Mar 26, 2010
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I matched at my #8 out of 16 ranks for derm but I am unhappy with the result due to having to move my family. The program is not well recognized but the residents seemed nice on the day of the interview. Not only do I not like the school or city I have to move my family and my husband has to get a new job.

I am considering switching specialities to possibly anesthesiology. What should I do? I feel horrible :(:(
 

Doublecortin

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I matched at my #8 out of 16 ranks for derm but I am unhappy with the result due to having to move my family. The program is not well recognized but the residents seemed nice on the day of the interview. Not only do I not like the school or city I have to move my family and my husband has to get a new job.

I am considering switching specialities to possibly anesthesiology. What should I do? I feel horrible :(:(
wow!:eek:
 

asmallchild

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I matched at my #8 out of 16 ranks for derm but I am unhappy with the result due to having to move my family. The program is not well recognized but the residents seemed nice on the day of the interview. Not only do I not like the school or city I have to move my family and my husband has to get a new job.

I am considering switching specialities to possibly anesthesiology. What should I do? I feel horrible :(:(
I'd say give it a shot first.

If you leave, that will be it (in terms of breaking into dermatology again). They are serious when they say don't rank a program if you can't see yourself there.
 

DermMatch

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Based on your eagerness to switch into anesthesiology, I can only guess that you did not go into derm because you were intrinsically interested in skin.

That is unfortunate. I know many medical students and second-time applicants who not only did not get the double-digit count of interviews you got, but did not match at all.

Ideally, a personal accounting before you entered the match would have been good for the community of derm applicants to determine why you wanted to apply to derm.
 

tennisballs

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I totally understand where you are coming from (except I didn't actually have a derm spot secured). Location is extremely important, and of course your family is really important to you too! There were places for me that would have definitely been bad for me, but I ranked them anyway because I was scared (i.e. Marshfield Clinic - great program but it's in a city of 18K and 4 hours from Milwaukee and 3 hours from the twin cities and I am a beach guy who frowns when they say 20 degrees is pretty warm).

You can certainly like more than one specialty, just like you can like both apples and oranges. You can like both Snickers and Butterfinger. Hell, some people like both men AND women. It's okay to be specialty-curious --

With that said, I will present to you my perspective since I am someone who just switched to anesthesia.

Advantages:
1. I matched into a top-notch program with career opportunities out the wazoo when I finish.
2. Location is the PERFECT place for me. I don't have to move out to Utah or Wisconsin, which for some people is ideal, but not for a mingler like me (2 residents at Utah told me that I better find a wife before coming here or else I am doomed)
3. Great (and very happy) residents who are there because they chose to be there, not because they were forced to.

Good luck to you. You will probably receive some hostile feedback from some because they are jealous that you have a spot.
 
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It is much easier to say that you would move any where for derm than to actually do it.
 

mohderm

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My question is, why did you rank a place that you would be unhappy living? I can understand being alittle bummed, but after a few days being like "why was I bummed I'm gonna be a freakin dermatologist!"

I had one place I interviewed and decided I just could not see myself living there so I didn't rank it.

Not to keep questioning your decision, but you matched at your #8 of 16. Were #9-16 terrible as well? I guess I was wondering why you ranked it ahead of those other 8 programs?

Good luck with your decision. If you really like derm for derm then I think I know what you will do.
 

ChocolateKiss

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I read the post you made in the anesthesia forums. I find it surprising that the anesthesiologists are all so negative about anesthesia and unanimously and strongly advise you to do derm instead.

I guess you just have to weigh the pros and the cons.
 

Doublecortin

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Based on your eagerness to switch into anesthesiology, I can only guess that you did not go into derm because you were intrinsically interested in skin.

That is unfortunate. I know many medical students and second-time applicants who not only did not get the double-digit count of interviews you got, but did not match at all.

Ideally, a personal accounting before you entered the match would have been good for the community of derm applicants to determine why you wanted to apply to derm.
amen ,brother :thumbup:
 
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Thank you all for your responses. To all the future derm applicants, be careful for what you wish for ("I will go to any derm program") b/c you may get it. I just have a lot to think about before I make a decision.
 

Gimlet

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I read the post you made in the anesthesia forums. I find it surprising that the anesthesiologists are all so negative about anesthesia and unanimously and strongly advise you to do derm instead.

