- Joined
- Oct 12, 2004
- Messages
- 35
- Reaction score
- 0
hey guys,
i know you all must be busy but does anyone want to read my ps?
thanks
i know you all must be busy but does anyone want to read my ps?
thanks
Anyone want to read a Personal Statement?
- Thread starter deacon
- Start date
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2004
- Messages
- 35
- Reaction score
- 0
okay...here it is
I could barely discern sounds of feet shuffling around noisily over squeaky wheels rolling around back and forth. Suddenly, the sound of a loud, pulsating beat pierced the air. Groggily, I reached over attempting to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock repeatedly with no success. Feelings of annoyance soon crept in after numerous failed attempts, when suddenly a nurse walked in, fiddled around with some buttons and hastily left the room. By that time, I had managed to completely pry open my eyes and much to my disappointment, I was back in the same drab room at Mount Sinai Hospital yet again.
Being a patient was not uncommon for me as I had suffered from chronic pancreatitis for a year and a half. However, unlike past hospitalizations lasting typically only days, I had now been waking up in that same room for the past three weeks. Despite having undergone numerous endoscopies, ultrasounds and CT scans, my specialist was unable to elucidate a cause for the illness and as a result, could not prescribe me a permanent treatment aside from pain management. However, my stay at the hospital this time would become a major turning point in my life. During my latest CT scan, my doctor spotted a pseudocyst blocking the pancreatic duct and was finally able to suggest removal of part of my pancreas. I was scheduled for surgery three days later, which in the end the surgery was a complete success to this day: I have never had another episode or have had any other problems with my pancreas.
There are certain rare, defining moments that one experiences which are capable of altering the course of an individuals life. How an individual deals with difficulties and challenges provides invaluable insight into their own character and identity. I am defined by my battle with pancreatitis, having endured much emotional and physical pain and suffering in the process. It has altered every facet of my life and has helped shape me into the person that I am today. Battling this illness has provided me with the strength, perseverance and determination to get through any challenges that I will encounter in life.
The hospital exposed me to an abundance of other patients who were not only in a poorer state of health than me, but who came from more difficult socio-economic backgrounds. Meeting these people made me realize that I wanted to be able to help and support less fortunate individuals just as others had done for me in my time of difficulty. I was determined to turn this negative period in my life into something positive by committing myself to giving back to the community. One activity in particular has proved to be an invaluable learning experience; my role as a leader for a volunteer placement at Xavier Public School. The public school was situated in a less affluent area where many children came from foster homes or dysfunctional families plagued with drug and alcohol abuse. Every week, I would facilitate the group discussion about our interactions with the children and often, issues involving suspected child abuse and negligence would arise. From this, I was able to learn the importance of fostering a good group atmosphere-one that promoted communication, respect for each others ideas, trust and co-operation.
These are all qualities that I found to be valuable in a clinical setting by being a volunteer in the Pediatrics ward at Mt. Sinai. Volunteering in the hospital provides me the very special and important opportunity to spend time with children who are afflicted with different illnesses in the same hospital where I underwent treatment. Having dealt with a chronic illness in the past, I am able to relate to these children with compassion, sensitivity and patience on a deeper level. Every week I spend consoling a crying baby hooked up to numerous IVs and tubes continually reaffirms my motivation and passion in wanting to make a difference in the lives of others.
Throughout all my work and volunteer experiences, I have been exposed to a multitude of individuals from diverse backgrounds-all of whom have altered my perspective on life and have taught me the importance of helping others who are suffering in less fortunate situations than my own. What appeals me about medicine is exactly this, having the capacity and knowledge to be able to heal and alleviate the sufferings of others. Being a physician enables me to not only make a difference in the community by helping others, but is a career that is socially and mentally stimulating, challenging and personally rewarding. By being immersed in a hospital atmosphere, I was able to see how important the qualities of empathy, effective communication skills, motivation, leadership and patience are for a physician. I believe that my experiences as a patient in the hospital as well as my volunteer and extra-curricular activities have enabled me to attain these qualities necessary for medicine. Most of all, I feel that medicine offers one of the most special gifts that one can give to another person: the ability to restore the health and livelihood of other individuals and to help them reclaim their right to live life to their maximum capacity. The immense impact the actions and behaviour of my doctor has had on my own life has motivated me to enact this same kind of positive, direct impact on the lives of other individuals.
I could barely discern sounds of feet shuffling around noisily over squeaky wheels rolling around back and forth. Suddenly, the sound of a loud, pulsating beat pierced the air. Groggily, I reached over attempting to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock repeatedly with no success. Feelings of annoyance soon crept in after numerous failed attempts, when suddenly a nurse walked in, fiddled around with some buttons and hastily left the room. By that time, I had managed to completely pry open my eyes and much to my disappointment, I was back in the same drab room at Mount Sinai Hospital yet again.
