the 20-year-old was hugely disappointed when she realised he was only 5’7″:

“It’s a big no-go for me as I’m 6’1″.”

And when he started dropping hints about hooking up: “It’d be so awkward! I couldn’t do that. Imagine kissing him when you’re my height.”

It didn’t stop the international rugby player from trying. He sent her a string of messages including “My hotel is in Old Town” and “We fly out on Sunday.”

But his height was a dealbreaker.

Stories like this...

Because she's 6'1. try and imagine how difficult it is for a tall lady to date.

Seriously just find a girl who is your height or shorter

 

[Seth Joo]

He was actually 135 lbs.

That makes my point even more, because the guy who started this thread saying being an Asian is keeping him back in the dating game. Bruce Lee was small compared to most American men during his time, and people were way more conservative about race during Lee's days.

Bruce Lee was only 5'7" but was highly regarded as an action movie hero during the time when most action heroes were 6 feet + and 200 lbs.

Bruce Lee worked as a bus boy in the late 1960s and was able to get a lady, but apparently this guy is a doctor and has never even been kissed by a woman in the year 2014. There is something he is not telling us. LOL.

 

[ShortDoctor]

Because she's 6'1. try and imagine how difficult it is for a tall lady to date.

Seriously just find a girl who is your height or shorter

Can we at least agree that it's difficult for her not because of rejection but rather because she chooses not to date shorter guys. There is a difference right TP? Shorter guys like myself are interested both in taller and shorter women, it doesn't really matter. But as men they expect us to approach and they decide. So you say it's difficult for a tall woman because she has to reject short men (socially, psychologically, etc), but as a short man who has faced nothing but rejection, you tell me to stop whining and man up.

Try and imagine how difficult it is for a 5'5 Asian male to date. You won't I know.

 

[ShortDoctor]

That makes my point even more, because the guy who started this thread saying being an Asian is keeping him back in the dating game. Bruce Lee was small compared to most American men during his time, and people were way more conservative about race during Lee's days.

Bruce Lee was only 5'7" but was highly regarded as an action movie hero during the time when most action heroes were 6 feet + and 200 lbs.

Bruce Lee worked as a bus boy in the late 1960s and was able to get a lady, but apparently this guy is a doctor and has never even been kissed by a woman in the year 2014. There is something he is not telling us. LOL.

Thanks for laughing at my situation. That's really helpful. Maybe height means more in 2014 than the 1960s. Maybe hypergamy is a bigger deal in this modernized society with social media. If you deny that it's hard for a short asian man to date in America currently then maybe you should reconsider a career as a physician; your observation and critical thinking skills probably aren't there.

 

[touchpause13]

Can we at least agree that it's difficult for her not because of rejection but rather because she chooses not to date shorter guys. There is a difference right TP? Shorter guys like myself are interested both in taller and shorter women, it doesn't really matter. But as men they expect us to approach and they decide. So you say it's difficult for a tall woman because she has to reject short men (socially, psychologically, etc), but as a short man who has faced nothing but rejection, you tell me to stop whining and man up.

Try and imagine how difficult it is for a 5'5 Asian male to date. You won't I know.

It's difficult for a tall girl to find a mate if she's attracted to taller guys, there's just a smaller pool of people which makes it more difficult. 6 inches a pretty huge height difference too. I've never minded kissing down, but personal preference you know.

I never told you to stop whining and "man up" (I don't use language like that). I do believe that you are putting way too much emphasize on your height and race. Those aren't the only reasons you are being rejected. I know it's easier to blame your lack of success with women on non-modifiable traits, but I think you should take a serious look at what things you can change if you want to do better. Like others have said, hit the gym, and change your attitude.

 

[touchpause13]

Minorly off topic: Has anyone read the Bluest Eye by Toni Morison? I remember having to read that in college.

