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Which specialty?
Finish. It's much better as an attending, in the sense that you can do/work as much as you want [the patients don't get better . . . .people are still crazier than ever, but easier to ignore the stupid sht as an attending.]
make some money, pay back your debts, get into some good hobbies (golf, guitar, whiskey). Then punch out if you're still upset.
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But you do have a debt, a nearly half a million dollar one. I'm sorry to be a debbie-downer, but there probably aren't many non-clinical jobs (especially for a young junior physician) that can pay off a debt like that (this is the curse of medicine, we get locked in) . . .unless of course you find the next great bitcoin.
Your saving grace is that you're in a short residency, so you'll be done in about 1.5 years? Best plan would probably be to work as a Ped attending for 3-5 years, pay off the debt, save some money, and during that time explore other non-clinical opportunities (after at least 5 years as a working Ped, you'll likely have more options).
If you quit now, you have nothing, and you have no real means to pay that debt back.
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Yeah I agree with above—even if you ultimately want a nonclinical job, step 1 in your plan always going to start with “become board certified.” No matter what consulting/pharma/whatever path you head down, you’re going to be much more valuable to a potential employer once you’re board certified. Realistically you also will probably need a few years of practicing, though maybe there are some jobs out there that you could angle for without being BC.
In any event, failing to complete the last 1.5 years of residency and taking your boards would be catastrophic from a financial standpoint. Get therapy, get additional support in whatever form you need, but unless you’re so depressed that you literally cannot survive the remainder of your residency then you need to tough it out.
In any event, failing to complete the last 1.5 years of residency and taking your boards would be catastrophic from a financial standpoint. Get therapy, get additional support in whatever form you need, but unless you’re so depressed that you literally cannot survive the remainder of your residency then you need to tough it out.
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It would take a bit more time, but look into Preventive (or occupational) med. I think preventive more than occ, because you could apply your peds experience to it more readily.
You need to do an intern year to enter preventive, but they might count your first peds year as that. The link below says "12 months in ACGME residency", so I think you'd have that prereq done...and that's all you would need to apply. You'd have to get something together expressing your interest in that field if you apply.
Typically the preventive residency will get you an MPH (accelerated timeline) and you'll do rotations, but it is generally a more non-clinical field (under the assumption that clinical work is what is getting you down). It is its own boarded specialty, so you would technically be double boarded right away: Peds and preventive (assuming you finish peds and take boards). You may let your peds boarded status lapse if you don't do anything in it clinically, but it would make sense to at least get your initial board status in peds if you ever went back in that direction in the future.
I'd agree with above advice to finish off peds since it's not too long of a residency. If you can stomach another few years with a resident's salary, look into preventive. If you are halfway through peds, you could hopefully get an app together and apply.
I'm not sure if you apply a year ahead or the year of prospective start. You'd have to find that out. If it's the year of, you're good...just apply next year during 3rd year of peds residency. If you have to apply a year ahead (meaning the normal start timeline accounts for doing the intern year), then you'd have to apply this year/early 2022, but you'd still make it so you could start right in at the end of your peds residency. You'd have to contact someone to be sure of the timeline as I don't want to tell you either way since I'm not entirely sure on that one.
www.acpm.org
www.acpm.org
Someone I graduated med school with and who was a fellow intern went this route. I always low key liked the idea of it (I already had gotten an MPH/MD combined degree) and if I didn't luckily land where I am now, was starting to think about doing it.
You need to do an intern year to enter preventive, but they might count your first peds year as that. The link below says "12 months in ACGME residency", so I think you'd have that prereq done...and that's all you would need to apply. You'd have to get something together expressing your interest in that field if you apply.
Typically the preventive residency will get you an MPH (accelerated timeline) and you'll do rotations, but it is generally a more non-clinical field (under the assumption that clinical work is what is getting you down). It is its own boarded specialty, so you would technically be double boarded right away: Peds and preventive (assuming you finish peds and take boards). You may let your peds boarded status lapse if you don't do anything in it clinically, but it would make sense to at least get your initial board status in peds if you ever went back in that direction in the future.