I guess you just have to weigh the pros and the cons.
I don't think anyone on the anesthesiology board is being negative about anesthesia...we're just being realistic about the questionable motive the OP has for wanting to switch to anesthesiology.

Regardless of the lack of commitment to Derm she's displaying after the match, her commitment to anesthesiology (having not even truly considered it before the match) is even less compelling. We're just looking out for her best interests.
 

SirCuneus

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Sorry to hear about your situation, derm155. You must've matched in New Mexico.
 

IzzyMD09

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I am so ecstatic I have to combine colloquialisms from both east and west coast into one statement

"Wicked Stoked"

I am so honored to have matched, I feel it is a crowning moment in my professional career, and to match at such a wonderful program that seemed so together and enthusiastic to have me as a resident there makes it all the better.

#1 Rank out of the 1 program I ranked

:D
 

opencomedo

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I know that having to move your family is important but you may want to consider what life will be like after the next 4 years. In anesthesia you will not have the same type of family life as you do in dermatology (although this shouldn't be a major deciding factor). I'm sorry that you went through the painful process of interviews/matching only to realize that derm might not work out (were the 8 schools below the one you matched at also bad locations too??). I'm just being pragmatic about the situation and not factoring in your internal desire to do anesthesia over derm. Good luck, in a nutshell I say stick with it, it's only 4 years in an undesirable place, and theres no guarantee you won't have to do the same thing with anesthesia
 

hoyden

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http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=713593

Knowing the type of person that matches into derm, I have a theory on the OP:

she knew from the very beginning that she's going to go into derm. The residency she matched into is in some goofy-ass location, but she ultimately doesn't care, it's derm, and she's going to go there. BUT, this provides her with the perfect opportunity to feign to her husband that her relationship with him and her family is more important than her career. She is such a mench that she will sacrifice her career-aspirations for the comfort of her family and go into another specialty because she loves them so much.

So after telling her husband of her plans, some tears (from the sink) were wiped and she went onto her laptop and posted this thread. Knowing she'd get 50 people telling her what a lunatic she is for giving up derm, she'd demurely show her husband the collective scream. Said husband feels obligated to clearly give his support for her to go into derm. In fact, he DEMANDS it! "We must go. You've worked too hard. You must pursue derm!"

The OP now gets a) derm, and b) a husband who thinks she's more concerned about his happiness than she really is.

Well played OP. It takes a special type of Type-A pathology to get into derm, and you've proven you have the muster.

(she will totally divorce his ass if this plan backfires)


My thoughts exactly after reading the OP postings outside this forum. Typical fine manipulations with a pretense of sacrifice.




I have elementary age children and my husband is supportive but I feel like I am punishing my family for the next 4 years plus at a program that I dont like.
Grow up, crybaby ;) And do not underestimate the others. Your gun may backfire :D
 

Urticaria

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Maybe you didn't really want derm in the first place and only thought you wanted it because everyone else wants it, you were competitive so you thought you had to go for it, you felt pressured to want it by others, etc. Now that you matched somewhere undesirable, maybe it's just making the reasons you went into derm more clear. I say really think about what you want, and if derm isn't right for you, for whatever reason, then go for what is. If you actually did want derm for what it is and are just bummed about the location, you'll get over it and enjoy your residency, but if it's that you didn't actually want derm in the first place, then switch.
 
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http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=713593





My thoughts exactly after reading the OP postings outside this forum. Typical fine manipulations with a pretense of sacrifice.






Grow up, crybaby ;) And do not underestimate the others. Your gun may backfire :D
I understand your hostility toward my statements. Moving to a new city with young children, finding a new home, schools, daycare, finding hubby a new job is not as easy as you would assume. But, probably I should accept that things happen for a reason.
 

hoyden

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I understand your hostility toward my statements. Moving to a new city with young children, finding a new home, schools, daycare, finding hubby a new job is not as easy as you would assume. But, probably I should accept that things happen for a reason.
Grow up, crybaby.
As if nobody had moved before[you], changed jobs or had young children. :laugh:
 

N-Surge

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Thank you all for your responses. To all the future derm applicants, be careful for what you wish for ("I will go to any derm program") b/c you may get it. I just have a lot to think about before I make a decision.
Some actually mean it deep down when they say this. And this may also be you too! I'd go back to the chalk board and go through the pro's and con's of your decision. And include your spouse in the process. The decision affects that person more than any of us.