It's on my to read list. I've read other works by her though

 

[bobow98]

It's on my to read list. I've read other works by her though

It's a worthwhile quick read. Illustrates this societies sort of brainwashing kids from an early age to love only blue eyes and blonde hair fair skin etc etc

 

[punkedoutriffs]

Thanks for laughing at my situation. That's really helpful. Maybe height means more in 2014 than the 1960s. Maybe hypergamy is a bigger deal in this modernized society with social media. If you deny that it's hard for a short asian man to date in America currently then maybe you should reconsider a career as a physician; your observation and critical thinking skills probably aren't there.

I'm disappointed it took this long for SDN's own Godwin's law to take effect.

 

[touchpause13]

It's a worthwhile quick read. Illustrates this societies sort of brainwashing kids from an early age to love only blue eyes and blonde hair fair skin etc etc

Funny thing is I always hated my light eyes, blonde hair, fair skin. Society is weird.

 

[ShortDoctor]

It's difficult for a tall girl to find a mate if she's attracted to taller guys, there's just a smaller pool of people which makes it more difficult. 6 inches a pretty huge height difference too. I've never minded kissing down, but personal preference you know.

I never told you to stop whining and "man up" (I don't use language like that). I do believe that you are putting way too much emphasize on your height and race. Those aren't the only reasons you are being rejected. I know it's easier to blame your lack of success with women on non-modifiable traits, but I think you should take a serious look at what things you can change if you want to do better. Like others have said, hit the gym, and change your attitude.

How depressed do you think I'll be if I hit the gym, spend all my time getting jacked, change my attitude and still can't find anyone? I find it funny that you refuse to admit that the dating pool for a short asian male is considerably less than almost any other group? Certainly less than tall women correct?

 

[touchpause13]

How depressed do you think I'll be if I hit the gym, spend all my time getting jacked, change my attitude and still can't find anyone? I find it funny that you refuse to admit that the dating pool for a short asian male is considerably less than almost any other group? Certainly less than tall women correct?

So you don't want to try to improve yourself because you might fail? That's what I'm getting here.
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take dude.

And no I don't see how the dating pool for a short Asian male is considerably less than any other group. Have you forgotten that gay people exist - because that dating pool is tiny

 

[ShortDoctor]

So you don't want to try to improve yourself because you might fail? That's what I'm getting here.
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take dude.

And no I don't see how the dating pool for a short Asian male is considerably less than any other group. Have you forgotten that gay people exist - because that dating pool is tiny

It's less for a short asian male because it is harder to find someone attracted to you. So you feel sympathy for the tall woman's difficulties, but nothing but contempt for my own struggles. Not sure whether that's your own privilege or ignorance.

 

[touchpause13]

It's less because it is harder to find someone attracted to you. So you feel sympathy for the tall woman's difficulties, but nothing but contempt for my own struggles. Not sure whether that's your own privilege or ignorance.

I don't feel contempt for you. I think you have a lot more control over your situation than what you think.

 

[ShortDoctor]

I don't feel contempt for you. I think you have a lot more control over your situation than what you think.

Answer my question. I'm curious, who has it harder- a short asian male or a tall woman? The fact that you don't acknowledge my difficulties even once in this thread is interesting.

 

[touchpause13]

Answer my question. I'm curious, who has it harder- a short asian male or a tall woman? The fact that you don't acknowledge my difficulties even once in this thread is interesting.

Apples and Oranges
I don't play the who has it worse game (because the answer is always a Native American lesbian disabled woman)

 

[ShortDoctor]

Apples and Oranges
I don't play the who has it worse game (because the answer is always a Native American lesbian disabled woman)

So you don't acknowledge any difficulties a short asian male will face in dating? Why?

 

[touchpause13]

So you don't acknowledge any difficulties a short asian male will face in dating? Why?

Jesus

I don't think being short and Asian is the only reason you are having difficulty. This conversation is proof of that.

 

[ShortDoctor]

Jesus

I don't think being short and Asian is the only reason you are having difficulty. This conversation is proof of that.

