The Masters is because I don't have enough research under my belt. In addition, I felt it would help put a competitive edge on us. I don't know if a lot of MD/PhD people already have grad degrees, but it doesn't sound like it. I felt that would increase our chances. Add to that stellar MCAT scores and high GPA's- with a Masters and some time to do research, I feel we can only increase the odds. I figure it's two years out of our lives to help secure the path to the rest of our life. I may be young, but truthfully, once I am committed to something, I don't change my mind. I know what I want, and I will go for that. I would not mind to do MD, then take a PhD later(though I honestly feel the MD/PhD programs truly explore all aspects of medicine in the set-up of the curricullum), but I feel both are important to the carrer I want to pursue, and personally, for a deeper understanding. I never even really considered taking them apart because I did not think that the loans would allow for living expenses. I also was told that loans cannot be taken out for more than $30,000/year. What if that only covers tuition?
And about children- you are right, it is hard on them to pursue something that puts such constraints on your time. But please consider this. It will teach our daughter to value education and to work hard. When we do this, I will do my best to impose as few sacrifices on her as possible. I do believe it is possible that we can be as much a part of her life as children need. That's a big reason why we don't do daycare now. She gets half the day with her daddy and half the day with her mommy, and she loves the weekends and holidays when it's all of us together. If nothing else, with the two of us in school and school only, we will actually be home at the same time more often than we are now. Granted, it will be spent studying. I also know it is uncomparable, but even at 18 credit hours, when I get home from school, I play with my daughter and spend time with her until it is time for her to sleep. Then I start my studies/homework. It allows a break from my day and from thinking in general, just to de-stress and escape to somewhere else for a little while. And my daughter gets "mommy time". Every night, and every weekend. If I know med school is demanding, but I can work 50 hour weeks and handle 18 credit hours, and not fluffy classes, but actual meat and potatoes courses, get the highest grades in all my classes and still be a mommy that is capable of showing her daughter as much love and devotion and affection as any other 6 month old receives from a stay at home mom that never goes to school, etc. I function that way because of the support network between my husband and I. We have each other and that's how we do it and that's how we've done it all along. We've faced great obstacles aside from this as well, and we've only proven that we can handle it. I am not worried about handling it, or balancing priorities. I believe with a lot of hard work, it is possible not to sacrifice family for medicine.
I know it can be tough at times, but my daughter will always know she is loved and that I am devoted to her.
The main question in my post is about finances. I just really don't know much about this aspect of med school and everything I have read about married med students are about med students that are married, but their spouse is a non-med student. I really specifically would like to know what two married med students do financially. I know it's been done before, I just wondered how.
I know that the MSTP provide stipends as someone else mentioned in their posts above, however in some schools those are only during the graduate years, and in other schools it is the whole time, and still in other schools, they accept more people than they have funding for, therefore some students do get accepted, but without funding. If that's the case, I wanted to have a "Plan B" for finances. I don't want to solely rely on the idea that we would both get accepted to programs AND both be fully funded with stipends throughout. That is highly difficult to attain, but not impossible, and I believe we could do it(no doubt in my mind we COULD do it), but want to have back up plans for finances. The loans would be fine- we could pay those back once we got out(or rather, defer them until we finish our fellowships & then pay them back when we finish those). Would be nice to have a scholarship, but if not, it wouldn't really be a huge issue. The everyday living expenses, however, is where I've been stuck.
We have both always worked. Before the baby, we both worked two jobs and went to school full time. So, I am not sure how to do it with NEITHER of us working....
Anyways, still open to more advice/experience.
I will check into the loans with the local med school & ask them about living expenses as well. I appreciate all of your responses thus far.