I really never envisioned myself living somewhere without my extended family, ocean, lakes, Puget Sound, San Juan Islands, and mountains. I have no idea which way is North in the mid-west, it's true. I know where the trails are in Seattle. I am just learning where they are here in Indiana. IT'S ALL THE SAME EVERYWHERE HERE!!!! . But there are fine people here and I will be a Dermatologist because there is a place called flat land!

You can always relocate after the fact, no? :)

My advice, take the red pill.

 
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sore eye asses

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Alright derm155,

Here’s what you do:

First, you tell all these anesthesia num-nums to go F off with their iphone or place an a-line up their own ass into the inferior rectal artery.

Next, you go buy yourself a sack of peyote, and I’m not talking about a small sack here, either. Go buy yourself a big F-ing sack of peyote. If you have the resourcefulness to match into derm, then you can find a huge sack of mescaline.

Ok, now find the nearest desert and walk into it. Do not drive into it. Do not bicycle into it. Do not go by moped or hang glider. You walk your ass into that desert.

The doctor quest has begun…

Ok, now that you are in the desert, I hope you were smart enough to bring several key items: a hammer, six feet of twine, some tweezers, a swiss army knife (without the tweezers attachment), a walkman, a magnifying glass, and a book on desert survival tactics.

You have all this stuff, you say? Good! Now start walking whatever direction seems the most awesome to you. There is no right or wrong here. You are on a doctor quest.

Keep walking the same direction for 12 days and 12 nights without stopping for food or rest or water. After 12 days of this walking you will spot a rock outcropping in the distance that looks like a Sasquatch wrestling a dolphin (you’ll know it when you see it). Go to this rock outcropping and climb to the part where the Sasquatch is punching the dolphin in his blowhole. Crouch down in the divot that is the blowhole and make camp for the night. Build a huge fire and dance around it in a counterclockwise fashion whilst listening to Milli Vanilli’s “girl you know it’s true.” When you grow weary, take a seat at the edge of the fire and fish your peyote depot from your knapsack. Now, spread the peyote out on the earth and crush it with the palm of your hand, as your doctor ancestors did eons ago. Take this mash and shovel it into your maw. Swallow. With pride. Your doctor quest is nearing its purpose. You will feel a warmth begin to well up from inside you. Focus on this warmth, for it is your ticket to the fabled ‘Doctorland,’ where every doctor from the dawn of time has gone at one point or another to frolick and play amongst the other doctors and occasional PA or nurse practitioner who wanders in by accident. Cock your head to the heavens, look at the western night sky. Marvel at the cosmos in all its infinite glory. Focus on the warmth…look there! What do you see! Why, it’s the Space Unicorn of legend! The very one who transports doctors who are on doctor quests to Doctorland. Say hello to the Unicorn! Beckon to him. His toll is unfathomable, his price near impossible, but you stand resolute at the Sasquatch precipice. The majestic unicorn is now only feet away, and he bellows in an ancient tongue “I am here to take you to Doctorland, Derm155!!! In order for me to undertake this perilous journey, I require several key items as payment!! Do you have a hammer, tweezers, six feet of twine, magnifying glass, swiss army knife without the tweezers attachment, and a book on desert survival tactics??!! You do? Well, by all means, hop on my back then! We’re going to Doctorland!!!” You must mount this steed.

Your answers lie just beyond the clouds…
 

DermMatch

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At least a few of the programs you ranked from 1 through 7 most likely required your family to move from your current home. No metro region has seven derm programs, except Chicago, which comes close with six.

Therefore, I would hazard that your unhappiness with your match is actually based on your perception that it is not as prestigious as the seven you ranked ahead of it:

http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=713593

I am going to weigh the pro and cons of moving my family from this program. Another reason I don't like the program is it is not well recognized and I want to enter academics later. The other schools lower on my list were not as good either in my opinion.
As a medical student, you are in no position judge the qualities of a residency program based on a superficial day-long visit. Certainly, you are not a dermatologist, and it is the height of arrogance that you would consider your judgment of "good" and "bad" programs to have any real validity.

Feeling that you deserve to be happy because you've worked so hard (see previous link for quote) probably stems from your sense that you deserved to be at a "better" program, when in reality ALL derm programs are highly competitive. Digging deeper, I wouldn't be surprised that you wanted dermatology because it's perceived as prestigious, and you wanted a "good" program because you also wanted the prestige that comes with that.