Being a patient was not uncommon for me as I had suffered from chronic pancreatitis for a year and a half. However, unlike past hospitalizations lasting typically only days, I had now been waking up in that same room for the past three weeks. Despite having undergone numerous endoscopies, ultrasounds and CT scans, my specialist was unable to elucidate a cause for the illness and as a result, could not prescribe me a permanent treatment aside from pain management. However, my stay at the hospital this time would become a major turning point in my life. During my latest CT scan, my doctor spotted a pseudocyst blocking the pancreatic duct and was finally able to suggest removal of part of my pancreas. I was scheduled for surgery three days later, which in the end the surgery was a complete success to this day: I have never had another episode or have had any other problems with my pancreas.
There are certain rare, defining moments that one experiences which are capable of altering the course of an individuals life. How an individual deals with difficulties and challenges provides invaluable insight into their own character and identity. I am defined by my battle with pancreatitis, having endured much emotional and physical pain and suffering in the process. It has altered every facet of my life and has helped shape me into the person that I am today. Battling this illness has provided me with the strength, perseverance and determination to get through any challenges that I will encounter in life.
The hospital exposed me to an abundance of other patients who were not only in a poorer state of health than me, but who came from more difficult socio-economic backgrounds. Meeting these people made me realize that I wanted to be able to help and support less fortunate individuals just as others had done for me in my time of difficulty. I was determined to turn this negative period in my life into something positive by committing myself to giving back to the community. One activity in particular has proved to be an invaluable learning experience; my role as a leader for a volunteer placement at Xavier Public School. The public school was situated in a less affluent area where many children came from foster homes or dysfunctional families plagued with drug and alcohol abuse. Every week, I would facilitate the group discussion about our interactions with the children and often, issues involving suspected child abuse and negligence would arise. From this, I was able to learn the importance of fostering a good group atmosphere-one that promoted communication, respect for each others ideas, trust and co-operation.
These are all qualities that I found to be valuable in a clinical setting by being a volunteer in the Pediatrics ward at Mt. Sinai. Volunteering in the hospital provides me the very special and important opportunity to spend time with children who are afflicted with different illnesses in the same hospital where I underwent treatment. Having dealt with a chronic illness in the past, I am able to relate to these children with compassion, sensitivity and patience on a deeper level. Every week I spend consoling a crying baby hooked up to numerous IVs and tubes continually reaffirms my motivation and passion in wanting to make a difference in the lives of others.
Throughout all my work and volunteer experiences, I have been exposed to a multitude of individuals from diverse backgrounds-all of whom have altered my perspective on life and have taught me the importance of helping others who are suffering in less fortunate situations than my own. What appeals me about medicine is exactly this, having the capacity and knowledge to be able to heal and alleviate the sufferings of others. Being a physician enables me to not only make a difference in the community by helping others, but is a career that is socially and mentally stimulating, challenging and personally rewarding. By being immersed in a hospital atmosphere, I was able to see how important the qualities of empathy, effective communication skills, motivation, leadership and patience are for a physician. I believe that my experiences as a patient in the hospital as well as my volunteer and extra-curricular activities have enabled me to attain these qualities necessary for medicine. Most of all, I feel that medicine offers one of the most special gifts that one can give to another person: the ability to restore the health and livelihood of other individuals and to help them reclaim their right to live life to their maximum capacity. The immense impact the actions and behaviour of my doctor has had on my own life has motivated me to enact this same kind of positive, direct impact on the lives of other individuals.
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2005
- Messages
- 269
- Reaction score
- 0
it's pretty good,
i feel like its kinda cookie cutter'ish. Some of the sentences you use are cliche. ANd i felt like some of the links you made were a little bit of a stretch.
Remember to link your experiences to specific aspects of why you want to go into medicine. I guess the "I talked to people from different socioeconmic backgrounds and this mademerealize i wanted to help less privileged people" didn't strikeme as a strong link because it was so vague.
If you can make th elinks stronger and more specific (because everyone tries to convey the same ideas ie diversity, wanting to helppeople)
but its a matter of how well you show you have TESTEd yourself
Overall i think it was very good, and definately could submit it now, but i also think it could be better.
i feel like its kinda cookie cutter'ish. Some of the sentences you use are cliche. ANd i felt like some of the links you made were a little bit of a stretch.
Remember to link your experiences to specific aspects of why you want to go into medicine. I guess the "I talked to people from different socioeconmic backgrounds and this mademerealize i wanted to help less privileged people" didn't strikeme as a strong link because it was so vague.
If you can make th elinks stronger and more specific (because everyone tries to convey the same ideas ie diversity, wanting to helppeople)
but its a matter of how well you show you have TESTEd yourself
Overall i think it was very good, and definately could submit it now, but i also think it could be better.
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2005
- Messages
- 565
- Reaction score
- 1
personally i'm sick of the "catchy opening." it sounds like people are trying too hard. your first 3 paragraphs can be distilled. adcoms want to know what you did with your motivation. not necessarily half an essay about why you have the motivation.