No you refuse for whatever reason to acknowledge that being short and asian hurts me in the dating game because it will highlight how women's preferences can be shallow in regards to height and race. Instead you blame me for my failures. I agree with you that no one can control their preferences but damn can you at least concede that it is hard out their for a short asian in the dating world

 

[punkedoutriffs]

Answer my question. I'm curious, who has it harder- a short asian male or a tall woman? The fact that you don't acknowledge my difficulties even once in this thread is interesting.

I too once found it frustrating, actually scratch that, I still find it frustrating when someone (especially those w/ white privilege who take it for granted) doesn't understand or refuse to admit how difficult it is for Asian guys to date here in America, as if admitting or acknowledging somehow undermines their notion that the success they've had can simply be owed to their inherent good qualities as a human being, rather than the fact that they just drew the long straw in the context of our current cultural dynamics.

My best friend growing up was a tall (6' 1"), good looking white guy who, as a person, wasn't really that different from me. However, as we went through middle and high school together, the contrasting success we had in the social realm became increasingly apparent, and the subtle undercurrent of race was always a determining factor. I talked to him many times about it over the years, and through that time, he's understood... to a degree. I used to get very frustrated with him. I don't anymore, because I don't think he'll ever understand to the full extent that I do, and why should he?

However, here's something I learned from that experience: you'll never convince enough people to solve the problem. Hell, I couldn't convince even one person, and we've been best friends for nearly 15 years. What will you accomplish by convincing touchpause of the legitimacy of your difficulties? You'll still be alone, which really isn't that bad if you don't look at it as a failure to meet expectations that you now have to justify to anyone who will (or won't) listen.

It took me years to make it so that this weight wasn't constantly on my shoulders, so that I didn't feel like I needed to prove myself to everyone. All it really takes is to forget about all that and just live your life and do what you like to do and doing it without expectations. Do you like going to the gym? Yes? Then do that. If not, then do something you do like. It'll take time, but if you don't make this change, you'll spend your entire life just walking this godawful plank. Trust me dude, I've been there.

 

[ShortDoctor]

I too once found it frustrating, actually scratch that, I still find it frustrating when someone (especially those w/ white privilege who take it for granted) doesn't understand or refuse to admit how difficult it is for Asian guys to date here in America, as if admitting or acknowledging somehow undermines their notion that the success they've had can simply be owed to their inherent good qualities as a human being, rather than the fact that they just drew the long straw in the context of our current cultural dynamics.

My best friend growing up was a tall (6' 1"), good looking white guy who, as a person, wasn't really that different from me. However, as we went through middle and high school together, the contrasting success we had in the social realm became increasingly apparent, and the subtle undercurrent of race was always a determining factor. I talked to him many times about it over the years, and through that time, he's understood... to a degree. I used to get very frustrated with him. I don't anymore, because I don't think he'll ever understand to the full extent that I do, and why should he?

However, here's something I learned from that experience: you'll never convince enough people to solve the problem. Hell, I couldn't convince even one person, and we've been best friends for nearly 15 years. What will you accomplish by convincing touchpause of the legitimacy of your difficulties? You'll still be alone, which really isn't that bad if you don't look at it as a failure to meet expectations that you now have to justify to anyone who will (or won't) listen.

It took me years to make it so that this weight wasn't constantly on my shoulders, so that I didn't feel like I needed to prove myself to everyone. All it really takes is to forget about all that and just live your life and do what you like to do and doing it without expectations. Do you like going to the gym? Yes? Then do that. If not, then do something you do like. It'll take time, but if you don't make this change, you'll spend your entire life just walking this godawful plank. Trust me dude, I've been there.