If your claimed academic interest in skin was real, you would currently be grateful for matching at all, since any program can fulfill your stated desire to enter academics. I highly doubt none of your faculty members are publishing. Even if they aren't, you can undertake case reports, case series, and clinical studies on your initiative if you ask for their support.

None of your declarations, of course, really have anything to do with your claimed deep-seated academic interest in skin, because if they did, you wouldn't even consider an anesthesiology residency. And really, why anesthesiology and not, say, family medicine? If you went into family medicine, or even internal medicine, you'd get one-thousand-times more exposure to skin than in anesthesiology. Prestigious family medicine programs would be falling all over themselves to have you as a resident.

I'd hazard to guess that your flirtation with anesthesiology is based on the fact that it's part of the ROAD, and on balance, you want the money and prestige that comes with being in the company of radiologists, ophthalmologists, and dermatologists.

Many, many people would have loved your spot -- would have loved to interview, and would have loved to match. Your ingratitude is galling.
 

MrKite

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Sore eye, I need to prophylactically place a Foley before I read any more of your posts. If the whole derm thing doesn't work out (or even if it does), you have a place in stand up.

DermMatch, you pulled my thoughts right out of my brain and put them into cyberspace.
 
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The other schools I ranked 1-7 were close to my home town or ones my husband visited and knew people who lived there. I do like derm but until you are in a similar situation like mine you cannot even begin to understand where I am coming from. Like I said earlier thank you for all your comments.
 

porokeratosis

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I matched at my #8 out of 16 ranks for derm but I am unhappy with the result due to having to move my family. The program is not well recognized but the residents seemed nice on the day of the interview. Not only do I not like the school or city I have to move my family and my husband has to get a new job.

I am considering switching specialities to possibly anesthesiology. What should I do? I feel horrible :(:(
If you reject your Derm residency acceptance, I'm sure the residency program can easily replace you. There are many qualified applicants out there who did not get in, and I'm pretty sure many would love an opportunity.

Just know this...if you reject Derm residency, then you probably will NEVER ever become a dermatologist! Derm is a small field and everyone knows each other. So make your choice wisely.
 

Dermocrat

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I haven't posted anything on here in a year. You've brought me out of hiding.

1. As others have pointed out, it's unfortunate that you ranked programs you wouldn't be happy at. You interviewed at 16 places--you had the leeway to drop a couple. But there's nothing to be done about this.

2. No place in the US where there is a Derm program is soooo bad that you can't move there for four years. I grew up near a big city and moved to a small town for medical school, and I had a great time. And when I was done, I was ready to leave with no regrets.

3. The fact that your children are in elementary school should not be a big deal. Kids all over the world move when they are in elementary school and adjust very well. Children are resilient. I moved twice when I was a kid, and I'd say I turned out pretty well. In fact, I have a freaking huge friend list on facebook because I went to school in 3 different cities.

4. I'm assuming your husband vetted your list before you submitted it. If he didn't, first off, that is ridiculous. Secondly, if he's willing to move, I don't think there's much to argue against it. Since you did enter into a binding contract and all.

5. As for going into academics, you can do it from any dermatology program. You don't have to have training from an academic powerhouse. If you hadn't noticed, dermatology programs starve for faculty.

All of that said, good luck with your decision. I can imagine your stress level.
 

kralwok

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i totally understand where you are coming from. if you want to do derm then you need to stick it out. kids are resilient, and your hubby should just suck it up. sure they will be sacrificing for you, but they will also meet new people and see new things. it won't be all bad. in fact, it will probably be mostly good. it will be an adventure, and when it is over you can move wherever you'd like. when it's time to move again then you can sacrifice for your husband. that's how marriage works. i was in a similar position and was prepared to move b/c derm is what i want.
i think you will be in deep doo doo if you back out b/c it will be a match violation...
 

reno911

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5. As for going into academics, you can do it from any dermatology program. You don't have to have training from an academic powerhouse. If you hadn't noticed, dermatology programs starve for faculty.
This is absolutely true. I've never really understood why people think that getting and academic dermatology position is difficult. For most academic programs to hire you all you need is to be board eligible and have a pulse. The former can be accomplished by going to any accredited program.

One caveat is that this only applies if you want to do general medical derm (or peds). If you want a Mohs or Dermpath position at an academic institution, it is a little harder, because those positions are a little more scarce. But those jobs are more scarce in the private sector as well.
 

