Is it a bad sign that I dread going back to med school?

[mmmhmm20]

So I'm on summer break after first year of med school and am really loving feeling like a fully realized human being, interacting with the world in a normal way, not being stressed out about horrid material all the time and just being away from med school. I got a random text from a classmate and it made me think of my med school and the feelings I felt were not...pleasant. I'm not someone who has wanted to be a doctor since I was a fetus and actually found most of first year to be really miserable. The material was unending and mega boring for the most part and I didn't really click with most of my class. I don't know...it seems like a lot of them were in heaven being in med school...most of them seemed to have best friends by the first month and were on their way to making all of their strange workaholic doctor dreams come true. TBH I find a lot of med students and future doctors to be weird (and not in a fun, interesting weird kind of way), and I noticed a lot of personality disorders among my class. Lots of social wannabeism (seriously, it's very odd that people come to med school to try and be the popular kids they never were in high school), lots of obsession with professional success at the expense of caring about anything that's not medically related, lots of socially unaware tendencies and a lot of disingenuous niceties that seem to be a cover for a lot of people who are pathologically competitive and always trying to one up someone else in some way. Maybe that's just life in general, but I found a lot of these kinds of personality traits magnified in med school....I just get the feeling med schools don't really select for generous, happy people who are interested in living lives that don't revolve entirely around medicine. Anyway, sorry, that was long winded. I guess I'm wondering if there are others out there who just don't feel that pumped about med school or medicine...it's ok I guess but I can't pretend that I find most of it that interesting or amazing the way a lot of my classmates do. But maybe all that enthusiasm is just fake. Sometimes I think it has to be because so much of first year was just awful.

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[Donald Juan]

Totally normal. I worry about that person who says they are bored during the summer so they started doing sketchy and pathoma to prepare for M2.

 

[mw18]

I know that you're not alone, because there's a version of this post, or elements of it, every 3 weeks.

First and second year are similar. Third is very different (not necessarily saying it will be better for you). Fourth isn't a real thing.

I'm not arguing with you or saying your class isn't what you say it is. Your perception is very common on sdn. It's just very interesting to me that people who admit they have trouble being happy in their situations then criticize people who are happy, or seem to be, in theirs. I have truly enjoyed my three years of med school. I truly enjoy my classmates. My life doesn't revolve around medicine. I didn't come to re-create myself. I did, however, know what I was getting into.

 

[Osteoth]

Life sucks then you die. Either you make peace with that or you don't...

 

[Aerus]

No matter how happy people seem, everyone goes through their own struggles. I'm one of those people who love medical school and am really enjoying my time here, but that doesn't mean I haven't been dealing with my own personal demons either.

 

[OrthoTraumaMD]

So I'm on summer break after first year of med school and am really loving feeling like a fully realized human being, interacting with the world in a normal way, not being stressed out about horrid material all the time and just being away from med school. I got a random text from a classmate and it made me think of my med school and the feelings I felt were not...pleasant. I'm not someone who has wanted to be a doctor since I was a fetus and actually found most of first year to be really miserable. The material was unending and mega boring for the most part and I didn't really click with most of my class. I don't know...it seems like a lot of them were in heaven being in med school...most of them seemed to have best friends by the first month and were on their way to making all of their strange workaholic doctor dreams come true. TBH I find a lot of med students and future doctors to be weird (and not in a fun, interesting weird kind of way), and I noticed a lot of personality disorders among my class. Lots of social wannabeism (seriously, it's very odd that people come to med school to try and be the popular kids they never were in high school), lots of obsession with professional success at the expense of caring about anything that's not medically related, lots of socially unaware tendencies and a lot of disingenuous niceties that seem to be a cover for a lot of people who are pathologically competitive and always trying to one up someone else in some way. Maybe that's just life in general, but I found a lot of these kinds of personality traits magnified in med school....I just get the feeling med schools don't really select for generous, happy people who are interested in living lives that don't revolve entirely around medicine. Anyway, sorry, that was long winded. I guess I'm wondering if there are others out there who just don't feel that pumped about med school or medicine...it's ok I guess but I can't pretend that I find most of it that interesting or amazing the way a lot of my classmates do. But maybe all that enthusiasm is just fake. Sometimes I think it has to be because so much of first year was just awful.

These feelings are normal. Just make sure you are interested in some part of medicine, so that you can keep going.


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[Arewestilldoingphrasing?]

Lots of social wannabeism (seriously, it's very odd that people come to med school to try and be the popular kids they never were in high school), lots of obsession with professional success at the expense of caring about anything that's not medically related, lots of socially unaware tendencies and a lot of disingenuous niceties that seem to be a cover for a lot of people who are pathologically competitive and always trying to one up someone else in some way.

Also remember that it shouldn't matter what they do as long as they aren't actively harming you. I just ignore it and keep my head down. We aren't necessarily here to make friends (although it is a plus to have at least one or two close ones to lean on), its professional training and it is perfectly acceptable to have a professional but not personal relationship with them.

 

[raiderette]

Not everyone makes friends in med school. My closest friends in my town aren't med students. I don't date people from my class, I work out away from school and I tend to unwind with people who share my interests outside of medicine.
I do, however, love medicine, challenging myself to learn. Hopefully you will like 3rd year or residency.

 

[Raney Schauer]

So I'm on summer break after first year of med school and am really loving feeling like a fully realized human being, interacting with the world in a normal way, not being stressed out about horrid material all the time and just being away from med school. I got a random text from a classmate and it made me think of my med school and the feelings I felt were not...pleasant. I'm not someone who has wanted to be a doctor since I was a fetus and actually found most of first year to be really miserable. The material was unending and mega boring for the most part and I didn't really click with most of my class. I don't know...it seems like a lot of them were in heaven being in med school...most of them seemed to have best friends by the first month and were on their way to making all of their strange workaholic doctor dreams come true. TBH I find a lot of med students and future doctors to be weird (and not in a fun, interesting weird kind of way), and I noticed a lot of personality disorders among my class. Lots of social wannabeism (seriously, it's very odd that people come to med school to try and be the popular kids they never were in high school), lots of obsession with professional success at the expense of caring about anything that's not medically related, lots of socially unaware tendencies and a lot of disingenuous niceties that seem to be a cover for a lot of people who are pathologically competitive and always trying to one up someone else in some way. Maybe that's just life in general, but I found a lot of these kinds of personality traits magnified in med school....I just get the feeling med schools don't really select for generous, happy people who are interested in living lives that don't revolve entirely around medicine. Anyway, sorry, that was long winded. I guess I'm wondering if there are others out there who just don't feel that pumped about med school or medicine...it's ok I guess but I can't pretend that I find most of it that interesting or amazing the way a lot of my classmates do. But maybe all that enthusiasm is just fake. Sometimes I think it has to be because so much of first year was just awful.

If you take out the medical school parts of your complaints about other people and insert nearly anything else, you have a fairly inclusive generic description of how most people are to each other in the real world on any given day. That's not just med school, that's life.

It's not misanthropy, it's just people trying to get theirs.

 

[mmmhmm20]

Yah, I suppose you're right. People tend to be selfish and competitive for evolutionary reasons I suppose. I guess in med school it just seems more annoying because a lot of people put up a disingenuous front about everything being rosy, I love my classmates, we're all in this together, etc. I guess it's better than being straight up awful, but I don't really trust that most med students care that much about other med students when most are obsessed with professional success, adding more stuff to the resume and making sure they get a better step score and have more publications than their classmates.