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applying california medical schools OOS b/c I'm engaged

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redpillchick

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I'm getting married to this guy from California in 8 months and I'm a NY resident. I've already applied to a bunch of NY schools and before we were talking about him living with me here in NY but I really would rather move to Cali so he can keep his job.

Honestly, is this feasible? I'm applying this cycle and I don't care if I go to DO or MD school. I just want to be near him in Sacramento. I know CNUCOM exists but I've heard some bad things???

I really need to be in California for this to work and I was wondering if I should just call things off :( Does anyone have insight on what to do? I feel like long distance isn't going to work and I don't want to sacrifice this engagement for med school :(
 
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I'm getting married to this guy from California in 8 months and I'm a NY resident. I've already applied to a bunch of NY schools and before we were talking about him living with me here in NY but I really would rather move to Cali so he can keep his job.

Honestly, is this feasible? I'm applying this cycle and I don't care if I go to DO or MD school. I just want to be near him in Sacramento. I know CNUCOM exists but I've heard some bad things???

I really need to be in California for this to work and I was wondering if I should just call things off :( Does anyone have insight on what to do? I feel like long distance isn't going to work and I don't want to sacrifice this engagement for med school :(
Are you a top notch candidate who would appeal to highly selective schools? Why not post further information about yourself so @gyngyn can give a better opinion on this strategy being used at California schools?
 

Crayola227

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for the sweet love of Jesus ****ing Christ and all his saints -

do NOT give up this career aspiration for an engagement for a dude's job

NOOOO
NOOOO
NOOOO

I won't explain exactly how going down that path ruins lives, but take it from someone whose life was *almost* ruined by such a scenario, but now has the FOREVER title of "Doctor" over a Mrs. and a last name you can't wait to lose. One is really is forever. The other one can't live up to that promise no matter how many vows you take.

I used to believe in love over career. Luckily the person I was with at the time didn't. So I went with career and now he's out of the picture, not because of career. Best life choice I ever made, and my life has been one **** show after another.

Woman after woman will tell you this, but it never "feels right." It's a decision you have to make with foresight, that won't feel right until it's hindsight.

you will either take my advice and in 10-20 years be SOOOO glad
or you won't, and you'll end up at *some* point regretting it the rest of your life

*caveat: medicine is a calling to you, almost on the level of the spiritual. you *love* it. Because I can't promise you won't regret choosing medicine. I can almost guarantee you'll regret losing it for a guy though.
 
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CyrilFiggis

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you will either take my advice and in 10-20 years be SOOOO glad
or you won't, and you'll end up at *some* point regretting it the rest of your life

*caveat: medicine is a calling to you, almost on the level of the spiritual. you *love* it. Because I can't promise you won't regret choosing medicine. I can almost guarantee you'll regret losing it for a guy though.
@redpillchick The above opinion does not reflect the opinions/outcome of all doctors. There are plenty of doctors who in that same 10-20 year timeframe burn out of being a physician.

You just need to have an honest discussion with your partner about what this decision means. You will both have to sacrifice in the relationship regardless of if you were going into medicine or not. The key to success is an open dialogue. Many med schools now offer programs and contacts for med school spouses to help them with readjustment and job placement. Also, besides NY and CA, have you discussed the other schools you're applying to? I had the discussion with my spouse about it before I applied. I gave her a list of 50 schools and the cities they were in and said "where can you find career worthy work" she culled it down to around 34 programs and that's where I applied. To end the story, we lived in Los Angeles and I was accepted to a program in Boston. I'm 4 weeks away from starting, but my wife and I have been here since April because she knew ahead of time where to be looking and found a killer job.
 
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redpillchick

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nah he has to be in sacramento and i dont want him to move for me because i respect his decision to stay and be with his family. i mean i know being a doctor is nice and im not doing it for the prestige but i also wanna have kids and a life which i really don't think i can do with med school going on. thinking about going into dental school (and yes ive shadowed a dentist, and am interested in dental school) even.

@Crayola227 i really dont wanna give up my career but I mean I love him and I want a family with him so I might take a few yrs off, live where he lives, and then go to med school. my family and my guy are really important to me.