DermMatch

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I moved to a strange city that I did not like for my residency. My significant other also had to relocate. We had no friends in the area and had to start from scratch. So while I am not in your shoes, I have had to make the adjustments that you are anticipating.

Your arguments are multi-layered, and an overweening focus on prestige with a lack of true interest in skin is included.
 

sore eye asses

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Please someone take this thread out back behind the barn and put it down, Old Yeller style.

The following is the subtext to this entire thread:

Derm155: "Waaaahhhhh, I hate the number 8!!"

Someone else: You should stop whining and stay in derm.

Derm155: But my situation is so unique and horrible.

Someone else: I did exactly what you have to do, and I survived. Your situation is not unique.

Derm155: But I am a special snowflake. My situation is unique. I appreciate all your comments immensely, especially all those where you tell me I'm a whining baby. There is no passive aggression in this comment. Validate meee!!!

Someone else: academic derm blah, prestige blah, husband blah, kids blah, moving is hard blah.

Derm155: Yeah, but you've not validated me yet. You've not told me it's alright to feel the way that I'm feeling. That I did the right thing to come to this anonymous board to seek your sycophantic praise. That I am special because I did not match at my 9-16. That I am as great as I've always believed.


This thread has rabies. It's mad. Travis, get yer gun.
 

Substance

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Please someone take this thread out back behind the barn and put it down, Old Yeller style.

The following is the subtext to this entire thread:

Derm155: "Waaaahhhhh, I hate the number 8!!"

Someone else: You should stop whining and stay in derm.

Derm155: But my situation is so unique and horrible.

Someone else: I did exactly what you have to do, and I survived. Your situation is not unique.

Derm155: But I am a special snowflake. My situation is unique. I appreciate all your comments immensely, especially all those where you tell me I'm a whining baby. There is no passive aggression in this comment. Validate meee!!!

Someone else: academic derm blah, prestige blah, husband blah, kids blah, moving is hard blah.

Derm155: Yeah, but you've not validated me yet. You've not told me it's alright to feel the way that I'm feeling. That I did the right thing to come to this anonymous board to seek your sycophantic praise. That I am special because I did not match at my 9-16. That I am as great as I've always believed.


This thread has rabies. It's mad. Travis, get yer gun.
I really enjoy the sound of a shotgun being cocked. I think I played too much Doom II.
 

sensitive skin

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I can't *quite* commiserate with you, but I did not have a good match day either...for completely different reasons.

I matched at the #7 on my list of 12, but this was my personal #1 at one of the biggest programs in the country, in major metropolitan area (NYC). I rotated here and absolutely fell in love. Everybody else in my family - my parents, my husband, even his parents - all blamed me for "not trying hard enough" to stay in my home city, even though I ranked all them all at the top. Specifically, my parents advised me NOT to rank any programs in other cities because it was too far away from home. Seriously.

Can you imagine MY heartbreak after Match Day?

It went on for several weeks, months. My parents still blame me, even now. They can't be 100% happy for me. My husband seriously told me to become a stay-at-home wife. He asked the question, "Is derm special enough to you, that you'd move away from home?" (He is not in the medical field). Then he asked, "Why don't you go into a different specialty so you can do a residency at home?" He asked both question this weekend as I was apartment hunting with him in the new city. He made me feel awful all weekend.

In any case, I'm supremely happy I matched at a program I loved, even if I have to "leave" all my friends and family. I'll make new ones. My husband will find a new job (begrudgingly). I'm trying my best not to let others spoil my happiness.
 

Substance

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I can't *quite* commiserate with you, but I did not have a good match day either...for completely different reasons.

I matched at the #7 on my list of 12, but this was my personal #1 at one of the biggest programs in the country, in major metropolitan area (NYC). I rotated here and absolutely fell in love. Everybody else in my family - my parents, my husband, even his parents - all blamed me for "not trying hard enough" to stay in my home city, even though I ranked all them all at the top. Specifically, my parents advised me NOT to rank any programs in other cities because it was too far away from home. Seriously.

Can you imagine MY heartbreak after Match Day?

It went on for several weeks, months. My parents still blame me, even now. They can't be 100% happy for me. My husband seriously told me to become a stay-at-home wife. He asked the question, "Is derm special enough to you, that you'd move away from home?" (He is not in the medical field). Then he asked, "Why don't you go into a different specialty so you can do a residency at home?" He asked both question this weekend as I was apartment hunting with him in the new city. He made me feel awful all weekend.

