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Anyone else feel this way?--CA-1 woes

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Honeeplz3

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Hey everyone,

I am a CA-1, in the midst of my second month doing anesthesia, and I'm getting concerned that I may have made the wrong career choice. I guess what bothers me most is feeling like I'm in a factory. I get to the hospital at 6, set up the room, preop the first case then it's go go go with no time for breaks in between. I often leave around 5 pm with a total of 45 min break (15 min in the morning and 30 min for lunch). I guess this wouldn't be so bad if I absolutely LOVED what I'm doing, but honestly I'm only in my second month and already feeling like I'm in a rut. A lot of my co-residents on the other hand are having a ball, and I wish I shared their enthusiasm. My program is great (top tier program on the east coast) faculty are amazing, co residents easy to get along with, no issues with surgery attendings or OR staff. I don't feel overwhelmed or inadequate, and attendings have given me positive feedback. Its just that I'm not really enjoying the day to day grind of anesthesia, and I'm worried about feeling this way already. The OR is starting to feel like a prison, making me yearn for the good ol intern days.

Has anyone ever felt this way and then grew to love it?

Btw it's really not my thing to go to an anonymous forum, but I don't want to ask my co-residents/faculty because I don't want anyone in the department to think I'm unhappy or ungrateful. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
 

Doctor4Life1769

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Hey everyone,

I am a CA-1, in the midst of my second month doing anesthesia, and I'm getting concerned that I may have made the wrong career choice. I guess what bothers me most is feeling like I'm in a factory. I get to the hospital at 6, set up the room, preop the first case then it's go go go with no time for breaks in between. I often leave around 5 pm with a total of 45 min break (15 min in the morning and 30 min for lunch). I guess this wouldn't be so bad if I absolutely LOVED what I'm doing, but honestly I'm only in my second month and already feeling like I'm in a rut. A lot of my co-residents on the other hand are having a ball, and I wish I shared their enthusiasm. My program is great (top tier program on the east coast) faculty are amazing, co residents easy to get along with, no issues with surgery attendings or OR staff. I don't feel overwhelmed or inadequate, and attendings have given me positive feedback. Its just that I'm not really enjoying the day to day grind of anesthesia, and I'm worried about feeling this way already. The OR is starting to feel like a prison, making me yearn for the good ol intern days.

Has anyone ever felt this way and then grew to love it?

Btw it's really not my thing to go to an anonymous forum, but I don't want to ask my co-residents/faculty because I don't want anyone in the department to think I'm unhappy or ungrateful. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

I felt that way too
No longer doing it and switched to FM, really enjoy it
 
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deleted171991

Yes, I did. Even if you are a morning person, it can be tough in a big box hospital. It can feel like an assembly lane in a factory. I also enjoyed my internship more than my residency on a day-to-day basis. Anesthesia residency treats you like a tech, not a doctor, and that's tough to swallow. It's even worse than a surgical residency from that standpoint.

Will it get better? It's tough to say. It will definitely become more routine, and you'll care less about a number of things and enjoy it much more in 3-6 months.

You did a medical internship, didn't you? ;)
 
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WholeLottaGame7

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Hey everyone,

I am a CA-1, in the midst of my second month doing anesthesia, and I'm getting concerned that I may have made the wrong career choice. I guess what bothers me most is feeling like I'm in a factory. I get to the hospital at 6, set up the room, preop the first case then it's go go go with no time for breaks in between. I often leave around 5 pm with a total of 45 min break (15 min in the morning and 30 min for lunch). I guess this wouldn't be so bad if I absolutely LOVED what I'm doing, but honestly I'm only in my second month and already feeling like I'm in a rut. A lot of my co-residents on the other hand are having a ball, and I wish I shared their enthusiasm. My program is great (top tier program on the east coast) faculty are amazing, co residents easy to get along with, no issues with surgery attendings or OR staff. I don't feel overwhelmed or inadequate, and attendings have given me positive feedback. Its just that I'm not really enjoying the day to day grind of anesthesia, and I'm worried about feeling this way already. The OR is starting to feel like a prison, making me yearn for the good ol intern days.

Has anyone ever felt this way and then grew to love it?

Btw it's really not my thing to go to an anonymous forum, but I don't want to ask my co-residents/faculty because I don't want anyone in the department to think I'm unhappy or ungrateful. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

The first few months of CA-1 year are mentally exhausting. You're doing something almost entirely new, you can't really let your guard down at all, and sometimes you feel all by yourself surrounded by surgeons and nurses.