I'd agree with above advice to finish off peds since it's not too long of a residency. If you can stomach another few years with a resident's salary, look into preventive. If you are halfway through peds, you could hopefully get an app together and apply.
I'm not sure if you apply a year ahead or the year of prospective start. You'd have to find that out. If it's the year of, you're good...just apply next year during 3rd year of peds residency. If you have to apply a year ahead (meaning the normal start timeline accounts for doing the intern year), then you'd have to apply this year/early 2022, but you'd still make it so you could start right in at the end of your peds residency. You'd have to contact someone to be sure of the timeline as I don't want to tell you either way since I'm not entirely sure on that one.
What is Preventive Medicine?
The goal of Preventive Medicine is to protect, promote, and maintain health and well-being and to prevent disease, disability, and death. Learn more here.
www.acpm.org
Preventive Medicine Residency Programs
Looking for Preventive Medicine residency Programs? We offer students an exciting blend of clinical medicine with special skill sets. Find opportunities here.
www.acpm.org
Someone I graduated med school with and who was a fellow intern went this route. I always low key liked the idea of it (I already had gotten an MPH/MD combined degree) and if I didn't luckily land where I am now, was starting to think about doing it.
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Options:
1. Stick it out in Peds, try to find some part of it you like to practice in. Sounds like that's a dead end for you.
2. Swicth fields. Already mentioned is PM/OM. Unlikely you'd be happy in path. You haven't mentioned what makes you miserable, so it's hard to give advice.
3. You could quit and try to find a job. You might be able to work for a state insurance commission, or by processing prior auths for an insurance company. But I wouldn't expect to make much more than $100K with those positions, and your options will be very limited. These types of jobs are not easy to find. But they are 9-5 with no nights or weekends, if that's what you are looking for.
4. People talk about "consulting". But these types of jobs are often very pedigree driven. You need skills, or connections
5. Be creative. If you got into medical school, you're smart. So you can do something else. But there's no easy path here. Find some way to leverage your medical knowledge in business, tech, etc. People won't come knocking on your door -- you'll need to find your own way and impress them.
6. You could "go for PSLF". Quit residency. Join the peace corp, or something else that qualifies. Could you find something that allows you to do some clinical work with only an intern year? Maybe, although not much. But you then put your loans into a repayment plan. They are capped at some amount of your salary -- since your salary is small, your payments are small. 10 years later, if all goes well, your loans are forgiven. But in the meantime you should expect a pretty minimal salary.
The problem, as already documented by others, is that most of the non-practicing pathways are not well paying, and not guaranteed in any way. Sure, you can pay off that debt with a sub $100K job -- but you won't be able to afford much else. You'll end up in a repayment plan, which will end in 10 years (with a public service job) or 25 years. Will that job be enough to "provide for your family"? Depends upon your definition of "provide".
1. Stick it out in Peds, try to find some part of it you like to practice in. Sounds like that's a dead end for you.
2. Swicth fields. Already mentioned is PM/OM. Unlikely you'd be happy in path. You haven't mentioned what makes you miserable, so it's hard to give advice.
3. You could quit and try to find a job. You might be able to work for a state insurance commission, or by processing prior auths for an insurance company. But I wouldn't expect to make much more than $100K with those positions, and your options will be very limited. These types of jobs are not easy to find. But they are 9-5 with no nights or weekends, if that's what you are looking for.
4. People talk about "consulting". But these types of jobs are often very pedigree driven. You need skills, or connections
5. Be creative. If you got into medical school, you're smart. So you can do something else. But there's no easy path here. Find some way to leverage your medical knowledge in business, tech, etc. People won't come knocking on your door -- you'll need to find your own way and impress them.
6. You could "go for PSLF". Quit residency. Join the peace corp, or something else that qualifies. Could you find something that allows you to do some clinical work with only an intern year? Maybe, although not much. But you then put your loans into a repayment plan. They are capped at some amount of your salary -- since your salary is small, your payments are small. 10 years later, if all goes well, your loans are forgiven. But in the meantime you should expect a pretty minimal salary.