In any case, I'm supremely happy I matched at a program I loved, even if I have to "leave" all my friends and family. I'll make new ones. My husband will find a new job (begrudgingly). I'm trying my best not to let others spoil my happiness.
Divorce.
 

PortyVino

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I feel you Derm155. Match day was tough for me last year, i was hoping to match on the west coast to be close to family, friends but ended up matching in the Midwest. My husband, then fiance, was crushed and to move and he thought "it would mean the end of his career." However, you have a year of internship before the big move and time to find aspects of your future program and city that you will enjoy. You just have to have a positive outlook. My husband and I are both very excited about the upcoming move now as we have worked things out so that we will both be doing what we want to do. I will say that it took plenty of tears and long discussions and some luck to get to this point.
 
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I am moving now bc I matched in a categorical program so my husband has to find a new job now. I understand where u r coming from sensitive skin, but the difference is that you like your program and I don't. Everyone here can continue to make me feel bad but it does not matter because I stand by my statements. Most of you got exactly what you wanted not me plus having to hurt my family makes this a double whammy.
 

dermatophyte

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my thoughts exactly, tennisballs! i know of applicants who did not even get their #10, even after interviewing at powerhouse programs. sounds like the OP would rather be unmatched than be at her matched program - unfortunate for everyone that she ranked it. there are MORE than enough "deserving" applicants, and everyone has their own personal situations they have to deal with. the match works out so that applicants get into their most desired program that also wants them.

derm155, you should do what makes you happy. you never want to regret what you do and say what if? i think you know what your priorities are, so be true to that
 

Doublecortin

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I am moving now bc I matched in a categorical program so my husband has to find a new job now. I understand where u r coming from sensitive skin, but the difference is that you like your program and I don't. Everyone here can continue to make me feel bad but it does not matter because I stand by my statements. Most of you got exactly what you wanted not me plus having to hurt my family makes this a double whammy.
:eek: wow. The height of arrogance and a gigantic sense of entitelment
 

DermMatch

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(1) Interestingly, I matched at my No. 8 in a city I disliked, and still dislike.

(2) I know of a person who interviewed at 20+ places and matched towards the bottom of their rank list.

(3) I feel sorry for your future coresidents and faculty colleagues, because I don't think your attitude is limited to your Match outcome -- it likely permeates your perspective about many things in life, and reflects a basic character trait. I predict that your road through residency will be marked by complaining about being treated "unfairly": You will likely be the first to complain about your call schedule, being pulled to cover another person in clinic, seeing one more patient than your coresident, being asked to present more than your equal share of articles in journal club -- the potential list goes on.
 
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The funny thing about many of these comments is that most of the derm applicants know that one of the reasons they are chose derm was because of the lifestyle and possibly its prestige/competiveness. Of course you must like skin to do it otherwise you would do radiology or anesthesiology. I am just being real with all my comments.
 

sensitive skin

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:eek:

DON'T DO IT OR EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!

In the end, he'll be more grateful to you and whatever lucky stars brought him to you when derm starts to pay off! AND you'll be grateful you stuck it out.

Okay, okay. I/we just had a really rough weekend rehashing all of the Match Day unhappiness (his/my parents/his parents, ergo me). We'll be okay.

Consequently, he has made the decision to stay in our home city for the first year. He can't leave his work nor his friends. He will join me later.

:thumbdown:

Can't imagine what it's like with kids...derm155.

Bah, at least I'm still in derm! Still feel like a rockstar! :love:
 

asmallchild

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The funny thing about many of these comments is that most of the derm applicants know that one of the reasons they are chose derm was because of the lifestyle and possibly its prestige/competiveness. Of course you must like skin to do it otherwise you would do radiology or anesthesiology. I am just being real with all my comments.
Your comments seem to indicate those were the only reasons you opted for this field. Which is why the responses haven't been warm and fuzzy for the most part.
 

sore eye asses

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Okay, okay. I/we just had a really rough weekend rehashing all of the Match Day unhappiness (his/my parents/his parents, ergo me). We'll be okay.

Consequently, he has made the decision to stay in our home city for the first year. He can't leave his work nor his friends. He will join me later.

:thumbdown:

Can't imagine what it's like with kids...derm155.