It definitely gets a lot better, but it could also be that it's not the right fit. I would say maybe see if life is any better in the 2nd half of CA-1 year, and if not, consider switching.
 

anes121508

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Hey everyone,

I am a CA-1, in the midst of my second month doing anesthesia, and I'm getting concerned that I may have made the wrong career choice. I guess what bothers me most is feeling like I'm in a factory. I get to the hospital at 6, set up the room, preop the first case then it's go go go with no time for breaks in between. I often leave around 5 pm with a total of 45 min break (15 min in the morning and 30 min for lunch). I guess this wouldn't be so bad if I absolutely LOVED what I'm doing, but honestly I'm only in my second month and already feeling like I'm in a rut. A lot of my co-residents on the other hand are having a ball, and I wish I shared their enthusiasm. My program is great (top tier program on the east coast) faculty are amazing, co residents easy to get along with, no issues with surgery attendings or OR staff. I don't feel overwhelmed or inadequate, and attendings have given me positive feedback. Its just that I'm not really enjoying the day to day grind of anesthesia, and I'm worried about feeling this way already. The OR is starting to feel like a prison, making me yearn for the good ol intern days.

Has anyone ever felt this way and then grew to love it?

Btw it's really not my thing to go to an anonymous forum, but I don't want to ask my co-residents/faculty because I don't want anyone in the department to think I'm unhappy or ungrateful. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!


I completely understand this feeling.....CA1 year can be really tough because of things people already mentioned earlier (mental exhaustion and frustration of not knowing much at all - all the little things that you just have to learn how to do - as simple as troubleshooting your monitor). BUT BUT BUT if your negative feelings towards anesthesia are about being trapped in the OR and the day to day grind and NOT the fumbling around as a CA-1, then it could be a long three years. The truth is that the day to day work during anesthesia residency can be exhausting (hustling around flipping rooms) if you have ton's of cases OR give you a sense of imprisonment if you have one long a** crani all day. Life as an attending though changes (if you are supervising).
 

Planktonmd

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The bulk of anesthesia work is routine boring nursing level activities.
The reason why you feel clueless initially is because you were never a nurse, you never hung IV bags, charted vitals, measured urine, or charted medications given...
The days of you writing an order in the chart and walking away are over!
 
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Twiggidy

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Welcome to Anesthesiology........

As a side note, aside from all the snark that appears on the forums, this is why we tell you guys when you're asking "Is it for me?", "Do I have a chance?", "What's it really like?" to really read the responses.

What you're describing is exactly what your life is going to be like with maybe the exception of doing pain or critical care (which is why many go into those subspecialties). Me, I go to work at six and do a bunch of cases and leave sometimes at 1, sometimes at 2, sometimes a 7. Depending the day if I can squeeze a lunch or break in it's a good day. That's the job. There will be good days and there will be bad days, but mostly there will be just DAYS.
 
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deleted171991

The bulk of anesthesia work is routine boring nursing level activities.
The reason why you feel clueless initially is because you were never a nurse, you never hung IV bags, charted vitals, measured urine, or charted medications given...
The days of you writing an order in the chart and walking away are over!
Unless you go into critical care. Then you'll feel like a doctor again.
 
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Honeeplz3

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Thank you all so much for your responses!
The thing is, I don't feel overwhelmed at all (unlike some of my peers) and feel like I've gotten into the rhythm of things pretty easily. While I know I obviously still have a LOT to learn, I haven't found anything to be fascinating so far. It's just so disheartening because a lot of people switch INTO anesthesia, but I don't hear too often of people switching out.

I feel like I may be missing something. My peers think the job is great (or so it seems...they probably think I think it's great too because I don't want to complain and bring others' morale down). Also the thread right above this one is entitled "anesthesia is awesome." I want to feel this way!! Please please correct me if I'm wrong but I feel like most of my work is to set up the room, get the drugs in order, get the pt to the OR, monitors on, intubate, and...rinse and repeat for the majority of cases. I feel like there's not much to it for the vast majority of my day-to-day work...

It's really a sticky situation because if I do want to switch specialties, I am a bit geographically limited due to family factors. Because of this, I would hate to come forward to my PD, try to switch without being able to, and not get my contract renewed for next year effectively leaving me jobless. If I had to stick it out I would and possibly do CC fellowship.
 

Honeeplz3

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If anyone could tell me reasons they love anesthesia I would love to hear it.:p I honestly want to love it so bad. I never thought I would be in this situation.

Right now I feel like a monkey trapped in an OR who works a considerable amount of nights and weekends, which probably won't change too much even when an attending. :eek:
 

aneftp

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My advice (since you are only technically 10 days (July 10th) into your PGY-2 year). And doubt any residency slots opened. If you cannot find another alternative residency slot (what speciality or primary care are you considering?).