@gyngyn so here's my story. my scores aren't perfect...

I did poorly in most of my intro bio/chem/phys classes (like C+/B-) but had an upward trend.

In my first semester of junior year, I took orgo 1 and got an F and got an incomplete in this biology class because of health issues but second semester, took 17 credits of upper level bio and got a 3.6 and then got 4.0 for the last two semesters with lots of help and tutoring.

Currently, my sGPA is a 3.37 and my cGPA is a 3.47 but if I my retrograde withdrawal is approved for the first semester of junior yr, my sGPA would be a 3.47 and cGPA around a 3.57.

I have a 515 on my MCAT. Volunteered at a maternity center for 3 years (200 hrs), helped kids read for 100 hrs, shadowed for about 100 hours, and did research at a children's hospital for a year and then did research at my college for a year which got me a poster. As for ECs, I'm VP of my pre-health fraternity and I'm an epee fencer.
 

Goro

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I strongly suggest Touro-CA and avoid CN"U" like you would Zika virus.


nah he has to be in sacramento and i dont want him to move for me because i respect his decision to stay and be with his family. i mean i know being a doctor is nice and im not doing it for the prestige but i also wanna have kids and a life which i really don't think i can do with med school going on. thinking about going into dental school (and yes ive shadowed a dentist, and am interested in dental school) even.

@Crayola227 i really dont wanna give up my career but I mean I love him and I want a family with him so I might take a few yrs off, live where he lives, and then go to med school. my family and my guy are really important to me.

@gyngyn so here's my story. my scores aren't perfect...

I did poorly in most of my intro bio/chem/phys classes (like C+/B-) but had an upward trend.

In my first semester of junior year, I took orgo 1 and got an F and got an incomplete in this biology class because of health issues but second semester, took 17 credits of upper level bio and got a 3.6 and then got 4.0 for the last two semesters with lots of help and tutoring.

Currently, my sGPA is a 3.37 and my cGPA is a 3.47 but if I my retrograde withdrawal is approved for the first semester of junior yr, my sGPA would be a 3.47 and cGPA around a 3.57.

I have a 515 on my MCAT. Volunteered at a maternity center for 3 years (200 hrs), helped kids read for 100 hrs, shadowed for about 100 hours, and did research at a children's hospital for a year and then did research at my college for a year which got me a poster. As for ECs, I'm VP of my pre-health fraternity and I'm an epee fencer.
 
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redpillchick

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@Goro how bad is CNU, it's literally 20 minutes from my fiance and i thought about it :( i thought it was accredited? but thanks for the info.
 
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Correct me if I'm wrong but you are willingly limiting yourself to marry someone who lives on the complete opposite side of the country? What could possibly go wrong?
 
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gyngyn

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    Last year we had 6,52o CA applicants. Only 910 of them were seated IS. If that is your only MCAT, it is above the mean for CA, which would correspond to about 513+. Your gpa is well below our 3.66 mean. In order to get one of the seats that went to an OOS applicant, one would generally have to meet the mission for a mission based school (Loma Linda, Drew), have something very desirable that we don't have in abundance or have no regard for their financial welfare and no other choices (CN"U").

    UCD is modestly mission based and usually takes no one from OOS. The odd acceptance that may appear to be OOS has attended high school in CA.

    You are a very good candidate for Touro or Western. CA is a big state. It would take longer to get to Western by AMTRAK from Sacto, than flying to NY.
     
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    candbgirl

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    nah he has to be in sacramento and i dont want him to move for me because i respect his decision to stay and be with his family. i mean i know being a doctor is nice and im not doing it for the prestige but i also wanna have kids and a life which i really don't think i can do with med school going on. thinking about going into dental school (and yes ive shadowed a dentist, and am interested in .

    So you don't even care much if you are a doctor or even a dentist at this point. Why did you apply anywhere? Withdraw your applications, spend the next 8 months planning your wedding and have a happy life. If at some point you decide to pursue medicine or something else go do it then. Happiness is important in life.


