Deep Thoughts...feel free to contribute

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HippocratesX

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'Always remember,when u get where you're going....

....there u are.'

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"Be careful who you pretend to be... because you are who you pretend to be." -Kurt Vonnegut
 
If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.

--Jack Handey
 
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All things being equal, fat people use more soap.
 
baseball wrong...man with 4 balls cannot walk
 
Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean ? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.
 
My grandmother's brain was dead, but her heart was still beating. It was the first time we ever had a republican in the family.
 
Religion:

I was in San Fransisco once, walking along the Golden Gate Bridge, and I saw this guy on the bridge about to jump. So I thought I'd try to stall and detain him, long enough for me to put the film in. I said, "Don't jump!" and he turns... You've heard of the elephant man. He was kind of like that, he had a, well, you could say he had the head of a horse. And my heart went out to him. I said, "Why the long face?"
He said, "'Cause all my life people have called me mean names like horses-head or Flicka or chess-piece or Trigger..."
I said, "Well, don't worry about it, Ed. It can't be that bad."
He said, "My girlfriend's suing me!"
I said, "For palomino?"
He said, "Why was I put on this Earth?"
I said, "My friend, anywhere else you wouldn't stand a chance."
He said, "Nobody loves me."
I said, "God loves you, you silly ninny."
He said, "How do you know there's a God?"
I said, "Of course there's a God. Do you think that billions of years ago a bunch of molecules floating around at random could someday have had the sense of humor to make you look like that?"
He said, "I do believe in God."
I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?"
He said, "A Christian."
I said, "Me too. Protestant or Catholic?"
He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me too! What franchise?"
He says, "Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?"
He says, "Northern Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He says, "Northern Conservative Baptist."
I say, "Me too! Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist or Northern Conservative Reform Baptist?"
He says, "Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist."
I say, "Me too! Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region or Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Eastern Region?"
He says, "Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region."
I say, "Me too! Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879 or Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?"
He says, "Northern Conservative Fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912."
I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over!
 
I cracked up when I heard these...

"If you have nothing nice to say, say something really nasty." <img border="0" alt="[Laughy]" title="" src="graemlins/laughy.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Laughy]" title="" src="graemlins/laughy.gif" /> :D

"Don't put off today what you could put off tomorrow or the next day." <img border="0" alt="[Laughy]" title="" src="graemlins/laughy.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Laughy]" title="" src="graemlins/laughy.gif" />
 
outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.--mark twain.
 
". . . a wise man once told me, don't argue with fools, 'cause people from a distance won't know who's who . . ."

Jay-Z
 
I once heard a short, green guy, with big pointy ears say something like...

"Fear is the path to the dark-side."

Hmmm. I wonder what he meant.
 
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There is a theory which states that if anyone were to discover exactly what the Universe is here for or what it is, it will instantly dissapear and be replace with something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory that this has already happened.
 
"Assume makes an ass out of u and me"
 
The only way to make yourself look good is to make someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people look good. - Homer Simpson
 
Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids!

Jeff
 
medschool booyah
 
[ Sternrower wrote: "Assume makes an ass out of u and me"]

Sternrower, how bout this one instead:

Your Assumption makes an "ass" out of "u" and "umption" :D
 
•••quote:•••Originally posted by hannacanna:
•outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.--mark twain.•••••I think this quote is by Groucho Marx, not Mark Twain. Speaking of Groucho...

"I don't care to belong to a [med school] that accepts people like me as [students]. "
 
Don't sweat petty things....or pet sweaty things.
 
my bad, wolferman... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="frown.gif" />
 
"the heart has reasons that reason doesn't know"--Pascal

"understanding the problem is 50% of the solution"--Einstein
 
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