If nothing is available....stick it out with anesthesia for 3 months. See how things go.
 
D

deleted171991

If anyone could tell me reasons they love anesthesia I would love to hear it.:p I honestly want to love it so bad. I never thought I would be in this situation.

Right now I feel like a monkey trapped in an OR who works a considerable amount of nights and weekends, which probably won't change too much even when an attending. :eek:
I wouldn't pass judgment until January. It's too early. It might be just cultural shock. You also seem more insightful than the average monkey going into the specialty nowadays, so don't be surprised that you have a different perspective. Also don't expect people to tell you the truth about how they feel; they might be as miserable as you are.

It's not easy being an anesthesia resident in a big box academic OR. It's the dictionary definition of being nobody. Just take one day at a time, one case at a time. Then, if you don't like anesthesia, go for pain or CCM. Switching to another specialty will be more painful than you could imagine (unless the PD wants it, too), especially if your family depends on you.
 
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urge

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Hey everyone,

I am a CA-1, in the midst of my second month doing anesthesia, and I'm getting concerned that I may have made the wrong career choice. I guess what bothers me most is feeling like I'm in a factory. I get to the hospital at 6, set up the room, preop the first case then it's go go go with no time for breaks in between. I often leave around 5 pm with a total of 45 min break (15 min in the morning and 30 min for lunch). I guess this wouldn't be so bad if I absolutely LOVED what I'm doing, but honestly I'm only in my second month and already feeling like I'm in a rut. A lot of my co-residents on the other hand are having a ball, and I wish I shared their enthusiasm. My program is great (top tier program on the east coast) faculty are amazing, co residents easy to get along with, no issues with surgery attendings or OR staff. I don't feel overwhelmed or inadequate, and attendings have given me positive feedback. Its just that I'm not really enjoying the day to day grind of anesthesia, and I'm worried about feeling this way already. The OR is starting to feel like a prison, making me yearn for the good ol intern days.

Has anyone ever felt this way and then grew to love it?

Btw it's really not my thing to go to an anonymous forum, but I don't want to ask my co-residents/faculty because I don't want anyone in the department to think I'm unhappy or ungrateful. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
You are likely bored out of your mind doing mindless anesthetics. I would tackle the big books and start studying in depth when home and reviewing the material during the day. Ask the attending about the stuff you read. That will likely help you keep your mind busy. If it doesn't help then maybe anesthesia is not for you. I would recommend studying hard anyway, destroying the AKT and/or in training, and finishing the CA1 year even if you are looking into changing to another field. IM, Peds, Family, etc will see you as an asset if you did well in anesthesia.
 
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ResidencyBlues4me

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It's interesting as I feel exactly the same way OP. I also did a medicine intern year and my colleagues hated it while I enjoyed it myself.

I find myself missing subspecialty rotations like cards and pulm.

I went into anesthesia knowing the issues, but despite that continued on.

Now that I'm doing it day to day, I can see all the issues that people talk about and it becomes more and more depressing.

I have a sibling in primary care that says I should be happy where I am as its not as peachy over there either.

I really enjoyed CCM during my intern year which lead me talk to other family members which suggested sticking it out and doing a ccm or pain. although I find that it's going to be a very, very long 3 years.

I also find myself extremely bored with the anesthesia day to day routine although I've already seen how terrifyingly quick things can go from stable to crashing.

While I've enjoyed being in some some of the bigger cases when paired with an upper level, I've also felt the same as the poster. Unfilled, cog in the wheel and not a real doctor while all my colleagues are enjoying themselves.

I just wanted to echo the original poster as my feelings mirror yours. Although I told myself I'll give it until january than re-assess.
 

WholeLottaGame7

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Thank you all so much for your responses!
The thing is, I don't feel overwhelmed at all (unlike some of my peers) and feel like I've gotten into the rhythm of things pretty easily. While I know I obviously still have a LOT to learn, I haven't found anything to be fascinating so far. It's just so disheartening because a lot of people switch INTO anesthesia, but I don't hear too often of people switching out.

I feel like I may be missing something. My peers think the job is great (or so it seems...they probably think I think it's great too because I don't want to complain and bring others' morale down). Also the thread right above this one is entitled "anesthesia is awesome." I want to feel this way!! Please please correct me if I'm wrong but I feel like most of my work is to set up the room, get the drugs in order, get the pt to the OR, monitors on, intubate, and...rinse and repeat for the majority of cases. I feel like there's not much to it for the vast majority of my day-to-day work...

