class of 2013 and all in need, Did someone tell you you couldn't?

[ForPainting]

At the risk of sounding spiteful I have to open up this forum for everyone who was told they couldn't be a vet, shouldn't be a vet or wouldn't be a vet. I had my heart broken by someone I loved who said "pick between me or vet school".
long story short, c/o 2013

So I figure, everyone needs a place to come to when they are contemplating sacrificing the dream, a place where we can all vent and support one another and validate eachother-

Post away.

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[Airborne Vet]

My parents.

As always, listen to everyone's input and advice...but make make your own decision.

 

[sumstorm]

Yuck. I don't do ultimatems. I can't be bothered to have people in my life who say can't/won't. I will take lack of support over negativity any day.

I have heard comments like 'you should be a human doctor' but I don't think that has anything to do with whether or not I would be a good vet, or if being a vet is the best choice for me, as much as thier belief that my abilities would serve more usefullness to society as a medical doctor and would provide a better return for myself in the financial realm.

I was teased all the time as a child about being a 'vet school flunky' but the joke was that vet school flunky = human doctor.

I fear that when people demand another individual sacrifice a major goal in thier lives, they will later demand the sacrifice of other goals and desires (with the thought of 'well, if they gave up GGG for me, giving up ttt wont' be as big of a deal.) To me, it is a controlling personality.

Or the opposit will happen...the person who sacrifices the dream will resent it later on, which isn't fair to either party as well.

Finally, there are difference between demanding sacrifices/ultimatems and determining that you/your lifestyle can't handle a certain path. A person who hates life disruptions shouldn't be with a person who wants to pick up and relocate every year. A person who really wants to have children in the next 5 years shouldn't be with someone who feels they will never want children. Sometimes people just aren't made to be together.

I told my husband, early in our dating relationship, that I did not see us getting married as long as he continued to view his stepsons (not biologically related to either of us) as the small children they were when he lived with them rather than the obnoxious, drunk teenager they are now. I was not opposed to dating, because I didn't care if we got married or not...but he did care, so I was honest about what would block that opportunity. So, understanding the viewpoint might help...and it might be time to move on.

This acceptance puts a kink in our plans to have kids. We will need to address that at some point. The economy puts a lot of pressure on us (including the lack of bonuses that are suppose to pay for my education) but we will figure that out as well. Sometimes the easiest question to ask is 'if this was a good friend instead of an SO, what would I do?' and 'if a good friend was telling me this situation, what would I advise him/her to do?' which will often guide you to the best decisions for yourself.

 

[rachroo]

I had my heart broken by someone I loved who said "pick between me or vet school".

Yikes!! I'm sorry that you have to be put in that situation!

In the end, it is your decision. In my case I wouldn't want to be with someone who gave me that ultimatem and who either couldn't or wouldn't support my life-long dream. But, again, that's just me.

On the other side, I had a friend who gave up her vet school dream (but her now husband didn't demand she choose that....she chose that decision herself) to get married/plan on having kids within the next couple years and she is very happy.

So, think about yourself 10 years from now. Where do you see yourself? What would make you complete since it is your life you need to live (and hopefully that would include a more supportive SO!) So basically, which would make you happier--being with your current SO and not being a vet or being a vet and not being with your current SO? Good luck to you and whatever happens!

 

[alonepear]

I've had two that have had a lasting impression:

An old friend (friend no longer), and the NC State admissions guy.

I was two years out of college when I decided to apply to vet school. I knew it would be an uphill battle because I had extra courses to complete, a miserable GPA to fix, and NO experience at that point. Everyone was supportive of me except one "friend" who insisted on multiple occasions that I was making a huge mistake. His old girlfriend had strived to be a vet her whole life, and it took her 3 application cycles to even get admitted, so how did I think I had a chance, making the decision so late in my life? He insisted it would therefore take me a minimum of 3 applications to even have a shot. I wanted SO BAD to get in on my first application, almost not so much to get in but to prove him wrong!! Unfortunately, my first application was woefully unprepared, and I knew it, but I just wanted to get my name out there and get started while I was getting experience. BUT luckily I did get in to TWO schools on my second round, and I haven't spoken to my old "friend" since 2005....

