fre****y said:
if you aren't willing to entertain that she may have had as hard a week as you (aside from just brushing polich on toes, as you put it), than you have absolutely no business introducing the argument that you had a hard week doing clinical stuff.
your logic is flawed. THAT'S why you can't get this out of your mind. you're trying to build an argument for why the tipping thing was wrong based on these messed up assumptions you have about things outside of the situation
Whoa whoa whoa... I must have done a poor job expressing myself, or else you're simply misunderstanding me. So I'll try to be more direct this time. (Why is it important for me to be understood? It's human nature, or at least mine...)
1. The lady was a b*tch, plain and simple. It wasn't a communication issue, it was an example of horrendous customer service. She asked for a tip outright and caught me off guard (the credit card slip DID have an amount for me to fill in). I cited an amount. She balked at that amount and made me feel like a cheap jerk, even though my offer was quite reasonable. I was not rude to her in return, I said nothing.
2. I'm NOT making an argument about me deserving good service because I had a hard work week, and I'm not making assumptions about whether or not HER week was hard. Regardless of how hard her week might have been, she should never treat a customer that way. And no matter how hard MY week was, I have no right to be a jerk to her. I didn't. I don't pick fights, it's not in my nature.
3. The situation irked me for two reasons: 1) horrible customer service 2) greed and the payment system in general. Just as you said (and just as I said in an earlier post), there is an advertised set cost for a service and an optional tip. People always expect a tip because it's the convention, but theoretically it's supposed to be based on good service. The nail lady provided good service, and I was intending to tip her. I did tip her reasonably, and she treated me like garbage and suggested I should have given her more. She EXPECTED me to have given her more. My argument is, that if she had a price in her mind that she wanted to receive for the service (say, $50) she should CHARGE that amount, and then be grateful if someone tips her extra. But to only charge $30, say, and act like an a$$hole if your customer doesn't tip you $20 is completely asinine.
Let's say I become a doctor (and tipping the doctor is the convention) and I advertise that I will perform a routine physical for $100. The patient agrees to pay this price, I provide the service, and at the end of the treatment I rudely say: "How much are you going to tip me?" The customer is pleased with the service and replies: $20. I balk at him and say: "Only $20? You cheap ****." This is acceptable?? No, of course not. I think she behaved greedily, and my MENTAL comment "Get a REAL job" was aimed at this idea: if someone wants to make big bucks, get a job that pays big bucks! Don't simply screw people over. People tend to overvalue their contributions; they think that they DESERVE something even if in reality they didn't put in the necessary work. The NAIL LADY is arrogant.
4. Okay, so I think the whole pedicure situation is clear enough-- I've beat it into the ground.
She was a jerk, right? So, bringing this asinine example around to my primary point of the original post (in other words, trying to make today's frustration a valid topic for a pre-medical forum)...
5. My point in bringing up the arrogance bit and the fact that I had a challenging week (as usual) was to entertain the notion that my own stress and PERCEPTIONS of others' stress in some ways affects my thoughts (not my actions-- once again, I didn't behave rudely or arrogantly to the lady). I think this is a fair and honest idea and I was interested to see if anyone else felt the same way and would be fair and honest in admitting it.
I'm going to go out on an arrogant limb and reiterate my point-- I perceive that my work (current and future) in the medical field is more stressful, taxing, and has required more sacrifice than the nail lady's work. While I don't believe that my intrinsic value is greater than hers, my perception of my work and her work perhaps makes me bitter, and jealous in a sense. I could be greedy and overvalue myself and my work, if that was my schtick. I could start painting nails tomorrow and bully my customers into overpaying me, too. OR, I could EARN that money by pursuing a career with greater pay, if money was my schtick. Based on her treatment of me, I'm assuming that money is indeed the nail lady's schtick.
Money isn't my schtick. I just hope I'll be paid what my services are worth, not what I think I deserve. I'm not arrogant in thinking that I'm hot **** because I'm a potential doctor or because I expect to earn a lot of money. I'm intending to do preventive primary care, which pays jack. I'm concerned with how much money I'm NOT going to make. Will I be able to afford becoming a doctor?
Nevertheless, I want to become a doctor and I've been busting my a$$ for a long time, doing what's required to make that happen. This is my choice, I'm committed to it, I'm crazy and want to work hard, it makes me happy, and I hope that it works out for me. Not everyone can become a doctor, and not everyone would want to. Likewise, not everyone can do nails, and not everyone would want to. We're just a big ol' happy family in the marketplace, each of us with a job that's 'real' to us.
And generally speaking, our pay reflects the value of our services: the doctor who performs your brain surgery gets paid more than the person who cooks your fries (or paints your nails). Yes, there are outliers to this general rule: movie stars and athletes that get paid out the wazoo (because society is willing to), yes there are manual laborers who work their asses off and provide value to society and get paid jack so they have to hold three jobs (my father being one of them). The world's a sick place. But there are also those cases of people-- like doctors-- who work their asses off to get into med school, to finish med school, to continue lifelong learning, who sacrifice much of themselves and their families and their free time and their own health to do their work. And yeah, they get paid more. And they deserve it! More so than a tacky strip-mall nail lady who gives me grief about my 20% tip being cheap, but that's just my stress-induced arrogance talking...
So, if after (hopefully) making my comments more clear you still don't agree with me, then that's okay. But, really-- you don't agree with me?!
P.S. I MUST be arrogant to write a post this long. I'm assuming someone will care enough to read it! Or not.