    Sent from my iPad using SDN mobile app
     
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    DokterMom

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    I'm getting married to this guy from California in 8 months and I'm a NY resident. I've already applied to a bunch of NY schools and before we were talking about him living with me here in NY but I really would rather move to Cali so he can keep his job.

    Honestly, is this feasible? I'm applying this cycle and I don't care if I go to DO or MD school. I just want to be near him in Sacramento. I know CNUCOM exists but I've heard some bad things???

    I really need to be in California for this to work and I was wondering if I should just call things off :( Does anyone have insight on what to do? I feel like long distance isn't going to work and I don't want to sacrifice this engagement for med school :(

    If marrying Mr 'don't want to leave my family' in Sacramento is more important to you than attending an inconvenient medical school, then listen to that voice and do something else: RN, PA, Midwife, dentist, whatever. It sounds like your commitment to becoming 'Mrs Him' is stronger than your commitment to medicine and a career of your own. To each, her own.

    for the sweet love of Jesus ****ing Christ and all his saints -

    do NOT give up this career aspiration for an engagement for a dude's job

    NOOOO
    NOOOO
    NOOOO

    I won't explain exactly how going down that path ruins lives, but take it from someone whose life was *almost* ruined by such a scenario, but now has the FOREVER title of "Doctor" over a Mrs. and a last name you can't wait to lose. One is really is forever. The other one can't live up to that promise no matter how many vows you take.

    @Crayola227 If I could like this post more than once, I would. A dude that puts 'be close to my family in Sacramento' above 'my future wife's dream to become a physician' and a woman who agrees with him -- well, not my beverage of choice. Like you, I invested in my career and future first, then reaped the rewards from the driver's seat of a fabulous life. But there are those who prefer the passenger seat...
     
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    JustaDO

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    You mentioned that your grades aren't the greatest, and wondered if you can get into low tier medical schools in a previous post.

    I fully expect a post in the non-traditional forum ~5 years from now lamenting the difficulties of being older, and applying to medical school in a state with some of the most competitive medical schools in the country.
     
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    redpillchick

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    Correct me if I'm wrong but you are willingly limiting yourself to marry someone who lives on the complete opposite side of the country? What could possibly go wrong?

    nah but i might end the engagement if my long distance doesnt work - quite the opposite :(
     

    redpillchick

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    Last year we had 6,52o CA applicants. Only 910 of them were seated IS. If that is your only MCAT, it is above the mean for CA, which would correspond to about 513+. Your gpa is well below our 3.66 mean. In order to get one of the seats that went to an OOS applicant, one would generally have to meet the mission for a mission based school (Loma Linda, Drew), have something very desirable that we don't have in abundance or have no regard for their financial welfare and no other choices (CN"U").

    UCD is modestly mission based and usually takes no one from OOS. The odd acceptance that may appear to be OOS has attended high school in CA.

    You are a very good candidate for Touro or Western. CA is a big state. It would take longer to get to Western by AMTRAK from Sacto, than flying to NY.

    im doing americorps and i was wondering if i could mention on my apps that i will be moving to california permanently to be with my spouse, live there, become a doctor there, etc.
     

    redpillchick

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    You mentioned that your grades aren't the greatest, and wondered if you can get into low tier medical schools in a previous post.

    I fully expect a post in the non-traditional forum ~5 years from now lamenting the difficulties of being older, and applying to medical school in a state with some of the most competitive medical schools in the country.

    why are you so extra? lol.
     

    redpillchick

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    If marrying Mr 'don't want to leave my family' in Sacramento is more important to you than attending an inconvenient medical school, then listen to that voice and do something else: RN, PA, Midwife, dentist, whatever. It sounds like your commitment to becoming 'Mrs Him' is stronger than your commitment to medicine and a career of your own. To each, her own.



