is this professional

[MSc44]

do you think its professional if you relate (to a person you are treating), that you know what it feels like to deal with a certain problem which they are experiancing. And leave it at that. I wopuld imagine that this would have an extreemly comforting effect on the patient

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[Pterion]

do you think its professional if you relate (to a person you are treating), that you know what it feels like to deal with a certain problem which they are experiancing. And leave it at that. I wopuld imagine that this would have an extremely comforting effect on the patient

As with so many things in this discipline, my answer would be "it depends on the context".
I would have to consider:
--The nature of the problem: a rape counselor executing such a disclosure is a fairly good thing, AA sponsors do this as a matter of course.
--The nature of the therapeutic relationship: how long has this person been a patient?, what effect will such a disclosure have on the relationship?, how realistic is it to expect someone in pain to hear such a thing and not follow it up with a query?, what needs of therapist are being met by such timing and phraseology?, etc.
--and ultimately: how will this benefit the patient. If it clearly will, then press on. If not, time for a consult. If unclear, time for a consult.

Is it "professional"? Excellent question. Consult in person a trusted colleague or mentor and explore the details.

 

[Annakei]

I think it has to do with as another poster said, the context. I worked for a short time at a group home for ex ofenders and the majority of the counselors divulged their SA history and even attended meetings with the group home residents (dont ask!). The residents were noted as saying they were more comfortable with the counselors who had "histories" because they "understand".

Anyhoo...

At my present/FT position, I have related to 2 clients on occasion regarding the loss of a parent. My father past some years back, client mentioned it would be hard for me to understand because I hadnt experiencd a loss. Well I told her that I lost my father and went through counseling as she did. She found it easier to relate to me on the subject from there on. I wouldnt divulge other personal situations because I KNOW in my area it wouldnt help. But again, context and your relationship dictates your level of information exchage. I have clients who have been at my agency for 25 years and know our supervisors.CEOs VERY well. So again it depends...

mind telling what it is?

 

[PublicHealth]

I think it has to do with as another poster said, the context. I worked for a short time at a group home for ex ofenders and the majority of the counselors divulged their SA history and even attended meetings with the group home residents (dont ask!). The residents were noted as saying they were more comfortable with the counselors who had "histories" because they "understand".

Anyhoo...

At my present/FT position, I have related to 2 clients on occasion regarding the loss of a parent. My father past some years back, client mentioned it would be hard for me to understand because I hadnt experiencd a loss. Well I told her that I lost my father and went through counseling as she did. She found it easier to relate to me on the subject from there on. I wouldnt divulge other personal situations because I KNOW in my area it wouldnt help. But again, context and your relationship dictates your level of information exchage. I have clients who have been at my agency for 25 years and know our supervisors.CEOs VERY well. So again it depends...

mind telling what it is?

What types of interventions are available for grief? I've heard a lot about supportive/empathic listening, but are there any specific interventions?

 

[MSc44]

I think it has to do with as another poster said, the context. I worked for a short time at a group home for ex ofenders and the majority of the counselors divulged their SA history and even attended meetings with the group home residents (dont ask!). The residents were noted as saying they were more comfortable with the counselors who had "histories" because they "understand".

Anyhoo...

At my present/FT position, I have related to 2 clients on occasion regarding the loss of a parent. My father past some years back, client mentioned it would be hard for me to understand because I hadnt experiencd a loss. Well I told her that I lost my father and went through counseling as she did. She found it easier to relate to me on the subject from there on. I wouldnt divulge other personal situations because I KNOW in my area it wouldnt help. But again, context and your relationship dictates your level of information exchage. I have clients who have been at my agency for 25 years and know our supervisors.CEOs VERY well. So again it depends...

mind telling what it is?

