- Joined
- May 18, 2013
- Messages
- 26
- Reaction score
- 42
The title says it all. For background, I am an MS2 at a mid-tier M.D. school who is doing above average academically. I am also involved here and there in clubs/organizations and am even a "leader" in a few, while doing small amounts of clinical research on the side (unknown if will result in pubs though--at least a poster I am hoping). I feel more below average in the category outside of academics, however. I am more Type B than Type A. My interest is only psychiatry.
I am asking this because, when I started medical school, I thought and expected that life would become much more of a genuine pursuit for me and my peers and less about just beefing up CVs (unlike being a pre-med). Part of me thought "Alright, we're in, let's put the past tendencies and behaviors behind us, lets get through the tough academic and clinical stuff, do some outside of school stuff, become doctors and get into residency without needing to be too fearful of the future since medicine is oh so secure!"
Instead, my balloon has exponentially been popping since I started medical school, as I see my fellow medical school classmates become members and leaders of any organization/club they can get ahold of, starting as many clubs/organizations as possible. Many of my classmates are focused on being the best. It shows in that many of them started studying for Step 1 during MS1. There's quite a bit of false altruism for one's peers as well from what I can see. Much of what transpires amongst my community feels done out of insecurity and fear while ultimately being focused on one's own gain. There's always the genuine ones, of course, but I am blown away by this more self-centered and insecure mentality that many medical students seem to be increasingly taking towards their education and career--which leads to an obsessive and neurotic approach to opportunities, involvements, academics, research, etc. It's also contagious, because it makes me think I am doing something wrong perhaps! Part of me wants to believe that living this way isn't how it has to be.
I started medical school super chill and was glad to be done (or so I thought) with the facades and pretenses that being a pre-med so often entails, but have slowly found myself becoming tempted to regress and catch this infectious desperation that I am detecting in the medical community (at least the one I am in). I wanted nothing more than to just finally do what I really liked and loved and not too much else that fell outside of that category.
I have scoured the NRMP, and I was also surprised in the statistics reported, not just for STEP 1, but for research and work and volunteer as well.
Many, especially the Rad Onc., Ortho., Optho. and Derm. hopefuls, will say "Oh, your interest is psychiatry? It's not competitive! Look what I and others have to do, so stop talking." Nevertheless, I am hoping to be taken seriously, as I am still feeling intimidated and insecure, wondering if I am doing something wrong. Medical school is filled with Type A's, and I feel like I have too much Type B in me at times. Being Type A is painful and exhausting to me. The future seems very hard to predict, and things don't seem very clear.
Shall we talk about medical school culture and also try to clarify what medical students should and should not be doing? Is anyone else experiencing what I am talking about in their respective medical community? Whatever you read that you felt struck by, positively or negatively, feel free to respond.
I am asking this because, when I started medical school, I thought and expected that life would become much more of a genuine pursuit for me and my peers and less about just beefing up CVs (unlike being a pre-med). Part of me thought "Alright, we're in, let's put the past tendencies and behaviors behind us, lets get through the tough academic and clinical stuff, do some outside of school stuff, become doctors and get into residency without needing to be too fearful of the future since medicine is oh so secure!"
Instead, my balloon has exponentially been popping since I started medical school, as I see my fellow medical school classmates become members and leaders of any organization/club they can get ahold of, starting as many clubs/organizations as possible. Many of my classmates are focused on being the best. It shows in that many of them started studying for Step 1 during MS1. There's quite a bit of false altruism for one's peers as well from what I can see. Much of what transpires amongst my community feels done out of insecurity and fear while ultimately being focused on one's own gain. There's always the genuine ones, of course, but I am blown away by this more self-centered and insecure mentality that many medical students seem to be increasingly taking towards their education and career--which leads to an obsessive and neurotic approach to opportunities, involvements, academics, research, etc. It's also contagious, because it makes me think I am doing something wrong perhaps! Part of me wants to believe that living this way isn't how it has to be.
I started medical school super chill and was glad to be done (or so I thought) with the facades and pretenses that being a pre-med so often entails, but have slowly found myself becoming tempted to regress and catch this infectious desperation that I am detecting in the medical community (at least the one I am in). I wanted nothing more than to just finally do what I really liked and loved and not too much else that fell outside of that category.
I have scoured the NRMP, and I was also surprised in the statistics reported, not just for STEP 1, but for research and work and volunteer as well.
Many, especially the Rad Onc., Ortho., Optho. and Derm. hopefuls, will say "Oh, your interest is psychiatry? It's not competitive! Look what I and others have to do, so stop talking." Nevertheless, I am hoping to be taken seriously, as I am still feeling intimidated and insecure, wondering if I am doing something wrong. Medical school is filled with Type A's, and I feel like I have too much Type B in me at times. Being Type A is painful and exhausting to me. The future seems very hard to predict, and things don't seem very clear.
Shall we talk about medical school culture and also try to clarify what medical students should and should not be doing? Is anyone else experiencing what I am talking about in their respective medical community? Whatever you read that you felt struck by, positively or negatively, feel free to respond.