Envisioning your future personal/family/social life as a doctor

[tumtum]

I'm only a freshman in my undergrad year of college, but I am seriously interested in going to med school (probably to become a surgeon). I'm already quite familiar with the pros and cons of being a doctor, the length of the process, the amount of dedication and sacrifice it takes, etc. But the only thing that might stop me from becoming a surgeon is how my future personal/family/social life will be affected. Especially for women, people have told me that having kids and maintaining a "normal" family life is extremely difficult because surgeons are always on call, work overnight shifts, etc.

So my question to all of you is: what kind of family life do you imagine yourself having as a doctor?

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[Bacchus]

 

[Katatonic]

A fairly normal one.

 

[stooges287]

Lol nice, Bacchus. Also, if you want real information on what family life as a physician is like, I wouldn't be asking the question in this forum. I'd take a look over at the residents/attendings forum. I'll just assume you find out about other peoples outlooks however...

 

[HumidBeing]

I don't really try to envision family life. It's not something that I'm ready to think about. I suppose that if I live in a city, I'll live in a small apartment either within walking distance, or with public transportation available to shopping, and concerts and other entertainment. In my time off, I'd like to jump on a plane and go visit places that I haven't been to before.

If I live outside of a city area, I'll probably still live in an apartment until I save enough to pay for a small house with enough land to have a vegetable garden, flower gardens, fruit trees, and at least some chickens.

I'm not ready to picture myself with a family. I'd like to experience more before I even start thinking about that.

 

[Law2Doc]

Especially for women, people have told me that having kids and maintaining a "normal" family life is extremely difficult because surgeons are always on call, work overnight shifts, etc.

So my question to all of you is: what kind of family life do you imagine yourself having as a doctor?

The female surgeons I know work a ton (>80 hrs/week), and then do their best to balance the remaining couple of hours a day between family/kids and sleep. It's a very hard life, timewise. You either are going to need a stay at home spouse or full time nanny care. But people do it. When you get to med school, it is imperative to find yourself a female mentor in your specialty of interest, who can give you some reasonable insight into what your life might be like. But yeah, surgery is probably the least forgiving field in terms of your family life. You cannot dabble -- you are either all in, or you are out.

 

[Nikhil72]

again, I think it has already been said on this forum that once you're out of residency, you can find a job that works around your needs in some form. My parents are both doctors (an internist and a radiologist) and they managed to provide me and my sister a very hands-on family structure throughout my life...we had a babysitter until 6:30ish every day after school and then they took the reigns over for the evening as is generally true with any professional parent. True, certain specialties may not allow that kind of life, but it all depends on what you prioritize. I personally hope to emulate my own experience as best I can.

 

[8744]

I'm only a freshman in my undergrad year of college, but I am seriously interested in going to med school (probably to become a surgeon). I'm already quite familiar with the pros and cons of being a doctor, the length of the process, the amount of dedication and sacrifice it takes, etc. But the only thing that might stop me from becoming a surgeon is how my future personal/family/social life will be affected. Especially for women, people have told me that having kids and maintaining a "normal" family life is extremely difficult because surgeons are always on call, work overnight shifts, etc.

So my question to all of you is: what kind of family life do you imagine yourself having as a doctor?

A surgical residency will destroy your marriage, poison your relationship with your children, and leave you, in your early thirties, older, sadder, much wiser, and with the feeling that, while you may love surgery, maybe it wasn't really worth it.

I'm just an Emergency Medicine resident in a relatively easy residency compared to surgery (although we work stranger hours) and it has had a very strong negative effect on me, my marriage, and my family. I hope it gets better after residency but you know....it might not.

 

[funkydrmonkey]

I imagine it will be something like Grey's Anatomy, if you work in a hospital, or it will be like Private Practice, if you well have a private practice.