- Joined
- Oct 2, 2009
- Messages
- 8
- Reaction score
- 0
I'm really close to being accepted to a PsyD program, and now that the possibility of getting in seems real, I'm starting to have major doubt/panic about what I'm getting myself into.
I've worked really hard to get where I am. I went back to school to do a psych undergrad degree specifically so that I could apply to PsyD programs, interviewed at my top choice, and have a phone interview this week to confirm research interests, etc.
I'm freaking out! I'm prone to anxiety and depression, and in fact I take medication to help deal with it. I'm really scared that the stress in grad school is going to send me spiraling down into a deep depression, or that I'm going to spend the next four years constantly on the verge on a panic attack. Reading the recent thread 'would you do it again', with all the dismal answers, I think that really contributed to this feeling. It's scary to commit myself so fully to a career, even though I've wanted this SO badly for so many years! I feel like I was too idealistic before, and now that I'm faced with the reality of getting in I realize how much work and stress this is going to be.
I'm scared of being poor and in debt and having to drop out of my program. I'll have to take out about 10 000 in loans per year to finance it, and I already have a 30 000 dollar student loan. I'm scared of not finding a job once I'm done. I'm scared of not being able to manage my depression and anxiety in grad school.
WHen I googled this, all I came up with were horror stories and news articles about how grad school is a breeding grounds for depression, and that so many grad students feel suicidal at some point, and I'm just really scared to jump into this.
I can't think of anything else I would want to do, though. Maybe a masters in counselling psychology, but I wanted the PsyD so much more than that, and even the masters would freak me out. It would just be comforting to know that I'd be done after two years.
I have my final interview this week and I'm scared of sabotaging myself so that I don't get in, but I'm also scared of doing well and getting in!
Has anyone else faced this much anxiety on the brink of getting accepted to grad school? How do I stay positive in face of the overwhelming evidence that grad school is going to suck my soul and turn me into a neurotic mess? I really want to follow this career path, I'm just really, really terrified.
I've worked really hard to get where I am. I went back to school to do a psych undergrad degree specifically so that I could apply to PsyD programs, interviewed at my top choice, and have a phone interview this week to confirm research interests, etc.
I'm freaking out! I'm prone to anxiety and depression, and in fact I take medication to help deal with it. I'm really scared that the stress in grad school is going to send me spiraling down into a deep depression, or that I'm going to spend the next four years constantly on the verge on a panic attack. Reading the recent thread 'would you do it again', with all the dismal answers, I think that really contributed to this feeling. It's scary to commit myself so fully to a career, even though I've wanted this SO badly for so many years! I feel like I was too idealistic before, and now that I'm faced with the reality of getting in I realize how much work and stress this is going to be.
I'm scared of being poor and in debt and having to drop out of my program. I'll have to take out about 10 000 in loans per year to finance it, and I already have a 30 000 dollar student loan. I'm scared of not finding a job once I'm done. I'm scared of not being able to manage my depression and anxiety in grad school.
WHen I googled this, all I came up with were horror stories and news articles about how grad school is a breeding grounds for depression, and that so many grad students feel suicidal at some point, and I'm just really scared to jump into this.
I can't think of anything else I would want to do, though. Maybe a masters in counselling psychology, but I wanted the PsyD so much more than that, and even the masters would freak me out. It would just be comforting to know that I'd be done after two years.
I have my final interview this week and I'm scared of sabotaging myself so that I don't get in, but I'm also scared of doing well and getting in!
Has anyone else faced this much anxiety on the brink of getting accepted to grad school? How do I stay positive in face of the overwhelming evidence that grad school is going to suck my soul and turn me into a neurotic mess? I really want to follow this career path, I'm just really, really terrified.