The problem, as already documented by others, is that most of the non-practicing pathways are not well paying, and not guaranteed in any way. Sure, you can pay off that debt with a sub $100K job -- but you won't be able to afford much else. You'll end up in a repayment plan, which will end in 10 years (with a public service job) or 25 years. Will that job be enough to "provide for your family"? Depends upon your definition of "provide".
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Yeah I mean I think the first thing here is WHY are you so miserable? "I hate medicine" means a lot of things. It can mean I hate all the admin work I have to do, I hate getting shat on as a resident, I hate my attendings, I hate my program, I hate taking q4 call, I hate all the crazy parents/patients, I hate endless rounding, I hate the pathophysiology in my field, I hate feeling like I'm always having to learn a whole new system every rotation, I hate cramming an entire well child visit into 15 minutes, I hate going to deliveries, etc etc etc. There's like 100 subtle different ways you can "hate" your field or the entire field of medicine and there's huge differences between many of these. "I hate medicine" is much too broad.
For many people who come in to this field, there's a certain romantization of the field you don't find in many other jobs. It's pretty encapsulated by your quote above:
Hate to break it to ya, but you and most everyone else with a family feel the same way. The vast majority of people in the world tolerate their job as a means to an end (get money to survive, support my family and be able to have some leisure time). People like or dislike their jobs to varying degrees but bailing out to a career where you very realistically will probably make 50-100K LESS then you would have otherwise (even in peds, you can get outpatient jobs out of residency making high 100s/low 200s annually) with 425K loan burden is almost a surefire way to a worse position than you are right now.
I agree, some psychotherapy to figure out what exactly you're unhappy about and figure out if this can be realistically reframed might do you a lot of good here. You may thank yourself in the future.
For many people who come in to this field, there's a certain romantization of the field you don't find in many other jobs. It's pretty encapsulated by your quote above:
Hate to break it to ya, but you and most everyone else with a family feel the same way. The vast majority of people in the world tolerate their job as a means to an end (get money to survive, support my family and be able to have some leisure time). People like or dislike their jobs to varying degrees but bailing out to a career where you very realistically will probably make 50-100K LESS then you would have otherwise (even in peds, you can get outpatient jobs out of residency making high 100s/low 200s annually) with 425K loan burden is almost a surefire way to a worse position than you are right now.
I agree, some psychotherapy to figure out what exactly you're unhappy about and figure out if this can be realistically reframed might do you a lot of good here. You may thank yourself in the future.
Well even as an attending, Peds unfortunately pays on the lower end. With that said I did find Pediatrics to be a rather rough rotation, with a lot of passive aggressiveness and overall unpleasant. The problem is that for one you have a lot of debt. Hard to pay off. I suppose that if you can't pay it and ask for loan forgiveness/to get it forgiven in a bankruptcy scenario that might damage your long term options for home buying, etc.
I would have said sometimes a different field is important - do you hate all of medicine or just pediatrics?
the problem that if you were to change you'd have to start all over - that would add to your misery. My advice would be to finish - it might suck and you might hate it, but it's 1.5 years. Then you can choose to do something else - non-clinical. It's better than starting over. There are far more options for u after you are done than to be a residency drop out (I dont mean this harshly but this is how you will be viewed).
I would suck it up even if you hate it - maybe you can do electives in your third year or something to make it more palatable. There aren't a ton of nonclinical options if you haven't finished residency
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I admit to occasionally browsing this non-clinical jobs site: DOC - Innovative healthcare careers for doctors and scientists
Also take a look at the current situation of PSLF--there are some leniencies happening right now that may allow you to count payments already made during residency, or "payments" made during the $0 pandemic payment freeze, even if you weren't thinking about PSLF initially. I am not an expert on the details since I've been thinking PSLF from the beginning and don't need a waiver. https://studentaid.gov/announcements-events/pslf-limited-waiver
My plan B is to go back to work in social services, where I was before, and get my loans forgiven via PSLF. Idealist --> Jobs, Volunteering, Grad Schools, and More can give you an idea of what's out there in the nonprofit world.
Hang in there!
