Any single parent med school students out there?

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psycho-matic

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I was just wondering if there are any single parents out there who managed to take care of a child and do well in medical school, and still having time to spend with your child. How did you do your clinical rotations? Did you have family nearby to help? I'm asking because there is a strong possibility I could get custody of my 2 yearold son pretty soon. He would be 5 by the time I entered med school, so he'd be in school during the day. I'm just interested in hearing from anyone who's managed to do this.

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I was just wondering if there are any single parents out there who managed to take care of a child and do well in medical school, and still having time to spend with your child. How did you do your clinical rotations? Did you have family nearby to help? I'm asking because there is a strong possibility I could get custody of my 2 yearold son pretty soon. He would be 5 by the time I entered med school, so he'd be in school during the day. I'm just interested in hearing from anyone who's managed to do this.

Hi - not a single medschool mom. I'm married, but one of my close friends is a single mom with full custody of her son. She had her baby shortly before starting med school and she has been handling it a number of ways.
1. She stretched out MS1 into 2 years.
2. She lives near mom and sister who help out.
3. Son goes to daycare
4. She has occasionally sent her son to stay with dad when it was crunch time (ex. 1 week while studying for boards). She has not relied on this much.

We're more than halfway through our 3rd year and she's managing. It's tough though and I can't imagine anyone having a child - married or single - without reliable help and support available.

Pre-clinical years are easier in terms of spending time with your kid. 3rd year is probably the hardest - but it's not like it's always impossible. Generally, you wind up having a tough schedule to manage a day or two at a time. It's not constant. You generally have a decent amount of notice to make plans for it, but sometimes stuff happens. Your kid spikes a fever and can't go to daycare/school, so you have to stay home. Stuff like that. Make sure you have a friend on the administrative faculty who understands your situtation and can work with you to keep things running smoothly.

In terms of studying - use your time wisely. Being a parent generally forces you to learn time management skills. But be forewarned - you can't have everything. If you want to be a good parent, you probably will NOT be able to be the absolute best med student you can be. You need to be willing to come to terms with that possibility. I'm still having a little trouble with it, but less so. I'm starting to have much more realistic expectations of myself and thus am managing to stay sane. I have to settle for being average to slightly above average as opposed to head of the class...
 
Hi - not a single medschool mom. I'm married, but one of my close friends is a single mom with full custody of her son. She had her baby shortly before starting med school and she has been handling it a number of ways.
1. She stretched out MS1 into 2 years.
2. She lives near mom and sister who help out.
3. Son goes to daycare
4. She has occasionally sent her son to stay with dad when it was crunch time (ex. 1 week while studying for boards). She has not relied on this much.

We're more than halfway through our 3rd year and she's managing. It's tough though and I can't imagine anyone having a child - married or single - without reliable help and support available.

Pre-clinical years are easier in terms of spending time with your kid. 3rd year is probably the hardest - but it's not like it's always impossible. Generally, you wind up having a tough schedule to manage a day or two at a time. It's not constant. You generally have a decent amount of notice to make plans for it, but sometimes stuff happens. Your kid spikes a fever and can't go to daycare/school, so you have to stay home. Stuff like that. Make sure you have a friend on the administrative faculty who understands your situtation and can work with you to keep things running smoothly.

In terms of studying - use your time wisely. Being a parent generally forces you to learn time management skills. But be forewarned - you can't have everything. If you want to be a good parent, you probably will NOT be able to be the absolute best med student you can be. You need to be willing to come to terms with that possibility. I'm still having a little trouble with it, but less so. I'm starting to have much more realistic expectations of myself and thus am managing to stay sane. I have to settle for being average to slightly above average as opposed to head of the class...

Thanks for the encouraging advice. I'll actually be a single dad if I get custody of my son soon, which I am really looking foward to. Medical school is something I want to do, but not at the expense of him. We'll just see how things go. My Family is 2 hours away, and I worry about the 3rd and 4th year when he'll have to get to school everday. They wouldn't be able to just get him during the week. I hope it all works out.
 
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