Bah, at least I'm still in derm! Still feel like a rockstar! :love:
In the next year I predict you will meet a charming, handsome man who is hung like a Clydesdale. He will buy you roses by the thousands and kiss your neck ever so tenderly.

When your husband joins you later, you will just hold up a ruler, look at his package quizzically, shake your head in shame, and say "I don't think this is going to work out."

as for you, derm155, you're just so real. I mean, dang girl, your realness is just blowin my mind. Seriously, how does one keep it so mother f'ing real? When god created the idea of reality, he must've had you in mind. I just looked up the word real in the dictionary, and it showed a picture of evander holyfield and derm155.
 

reno911

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I can't *quite* commiserate with you, but I did not have a good match day either...for completely different reasons.

I matched at the #7 on my list of 12, but this was my personal #1 at one of the biggest programs in the country, in major metropolitan area (NYC). I rotated here and absolutely fell in love. Everybody else in my family - my parents, my husband, even his parents - all blamed me for "not trying hard enough" to stay in my home city, even though I ranked all them all at the top. Specifically, my parents advised me NOT to rank any programs in other cities because it was too far away from home. Seriously.

Can you imagine MY heartbreak after Match Day?

It went on for several weeks, months. My parents still blame me, even now. They can't be 100% happy for me. My husband seriously told me to become a stay-at-home wife. He asked the question, "Is derm special enough to you, that you'd move away from home?" (He is not in the medical field). Then he asked, "Why don't you go into a different specialty so you can do a residency at home?" He asked both question this weekend as I was apartment hunting with him in the new city. He made me feel awful all weekend.

In any case, I'm supremely happy I matched at a program I loved, even if I have to "leave" all my friends and family. I'll make new ones. My husband will find a new job (begrudgingly). I'm trying my best not to let others spoil my happiness.
Wow. Either your husband and family are unfathomably selfish or they just do not understand what an amazing opportunity you have and how difficult it is to get. However, I assume you explained all of this to them, which makes me think it's probably the former. In any case, good luck and I hope it all works out.
 

Eta Carinae

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Okay, okay. I/we just had a really rough weekend rehashing all of the Match Day unhappiness (his/my parents/his parents, ergo me). We'll be okay.

Consequently, he has made the decision to stay in our home city for the first year. He can't leave his work nor his friends. He will join me later.

:thumbdown:
:highfive:
Glad to hear it. No residency/career path is worth ending a (good) marriage for...especially on the spur of the moment.



Can't imagine what it's like with kids...derm155.
:sleep:
Please, give me a break!
I've never encountered such an entitled ingrate in my life.

Sounds like someone who's been told all her life she's special and deserves to have anything she desires, at anyone else's expense and in fact, the sun revolves around her...


Bah, at least I'm still in derm! Still feel like a rockstar! :love:
Can I just say, I love your attitude right now- the immense gratitude in spite of the fact you matched #7/12. Perhaps 155 can learn a thing or two from you.
And yes, you deserve to feel like a rockstar. C'mon, IT IS DERM!
 

DermMatch

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derm155, unlike you, I actually *love* skin and would never in a million years do rads, anesthesiology, or ophtho -- not even if you gave me the lifestyle or the $.

Radiologists hands-down make more than the average dermatologist. A weekend of at-home call can net you insane amounts (I recall the number "$1000" being bantered around for a DAY of work). However, I would rather gouge my eyes out than examine billions of CT scans looking for that one little something. And interventional? I'll pass on the radiation exposure.

I admire anesthesiologists, and loved rotating through the department because all of them were very cool people. However, it's way too stressful for me to be in charge of someone's breathing and heartbeat. What do they say about it? "Stretches of utter boredom punctuated by periods of sheer terror."

Ophtho was too... focused. And learning optics? Again, pass.

Derm is the perfect blend of IM, peds, ID, rheumatology, onc, and procedures. Of course, I'm not naive about the ancillary benefits, but the subject matter is actually -- gasp -- interesting.

There's no way -- even if R, O, or A offered me the lifestyle and cash -- that I'd go into those three fields.

Anyway, I also predict you'll do dermsurg because it's the most competitive subspecialty of the most competitive field in medicine, and you make the most money. Not because you love Mohs.
 
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155, having even entertained the thought of switching career choices proves that you are not passionate about dermatology. Therefore, I would suggest applying to another specialty that you would be happy in and is in a more ideal location for your family. You would make your life happier and also create a spot for someone who truly is committed to this field.