Dear jlinn01,
I welcome your comments. After all, no one is an island. We all have a voice.
My GOAL was to respond honestly to another person's communication. I stand by my comments and I make no aplogies for my words.
We are all responsible for our actions.
Condescension is the realm of fools.
May I ask how familiar you are with your facts? Are you familiar with the abusive and sophomoric (sic) nature of [popoman's] postings? Are you aware that he has used the terms "drunk" and "loser" in his comments to other people's postings? Have you read the negative postings that other members have submitted--some of whom use NO uncertain harsh terms. Have THOSE individuals benefitted from your ideas? If not, I am proud that you have chosen me for your response. My posting obviously meant something to you.
I am willingly excercising my right to respond in the face of abuse of privilege (and free speech is privilege). It may not be my place to set popoman straight, but by the tone and content of your response, it looks like we're in the same boat.
Tell me, what problem do you you have with being assertive and straightforward in the face of blatant crassness--or would you rather sit comfortably numb in your cocoon of institutionalized apathy which has become the hallmark of political corectness? Part of the skill of working with others is not to back down from a bully and to state your opinions straighforwardly--there is a lot to be said for the direct approach.
Does your conception of me have any basis in fact, in the knowledge of my nature, my ability to work with people, to show compassion for the sick and the dying? Were you there by my side at the hospital yesterday, when I listened to a patient and held her hands while she talked about her fears about her new cancer diagnosis?
You know nothing of the way I intereract with the hospital team of nurses, techs and physicians with whom I work on a daily basis and yet you presume to offer me advice in relating to others. You also assume that compassion is something that you can work on, rather than a common quality which is innate in the make-up of MOST human beings. You cannot study compassion. If it's not genuine, you are better off on the set of "ER" than with real patients.
You seem more involved with "leadership" issues that have a secondary relevance to the goal of good patient care. Such hierarchichal thinking is the reason that so many doctors are viewed as arrogant and unapproachable. Will you continue a bad precedent?
I have been very fortunate to have the honor to work with professionals who understand the way that a team, like a family, works (it is not always sunshine and roses), and--I wish the same for you someday since you couch your comments in very,very hypothetical terms. You do not seem to know of what you speak. You offer no personal experiences of your own to support your assertions on the workaday relationships with your colleages. Working on a team can be trying but it is always rewarding.
EVERYONE is entitled to respect, as long as it is earned. I expect no more and no less than I give to others.
As long as you--in VERY thinly veiled arrogance ("rude, snobbish")--are offering advice on behavior, may I offer you these points that very, very wise people have passed on to me:
1. Always listen and get your facts straight before you respond to someone else.
2. If you want to set an example, be an example. "..finding people stupid enough to work with you..(and I quote)" is not conducive to civil exchange. In fact, based on your standpoint, it is DOWNRIGHT hypocritical, and to use your word: CONDESCENING.
3. Do not jump to conclusions: The harshness of your invective says more about your willingness to take isolated incidents and to
draw broad, general conclusions from them. Conclusions which are fueled more by an emotional component than an empirical one.
This is hardly the way a physician/scientist
should conduct his/her affairs. Your patients will NEVER benefit from your being a loose cannon.
The medical world is full of harsh realities, among them people and personalities which can be abrasive and even difficult at times. Maybe you have been hurt before, maybe you have found yourself in a position where you were at a loss for words as to how to respond. Perhaps you should spend more time developing tolerance and a thicker skin rather than cultivating this saccharine, rose-colored fantasy world that you hope to inhabit.
So the next time you feel the urge to micromanage, keep in mind that someone will be listening to what you have to say and will have their own opinions and experiences to share. I welcome your response.