The admissions staff at NC State (my in-state school) used to meet with every applicant individually and go through applications in detail to help you get in the next year (which I still think was a really good idea and they should have continued doing it...) The one admin guy I met with was nice enough throughout the entire process, pointing out some of my strengths and weaknesses, until we got to the grades/GPA section. He flat out told me that with a 3.2 I would NEVER ever get into vet school, and that I needed to pursue another undergraduate degree to get my GPA up in order to have a fighting shot, and that I should definitely not bother applying the following year. I suppose, now, I understand he was probably talking about me getting into NCSU, because I just didn't have the GPA to make their cuts, but he pretty much crushed my spirit for a few good weeks. Luckily I didn't listen to him (about not applying -- I did follow the rest of his advice), and I somehow managed to be admitted to two out-of-state schools. It may be more expensive, but at least I'll end up at the same place =)

Don't let ANYBODY tell you you can't! I'm so lucky to have the worlds most supportive parents, boyfriend and friends, who would stick by my side no matter what I choose to do with my career.

 

[sumstorm]

I think a real friend will sit you down, tell you they are concerned about what you are doing, share those concerns, then say 'if you have thought about all of this and still want to do it, I will keep those thoughts to myself.' I think sometimes people confuse life long general effort with highly concentrated maximum effort and don't realize that the two can be comparable.

As for the NCSU ad-com.... does't NCSU have a grade cut off of 3.3 for IS? I am not sure any school could give you great advice in what will/won't work for all other schools (heck, I can't figure that out and I tried for a year.) I am glad you tried again...but it sounds like he was giving you realistic advice about the admissions procedure for NCSU (since thier grade forgiveness is for GPA's near the minimum with extremly great performance in all other aspects.)

 

[halesvet]

Fortunately my parents have been nothing but supportive of my dream which i think has helped me the most, but a two people in school told me I shouldn't waste by time

My guidance counciler told me that because i scored so high on mechanical/3-D manipulation that I should stop wasting my time with this crazy idea and become a mechanic instead.

A partner and I had to pick an occupation to present on in my 9th grade english class and we picked veterinarian. At the end of the presentation, the teach said that we would be better off trying to become neurosurgeons instead of vets. Now I want to go back and give her a piece of my mind, c/o 2013.

 

[alonepear]

As for the NCSU ad-com.... does't NCSU have a grade cut off of 3.3 for IS? I am not sure any school could give you great advice in what will/won't work for all other schools (heck, I can't figure that out and I tried for a year.) I am glad you tried again...but it sounds like he was giving you realistic advice about the admissions procedure for NCSU (since thier grade forgiveness is for GPA's near the minimum with extremly great performance in all other aspects.)

They probably do now, although when I was applying I know that I met all the requirements for "alternative eligibility" since I had been out of school for a while. It was just the way he told me flat out that if I didn't go get another degree, I'd never have a shot. I even asked him if just taking a few more classes to up my GPA would help, and he told me nope. He told me I was an "academic risk." Although, I am actually glad for this experience now, because it pushed me to be the exact opposite of an "academic risk" once I did start vet school, and I managed a 4.0 for an entire year, for the first time in my life. So I suppose I owe him a thank you!! And while I would have loved to stay home in Raleigh and go to NCSU, my tarheel heart might have died a little inside attending state

 

[BlistexWorks]

My undergraduate advisor told me not even to apply to vet school mostly because of my low GRE scores (<1000 , took it twice). I was really bummed after our initial meetings and started to think about what else I could do for a living. She even continued to question my ability to pass the NAVLE due to my low GRE scores! I did well on the math section but the verbal section totally pulled my score down due to English being my second learned language. Ha! I am a pretty humble person, but I'll take the courage to say I've been accepted to 6 schools so far, been waitlisted at one, and I'm waiting to hear from two other schools I had the opportunity to interview. I almost took the advisor's advice and to not apply this first year, but, well, I guess I'm glad I applied!

 

[LVT2DVM]

Every school I've applied too thus far.

Seriously...... Determination is my first, middle and last name.

Never, ever, ever double dog dare an ARIES.

 

[karmapple]

This thread brings to mind a job interview I once had years back. I was applying for a vet assistant job, and I was desperate because I had minimal experience. Several other places had already turned me down.