Thanks for the replys guys!
You know i went through a tuff time for a few years , late teens early 20's. I was always a bit of an obsessive person hence my good grades and motivation. However a life experiance(which should have been a beneficica one was not) and it triggered an attack of OCD (purely obsessional thoughts) I did not realize at the time and did not know how to help myself, I was young and not experianced......not getting help right away lead to much greater anxiety, negative obsessions and it became depressing for me. Although none of this was ever dabilitating for me it was at the time extreemly hard. I finally decided to see a psych MD who just completly did not understand, he was just an elitest who just medicated and went home to sip wine and engage in cocktail parties. He was a colleague of my dads(also a physician) but it was just not a good thing, as a result it did not really help me. Although he did introduce me to effexor which contributed to my healing for about the 5 months i took it. Anyway i found a psychologist who i feel has helped me in so many more ways then the MD did and to this day i still go to him. He is a great guy. I remember once he told me he knows what it feels like to be miserable.......... I often wonder if psychologists just say that to their patients to m ake them feel better. Im not sure this is the case with him cause he is very matter of fact and never tells me things to just make me feel better. But i often wonder what his backround is. I asked all this also because i have always wanted to become a physician, and if i ever was in a position where i was caring for someone who is dealing with these things, i would like to make then know that they are not alone and things do work out. I feel this is a vital part of the recovery process for the patiens, when they can relate to the provider, It has worked for me

 

[Flutterbyu]

It's really important to draw the line between your clinical self and your personal self. It is better to be empathetic and learn how to make yourself appear to be so without disclosing personal experiences. Remember, your client is in therapy, not you, and although you may think it will help the client, it is my experience that allowing the the client to develop his/her own way of dealing/coping/growing, rather than reflecting on your own past experiences provides a more richer therapeutic environment. That being said, yes it depends on context, theoretical perspective, and the level of repore you have established with this person.

I had a wild and crazy adolescence, resulting in years of drug abuse and high risk behaviors, but I do not under normal circumstances divulge this information to the substance abuse clients (or any clients) I see. I am not running an AA or NA clinic and there are appropriate venues for that type of sharing that I will suggest to some of my clients. The work that happens behind my closed office door is focused completely on the client. I don't usually even share the fact that I am a mom, even though I shave some colleagues who disclose this info regularly. I think it is better to establish empathy without crossing the line between clinician and friend and disclosing unnecessary info. I have a fellow intern that is seeing a woman who is dealing with her son's reaction to her divorce. The intern feels very strongly for this client because she went through a similar experience with her own parent's divorce. Rather than sharing all her personal experiences, she shared that she was a child of divorce, but that was as far as she went. She is using her memories and past feelings to help guide her empathetic understanding of the client and the client's family.

I would suggest some reading by Carl Rogers- there are many ways to establish empathy other than verbal expression. Good luck And remember- our field is grey, you will not find a definitive answer to this question.

 

[Flutterbyu]

haha- correction- I "have some colleagues," I do not "shave some colleagues." Man, talk about crossing the line!!

 

[psych101]

I agree with Flutterbyu's comments -- great feedback. Some clinicians are going to feel more comfortable with innocuous self-disclosure, some don't do much at all. In some situations, tellling a story to illustrate an idea makes it more relevant and useful. You can also do this by framing the story (without identifying info) about someone you know or someone with whom you've worked. But there is a difference between innocuous self-disclosure and revealing too much about yourself. Overburdening your client with too much info about your own problems might make them begin to question your competency. Crosses a weird boundary in most cases.

 

[Annakei]

I agree with Flutterbyu's comments -- great feedback. Some clinicians are going to feel more comfortable with innocuous self-disclosure, some don't do much at all. In some situations, tellling a story to illustrate an idea makes it more relevant and useful. You can also do this by framing the story (without identifying info) about someone you know or someone with whom you've worked. But there is a difference between innocuous self-disclosure and revealing too much about yourself. Overburdening your client with too much info about your own problems might make them begin to question your competency. Crosses a weird boundary in most cases.

I agree but again, it depends on the context and how much you know the client. As far as SPECIFIC interventions fopr grief? None other than supportive counseling and perhaps a referral to a therapist if the grief is becoming overburdening.