True. It's frustrating though because she with all her privilege is giving advice by blaming it all solely on me, saying that the only reason I can't date is because of my attitude and effort, not even once acknowledging that being short and asian puts me at a severe disadvantage (watch how she'll change the story by saying everyone has problems completely ignoring my question or response, going in circles)

 

[punkedoutriffs]

True. It's frustrating though because she with all her privilege is giving advice by blaming it all solely on me, saying that the only reason I can't date is because of my attitude and effort, not even once acknowledging that being short and asian puts me at a severe disadvantage (watch how she'll change the story by saying everyone has problems completely ignoring my question or response, going in circles)

Yes, I've found that most people either contradict you, deflect, or at best, blandly take your word for it. In all my years of complaining about this, I have never ONCE gotten a cathartic acknowledgement from someone. I don't know why.

 

[touchpause13]

No you refuse for whatever reason to acknowledge that being short and asian hurts me in the dating game because it will highlight how women's preferences can be shallow in regards to height and race. Instead you blame me for my failures. I agree with you that no one can control their preferences but damn can you at least concede that it is hard out their for a short asian in the dating world

I never said that being Asian and short isn't difficult in the dating game

I said it's not the ONLY reason why you are having trouble

 

[touchpause13]

True. It's frustrating though because she with all her privilege is giving advice by blaming it all solely on me, saying that the only reason I can't date is because of my attitude and effort, not even once acknowledging that being short and asian puts me at a severe disadvantage (watch how she'll change the story by saying everyone has problems completely ignoring my question or response, going in circles)

Never said that.

Keep saying what makes you feel better tho bro

 

[studentp0x]

Answer my question. I'm curious, who has it harder- a short asian male or a tall woman? The fact that you don't acknowledge my difficulties even once in this thread is interesting.

A decent looking tall girl has it easier than the best looking 6'3 man. So it makes no sense to compare men and women like that.

 

[studentp0x]

True. It's frustrating though because she with all her privilege is giving advice by blaming it all solely on me, saying that the only reason I can't date is because of my attitude and effort, not even once acknowledging that being short and asian puts me at a severe disadvantage (watch how she'll change the story by saying everyone has problems completely ignoring my question or response, going in circles)

What's up with blaming your race or height? The number one thing guys should blame is their face... everything else is a distant second.
We all love to play around with things like "confidence" / "personality" when those things are relatively meaningless in comparison to how you look. Same with height...

 

[Seth Joo]

Thanks for laughing at my situation. That's really helpful. Maybe height means more in 2014 than the 1960s. Maybe hypergamy is a bigger deal in this modernized society with social media. If you deny that it's hard for a short asian man to date in America currently then maybe you should reconsider a career as a physician; your observation and critical thinking skills probably aren't there.

LOL. I was just mentioning someone who had a much bigger handicap than you, Bruce Lee, was not a doctor, worked odd jobs when he lived in America, lived during a time when racism was far worse than it is today. I am talking about the late 1960s yet managed to marry a white American wife and produced two children with her.

I have a friend who just happens to be short and Asian and is married, he is also a doctor.

Your negativity is what is holding you back more than anything else. There are men of other races who have it tough as well.

There are some ways that dating is more difficult today, and there are other ways its easier.

I mentioned that I am of Asian background myself, and I know that many Asian guys here in America just do not have the right kind of attitude to date in this culture.

I read a blog by a white guy (he is actually Middle Eastern but appears white) who in my estimate is well over 6 feet tall and paints a very bleak picture of the American dating scene.

Actually height meant more in the 60s than it did today. I noticed many of the famous marquee actors of those days were taller than today's "stars".

 

[ShortDoctor]

LOL. I was just mentioning someone who had a much bigger handicap than you, Bruce Lee, was not a doctor, worked odd jobs when he lived in America, lived during a time when racism was far worse than it is today. I am talking about the late 1960s yet managed to marry a white American wife and produced two children with her.

I have a friend who just happens to be short and Asian and is married, he is also a doctor.

Your negativity is what is holding you back more than anything else.

There are some ways that dating is more difficult today, and there are other ways its easier.

I mentioned that I am of Asian background myself, and I know that many Asian guys here in America just do not have the right kind of attitude to date in this culture.

So what are steps I can take to find myself in the same position as your friend? If you don't mind, give me concrete steps of what I have to do instead of generalized platitutdes