The office manager took me into her office and was looking over my application and said, "So you want to go to vet school?" I answered in the affirmative and she said, "Well, do you have a 4.0 GPA?"
"No," I said, "but I..."
She immediately cut me off and waved her hand dismissively in my direction and said "You're not going to vet school, then."
I tried to explain politely that I knew the average GPA of an accepted vet student was very high, but it wasn't a 4.0, and she cut me off again and said coldly, "NOBODY gets into vet school without a 4.0 GPA."

The interview was pretty much over after that, even though I tried as hard as I could to impress and appease her. I didn't get the job, and I left there feeling so defeated.

 

[TSUJC]

My primary investigator AND my department head both told me that I should stay in the research field because it was very unlikely that I would ever get accepted to vet school. My department head told me that based on my grades, my future career goals were unrealistic. My PI said that I should focus more on my research and less on my applications because my chances were so low.

It felt SOO good to tell them.... guess what I GOT ACCEPTED!

I think their negativity pushed me even harder.

 

[ckd816]

I haven't even applied yet, but several people have made it sound impossible or highly unlikely that vet school will happen for me. Just the other day I was talking with some lady who sits next to me in one of my classes and she insisted that no one gets into vet school without a 4.0 GPA. When I tried to tell her that several people with less than perfect grades get in and that it's the entire application that is under consideration, she pretty much dismissed me. Then, one time I was observing a surgery at my old work and I was talking to the vet. Although it is a good thing to think about, I was seriously taken by surprise when he asked, "What will you do with your Biology degree if you don't get in?" I don't think it was harsh, but it wasn't exactly a boost of confidence either.

 

[ckgilabert]

i got into colorado's vet prep program and i'm super excited about that. WELL, i went to tell one of my advisors that wrote me a LOR and he was like "ok, let me get this straight, you go for a year, then you definitely go to vet school?" and i was like "YEAH, isnt that great" and he was like "yeah, thats still good". wtf? i wanted to say "hey...be excited with me!". lol.


oh, and a couple of years ago I went to Western's open house...and during lunch a professor or a staff member can sit with your table. WELL, i ask the professor "i am an intern at a vet clinic and they offerred me a job, but i'm really involved in school and i have a lot of classes and I dont want to accept the job because i dont want them to depend on me if i dont have the time"

and i wanted to ask "do i have to be employed or can i just be a volunteer and get my vet experience from that"

WELL, she didnt even give me the chance to finish!!! she cut me off and said "western is looking for dependable people"

i turned red, got all sad. anyway, 6 months later i asked to be an employee and worked like 5-10hrs a week because i was still super busy and would rather have better grades than tons of hours, you know?

anyway, they basically discouraged me and it really sucked.

 

[sunnex3]

i haven't applied yet...
but my mom and my sister, plus my uncle & aunt have always been super supportive of me.

but i guess my dad has never been supportive which has been hard because i'm so close to him...he used to when i was like in middle school, i guess just to make me feel good, but as i entered college he has always wanted to be a human doctor instead...he thinks it'll be more "worth my time" to save a "human life"

 

[sumstorm]

They probably do now, although when I was applying I know that I met all the requirements for "alternative eligibility" since I had been out of school for a while. It was just the way he told me flat out that if I didn't go get another degree, I'd never have a shot. I even asked him if just taking a few more classes to up my GPA would help, and he told me nope. He told me I was an "academic risk." Although, I am actually glad for this experience now, because it pushed me to be the exact opposite of an "academic risk" once I did start vet school, and I managed a 4.0 for an entire year, for the first time in my life. So I suppose I owe him a thank you!! And while I would have loved to stay home in Raleigh and go to NCSU, my tarheel heart might have died a little inside attending state

Yeah...they told me it was only for those who were off by tenths of points GPA wise. I found out the hard way that extra classes won't do much to offset 4 years worth of GPA. I took 18 credit hours with 4.0 this year (pt) which only moved my GPA from a 3.36 to a 3.39. Now that I won't be working FT while attending school, I think I have a chance to be more successful academicly. Congrats on the 4.0!

 

[bunnity]

i haven't applied yet...
but my mom and my sister, plus my uncle & aunt have always been super supportive of me.

but i guess my dad has never been supportive which has been hard because i'm so close to him...he used to when i was like in middle school, i guess just to make me feel good, but as i entered college he has always wanted to be a human doctor instead...he thinks it'll be more "worth my time" to save a "human life"

Tell him that vets DO save human lives by protecting humans from zoonotic disease by vaccinating and treating animals and by keeping our food supply safe. Hman medicine and vet medicine are symbiotic and benefit from each other's research as well.

