Help - My LOR writer asked me to write my own LOR

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wannagotoFlorida!!

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The program director for an org with whom i started an art therapy program for is one of my letter writers. She's not affiliated with my University at all.

I reached out to her asking to be my LOR writer as the program has been one of my most rewarding and meaningful experiences. Her and I have a very close relationship and i've known her for a little over 3 years now & worked very closely together.

When I asked her, she said I could write my own and that she would go over it at the end and sign off. Honestly, if i HAD to i would write it, but its not ideal. I feel very weird talking about myself/praising myself in someone else's point of view, not to mention, I don't know if this is the right thing to do.

My questions:
1) Is this morally correct?
2) If so, how the heck do I write my own strong LOR.

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Morally correct is something only you can decide for yourself. But it's pretty common for letter writers to do this. Maybe they're busy, lazy, or not sure how to write it. You need to find peace with whatever you choose to do.

Writing your own feels uncomfortable. Have a coworker write a draft and tell your letter writer that someone else wrote it. Maybe they'll use it as a template or submit in its entirety, but make sure you are comfortable either way.
 
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Many people ask applicants to do this. It is not to say that the person will sign it without reading and revising it.

There is a formula to these things. AMCAS also has a handout for letter writers that will give you some tips.

first paragraph: how and when you met, the context in which you've known each other and how that might have changed over time, if applicable (e.g. you were a student and then a TA and then a lab manager).

second paragraph: what this person has observed you doing and specific skills you've learned or demonstrated.

third paragraph: soft skills, people skills, personality traits, interpersonal skills.

fourth paragraph: what this person has observed about your interest in medicine or how your interests have changed over time to the point where you are applying for medical school.

final paragraph: that you are a strong applicant, one of the strongest, the very best ever seen in x years of experience. Or you have specific characteristics, listed, that point toward your success in medica school and as a physician. Sometimes a statement that the writer would trust you with the care of their own family. If you don't feel comfortable writing these things about yourself you could close with, "wannagotoflorida! has all the characteristics of a successful medical student and is well positioned to become an outstanding clinician-teacher-investigator-advocate and will be an asset at whatever medical school is lucky enough to land her/him."
 
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Many people ask applicants to do this. It is not to say that the person will sign it without reading and revising it.

There is a formula to these things. AMCAS also has a handout for letter writers that will give you some tips.

first paragraph: how and when you met, the context in which you've known each other and how that might have changed over time, if applicable (e.g. you were a student and then a TA and then a lab manager).

second paragraph: what this person has observed you doing and specific skills you've learned or demonstrated.

third paragraph: soft skills, people skills, personality traits, interpersonal skills.

fourth paragraph: what this person has observed about your interest in medicine or how your interests have changed over time to the point where you are applying for medical school.

final paragraph: that you are a strong applicant, one of the strongest, the very best ever seen in x years of experience. Or you have specific characteristics, listed, that point toward your success in medica school and as a physician. Sometimes a statement that the writer would trust you with the care of their own family. If you don't feel comfortable writing these things about yourself you could close with, "wannagotoflorida! has all the characteristics of a successful medical student and is well positioned to become an outstanding clinician-teacher-investigator-advocate and will be an asset at whatever medical school is lucky enough to land her/him."

Thank you! Will do that. Do you know if there any good sites for sample rec letters from non-professors?
 
Morally correct is something only you can decide for yourself. But it's pretty common for letter writers to do this. Maybe they're busy, lazy, or not sure how to write it. You need to find peace with whatever you choose to do.

Writing your own feels uncomfortable. Have a coworker write a draft and tell your letter writer that someone else wrote it. Maybe they'll use it as a template or submit in its entirety, but make sure you are comfortable either way.

Hmm thats a good idea. Thank you!
 
Thank you! Will do that. Do you know if there any good sites for sample rec letters from non-professors?

I don't know of any samples from non-professors but the formula is the same:
how you know each other and for how long (e.g. you have been a volunteer at XYZ where the writer is the executive director and you've been collaborating together since 201_.)
What you do for the organization or skills you've demonstrated (developed training program for new volunteers)
Your soft skills (always willing to help others, the social glue among volunteers who always remembers other birthdays, etc)
Statement about how your interests evolved over time... let's say you have been volunteering with kids and the writer thinks you'd be great as a teacher or social worker but you've made a decision to go into medicine and perhaps pediatrics
Statement about how you are a good, very good, the best, etc and a good fit for medical school.
 
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I don't know of any samples from non-professors but the formula is the same:
how you know each other and for how long (e.g. you have been a volunteer at XYZ where the writer is the executive director and you've been collaborating together since 201_.)
What you do for the organization or skills you've demonstrated (developed training program for new volunteers)
Your soft skills (always willing to help others, the social glue among volunteers who always remembers other birthdays, etc)
Statement about how your interests evolved over time... let's say you have been volunteering with kids and the writer thinks you'd be great as a teacher or social worker but you've made a decision to go into medicine and perhaps pediatrics
Statement about how you are a good, very good, the best, etc and a good fit for medical school.

Thanks for the help as always @LizzyM!!
 
If you do a search for “how to write a letter of recommendation for medical school” you will find some examples. They all follow the format that LizzyM has described.
 
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agree with LizzyM. i had to do this on a number of instances (i hate it). Fortunately, some of those that I had asked to write the letter gave me feedback on it. In general, I followed an outline like what LizzyM had suggested with "how do I know this person/for how long" followed by a competence/work ethic paragraph (based on your interaction with them, then a personability paragraph, then a conclusion. One of the recurring things I was suggested was (1) don't re-write your resume (2) what med schools want to know is that you're a good human, easy to work with, and are capable. Hope this helps.
 
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agree with LizzyM. i had to do this on a number of instances (i hate it). Fortunately, some of those that I had asked to write the letter gave me feedback on it. In general, I followed an outline like what LizzyM had suggested with "how do I know this person/for how long" followed by a competence/work ethic paragraph (based on your interaction with them, then a personability paragraph, then a conclusion. One of the recurring things I was suggested was (1) don't re-write your resume (2) what med schools want to know is that you're a good human, easy to work with, and are capable. Hope this helps.

I guess i was worried because I looked up templates to follow, but then thought it would be "too basic"
Then, i felt weird making it stronger because i was worried it would be "too strong" hahah
But yeah, going to use the templates LizzyM suggested as well.
Thank you!!
 
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