[Sweet Sixteen] Most deserving student to be admitted...

I'm scared of bears with hearts on them. Predator wins!

TheRealMD said:

Predator wins!

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It's an alien...

My vote goes to the carebear. He's a cutie and let's face it, in today's world, looks open doors.

Alien.
Pros:
-Shear determination (i.e. the ability to jump blindly into gunfire) in will do it well in medical school when faced with horrific amounts of material.
-Already intimately familiar with human anatomy.

the bear on the other hand appears to be predisposed to a depressive disorder which may be aggravated in the stress of a medical school environment.

Quix said:

You fail science fiction; I may have to discount your vote.

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Oops. I knew it was one of the two.

alien, he does not need a dissection kit. plus the bear is furry, which could be a problem in surgery if it sheds some fur, alien is slick.

Quix said:

You fail science fiction; I may have to discount your vote.

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ymnCheetos said:

The care bear is a serial rapist for sure, Alien doesn't stand a chance.

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Thats the truth!!

The Alien doesn't just have blind determination; the Alien has cunning and violence on his side. He'll be a surgical oncologist and tear those malignant neoplasms to shreds. That will bring great fame and wealth to his tribe/medical school.

Ah yes, the alien. Truly a ferocious beast. Indeed, since the dawn of time itself the alien has been feared for its agility, acid spit and 33 mcat. Truly a formidable foe. But on the other hand we have this seemingly harmless care bear. However, underneath the cute exterior lies a ruthless gunner. Oh furry care bear, why must you trick us so?

Alien FTW.

If I saw the carebear in a dark alley, I would piss my pants. All that happiness and joy is just unnerving....

The alien has a built in scalpel, ideal for a surgical residency after med school. Also has a no nonsense attitude that will get it through the rigours of a medical career. Not sure what the carebear has going from him, he looks like he's just looking for an opportunity to cry.

Alien

dd128 said:

The alien has a built in scalpel, ideal for a surgical residency after med school.

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The "built in scalpel" isn't removable, and since it cannot be put in an autoclave, it is going to be a huge source of infection. Plus surgeons frown upon bringing your own equipment into the OR, imagine the antibiotic resistant bacteria you could get from a space creature. Try moving around the OR with a long tail and you undoubtedly will contaminate the sterile field, its just not practical. Every med student gets scolded for inadvertently brushing against something and we don't have half the wing/tail span of an alien. And the whole laying eggs inside your patients thing is sure to cost the hospital in liability. So I'd have to go with the creepy bear, once you shave it down and put a mask and gown on it.

Quix said:

This is potentially one of the most disturbing thoughts I've come across in recent memory...

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Hey, you're the one who nominated him/her.

Begaster said:

The carebear, as long as he is not allowed to pursue any pediatric specialties.

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agreed. No one that happy should be around kids, you just know something is not right.

I think that the alien would have a difficult time demonstrating his compassionate side to an adcom. Imagine how difficult it would be for him to have to tell a family bad news.. now a care bear, on the other hand...

...pred all the way

The carebear would care too much. Unable to separate his personal life with his work, he would become attached.

Not to mention, I think the pred might be capable of some innovative surgical techniques.

carebear

Definitely Grumpy Bear, he would make a great pediatrician.

He may have a slight disposition but when a Care Bear Stare is needed he steps up to the plate and really "shines".


I also find it very hard to believe Alien scored an 11 on his verbal, their should probably be some sort of investigation of whether or not he infiltrated someones chest and stole their test during the testing period.

1956Goldtop said:

Also, the care bear could probably sterilize surgical materials with his tummy blast no?

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Tummy blast? How dare you downplay The Care Bear Stare!!

seraph524 said:

If I saw the carebear in a dark alley, I would piss my pants. All that happiness and joy is just unnerving....

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I vote for carebear!

Despite the carebear's outward virtue, I must point out that the alien had repeatedly demonstrated that he's quite nimble and an avid, motivated learner.