It's really a sticky situation because if I do want to switch specialties, I am a bit geographically limited due to family factors. Because of this, I would hate to come forward to my PD, try to switch without being able to, and not get my contract renewed for next year effectively leaving me jobless. If I had to stick it out I would and possibly do CC fellowship.

I've known a couple people to switch out of anesthesia, so it's not unheard of, but you are correct, more people switch into it.

The sentence I've bolded above is interesting. It's way too early in CA-1 year to be thinking like that. So either you're not taking care of sick enough patients, or you're just not getting something. I guarantee you that 2 months into your CA-1 year, you can be challenging yourself to wake patients up faster, get the tube or lines in faster, use different drug/agent combinations, etc.

If every day you show up and you have 3-4 lap choles on ASA 1s and 2s, and your anesthetic plan is fent/prop/roc, tube, iso, then I could see where you're coming from.

Personally, I couldn't stand intern year. Endless mental masturbation, followed by writing orders, then endless paperwork, then following up with nurses and lab techs for not following the orders, ugh. In anesthesia, you come up with the plan, implement the plan, and follow up on the plan. It's harder when you're supervising, but still, the feedback loop is much more compact.
 

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Anesthesia's not a perfect fit for everybody, but give it some time. You may find that as you get into sicker and more complex patients, or some of the subspecialty cases, that it becomes more fun. If you're just a few weeks into CA-1 then you've still got OB, peds, cardiac, regional, pain service, critical care.

Whatever you decide, keep doing well in anesthesia, both clinically and on the exams. It'll be easier to change into something else if you're doing well. But be careful with the comfort level ... "too comfortable" CA-1s tend to be complacent, not competent, and that's where badness comes from.
 

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To the original poster

It is a Grind... that's for sure.. Sort of like the baseball season.. everyday for six months there are 12-15 baseball games being played. INcidentally, today was the last day til the allstar break. BUt the baseball season ends in six months and there is big time recognition. Anesthesia doesnt end and there is no recognition.. BUt after a while it does get amusing the nonsensical **** that my idiot colleagues do to manipulate the daily schedule..
 
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Mman

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Thank you all so much for your responses!
The thing is, I don't feel overwhelmed at all (unlike some of my peers) and feel like I've gotten into the rhythm of things pretty easily. While I know I obviously still have a LOT to learn, I haven't found anything to be fascinating so far. It's just so disheartening because a lot of people switch INTO anesthesia, but I don't hear too often of people switching out.

I feel like I may be missing something. My peers think the job is great (or so it seems...they probably think I think it's great too because I don't want to complain and bring others' morale down). Also the thread right above this one is entitled "anesthesia is awesome." I want to feel this way!! Please please correct me if I'm wrong but I feel like most of my work is to set up the room, get the drugs in order, get the pt to the OR, monitors on, intubate, and...rinse and repeat for the majority of cases. I feel like there's not much to it for the vast majority of my day-to-day work...

It's really a sticky situation because if I do want to switch specialties, I am a bit geographically limited due to family factors. Because of this, I would hate to come forward to my PD, try to switch without being able to, and not get my contract renewed for next year effectively leaving me jobless. If I had to stick it out I would and possibly do CC fellowship.

Most programs you spend nearly all your CA1 year doing just basic general rotations. CA2 year does a lot more subspecialty rotations and many people find those more intellectually stimulating. I'd see how you feel after doing some of those rotations. It's also worth considering your perception of the specialty from the person sitting on the stool in the room. If you are to end up in academics or PP with an ACT model, as an attending you aren't the one that has to set up the room, hook up all the monitors, draw up all the drugs, etc. You spend a far higher percentage of your time coming up with an anesthetic plan, doing invasive procedures, and trouble shooting difficult situations.

But some people do switch out of anesthesia and find happiness elsewhere. Just because lots of people switch from something else to anesthesia doesn't mean you have to like it too.
 

Honeeplz3

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Thank you all! I believe my gut was telling me what you are saying...to give it a fair shot the next several months. And you're completely right in that I haven't had any complex cases, mostly chole's, hernia repairs, wound debridements, all in healthy patients so I believe this could be at least PART of the issue. Tomorrow I have a patient with heart failure and pulmonary htn so that should definitely be a challenge for me.

And yes, I felt the burn of the system on wards too, but also enjoyed getting more breaks and not feeling PHYSICALLY tired at the end of the day. (Most days my back and joints are killing me, probably from poor posture and pushing beds around).
 

anes121508

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If you stick it out, you may find that the sub specialty cases are really fun, stimulating, challenging, and rewarding...

