Deciding between med schools with a family

[Dr. wait for it...]

Hello all, I hope this is in the right place. I am just looking for advice from anyone in a similar situation. Now that the excitement of being accepted to a medical school has sunk in... I am getting nervous about picking the best place for me and my family. I realize that there is not any one here that can tell me what the right decision is for me but I would just like to hear about your experiences/opinions as I don't personally know anyone in a similar situation.

A little background:
We are from Utah
Married for 4+ years with two kids under 3 years.
My wife works as a hair stylist and occasionally does some teaching
Wife is very supportive and says she will move where ever we need to go. But talking with her she would slightly prefer to stay in-state.

So I was accepted to Rocky Vista Southern Utah. This would be great for the family to stay in Utah and be closer to extended family (her family in particular). Also staying in Utah means she doesn't need to get licensed in a new state (though i don't think that is very hard to do).

My question is how important has it been for your family to stay near in-laws or grandparents of your kids. Has anyone had a spouse that supported them and then once the excitement of moving somewhere new wore off ended up unhappy? I have had good interviews at 4 other schools that I should hear back from soon (KCU, DMU, LECOM, RVU-CO).

Southern Utah is a 4+ hour drive from home but our her family has a little get away home in St George so they visit frequently. We would have family around more there than we would in the next closest option.

Am I overplaying family support for her sake? Or should I go with what I felt was the best school? I don't feel that any of these schools hold tremendous prestige and may not give too much more of an advantage to the others. My main worry is that RVU is a new campus, I have heard great things from two friends who are at the colorado campus.

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[Darth Doc]

I don't have any family in the area of my school, but my children are older. There are a couple of guys in my class from Utah with young children and no close family support. Their wives bonded and supported each other.

In your shoes, though, it is hard on the spouse with small children. Family support will mean a lot to her. As long as your school is accredited, the experience you get will have a lot more to do with your ability to focus. You will be better able to focus if your wife and kids are supported and busy with other family members, especially exam weeks.

My recommendation is to stay close to family. That's what I would do. I chose my school based on how close we would be to my stepdaughter during her last few years of high school. I'm happy with my decision and my school is working out great for me too. Weigh all your options, but med school is hard on families. Do what you can to make things easier for your wife, because in the long run that will make things easier for you too. (IMHO)

 

[Go_Pokes_11]

It sounds to me like you have already made your decision. Relationships are give and take as I am sure you know, so in my eyes she is putting your dreams before herself and your family by supporting your decision to want to practice one of the most demanding professions there is, despite knowing it will take away time with them. From what I read, it does not seem like you have a burning desire to attend one of the other schools you have listed, so why not just attend RVU-Utah and give her the support of having her family close. Just my opinion here.

 

[futuremdforme]

I chose my school based on family reasons. It sounds like your wife is flexible if there's something AMAZING about one of the other schools. So if you got a full scholarship, that would be a driving feature. But with all DO schools, all in the same general level, I would stay close to family for your wife's sake. It will probably also benefit you a lot too!

 

[Dr. wait for it...]

@futuremdforme @Go_Pokes_11 @Darth Doc
Thank you all very much for your replies. You guys make very good points and kind of hit exactly what I was thinking. It is easy to get caught up in the whole "go to the best school you can" mentality but with especially with DO schools I think it is more of what you make of it. These other schools won't give me a huge advantage if I were to pick them. Thank you very much and I will post here again when my decision is made for sure, though I know I am definitely leaning towards RVU Utah.

 

[QofQuimica]

Agree with the others that once the decision becomes choosing between two accredited, American schools with all else essentially equal, then your wife's preferences regarding where to live should hold sway over just about any other consideration,* including BS premed assessments on SDN of which medical school is the "best."

*I'm assuming, of course, that staying married (and being in a happy marriage) matters to you. If it doesn't, then by all means, feel free to "do your own thing" without worrying about what she wants.

 

[harlowgrey]

I'm in utah also with this same issue. I haven't applied yet. But my husband will be pretty much a have a full time job onus take care of 80% of the time with the kids. We have 3. I keep going back and forth on location or not. We lived in St George for years. It's a great community for support. Plus activities to di ask the time for kids within the community. Are you wanting to specialize? One thing that I'm concerned about is during 3rd and 4th yr when you do clinical do you have to travel to other hospitals? Last time I knew the hospital want a teaching hospital. So I'm curious to know on 3rg and 4th year.