    @Crayola227 If I could like this post more than once, I would. A dude that puts 'be close to my family in Sacramento' above 'my future wife's dream to become a physician' and a woman who agrees with him -- well, not my beverage of choice. Like you, I invested in my career and future first, then reaped the rewards from the driver's seat of a fabulous life. But there are those who prefer the passenger seat...

    point taken but my family and God comes first. ive made enough sacrifices and I don't want to be single and unmarried till im 30+ bc i chose my career over a guy. im still trying to balance it all bc both things matter to me.
     

    redpillchick

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    Last year we had 6,52o CA applicants. Only 910 of them were seated IS. If that is your only MCAT, it is above the mean for CA, which would correspond to about 513+. Your gpa is well below our 3.66 mean. In order to get one of the seats that went to an OOS applicant, one would generally have to meet the mission for a mission based school (Loma Linda, Drew), have something very desirable that we don't have in abundance or have no regard for their financial welfare and no other choices (CN"U").

    UCD is modestly mission based and usually takes no one from OOS. The odd acceptance that may appear to be OOS has attended high school in CA.

    You are a very good candidate for Touro or Western. CA is a big state. It would take longer to get to Western by AMTRAK from Sacto, than flying to NY.

    thanks for your input - I have a question. I know Drew is historically black so do they accept students who aren't. I'm not a URM.
     

    sharkbyte

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    To answer your question about CNU, many people who constantly bash CNU don't really actually know much (or anything) about how the school operates; they just see the "new" and "for-profit" tag lines and think that it's the worst med school ever.

    One of my best friends is there right now and he's talked to me extensively about the school and it appears that things are going smoothly. Obviously with this past year being their first year there were some kinks to sort out but it appears as if the curriculum and exams and overall structure are fine and that the small issues (like hit and miss faculty) are there at every single school.
     
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    redpillchick

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    To answer your question about CNU, many people who constantly bash CNU don't really actually know much (or anything) about how the school operates; they just see the "new" and "for-profit" tag lines and think that it's the worst med school ever.

    One of my best friends is there right now and he's talked to me extensively about the school and it appears that things are going smoothly. Obviously with this past year being their first year there were some kinks to sort out but it appears as if the curriculum and exams and overall structure are fine and that the small issues (like hit and miss faculty) are there at every single school.

    yeah ill think about it - seems to have very mixed reviews but thank u for your input.
     

    gyngyn

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    To answer your question about CNU, many people who constantly bash CNU don't really actually know much (or anything) about how the school operates; they just see the "new" and "for-profit" tag lines and think that it's the worst med school ever.
    CN"U" has earned its reputation by denying basic economic options to its students; opportunities like federal loans and payback mechanisms that even sleazy Caribbean schools offer.
     
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    gyngyn

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    im doing americorps and i was wondering if i could mention on my apps that i will be moving to california permanently to be with my spouse, live there, become a doctor there, etc.
    We believe that everyone wants to relocate here. Explanations are not needed.
     
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    Goro

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    A school that puts a PhD candidate in Anatomy on its website as a faculty member raises questions. Lots of questions. There is much more to our objections to CMU than mere for-profit status. I will recommend RVU and BCOM at times.

    CN"U" has earned its reputation by denying basic economic options to its students. Opportunities like federal loans and payback mechanisms that even sleazy Caribbean schools offer.
     
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    tessellations

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    If family and God come first, might I suggest Loma Linda? You may fit their mission. Check it out. I'd stay away from CNU if I were you.

    Clearly, you've made up your mind about your priorities. You've set yourself up to be in a position that will make it more difficult to get into a medical school - that's simply the reality of it. I'd keep your options open in terms of other medically related careers, such as becoming a nurse, PA, or maybe a dentist. Hell, if having children and a family are more important to you than a career in medicine, these other careers may be better for you lifestyle wise.
     
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    redpillchick

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    yeah im thinking about PA school or dental school but idk if the passion is there. the lifestyle of a doctor is not too great for the next 10 yrs so i gotta figure out what will make me happy. shadowing a dentist and a PA in a week so we'll see.

    cnucom seems shady - point taken.
     

    redpillchick

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    im taking a gap yr - thinking about establishing myself as a resident as well as maybe become a medical assistant in the next possible yr and getting some clinical experience.

    would becoming a resident in the state of california improve my chances?
     

    gyngyn

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    im taking a gap yr - thinking about establishing myself as a resident as well as maybe become a medical assistant in the next possible yr and getting some clinical experience.

    would becoming a resident in the state of california improve my chances?
    We export more pre-meds than any other state (1,528 last year). Only UCD and UCR have any preference for IS candidates. UCR is focused on the IE and UCD fills a third of the class with their own undergrad.
     