You might be exhausted at the end of a day but I gaurantee you won't be watching the clock tick and feeling like a prisoner once they let you do cases on sick neonates, traumas, transplants, cardiac stuff, ect...

Most days I look up and can't believe it's already 3pm.

Knee scopes, endo, eye balls, lap choleys are boring (but you will learn to enjoy a mentally easier day every once in a while)....just stick it out until you get a sense of everything anesthesia has to offer
 

Mman

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And yes, I felt the burn of the system on wards too, but also enjoyed getting more breaks and not feeling PHYSICALLY tired at the end of the day. (Most days my back and joints are killing me, probably from poor posture and pushing beds around).

I found CA1 year to be the most physical tiring year of all, by a long shot. The longer you do anesthesia, the more efficient you get at doing all the mindless BS. You don't need to show up nearly as early in the morning because you can set up quicker. You are better at prepping for you next case during your current one so you can actually sit on your butt for a few minutes between each case.
 

BLADEMDA

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This generation sure has a lot of whiners/cry babies. I guess when you are used to getting an award for "participation" your entire life and told you are "special" the rude awakening of the O.R. that you are NOT any big deal is quite an eye opener. Well, get used to it because Residency isn't about feeling good or having fun (although you can do those at times) but rather honing your skills as a professional. You are learning a trade and that involves hard work much of it boring and tedious. Anesthesiology isn't glamorous although we have our moments.
We are the Linemen of the O.R. We "block and tackle" while the superstars throw touchdowns or run for 50 yards. We rarely get the glory but almost always the blame. That's why Jet recommended you keep your head down while working extra hard.

Nobody should be quitting Anesthesiology as a CA-1 as they have no idea what the specialty entails yet; but, there are those who should be asked to look at another field if they lack the motor skills and attention to detail that this specialty requires. If after 2 years as an Anesthesia resident you still can't stand the field I would still argue for you to finish The Residency even if you plan on pursuing another specialty.

I can tell you that being an Attending is better in most ways than being a Resident. If you don't like sitting cases there are thousands of jobs out there where you can supervise CRNAs or AAs and never do your own anesthetic (for the record I think this is a bad idea as a new grad).

The bottom line is the time has come to grow up and deal with the issues. This is the specialty you picked so "suck it up" and do what needs to be done. Go have some pizza and beer with your fellow classmates and blow off some steam.
 
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Honeeplz3

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This generation sure has a lot of whiners/cry babies. I guess when you are used to getting an award for "participation" your entire life and told you are "special" the rude awakening of the O.R. that you are NOT any big deal is quite an eye opener. Well, get used to it because Residency isn't about feeling good or having fun (although you can do those at times) but rather honing your skills as a professional. You are learning a trade and that involves hard work much of it boring and tedious. Anesthesiology isn't glamorous although we have our moments.
We are the Linemen of the O.R. We "block and tackle" while the superstars throw touchdowns or run for 50 yards. We rarely get the glory but almost always the blame. That's why Jet recommended you keep your head down while working extra hard.

Nobody should be quitting Anesthesiology as a CA-1 as they have no idea what the specialty entails yet; but, there are those who should be asked to look at another field if they lack the motor skills and attention to detail that this specialty requires. If after 2 years as an Anesthesia resident you still can't stand the field I would still argue for you to finish The Residency even if you plan on pursuing another specialty.

I can tell you that being an Attending is better in most ways than being a Resident. If you don't like sitting cases there are thousands of jobs out there where you can supervise CRNAs or AAs and never do your own anesthetic (for the record I think this is a bad idea as a new grad).

The bottom line is the time has come to grow up and deal with the issues. This is the specialty you picked so "suck it up" and do what needs to be done. Go have some pizza and beer with your fellow classmates and blow off some steam.

Thank you for those encouraging words. Haha.

I don't care about "awards for participation" or being a "big deal", just concerned that anesthesia isn't something I particularly enjoy. You know, kind of like when you're dating someone and at first it's great but then you start to see the faults and you know everyone has faults so you try and decide is it worth it or just not my cup of tea.
 

Honeeplz3

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If you stick it out, you may find that the sub specialty cases are really fun, stimulating, challenging, and rewarding...

You might be exhausted at the end of a day but I gaurantee you won't be watching the clock tick and feeling like a prisoner once they let you do cases on sick neonates, traumas, transplants, cardiac stuff, ect...

Most days I look up and can't believe it's already 3pm.

