This will not be forgotten; my death will not be silent

[reluctantoptimism]

Life was not meant to be this meaningless and painful.

This all ends tonight!

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[Promethean]

Please push away from the computer and get some real help. Seriously, please call someone. Anyone.

 

[Miss_Premed]

1-800-273-8255

National suicide hotline

Please call!

 

[Incis0r]

Hey there,

I admit that I do not know you, but a quick glance at your thread history taught me something about you- You are a persistent, dedicated, and strong person:

2 Years volunteering at a local youth center
Shadowed 2 physicians for a total of about 4 months
Research for about 1.5 years
Honors college student/ club member
Helped my school place first in a national conference
Honors Thesis
Active at the med school in which I intend to apply (undergrad program)
Did some ER volunteer work
Volunteer work at a health clinic

I've also got assurances from 4 professor (and a volunteer coordinator) that they will be writing strong LORs: 2 science professors, 1 PI (I also took classes with him), a social sciences professor, my premed committee and a coordinator.

Just, bear with me. Take a look at the academic history you have- It's so amazing. You've done so much. I don't know about your personal life but your academic life seems good. I don't know what happened with you that has made you feel so hopeless, but remember that moods are constantly shifting and are just temporary. Just take some time and reflect over all your successes.

There are times when I get some bad news and I feel down as well, but it is at these times that we must recognize the privileges (i.e. we are not dying from a terminal illness, we have electricity, we can access clean water, we have resources, etc.) and get some perspective on just how good we have it already in life. And we must move forward, even when it feels tough.

I KNOW that you have a BRIGHT FUTURE ahead of you. If you want to talk, feel free to reach out to me. But please, don't do this to yourself.

 

[Zelda840]

Forget about your app. You are more than your med school application. If you had it in you to want to be a physician, on some level you want to help people. You are people, and you are worth saving. I am no substitute for a professional, which you absolutely need to contact AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, but am always available as well if you just need someone to talk to.

 

[reluctantoptimism]

It's not going to matter. I have an IA where the narrative has been embellished to the point where no one will every accept me. If I apply to med school (what I want) or grad school, I'm sure I'll be rejected everywhere.

Someone suggested that I wait seven years to apply but what am I supposed to do in the interim? I have no one helping me or supporting me and I cannot find work. No matter what I do, I never seem to find contentment. I just don't how things will ever improve.