Should I mention a Fight in my personal statement?? I'm at a crossroads

[Swickly]

I was out as a Junior in undergrad over winter break downtown in Philadelphia near Temple... A fight broke out between someone I was with and another kid, then a brawl ensued... I ended up getting sucker punched in the face, going to the ER.. Blah blah and had to get surgery... I had been drinking a little, but i wasn't going to mention it.. I want to mention the experience because there are some insights I can write referring to being a patient and Emergency care in general, but most importantly I want to cycle back to another experience I had as a Sr in college....

I was out a night before one of my Football Games (wasn't drinking) and I saw this kid who was severly intoxicated get pushed down the steps outside a bar.. i'm not sure if he split his head open, but next thing I knew he was surrounded in a pool of blood, and people were just staring.. so i just went over and knelt down and held the kid, in his blood and all, and was just being empathic towards him telling him it's going to be okay, and that I know how he is feeling... he eventually passed out and was taken by EMS...

I wanted to use these experiences and talk about empathy, and how important it is in the care of another individual, about connecting with people through common experiences etc..... But I'm afraid to seem like a punk because I was involved in a fight, even though it is something that many people have experienced at one time or another.. I love the way my PS is coming together conceptually, but I'm afraid that it may be a turn off that I was involved in a fight..... any ideas?

Thanks

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[crossfit4lyfe]

I personally think it sounds interesting, really just depends on how you word the fight. Maybe you could word it as you found yourself in the midst of a bar brawl and when attempting to leave you suffered a blow to the face, idk!

 

[pyrrion89]

Don't say you got in a bar brawl. Say you were assaulted and leave it at that.

 

[TexasSurgeon]

I was out as a Junior in undergrad over winter break downtown in Philadelphia near Temple... A fight broke out between someone I was with and another kid, then a brawl ensued... I ended up getting sucker punched in the face, going to the ER.. Blah blah and had to get surgery... I had been drinking a little, but i wasn't going to mention it.. I want to mention the experience because there are some insights I can write referring to being a patient and Emergency care in general, but most importantly I want to cycle back to another experience I had as a Sr in college....

I was out a night before one of my Football Games (wasn't drinking) and I saw this kid who was severly intoxicated get pushed down the steps outside a bar.. i'm not sure if he split his head open, but next thing I knew he was surrounded in a pool of blood, and people were just staring.. so i just went over and knelt down and held the kid, in his blood and all, and was just being empathic towards him telling him it's going to be okay, and that I know how he is feeling... he eventually passed out and was taken by EMS...

I wanted to use these experiences and talk about empathy, and how important it is in the care of another individual, about connecting with people through common experiences etc..... But I'm afraid to seem like a punk because I was involved in a fight, even though it is something that many people have experienced at one time or another.. I love the way my PS is coming together conceptually, but I'm afraid that it may be a turn off that I was involved in a fight..... any ideas?

Thanks

Whatever story you use, say it, and then move on. Don't let the sob story mold your entire application. It can be listed, but don't keep referring back to it, because a lot of people have them and officers are likely to be bored of seeing so many.

 

[Goro]

Does this explain "Who am I?" and "Why Medicine?"

I was out as a Junior in undergrad over winter break downtown in Philadelphia near Temple... A fight broke out between someone I was with and another kid, then a brawl ensued... I ended up getting sucker punched in the face, going to the ER.. Blah blah and had to get surgery... I had been drinking a little, but i wasn't going to mention it.. I want to mention the experience because there are some insights I can write referring to being a patient and Emergency care in general, but most importantly I want to cycle back to another experience I had as a Sr in college....

I was out a night before one of my Football Games (wasn't drinking) and I saw this kid who was severly intoxicated get pushed down the steps outside a bar.. i'm not sure if he split his head open, but next thing I knew he was surrounded in a pool of blood, and people were just staring.. so i just went over and knelt down and held the kid, in his blood and all, and was just being empathic towards him telling him it's going to be okay, and that I know how he is feeling... he eventually passed out and was taken by EMS...

I wanted to use these experiences and talk about empathy, and how important it is in the care of another individual, about connecting with people through common experiences etc..... But I'm afraid to seem like a punk because I was involved in a fight, even though it is something that many people have experienced at one time or another.. I love the way my PS is coming together conceptually, but I'm afraid that it may be a turn off that I was involved in a fight..... any ideas?

Thanks

 

[mimelim]

I would not mention that you were in a bar brawl or even in a bar in an application. There isn't anything wrong about going to a bar, but unless it is fundamental to the story and as @Goro says, explains "Who am I?" or "Why Medicine?", there is no place for it in an application.

 

[zero0]

Dude, no. Your goal is to come off as a professional to these people.

 

[azumzz]

You are probably trying to gain points by having been the guy who tries to break the fight up. Although this is a cool thing to do, it is too risky IMO. A good rule of thumb is to not be risky on your applications.

If someone takes it the right way, you might gain a few points
If someone takes it the wrong way, you will lose a lot of points.

If all you want to do is talk about the ER scene, then just say that you suffered a facial injury and take it from there. Maybe say something like: I learned some cool thing from EM. When I was 19, I was rushed to the emergency room after suffering a facial injury...
hmm, that might be a red flag too, I dunno lol

 

[PlaqueBuster]

The example is weak in my opinion unless you fluff it. All you did was kneel down and tell him it would be ok. I don't think that is really empathy so take Goro's advice and stick to the Why Medicine question. It seems like you did not call 911, give him any aid, etc. That would be worthy of a story.

 

[Swickly]

Yeah I think I'm throwing this ball in the trash and restarting.. Thanks guys

 

[Doug Underhill]

Not unless you're the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and need to explain how you arrived at your circumstances.

 

[xffan624]

Not unless you're the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and need to explain how you arrived at your circumstances.

You would have to do it in rap form though. Now there would be a unique personal statement.

 

[bweild]

Don't mention the fight. I think that if that event where you comforted the kid was truly something that sparked an interest in medicine, and you can explain that and where it led you in terms of future experiences and who you are as a person, then yeah, by all means use it. I guess this is essentially what Goro said but with more words But if you're just looking something that smells like empathy...

 

[baxt1412]

we should really start encouraging this type of stuff to help our chances

 

[Swickly]

Nice dude. lmao

 

[ridethecliche]

5/10