Knee scopes, endo, eye balls, lap choleys are boring (but you will learn to enjoy a mentally easier day every once in a while)....just stick it out until you get a sense of everything anesthesia has to offer

I have a feeling cardiac cases might interest me, but we do CT until second year. Maybe I could beg someone to let me in on a case or two to get my feet wet.
 
D

deleted171991

Thank you for those encouraging words. Haha.

I don't care about "awards for participation" or being a "big deal", just concerned that anesthesia isn't something I particularly enjoy. You know, kind of like when you're dating someone and at first it's great but then you start to see the faults and you know everyone has faults so you try and decide is it worth it or just not my cup of tea.
Dude, this is not dating time. You're married. It's your fault you didn't make sure that the sex was good, before the wedding night.
 
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Honeeplz3

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Anesthesia's not a perfect fit for everybody, but give it some time. You may find that as you get into sicker and more complex patients, or some of the subspecialty cases, that it becomes more fun. If you're just a few weeks into CA-1 then you've still got OB, peds, cardiac, regional, pain service, critical care.

Whatever you decide, keep doing well in anesthesia, both clinically and on the exams. It'll be easier to change into something else if you're doing well. But be careful with the comfort level ... "too comfortable" CA-1s tend to be complacent, not competent, and that's where badness comes from.

Yes, definitely don't want to get too comfortable. So far I have never witnessed "**** hit the fan" undoubtedly due to the level of cases I'm in/attendings watching over us at this early stage in our career. Not that I WANT my patients to be in any sort of imminent danger, but I believe witnessing this and treating it first hand could help me appreciate anesthesia more.
 

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I was a CA1 30 years ago. But I loved the procedures. That's what really got me excited to come to work every single day. The intubations, spinals, epidurals, etc. then it was central lines, learning about inhalation anesthesia. I used ether, halothane, trilene, chloroform, the EMO, Boyle bottle. Etc etc.. Doing new stuff every day is what had me coming to work early and leaving late. It got me reading about procedures.




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Honeeplz3

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Dude, this is not dating time. You're married. It's your fault you didn't make sure that the sex was good, before the wedding night.

Unfortunately I found medical school rotations impossible to truly get a feel for the day to day life of specialties. For instance during my OR rotations we were there to intubate and stick around for a bit of the case, but this was often interrupted by lectures, sim labs, etc so I didn't fully grasp the whole scope of it.
 

Honeeplz3

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You are likely bored out of your mind doing mindless anesthetics. I would tackle the big books and start studying in depth when home and reviewing the material during the day. Ask the attending about the stuff you read. That will likely help you keep your mind busy. If it doesn't help then maybe anesthesia is not for you. I would recommend studying hard anyway, destroying the AKT and/or in training, and finishing the CA1 year even if you are looking into changing to another field. IM, Peds, Family, etc will see you as an asset if you did well in anesthesia.

Thank you for that reminder. I am continuing to be the hardest working resident I possibly can because at the end of the day it is my JOB.
I also don't want to shoot myself in the foot should I decide that I was just crazy for thinking anesthesia was anything but awesome.
 

Honeeplz3

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I was a CA1 30 years ago. But I loved the procedures. That's what really got me excited to come to work every single day. The intubations, spirals, epidurals,


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What I really do enjoy the most is talking with the patients in preop and reassuring them that I will take great care of them.

I also really like starting IVs for some reason. Even more than intubating, which is weird.
 
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deleted171991

What I really do enjoy the most is talking with the patients in preop and reassuring them that I will take great care of them.

I also really like starting IVs for some reason. Even more than intubating, which is weird.
Oh, dude! You smell like medicine. Whenever you're bored, read something, and you might feel happier (just don't flaunt it). Most people go into anesthesia because they hate talking to patients and intellectual exercise; you seem to like both.

The pain or CCM advice just got better. The good news is that your patients and/or their families will love you.
 

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You might just be missing the familiarity of your intern year. I hated my CA1 year the first 6 months and for a while thought I was going to go back to internal medicine. Things do get better. If you find yourself yearning for a more medicine type of life, do critical care (I did!). I am feeling the same problem I had as a CA1. I am now doing my cardiothoracic anesthesia fellowship and really miss the ICU. It'll take time to adjust, stick it out!
 

Honeeplz3

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Oh, dude! You smell like medicine. Whenever you're bored, read something, and you might feel happier (just don't flaunt it). Most people go into anesthesia because they hate talking to patients and intellectual exercise; you seem to like both.

The pain or CCM advice just got better. The good news is that your patients and/or their families will love you.

I'm concerned I smell like medicine too! Which I why I'm contemplating if it's worth 3 years of something I don't enjoy to do a year more of fellowship, or if I'd be happy doing IM for 2 years, and probably doing outpatient medicine. I realize the money in anesthesia is much higher...
 

