Diversity Essay Topic

[929826]

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Trying to decide which is better:

-I attended a language immersion school for most of my primary education. My teachers were from other countries, and many of our Teaching assistants (also from other countries) lived with my family. I traveled extensively as a child to countries where this language is spoken. I speak various languages, which I have used in my clinical and volunteer work.

-I do extensive work with victims of violence, particularly in correctional facilities. This experience has taught me a lot of empathy towards people in these situations, and about the challenges they face

Thoughts?

Edit: FYI there is no mention of #1 anywhere else in my app. #2 is talked about in activities.

 

[929826]

@Goro Would love your honest opinion on this.

 

[Goro]

Trying to decide which is better:

-I attended a language immersion school for most of my primary education. My teachers were from other countries, and many of our Teaching assistants (also from other countries) lived with my family. I traveled extensively as a child to countries where this language is spoken. I speak various languages, which I have used in my clinical and volunteer work.

-I do extensive work with victims of violence, particularly in correctional facilities. This experience has taught me a lot of empathy towards people in these situations, and about the challenges they face

Thoughts?

Edit: FYI there is no mention of #1 anywhere else in my app. #2 is talked about in activities.

Both are great. If you go with #1 only, be sure to mention the bolded. It's one thing to speak a number of languages, but to be able to apply that gift, that's great.