Sure, you could spend your time befriending all the high-achievers in your class on the off chance that one of them will one day be in a position to help you (maybe)...but the better use of your time is certainly to do extra studying to achieve in objective, quantifiable ways such as class rank and board scores. Those matter a hell of a lot more in the end.
@Foot Fetish, you've asked this forum a lot of questions. (I checked. Every thread you've started has ended with a question mark.) And each and every time people have generously and kindly responded. What do you think is going on? Isn't that being friendly? Now imagine that you have questions nobody but the people who really know you could answer. What are you going to do then? And this goes way beyond which attending likes what or how to present a case. What about questions like... I bombed Step 1; am I still worth something? My wife left me; will anyone ever love me again? My dad died; was he proud of me? I'm feeling lonely; will you stop by and say hello?
Respectfully, most people are getting it wrong in this thread. You should never treat people as
instruments to some other goal.
Never. That's awful and often where people stumble when it comes to "networking." You treat people as people and let your authenticity flow. 80% of the time--if you fake who you are--you'll either come across as odd or a jerk or kinda imemorable and 100% of the time it will be an exhausting spectacle on your part. Why? Because it's a kind of manipulation. And in the process of manipulating others, you close yourself off from
meaningful connection. If who you are is somebody that grinds through a million Anki cards and nevermind others--godspeed. But is that somebody who
you are happy
being? Is that somebody that
others are happy being
around? Maybe. I'm in no position to judge.
There are certainly lots of ways through life. You'll find what works for you, or you'll be miserable. Maybe my version of a fulfilling life is very different from yours. That's okay and nobody should tell you otherwise.
But. Lots of residents, attendings, and MS4s in this thread are indeed telling you otherwise.
Maybe they have
perspective that you don't have yet. (And yes, I actually laughed a little reading you tell actual doctors about how referrals work. You frankly have zero clue as a MS0. Generally speaking: available, affable, and able--in that order.)
That doesn't mean you shouldn't study hard or devote yourself to your vocation--everybody should--but, without others in your life, you're setting yourself up for a lot loneliness and misery. Just look at the General Residency forum at how many "lonely" or "divorced" threads there are. Lots of lonely people in the world, even the "successful" doctors. Meaningful connection is what matters in the end. If you were going to die tomorrow, what do you wish you had gotten out of life?
I know all of this sounds very woo woo. But it comes from personal experience. It's no secret that I was in a car accident with my partner. We both almost died. I also got a 252 on Step 1 and honoured every rotation thus far with publications yadda yadda yadda. In the end, when it really mattered, I'd take my friends and family
over anything else. When I thought I was going to die, do you really think I
also thought about my Step 1 score? Or what kind of residency I
might get? No. I wished I had hugged my mom the last time I visited or called my best friend or that my partner was still alive. And when they all of them showed up at the bedside to say they loved me... Well. That was the best feeling I've ever felt in my entire life--certainly better than getting my Step 1 result or whatever.
Anyways. You'll probably be an outrageously successful medical student. I'm just worried that you'll also be a very lonely one. I wish you the best of luck.