Honeeplz3

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You might just be missing the familiarity of your intern year. I hated my CA1 year the first 6 months and for a while thought I was going to go back to internal medicine. Things do get better. If you find yourself yearning for a more medicine type of life, do critical care (I did!). I am feeling the same problem I had as a CA1. I am now doing my cardiothoracic anesthesia fellowship and really miss the ICU. It'll take time to adjust, stick it out!

Wow! ICU and CT?! *bows down* Thanks so much for the encouragement. I'm going to give it a fair shot.
 
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deleted171991

I'm concerned I smell like medicine too! Which I why I'm contemplating if it's worth 3 years of something I don't enjoy to do a year more of fellowship, or if I'd be happy doing IM for 2 years, and probably doing outpatient medicine. I realize the money in anesthesia is much higher...
Don't worry; it will get better. There are a number of us here who have walked in your shoes, and ended up liking anesthesia. (And I still don't like the nursing part, after all these years, although it's not PC to say so. But I also love that I don't depend on nurses to do my job either, which few doctors can say. And I still hate waking up early, or having to set up stuff when working solo.)

Do pain if you like outpatient. Do CCM if you like inpatient. The great news is that you are only 10 days into your residency and you already know what to focus on. ;)
 
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bashwell

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I'm concerned I smell like medicine too! Which I why I'm contemplating if it's worth 3 years of something I don't enjoy to do a year more of fellowship, or if I'd be happy doing IM for 2 years, and probably doing outpatient medicine. I realize the money in anesthesia is much higher...
It's higher than IM, but is the money in anesthesia much higher than for eg pulm/cc or cards? Not sure? Anecdotally the money seems better in pulm/cc and cards than anesthesia if money is the goal, based on what friends in these fields have told me, but there are trade offs and maybe the money ain't worth the trade offs for you.
 
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deleted171991

Cards money is probably better. Pulm/CCM not yet. Anesthesia income is going down, CCM is going up; they will meet soon, especially when the bundled payments circus begins.
 
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bashwell

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In the past you seemed to have an interest in psychiatry, maybe pain would be interestng for you?
 

Honeeplz3

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:kiss:Thank you everyone so much for all the encouragement. I was a little unsure about going to an anonymous forum because forums can attract some pretty negative people. I was looking for some positive enouragement and I'm truly touched by all the responses from anonymous people giving guidance through their experiences. You don't have to take time out of your day to help some random person on the intenet and your words and honestly were very appreciated. It has really shaped how I'm going to approach this week and next few months.

I'm realizing too this has got to be the biggest first world problem ever. When I turn on the news and see nothing but hurt, not loving my job at this moment isn't the worst thing in the world. I'm lucky that my co-residents and faculty are so amazing because if they weren't my situation would be 1,000,000x worse.

Any more experiences/thoughts, good and bad are appreciated. :kiss:
 

Honeeplz3

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It's higher than IM, but is the money in anesthesia much higher than for eg pulm/cc or cards? Not sure? Anecdotally the money seems better in pulm/cc and cards than anesthesia if money is the goal, based on what friends in these fields have told me, but there are trade offs and maybe the money ain't worth the trade offs for you.

Actually not concerned too much with money. SO has a decent source of income and I'm more interested in a fulfilling career. I'm not even sure why I mentioned that. Haha. I think I knew someone was going to say that so I wanted to beat them to it.

I would take fulfilling, yet not life-consuming career >>>>>>> money
 
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Honeeplz3

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In the past you seemed to have an interest in psychiatry, maybe pain would be interestng for you?

Yes I did! It's so strange...how in the world could someone even consider these two specialties?? What the eff is wrong with me? Pain would definitely be a good option, but it is pretty competitive, and not sure how I feel contributing to the opioid addiction in the country.
 
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deleted171991

:kiss:Thank you everyone so much for all the encouragement. I was a little unsure about going to an anonymous forum because forums can attract some pretty negative people. I was looking for some positive enouragement and I'm truly touched by all the responses from anonymous people giving guidance through their experiences. You don't have to take time out of your day to help some random person on the intenet and your words and honestly were very appreciated. It has really shaped how I'm going to approach this week and next few months.

I'm realizing too this has got to be the biggest first world problem ever. When I turn on the news and see nothing but hurt, not loving my job at this moment isn't the worst thing in the world. I'm lucky that my co-residents and faculty are so amazing because if they weren't my situation would be 1,000,000x worse.

Any more experiences/thoughts, good and bad are appreciated. :kiss:
You must have caught us in the manic phase of our bipolar disorder.

