Calming Down

[clinicalpsyapp]

Just wondering if anyone else is going through this... I talked to some other first-years in my program and I don't think anyone else completely understood. But I know SDN'ers are a different breed, so I thought I would check here

Anyway, I'm in my first year in a clinical psych phd program (just finished a counseling master's program at another school). I'm at a great school with a great mentor. My lab is awesome because I will never have to collect my own data for my dissertation--we have thousands of participants with thousands of variables that I would be interested in. Externship sites for my clinical focus area are a sure thing. However, I can't seem to drop the attitude that I constantly need to be concerned about putting a lot of effort into getting the experiences I need to succeed (e.g. in my master's program I had to go to another department to get research experience and created my own practicum site). I've been having trouble just slowing down and enjoying being a first year without the practica and research responsibilities that will come in later years. I've been having so much difficulty dropping that attitude that my advisor had to sit me down the other day and say "calm down!"

I know that we still have plenty of things we need to build up or CV's for, etc. but I think it's hard to remind myself that one of the biggest hurdles is already over with and it's ok to chill out for a little bit. Can anyone else relate?

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[Jezebel09]

Just wondering if anyone else is going through this... I talked to some other first-years in my program and I don't think anyone else completely understood. But I know SDN'ers are a different breed, so I thought I would check here

Anyway, I'm in my first year in a clinical psych phd program (just finished a counseling master's program at another school). I'm at a great school with a great mentor. My lab is awesome because I will never have to collect my own data for my dissertation--we have thousands of participants with thousands of variables that I would be interested in. Externship sites for my clinical focus area are a sure thing. However, I can't seem to drop the attitude that I constantly need to be concerned about putting a lot of effort into getting the experiences I need to succeed (e.g. in my master's program I had to go to another department to get research experience and created my own practicum site). I've been having trouble just slowing down and enjoying being a first year without the practica and research responsibilities that will come in later years. I've been having so much difficulty dropping that attitude that my advisor had to sit me down the other day and say "calm down!"

I know that we still have plenty of things we need to build up or CV's for, etc. but I think it's hard to remind myself that one of the biggest hurdles is already over with and it's ok to chill out for a little bit. Can anyone else relate?

Sounds like you're a type A personality. You're in good company. I saw many of them in my master's program and again now in my PhD program.
Did your advisor's advice to "calm down" actually work for you??? I am thinking about the people in my classes who have been type As, and that just would not have worked. . . .

The good news: It sounds like your master's program prepared you well for your PhD program. Since your professor wants you to relax a bit, it is obvious that s/he thinks you're doing just fine.

 

[erg923]

Might wanna clarify what people are perceiving from you.

"Calm down" as in you're restless and seething with too much ambition or worrying about too many future projects, or "calm down" as in you are coming off as an anxiety-ridden spaz and they're worried about your stability or mental health?

 

[clinicalpsyapp]

Might wanna clarify what people are perceiving from you.

"Calm down" as in you're restless and seething with too much ambition or worrying about too many future projects, or "calm down" as in you are coming off as an anxiety-ridden spaz and they're worried about your stability or mental health?

Good point... but no, she definitely was clear in that I was being too ambitious and trying to take on too much at once, not that she was worried about my stability or mental health.

And the way that she talked to me did help, because she was saying that most of her students have ended up in the internship sites and professional positions that I am shooting for. I obviously already knew that, which is why I chose this program, but it was nice to hear. I think her main point was to stop worrying myself trying to figure out what to do and develop future projects, because that's what she's there for. I mean, I'll always have a type A personality, but it's actually kind of comforting knowing that I can finally rely on someone else to guide me--I've never really had mentorship like that.

 

[docma]

Mindfulness practice. It does take practice. It is an invaluable professional tool.

 

[zzzz2]

Good point... but no, she definitely was clear in that I was being too ambitious and trying to take on too much at once, not that she was worried about my stability or mental health.

And the way that she talked to me did help, because she was saying that most of her students have ended up in the internship sites and professional positions that I am shooting for. I obviously already knew that, which is why I chose this program, but it was nice to hear. I think her main point was to stop worrying myself trying to figure out what to do and develop future projects, because that's what she's there for. I mean, I'll always have a type A personality, but it's actually kind of comforting knowing that I can finally rely on someone else to guide me--I've never really had mentorship like that.

It's a fine line between being complacent and over-ambitious. First year you should totally feel good about getting into a great program. Then you will realize there are about 10,000 milestones a head of you which propel you to move forward.

 

[futureapppsy2]

I received this advice in undergrad (in the "over ambitious" vein, not the "anxiety ridden spaz" vein) and at first found it contradictory and odd (because I want[ed] to everything I could to procure excellent experience and prepare myself for grad school/internships/job/etc) until I realized that it didn't mean "stop working hard" so much as it meant "work smart"--ensure that you can do excellent work that doesn't bear the ill-effects of being over-committed. For me, taking this advice has helped me form a more sold, directed research agenda/profile. I still work very hard, of course, but I think about how each potential project plays into the broader scope of what I'm doing as a whole. I have had to learn to say "no" to opportunities sometimes, which is hard but ultimately better than doing subpar or scattered work.

FWIW, you're in good company. I used this (being overly ambitious) as my "weakness" during interviews, and a lot of the faculty I interviewed with identified with the same tendency as well!