To address the comment about overburdening the client and the therapist not being in therapy with the client........ehhh I choose not to see it as such. That was a way for me to relate my own history, experience and subsequent therapy to aid in dealing with the grief. I have clients who are HIV positive and with the exception of the one I had a countertransferrence issue with the rest have been positive client/CM relationships. I have been given clients because I understand the client who has HIV in their environment and also being able to relate to them on that level as someone who has lost their family member do to this illness. In that situation I thought it appropriate and received no backlash from my supervisors. *shrug*

ETA: It helps to normalize their feelings around the grief because they tend to think that they are the only one that this is happening to. However, giving an example (myself, the CM who they need to trust to have a propsperous relationship) demonstrates someone that has endured the same issue and is doing fine afterwards.

 

[psych101]

In the instance Annakei describes I completely agree that this type of disclosure is appropriate. I guess what I find less appropriate (at least for me) is commiserating with your client about your own history of depression, anxiety, ocd, eating disorder, substance abuse issues, etc. Somehow it seems to me that, although we all are at risk for dealing with at least one of these issues in at least one point during our lives, disclosing the personal experience of such issues tends to discredit the therapist. Although the temptation might be to say, "I understand what you're going through, I've been through it myself and my experience was....," it creates a risk that the client might questions whether the therapist is strong enough to handle what they came in to get help for. Yes, I guess that reflects and reinforces a stigma that therapists aren't supposed to have problems. But if the client is looking for someone to commiserate with, they need a best friend - not a therapist. Somehow describing a situation that you observed or experienced as a situational or external experience seems to be a better choice for illustrating a point in therapy. But that's a generalization and I guess it really does depend on the specific situation. Always good to get supervision/consultation on things like this.

 

[Flutterbyu]

I would also like to add that I am always shopping around for new opportunities and in researching an internship at Dana Farber Cancer Institutue in Boston, I came across this statement:

"Anyone who has recently suffered a personal loss, particularly from cancer, should think seriously before applying here."

Tha same applies for there fellowship program. It is always good to have work touch on a personal note, but it gets dicey when the therapist is involved with a particular niche in order to provide some self-healing. And this is done on many levels, many of which are probably subconscious.

 

[Annakei]

In the instance Annakei describes I completely agree that this type of disclosure is appropriate. I guess what I find less appropriate (at least for me) is commiserating with your client about your own history of depression, anxiety, ocd, eating disorder, substance abuse issues, etc. Somehow it seems to me that, although we all are at risk for dealing with at least one of these issues in at least one point during our lives, disclosing the personal experience of such issues tends to discredit the therapist. Although the temptation might be to say, "I understand what you're going through, I've been through it myself and my experience was....," it creates a risk that the client might questions whether the therapist is strong enough to handle what they came in to get help for. Yes, I guess that reflects and reinforces a stigma that therapists aren't supposed to have problems. But if the client is looking for someone to commiserate with, they need a best friend - not a therapist. Somehow describing a situation that you observed or experienced as a situational or external experience seems to be a better choice for illustrating a point in therapy. But that's a generalization and I guess it really does depend on the specific situation. Always good to get supervision/consultation on things like this.

I agree, more like a NA/AA sponsor. There is a fine line however. I know that in DC there is the model that addictions counselors/therapists who have their OWN histories are welcomed because that model states clients will "connect" with that therapist on a different level as opposed to someone sans SA hx.

I have experienced this as the group home where I worked with ex offenders who refused to discuss their SA hx with me because somehow I didnt understand...go figure..

 

[Annakei]

I would also like to add that I am always shopping around for new opportunities and in researching an internship at Dana Farber Cancer Institutue in Boston, I came across this statement:

"Anyone who has recently suffered a personal loss, particularly from cancer, should think seriously before applying here."

Tha same applies for there fellowship program. It is always good to have work touch on a personal note, but it gets dicey when the therapist is involved with a particular niche in order to provide some self-healing. And this is done on many levels, many of which are probably subconscious.

You are soooo right about this one! It happens more often than you think, though not intentionally, but once addressed can make for the better..