EMD's with families?

[Ace5813]

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Hi there. It's been a while since I have posted, hope all is going well with everyone. I am wondering about those of you with families. Is it hard to be married and have kids (one or the other or both) while working in emergency medicine? I immagine it must be quite difficult with all the hours that most of you work. Just looking for some input, thanks!

 

[spyderdoc]

Hi there. It's been a while since I have posted, hope all is going well with everyone. I am wondering about those of you with families. Is it hard to be married and have kids (one or the other or both) while working in emergency medicine? I immagine it must be quite difficult with all the hours that most of you work. Just looking for some input, thanks!

Actually for me it is great. My wife is a pediatric hospitalist with a week off every 3 weeks, so my schedulers coordinate my schedule pretty well with my wife's so that we can spend most of our days off together...
So, no complaints here...

 

[roja]

I have a 4 year old. Works fine for me.. I know my scedule. when I'm off, I'm off. No pager, nothing.. its great. EM is actually a great field (if you like it) to have a family with....

 

[Seaglass]

No complaints so far here. I see way more of my family than friends in other fields are seeing of theirs.

 

[DrQuinn]

As you can see from the above posts, EM is good for family life. Even as a resident, your schedule isn't too bad. You may be doing some tough off-service rotations every once in a while (ie 2-3 months the first year) but they are managable. Most of the time you're in the ED and know your schedule, I can assume you would be able to coordinate things as need be.

My cat and dog are fine.
Q

 

[UnskinnyBop]

I'm just a lowly MS1-to-be, but I have to say that my dad is an ER doctor and the lifestyle really didn't allow him to spend much time with me when I was a kid. Yeah, there are benefits to shift work, but there are downsides as well. Since the hours are so random and long, you will probably spend a lot of time sleeping. In fact, my dad can usually be found working or sleeping during the four days a week he works, so I never see him then. Then there's the fact that the ER is open all the time- like Christmas, Thanksgiving, your birthday, etc. My dad missed my college graduation, high school graduation, birthday, Christmas like every other year... all that stuff. Then there are the times when he was supposed to be home, but got tied up in some trauma and would be waaaay late since it's not the kind of thing where you can just get up and leave. I understand things better now, but when I was a kid I sure was pissed at him. Not that I don't think it's a good idea to go into EM if you have kids, but just some considerations that I haven't seen expressed here. Good luck!

 

[Scrubbs]

Yes, the ER never closes and you will always have to work SOME holidays, but you also have a lot of free time that other docs won't. Our attending group has a system where if you work x-mas one year, you're off for the next four. Not too shabby, IMHO. And of course, there are always people who are willing to work b/c they don't celebrate that holiday (I volunteer for x-mas every year - good jew that I am 🙂).

I know some IM and FP attendings who have office hours 6 days a week with night hours 2-3 days/wk. Most days they are working 10-12 hours without taking call into consideration. Sounds like a lot less time with your family than EM, but that's just my take.

 

[Apollyon]

If your dad couldn't get your birthday or college graduation off, his group is either too small, screwing him, or he didn't ask for those days.

 

[roja]

If your dad couldn't get your birthday or college graduation off, his group is either too small, screwing him, or he didn't ask for those days.

I was kind of thinking the same thing... or maybe he had financial reasons for working so much.... 4 shifts a week? 😱

that's waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to many... or most probably they didn't have enough coverage...

 

[UnskinnyBop]

My birthday- the whole family was supposed to meet a restaurant an hour after my dad got off from work... only a big trauma came in and he wound up missing the entire thing. So he was supposed to be off, but didn't end up making it.

College graduation- they only get to request three days off a month, which has to be done way advance. So my graduation was supposed to be on a Friday. Due to rain and flooding that day, however, it got pushed back until the next day, which was NOT one of the days my dad had off. It was one of those things where no one would trade shifts with him, either. So, he missed my graduation, too.

The four days a week is pretty standard for the hospital where he works, and they have about ten or so other ER doctors there. It's a big urban trauma center, though, so they usually have quite a few doctors on-shift at a time. Again, I just thought I'd bring up these concerns from my perspective growing up with an EMD for a parent. I wasn't mad at all about my birthday or graduation- I understand how these things are now. In fact, I'm starting med school next year, so obviously I'm not scarred for life! 🙂

I guess perhaps my case is different because my dad is very into his work and just really loves the ER. He always stays late when big cases come in, he loves working four shifts a week... he's just like that. Work is far more important to him than the family. I'm sure not every ER doctor is like that.

So yeah, all I'm trying to say is that ER definitely has some unique time things that used to bother me when I was growing up, is all. 🙂

 

[roja]

I guess perhaps my case is different because my dad is very into his work and just really loves the ER. He always stays late when big cases come in, he loves working four shifts a week... he's just like that. Work is far more important to him than the family. I'm sure not every ER doctor is like that.

So yeah, all I'm trying to say is that ER definitely has some unique time things that used to bother me when I was growing up, is all. 🙂

As you said yourself, this was a decision your father made. There are definately people who work a ton by CHOICE. However, your father's experience is definately NOT the norm.

I would have been bothered as well, but not because of the nature of EM, but the choices made. (don't worry, my dad's a surgeon, been there done that)

but EM is a great field to go into if you have a family...I rarely, even as a resident, stay past my shift, adn AT MOST, it has been an hour. And as a PGY-2, I am only working 16-17 shifts a month... almost the same as your dad. I have no intention of working this much as an attending.

 

[Hidalgo]

The opportunity to balance family and medicine is one of the things that I love about emergency medicine. I finished residency with 3 kids, and have never felt that I've had to sacrifice my family because my job is too demanding. I currently work 15-16 shifts a month, but I am fresh out of residency and trying to pay off some loans. The majority of docs in my group work no more than 12. Shift work can be demanding, but it also allows you to plan your life and know in advance when you'll be home and when you'll be working. Compared to most fields of medicine, EM offers a pretty good life.