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    redpillchick

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    thanks for the info....we'll wait and see what happens.
     

    <L>

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    point taken but my family and God comes first. ive made enough sacrifices and I don't want to be single and unmarried till im 30+ bc i chose my career over a guy. im still trying to balance it all bc both things matter to me.

    Would you rather have that or the divorces I'm seeing nowdays from people in my med school class now that they've been through the grind of med school and residency?
     
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    mouster

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    I've been in this situation. It sucks all the way around. You don't want to lose your partner to long-distance, but at the same time you want to pursue your own dreams. I also did what @Crayola227 did, and I haven't regretted it. I realized that being somebody's wife (particularly his) was far less important to me than chasing my own dreams, as I didn't want to spend my entire life regretting a decision I made when I was 22. I moved across the country, went to grad school, and now I'm applying to medical school (coincidentally, I met an awesome dude along the way and now we're married).

    Ultimately, sit down, and really think about what YOU want--not what he wants, not what his/your family wants, what YOU want. If you don't get in and move to CA to be with him, are you going to spend all of your time wondering "well what if I had gone to medical school?" Are you going to be bitter about it? If you can answer those questions with resoundingly negative answers, then sure, I'd say delay your app, bolster it a bit with grade repair and ECs (because as everyone else has noted, CA med school admissions are a shark tank), and spend some time figuring out what you want--is it med school? Is it dental school? Is it neither? If you love the guy and want to be with him until you're old and wrinkly, then you can move there and figure it out afterwards (provided he has a good job to support both of you in CA...that's also an important factor).

    If you're at all unsure of your answers to those last two questions, I'd say don't marry him or at least delay the wedding. It seems harsh and I'm sure that you love him, but it comes down to the problem of having someone in your corner while you slog uphill through med school. Med school isn't a cakewalk from my understanding, and having a supportive partner will help you LOADS. My former partner was super unsupportive of my dream to go to medical school (he even asked me how I was going to manage our household AND be a doctor...because clearly both of those things were entirely my responsibility because I possessed the two X chromosomes :mad:), and I must say, comparing the times I took the MCAT with him as my partner versus my husband as my partner are starkly different. Now-husband understood that I needed to study, never guilted me about having to study even at inconvenient times, and even made dinner for me when I was particularly bogged down in content review. If you want to go to med school, find a guy like that, not some dude who insists that he "can't leave CA" for your career.
     
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    DokterMom

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    @mouster :clap::bow:
    So very, very true. The difference between a man who expects that you are there to support him and one who expects you both are there to support each other is night and day.

    Would you rather have that or the divorces I'm seeing nowdays from people in my med school class now that they've been through the grind of med school and residency?

    I've been divorced, and honestly, it ain't pretty. But that pain lasts about two years, tops. The pain of foregoing your life's dreams lasts much, much longer.

    Life is long. There's plenty of time to go to school, build a career, meet a guy, get married, and have children -- in that order even if you insist.
     
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    redpillchick

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    I've been in this situation. It sucks all the way around. You don't want to lose your partner to long-distance, but at the same time you want to pursue your own dreams. I also did what @Crayola227 did, and I haven't regretted it. I realized that being somebody's wife (particularly his) was far less important to me than chasing my own dreams, as I didn't want to spend my entire life regretting a decision I made when I was 22. I moved across the country, went to grad school, and now I'm applying to medical school (coincidentally, I met an awesome dude along the way and now we're married).

    Ultimately, sit down, and really think about what YOU want--not what he wants, not what his/your family wants, what YOU want. If you don't get in and move to CA to be with him, are you going to spend all of your time wondering "well what if I had gone to medical school?" Are you going to be bitter about it? If you can answer those questions with resoundingly negative answers, then sure, I'd say delay your app, bolster it a bit with grade repair and ECs (because as everyone else has noted, CA med school admissions are a shark tank), and spend some time figuring out what you want--is it med school? Is it dental school? Is it neither? If you love the guy and want to be with him until you're old and wrinkly, then you can move there and figure it out afterwards (provided he has a good job to support both of you in CA...that's also an important factor).