"When the moon is in the seventh house
And Jupiter aligns with Mars
Then peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars"
 
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bashwell

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:kiss:Thank you everyone so much for all the encouragement. I was a little unsure about going to an anonymous forum because forums can attract some pretty negative people. I was looking for some positive enouragement and I'm truly touched by all the responses from anonymous people giving guidance through their experiences. You don't have to take time out of your day to help some random person on the intenet and your words and honestly were very appreciated. It has really shaped how I'm going to approach this week and next few months.

I'm realizing too this has got to be the biggest first world problem ever. When I turn on the news and see nothing but hurt, not loving my job at this moment isn't the worst thing in the world. I'm lucky that my co-residents and faculty are so amazing because if they weren't my situation would be 1,000,000x worse.

Any more experiences/thoughts, good and bad are appreciated. :kiss:
In case you haven't already seen the other thread currently on this forum, "Anesthesia is awesome" might be encouraging for you OP :)

http://forums.studentdoctor.net/threads/anesthesia-is-awesome.1210067
 
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Consigliere

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If anyone could tell me reasons they love anesthesia I would love to hear it.:p I honestly want to love it so bad. I never thought I would be in this situation.

Right now I feel like a monkey trapped in an OR who works a considerable amount of nights and weekends, which probably won't change too much even when an attending. :eek:
I'm telling you this for your own good - get out now while you can. Suck up the losses and downsides because they will only be temporary. Spending your life in a career you absolutely loathe isn't a life at all. I loved my anesthesiology residency. It wasn't until I was in practice for over 10 years that I started to become disgruntled. If you are hating life now, believe me, you will be damn near suicidal once you are an attending.
 
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Consigliere

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I'm concerned I smell like medicine too! Which I why I'm contemplating if it's worth 3 years of something I don't enjoy to do a year more of fellowship, or if I'd be happy doing IM for 2 years, and probably doing outpatient medicine. I realize the money in anesthesia is much higher...

Not that much higher and certainly not for much longer.
 
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Honeeplz3

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If every day you show up and you have 3-4 lap choles on ASA 1s and 2s, and your anesthetic plan is fent/prop/roc, tube, iso, then I could see where you're coming from.

This made me laugh because it is exactly the ONLY thing I have ever done in anesthesia..for 6 weeks straight.
 

Planktonmd

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I'm concerned I smell like medicine too! Which I why I'm contemplating if it's worth 3 years of something I don't enjoy to do a year more of fellowship, or if I'd be happy doing IM for 2 years, and probably doing outpatient medicine. I realize the money in anesthesia is much higher...
I honestly think you should be an artist or maybe a poet... did you consider traveling around the world or becoming a Buddhist monk for a couple of years before committing to a career in anesthesiology?
 
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Honeeplz3

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I honestly think you should be an artist or maybe a poet... did you consider traveling around the world or becoming a Buddhist monk for a couple of years before committing to a career in anesthesiology?

Hmmm...now that you mention it...

only orange is not my color. Damn. For a second there I thought I had it all figured out
 

Twiggidy

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This generation sure has a lot of whiners/cry babies. I guess when you are used to getting an award for "participation" your entire life and told you are "special" the rude awakening of the O.R. that you are NOT any big deal is quite an eye opener. Well, get used to it because Residency isn't about feeling good or having fun (although you can do those at times) but rather honing your skills as a professional. You are learning a trade and that involves hard work much of it boring and tedious. Anesthesiology isn't glamorous although we have our moments.
We are the Linemen of the O.R. We "block and tackle" while the superstars throw touchdowns or run for 50 yards. We rarely get the glory but almost always the blame. That's why Jet recommended you keep your head down while working extra hard.

Nobody should be quitting Anesthesiology as a CA-1 as they have no idea what the specialty entails yet; but, there are those who should be asked to look at another field if they lack the motor skills and attention to detail that this specialty requires. If after 2 years as an Anesthesia resident you still can't stand the field I would still argue for you to finish The Residency even if you plan on pursuing another specialty.

I can tell you that being an Attending is better in most ways than being a Resident. If you don't like sitting cases there are thousands of jobs out there where you can supervise CRNAs or AAs and never do your own anesthetic (for the record I think this is a bad idea as a new grad).

The bottom line is the time has come to grow up and deal with the issues. This is the specialty you picked so "suck it up" and do what needs to be done. Go have some pizza and beer with your fellow classmates and blow off some steam.

This is the most real-est talk to ever be real talked ever on this board. May not always agree with your politics @BLADEMDA but you sure bring it
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