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[Dr. wait for it...]

I'm in utah also with this same issue. I haven't applied yet. But my husband will be pretty much a have a full time job onus take care of 80% of the time with the kids. We have 3. I keep going back and forth on location or not. We lived in St George for years. It's a great community for support. Plus activities to di ask the time for kids within the community. Are you wanting to specialize? One thing that I'm concerned about is during 3rd and 4th yr when you do clinical do you have to travel to other hospitals? Last time I knew the hospital want a teaching hospital. So I'm curious to know on 3rg and 4th year.

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So from what I understood they will have a few rotation sites in the st George area but not many. Most will be in Ogden/Provo. That is closer to home for us which is a plus. Although it would be nice to not have to move for the whole 4 years.

I am looking into pediatrics, EM, GI, neurology (I think all are doable as a DO) and ortho. From what I understand ortho might become more difficult to match as a DO after the merger. I don't feel like the other schools I have been accepted to (KCU and DMU) would give me much of an advantage to match in a residency I would like. An allopathic school might give me an advantage to match in something more competitive, and since I am unsure of what I would like to do I would like that. However I haven't heard anything from any allopathic schools so that decision might not be a problem.

Overall I have heard some great things about RVU. I have two friends at the Colorado campus and both really enjoy it so far. I think the Utah campus will be very similar and I would be more than happy to attend. After I interviewed and found out it was fully acreditted this school jumped to my top three on my DO list. I have been fortunate to be accepted to all three of those and will likely pick southern Utah.

Sorry for the long post...

 

[harlowgrey]

That won't be to bad in ogden and provo. To bad not at u of u. I'm really hoping I can get into u of u. But it's hard to get into from what I have heard.

I want t specialize in peds em, neurology, or general surgeon all in peds. I'm just nervous being a DO it'll be hard to match. That's my fear. Haha.

I think if I can't get into UofU then RVU will be second choice. Hopefully it won't be so hard to get into when I apply in 2 years.

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[Dr. wait for it...]

That won't be to bad in ogden and provo. To bad not at u of u. I'm really hoping I can get into u of u. But it's hard to get into from what I have heard.

I want t specialize in peds em, neurology, or general surgeon all in peds. I'm just nervous being a DO it'll be hard to match. That's my fear. Haha.

I think if I can't get into UofU then RVU will be second choice. Hopefully it won't be so hard to get into when I apply in 2 years.

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If you are from Utah then U of U is easier to get into than any other allopathic school, in my opinion. The problem is any med school is hard to get into. you do have the advantage of seeing the matches with the merger before you apply so you can see how "hard" it might be to get into your wanted specialty.

 

[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

So from what I understood they will have a few rotation sites in the st George area but not many. Most will be in Ogden/Provo. That is closer to home for us which is a plus. Although it would be nice to not have to move for the whole 4 years.

I am looking into pediatrics, EM, GI, neurology (I think all are doable as a DO) and ortho. From what I understand ortho might become more difficult to match as a DO after the merger. I don't feel like the other schools I have been accepted to (KCU and DMU) would give me much of an advantage to match in a residency I would like. An allopathic school might give me an advantage to match in something more competitive, and since I am unsure of what I would like to do I would like that. However I haven't heard anything from any allopathic schools so that decision might not be a problem.

Overall I have heard some great things about RVU. I have two friends at the Colorado campus and both really enjoy it so far. I think the Utah campus will be very similar and I would be more than happy to attend. After I interviewed and found out it was fully acreditted this school jumped to my top three on my DO list. I have been fortunate to be accepted to all three of those and will likely pick southern Utah.

Sorry for the long post...

Peds and neuro are definitely doable. EM is I think a little more difficult, but doable if you have the scores/grades/SLORs. GI is a fellowship of IM, so you have to match into IM (easy) and then match into a GI fellowship towards the end of residency (less easy). Ortho is very competitive for MDs and DOs alike.