Help me calm my fears about starting medical school older

numbersloth

2+ Year Member
Mar 26, 2015
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156
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Pre-Health (Field Undecided), Pre-Medical
I recently was accepted to a career changer post-bac. I'm very passionate about medicine and science and dream of being a physician, at least most days. The one thing holding me back is that I am terrified that because of being older and attending medical school I will never find a partner or have the opportunity to have children. This may sound silly but having a family has always been a goal of mine. Anyone have any anecdotes they can share to ease these fears?
 
Aug 21, 2019
105
174
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Medical Student
I recently was accepted to a career changer post-bac. I'm very passionate about medicine and science and dream of being a physician, at least most days. The one thing holding me back is that I am terrified that because of being older and attending medical school I will never find a partner or have the opportunity to have children. This may sound silly but having a family has always been a goal of mine. Anyone have any anecdotes they can share to ease these fears?
How old are you? Male or female? Just asking because sometimes we get non-trads worrying about this and they’re 25, which is still plenty of time for everything. If you’re 40 and just getting started, you can still have a family, but it might be more difficult logistically.
 
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numbersloth

2+ Year Member
Mar 26, 2015
428
156
Status
Pre-Health (Field Undecided), Pre-Medical
Plenty of people start med school with families. Plenty start families in med school. Plenty start them in residency. Life doesn’t have to come to a stand still.
Thank you for this! I think my biggest worry is finding an SO given that I'll be moving for my post-bac, moving for a gap year, moving again for med school, and then likely moving again for residency, and then hopefully moving back to my hometown to practice at which point I'll be on the older side, especially to have kids (which freaks me out bc I don't think most guys want to have kids like 6 months after meeting someone haha). I probably sound a bit dramatic but I find that hearing from other people who have been through this process that they found someone and had a family and it all ended up ok makes me feel a bit less stressed.
 
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Oct 19, 2018
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Like Ian Malcom said in Jurassic Park, "Life finds a way." Nobody knows when, where or how they'll meet their SO (unless you come from a culture of arranged marriages). Tinder, etc should still be readily accessible for you. It will just be a little harder in terms of finding the time, but being an adult kind of sucks anyhow. But people have families in, and during med school, residency, etc. Not easy, but in truth I found those students to be more stable.
 
Jun 27, 2018
377
487
Status
Pre-Medical
Thank you for this! I think my biggest worry is finding an SO given that I'll be moving for my post-bac, moving for a gap year, moving again for med school, and then likely moving again for residency, and then hopefully moving back to my hometown to practice at which point I'll be on the older side, especially to have kids (which freaks me out bc I don't think most guys want to have kids like 6 months after meeting someone haha). I probably sound a bit dramatic but I find that hearing from other people who have been through this process that they found someone and had a family and it all ended up ok makes me feel a bit less stressed.
Life is weird, homie. You never know. I wasn’t looking to actively date, let alone marry someone, until my future spouse walked into my store 7 years ago. It’s normal to think these things. Don’t beat yourself up so much
 
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Goro

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7+ Year Member
Jun 10, 2010
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Somewhere west of St. Louis
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Non-Student
I recently was accepted to a career changer post-bac. I'm very passionate about medicine and science and dream of being a physician, at least most days. The one thing holding me back is that I am terrified that because of being older and attending medical school I will never find a partner or have the opportunity to have children. This may sound silly but having a family has always been a goal of mine. Anyone have any anecdotes they can share to ease these fears?
Some of my all-time best students have been in their 30s and 40s. I graduated a stellar one at age of 50. She is now an attending in Southern California.
 
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