- Joined
- May 4, 2012
- Messages
- 167
- Reaction score
- 47
I'm a senior in undergrad (yeah, bad time to come to this conclusion), and have spent the last three years of my college career killing myself with working toward getting a BS (...literally) in animal science and simultaneously fulfilling the pre-reqs for vet school (lots and lots of chemistry, a bunch of other crap classes).
Last semester was bad. I was hoping this semester wasn't going to be as bad. It's not. But it's bad in its own way.
Anyway. I've always been a straight-A student, and grades have come relatively easy if I worked for them. But last year seemed to have started this chain-reaction of "I spend hours and hours and hours working through homework and studying and reviewing and preparing--only to do either mediocre or poorly on the exam". It's just like the entire universe is working against me to prevent me from doing the one thing I'll ever be happy doing. I won't be happy working with animals in any other situation than acting as a veterinarian.
I am in organic chemistry right now. I took 1 last spring and I'm in 2 right now.
But recently I just...haven't been interested in the animal science/pre-vet adventure as I had been. The classes are boring, and just something I've begun to see as a pain in my side rather than an opportunity to learn and challenge myself with new ways of thinking and piecing together all my prior knowledge to arrive at a solution to a problem.
I'm tried, I'm frustrated, I'm losing confidence in myself/my abilities like a jet dropping from the sky. What if I can't get it in the first place? What if I fail out because I can't handle it? What if I do graduate (by some miracle) and am still a terrible vet?
Not only do I not see how I'll possibly make the grades I need to finish the LAST EFFING YEAR of school (seriously...I went through three years just to fail against my will in the last one?!), I just don't see how I'd make a good veterinarian. Even if I am smart and have a passion for it.
I've tried talking to my parents about my worries, but they just ignore me and tell me I can do it--like they themselves are unwilling to accept any alternative future.I don't know what else I would do or what else would make me as happy as veterinary medicine, but I honestly don't see it happening any more.
I either won't get accepted, or I will and won't be able to pull through vet school itself.
I've been so depressed and angry and confused; I'm worried and I don't know what to do.
I also come from a line of successful siblings--one is a filthy-rich dentist, the other is a crazy-smart registered dietician, and the other is into architecture. I’ve got extended family members who are doctors, engineers, nurses, pharmacists, organic chemists. So success and intelligence runs in the family. Except for it seems to have skipped me.
I don’t want to be the one failure.
I started the first semester of my college career as an English major because I love(d) creative writing, but the classes and the aspect of "writing" just weren't challenging enough for me. I was bored in a different sense, and yearned for the challenge of learning about the animals I had always had a passion for caring for. But right now...I'd almost welcome the relief of mind-numbingly easy course material. It sounds nice not to have to think or study or work hard or spend hours and hours doing all of the above only to still come out of an exam with a score of 60-70 (organic chemistry).
Last semester was bad. I was hoping this semester wasn't going to be as bad. It's not. But it's bad in its own way.
Anyway. I've always been a straight-A student, and grades have come relatively easy if I worked for them. But last year seemed to have started this chain-reaction of "I spend hours and hours and hours working through homework and studying and reviewing and preparing--only to do either mediocre or poorly on the exam". It's just like the entire universe is working against me to prevent me from doing the one thing I'll ever be happy doing. I won't be happy working with animals in any other situation than acting as a veterinarian.
I am in organic chemistry right now. I took 1 last spring and I'm in 2 right now.
But recently I just...haven't been interested in the animal science/pre-vet adventure as I had been. The classes are boring, and just something I've begun to see as a pain in my side rather than an opportunity to learn and challenge myself with new ways of thinking and piecing together all my prior knowledge to arrive at a solution to a problem.
I'm tried, I'm frustrated, I'm losing confidence in myself/my abilities like a jet dropping from the sky. What if I can't get it in the first place? What if I fail out because I can't handle it? What if I do graduate (by some miracle) and am still a terrible vet?
Not only do I not see how I'll possibly make the grades I need to finish the LAST EFFING YEAR of school (seriously...I went through three years just to fail against my will in the last one?!), I just don't see how I'd make a good veterinarian. Even if I am smart and have a passion for it.
I've tried talking to my parents about my worries, but they just ignore me and tell me I can do it--like they themselves are unwilling to accept any alternative future.I don't know what else I would do or what else would make me as happy as veterinary medicine, but I honestly don't see it happening any more.
I either won't get accepted, or I will and won't be able to pull through vet school itself.
I've been so depressed and angry and confused; I'm worried and I don't know what to do.
I also come from a line of successful siblings--one is a filthy-rich dentist, the other is a crazy-smart registered dietician, and the other is into architecture. I’ve got extended family members who are doctors, engineers, nurses, pharmacists, organic chemists. So success and intelligence runs in the family. Except for it seems to have skipped me.
I don’t want to be the one failure.
I started the first semester of my college career as an English major because I love(d) creative writing, but the classes and the aspect of "writing" just weren't challenging enough for me. I was bored in a different sense, and yearned for the challenge of learning about the animals I had always had a passion for caring for. But right now...I'd almost welcome the relief of mind-numbingly easy course material. It sounds nice not to have to think or study or work hard or spend hours and hours doing all of the above only to still come out of an exam with a score of 60-70 (organic chemistry).
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