Alien, hands down.

Myuuchan said:

Despite the carebear's outward virtue, I must point out that the alien had repeatedly demonstrated that he's quite nimble and an avid, motivated learner.

Alien, hands down.

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Though it's desire to kill anything that moves could could be dangerous around patients...

The alien would kill the carebear and anyone else who opposed his admission to med school.

The only candidate that would even stand a chance against an alien is Arnold or a predator.

Arnold > predator > alien.

Law2Doc said:

The "built in scalpel" isn't removable, and since it cannot be put in an autoclave, it is going to be a huge source of infection. Plus surgeons frown upon bringing your own equipment into the OR, imagine the antibiotic resistant bacteria you could get from a space creature. Try moving around the OR with a long tail and you undoubtedly will contaminate the sterile field, its just not practical. Every med student gets scolded for inadvertently brushing against something and we don't have half the wing/tail span of an alien. And the whole laying eggs inside your patients thing is sure to cost the hospital in liability. So I'd have to go with the creepy bear, once you shave it down and put a mask and gown on it.

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He could easily disinfect his built in scalpel by spitting on it. He could similarly deal with any attending or scrub tech who has the nerve to scold him.

Also, no one has mentioned that Carebear lacks digits. Imagine trying to perform surgery with mittens on. That's just not going to work.

Alien has future chief of surgery written all over him.

Grumpy Bear!! Totally. He showed his humanity, determination and intelligence in The Care Bear Movie so his ECs are clearly superior.

The alien. I really feel that the alien has the coping skills to deal with the stress of med school while I think the care bear would flounder under extreme stress. Most of all though the alien would never have to worry about lawsuits. I mean come on who is going to sue that thing.

Definitely the care bear. Don't you guys know that carebears have like rainbow laser beams coming out of their stomachs? That care bear has a thunder cloud on its stomach. Lightning bolts? Ch'yeah!!

I bet the carebear has an iPwn in its pocket too...

Whatayear said:

The alien. I really feel that the alien has the coping skills to deal with the stress of med school while I think the care bear would flounder under extreme stress. Most of all though the alien would never have to worry about lawsuits. I mean come on who is going to sue that thing.

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i'd argue the opposite actually. the care bear is more in touch with his feelings so he will probably better deal with the stress. plus, as you said patients will probably like him more and who could sue a cute bear?

i imagine that predator would bury all his issues deep down eventually becoming an alcoholic who's hooked on vicodin. i envision him going off the deep end one day and performing surgery while "altered" possibly leading to a negative outcome and a huge lawsuit. that guy's a walking liability.

The more i consider it the more I think they would both make excellent doctors, just in different specialties.

I'm just waiting for the next match-up

Drogba said:

The more i consider it the more I think they would both make excellent doctors, just in different specialties.

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yea, the care bear would be great in psych or maybe primary care.

the predator might be a good fit in path cause he has "built in" instruments and wouldn't have to worry about contamination as much since his patients are dead.

If Xenomorph makes it in, he'll be a success working in an HMO or anyplace that pushes quick patient turn around time, because the patients are going to be just as eager to get out of the room as the company is to reduce the time each spends with the physician.

He can't work in geriatrics, pediatrics, cardiology, or OB/GYN, or psych, though.

Psych because the patients would assume he was part of a hallucination and not cooperate with him.

Geriatrics & cardiology because he'd lose too many patients to heart attacks to stay in business.

OB/GYN because that sucker would have high patient dissatisfaction from him ripping their chests open to lay eggs in them.

Besides, intimidating and threatening interviewers isn't known to lead to acceptance.

The Care Bear isn't a shoe in for acceptance, but after interviewing Xenomorph, any applicant will look good. If he can find the right anti-depressant and therapist, he has a good chance of make it through the next round. I don't even like Care Bears, but given the choice of spending 4 years with a bleeding heart Care Bear, or 4 years trying to avoid being destroyed by Xenomorph, I'll take Care Bear.