 

[sumstorm]

Then, one time I was observing a surgery at my old work and I was talking to the vet. Although it is a good thing to think about, I was seriously taken by surprise when he asked, "What will you do with your Biology degree if you don't get in?" I don't think it was harsh, but it wasn't exactly a boost of confidence either.

I actually think that is a good question to consider.... not because you might not get in, but because life circumstances change. I will be bluntly honest, I have maxed out financially with a bachelors in biology. If I didn't get into vet school, if I ever wanted to increase what I made, I needed to go after a masters (or wait for a zoo director to retire/die.) I (and many of my friends) find the career limitations of a bachelors in bio frustrating.

 

[pyxystyx]

Soooo... I to tally wanted to laugh in this guy's face.

I'm at a meat science conference, representing my school, when an old alumni walks up and starts talking to me about how good the school was "in the old days", when he went, of course. (Tried droping some names, I personally didn't care...) The guy was older, obviously, turns out with a PhD.,... I definitely felt like he was, ahem, out to impress, so to speak.
In any case, he asks my major, then asks if I want to go to vet school, i say yes. He then asks my GPA (which i always find to be a little inpolite, personally), BUT, since I'm trying to be courteous of course I tell him. He then asks, (WITH an attitude)
"Where do you think you're going to get in to vet school with THAT kind of GPA?"

... I was almost TOO happy to tell him I'd already been accepted to one school, and was waiting to hear back from another interview. (also, now accepted from that one)

He then asked, still skeptical, " annd, how in the world did you do THAT?"

... I just gave him a nice little smirk.

 

[philomycus]

My dad told me I was worthless pretty much. He died last year. Too bad I don't get to tell him he was wrong.

 

[ShelterGirl]

An ex boyfriend. EX.

 

[DollyyLlama]

i've had some very discouraging work experiences, but the worst part was that i was fired from a job a year ago. i was devastated, wondered if i was fit for the field, would ever succeed at anything, etc. i'm pretty sure it was just one doctor there who had a problem with me (rather, my "attitude"); one of the other doctors wrote a LOR for me and a few of the techs told me specifically not to let it push me off my path. i was terrified some adcom would find out, or ask me about it during an interview. i didn't even want to bring it up on the forum (it's such a stigma). fortunately, i had kept my PT position at my current clinic, and they were very supportive. i still worry that i'll always have to justify it on future job apps and stuff.

the thought that got me through it, though, was imagining saying to that one doctor... "I WILL be a vet, maybe even a better one than you, because I WILL NOT treat anyone the way you treated me!"

(can i get an amen?)

 

[prevet09]

AMEN. one of the things i really like about the veterinary medicine career is that the people in it, REALLY want to be in it. despite these lame people telling us otherwise, despite a lower income, it is so encouraging to read these stories and to know that i will be surrounded by wonderful people who do what they ACTUALLy want to do, not just what their parents or society tell them to do. YAY to all of you guys!

 

[mochavet]

I don't know about you guys, but when someone tells me that I won't make it or that I can't do something, it just fuels me to prove them wrong. My undergrad adviser told me that I would never get into vet school based upon my ACT score. He made me so mad that I changed advisers and became determined to get into vet school. I had that same person as my physiology and anatomy professor and once I proved myself to him (ie. got an A in his course) I TAed his lab and he wrote me a LOR. I think he tells a lot of students that they won't get into vet school because he knows it will make them that much more determined to prove him wrong. I hated him for a long time for his comment but now I kind of respect him.

 

[Trilt]

Not anywhere near attending vet school, but right before beginning freshman year I unintentionally eavesdropped on my father saying something along the lines of, "She has all these big plans, but she'll probably fail out her first semester."

Long story short, I'm finishing up my second semester with close to a 4.0 and a mid-year invitation into my college's honors program, all while being heavily involved in extracurriculars. I have to admit I take a bit of sadistic joy in proving him wrong.

 

[TSUJC]

AMEN! I promised myself I would never be that jerk vet that made my employees feel like crap.

 

[rouxeny]

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