    If you're at all unsure of your answers to those last two questions, I'd say don't marry him or at least delay the wedding. It seems harsh and I'm sure that you love him, but it comes down to the problem of having someone in your corner while you slog uphill through med school. Med school isn't a cakewalk from my understanding, and having a supportive partner will help you LOADS. My former partner was super unsupportive of my dream to go to medical school (he even asked me how I was going to manage our household AND be a doctor...because clearly both of those things were entirely my responsibility because I possessed the two X chromosomes :mad:), and I must say, comparing the times I took the MCAT with him as my partner versus my husband as my partner are starkly different. Now-husband understood that I needed to study, never guilted me about having to study even at inconvenient times, and even made dinner for me when I was particularly bogged down in content review. If you want to go to med school, find a guy like that, not some dude who insists that he "can't leave CA" for your career.

    thanks for this awesome response - you seem sweet :) glad it worked out for you.

    he's willing to do long distance if i stay in NY and get into DO/MD school here I just don't wanna be here b/c I don't wanna be with him. He's pretty supportive and awesome like that. That being said, I don't think it's fair to drag him through hell and back and be away from him for 4 yrs or even more :( so I mean if it comes down to it, I might end it but I'm trying to find med schools in his area and hoping it works out.

    i'd only move in with him after I get accepted of course. He's doing well financially and if I move there we're going to buy a home :) Otherwise, if I don't get in I might break it off -_- Also, thinking it might be better if I become a PA or a dentist since I'd like more flexibility and I've shadowed dentists but in the midst of shadowing more to see if it'd be good fit.

    I don't really believe in divorce. My fam is super traditional - nobody really gets divorced. You're either married or not.
     

    redpillchick

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    eh life is about compromise....i worked too hard to get this far - i doubt i'll have to give it all up for a person.
     

    Crayola227

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    I've been divorced, and honestly, it ain't pretty. But that pain lasts about two years, tops. The pain of foregoing your life's dreams lasts much, much longer.

    good point. thanks for sharing DokMom, makes me feel better for how long it's taken me to heal

    I wasn't actually married, but close
     
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    CyrilFiggis

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    So this thread has taken on what I perceive to be a bit of a negative (or maybe forceful is the right word?) view of marriage vs. career. Or it may just be that I'm the sole male perspective on the matter and I'm being defensive..... Regardless, I don't disagree with points @DokterMom or @Crayola227 have made, but I think again it just need to be reiterated that each of us have our priorities when it comes to family and career objectives.

    Many of us that are in our 30-40s have either direct or anecdotal experiences with negative aspects of putting love/spouse before career. But the reason we all know and hear these stories is because it's the more interesting story and the one that evokes the most emotion. One of the researchers in my lab was hem/onc fellow who applied exclusively in Texas because of her husband. She had her first kid end of second year. But told her husband that when it came to residency, she was going to apply to the programs she wanted to because she had made that initial sacrifice for him. No one shares stories like that because there's nothing special about it. It's just a family doing what is necessary for their lives at that time.

    But the main take away from all of this, and I don't mean this as some sort of ultimatum, is that eventually you have to make a decision and you must stand firmly beside and hold only yourself accountable. Whatever the outcome, YOU and only you are accountable. Don't look back 15 years and resent your husband if you decided to put him first and forego medicine and don't look back 15 years and see him on Facebook happily married to Susie Derkins and say that should have been me because you put your career first.
     
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    DokterMom

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    Very well said @CyrilFiggis !


    Edit: I should clarify. I don't mean to be negative toward women who are not career-oriented. That is, as Cyril has so deftly noted, a decision each woman has to make for herself.

    But a career as a physician is one that will demand a lot of sacrifices for many years. It's not the kind of career that takes kindly to a second- or even third-place ranking in one's priority system. It needs to come first, at least for the 7-10 years needed to get fully trained.

    Other medical careers are much more flexible and amenable to a second-place position, and since her personal priorities are what they are, those other options sound like a better fit for the OP.
     
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    <L>

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    I've been divorced, and honestly, it ain't pretty. But that pain lasts about two years, tops. The pain of foregoing your life's dreams lasts much, much longer.

    Life is long. There's plenty of time to go to school, build a career, meet a guy, get married, and have children -- in that order even if you insist.

    that's what I'm getting at. There isn't any rush to do things right away unless you've got certain cultural reasons to do so. No divorce here, but my relationship at the time crashed and burned really really really badly during med school. The fact that my partner was also in the awful first professional jobs out of college phase didn't help.
     
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    redpillchick

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    Very well said @CyrilFiggis !

    Thank u for your honesty
    Edit: I should clarify. I don't mean to be negative toward women who are not career-oriented. That is, as Cyril has so deftly noted, a decision each woman has to make for herself.

    But a career as a physician is one that will demand a lot of sacrifices for many years. It's not the kind of career that takes kindly to a second- or even third-place ranking in one's priority system. It needs to come first, at least for the 7-10 years needed to get fully trained.

    Other medical careers are much more flexible and amenable to a second-place position, and since her personal priorities are what they are, those other options sound like a better fit for the OP.

    Thank u for your honesty
     

    redpillchick

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    that's what I'm getting at. There isn't any rush to do things right away unless you've got certain cultural reasons to do so. No divorce here, but my relationship at the time crashed and burned really really really badly during med school. The fact that my partner was also in the awful first professional jobs out of college phase didn't help.

    Yeah culturally in my fam women get married at 21 so im not giving that up might take time off to start a family or build my relationship before med school
     

    redpillchick

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    that's what I'm getting at. There isn't any rush to do things right away unless you've got certain cultural reasons to do so. No divorce here, but my relationship at the time crashed and burned really really really badly during med school. The fact that my partner was also in the awful first professional jobs out of college phase didn't help.

    He's settled down and im a bit younger so i think it'd be fine in my case but yeah its not gonna be easy
     

    JustaDO

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    I have to admit, this has been pretty elaborate, 10/10

    upload_2016-7-12_20-7-18.png


    https://redpillchick.wordpress.com/

    Bravo, simply bravo. Streampaw strikes again I see.
     
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    darkjedi

    how did this get here I am not good with computer
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    I have no idea why people are taking a person named "redpillchick" seriously. I mean come on.
     
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    darkjedi

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    To answer your question about CNU, many people who constantly bash CNU don't really actually know much (or anything) about how the school operates; they just see the "new" and "for-profit" tag lines and think that it's the worst med school ever.

    One of my best friends is there right now and he's talked to me extensively about the school and it appears that things are going smoothly. Obviously with this past year being their first year there were some kinks to sort out but it appears as if the curriculum and exams and overall structure are fine and that the small issues (like hit and miss faculty) are there at every single school.
    For-profit is a pretty gigantic red flag and for that, I think, CNU deserves every criticism that's thrown at it.

    Cynics like to point out that a lot of universities still 'earn a profit' despite their non-profit status, however the for- and non- profit distinction is pretty large. For profit businesses will always have a fiduciary duty to their shareholders that trumps their own students. Money will go from student tuition and disappear into the ether of shareholder dividends.

    Academic non-profits will have different priorities and are pretty much required to reinvest their surplus revenue into themselves. They generally practice the concept of the double bottom line, where they stay financially solvent, while pursuing another end goal that is beyond profit, which for academic institutions is generally providing education and attaining prestige.
     
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    CyrilFiggis

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    I have no idea why people are taking a person named "redpillchick" seriously. I mean come on.
    I had no idea what that term even was.... I don't think she's a troll, i just think she has some "unique" perspectives on life. Hopefully an AdCom never finds her twitter - https://twitter.com/redpillchick

    cc: @Goro @DokterMom
    Maybe someone not cut for the profession.
     
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    PB&Jam

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    What does "redpillchick" even mean and why are people harping on it?
     
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