Also take a look at the current situation of PSLF--there are some leniencies happening right now that may allow you to count payments already made during residency, or "payments" made during the $0 pandemic payment freeze, even if you weren't thinking about PSLF initially. I am not an expert on the details since I've been thinking PSLF from the beginning and don't need a waiver. https://studentaid.gov/announcements-events/pslf-limited-waiver
My plan B is to go back to work in social services, where I was before, and get my loans forgiven via PSLF. Idealist --> Jobs, Volunteering, Grad Schools, and More can give you an idea of what's out there in the nonprofit world.
Hang in there!
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I thought about Path or Rads. I'm double boarded in a clinical and path specialty. I much prefer the path side and only practice one day a week in the clinical realm. As you pointed out, we don't know more specifically what makes the OP miserable currently, so it's tough to say. Preventive/Occ would be a smoother transition to getting out there and working, but I guess Path or Rads would also be an option. While very niche, Peds Path and Peds Rads do exist as well.
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The limited waiver is beneficial for those who have already been paying back loans for 10 years but were on the wrong repayment plan or didn't have eligible loans. It's probably not useful to someone halfway through residency now, because chances are they are already on an income-driven repayment plan and in most cases are with a qualified employer (unless OP is with an HCA residency, in which case, I can see why they hate life).
Rads is rough, definitely not lifestyle, and a longgggggg road.
Boy oh boy, you are me. A few weeks ago, I resigned from residency. I could not take it anymore. I HATED it and was completely miserable. There was no fixing it. I also stayed because I have obscene amounts of debt. There was no “tough it out” because there is a zero percent chance I would ever want to do patient care. This is not what I thought it was going to be. Since resigning, I have a huge weight lifted. I actually feel relieved and open to possibilities. I got my license and am searching non clinical jobs either as a medical science liaison or some entry level consulting. There are things out there, not tons, but there are things. You are not stuck. I am happy making a fraction of the salary and not having my soul sold to the devil. I plan to pay 10% of my loans until I die and they’re discharged. On these forums, you will find nothing but resistance to quitting the traditional path. Not everyone has to be traditional and trust me, health care is going to **** quickly and things will only get worse. Happy to be out. Cheers 🍻
Are you in ER? I would imagine ER is tough. I hated my ER rotation. I think the big problem with Medicine is how brutal the path is. The shifts we are forced to endure, the menial pay, the abuse from attending and nurses - it should stop. I don't know if there is any other profession out there that's like that. The problem is that the massive debt incurred for many people is soooo problematic. It's tough. I think a culture change is desperately needed.
Good luck. You may want to look at LookforZebras.
No I ended up doing family medicine which is equally torture. I completely agree with you. The debt is what gets people forced on the hampster wheel as I call it. I will look into that thank you. I have been looking on drop out club too which has some interesting opportunities as well.
Well I personally think that despite you disliking the specialty finishing would have been best even if you don't do a single clinical day in your life. For IM/FM there are many administrtrive non clinical options. But without finishing residency it becomes much harder. Just reality. Best of luck
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Make sure you truly don't like any part of Peds AT ALL and the issue isn't just with you not liking your particular residency program. Residency is hard almost anywhere and often doesn't fully represent your daily schedule as an attending. Do others in your program feel feel the same way? If so you may just be in malignant residency program (while peds residencies aren't notorious for being malignant, I'm sure there are always exceptions). If you can power through residency, you may be able to find a niche within peds that you like and do that full time. If the issue is specific with Peds you may be able to switch specialties but this isn't always easy to do (especially for the more competitive ones).
It's not easy to switch full time non-clinical work overnight and make as much as a physician right away doing non-clinical work. Most people who transition out of clinical practice do it gradually over several years. For example, they may work part time as a clinician while working part time in their non-clinical work until they can build enough volume in their new line of work to make it full time and slowly decrease their clinical work over time. But obviously this transition can only happen after residency since you can't be a part-time resident.
Since peds is near the bottom of physician compensation, it it will likely be hard to pay back $425k in debt even practicing peds full time. In your case, going for PSLF is a good option for someone with a high debt to income ratio.
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Technically there are some programs that do allow part time residencies. it's rare but happen. I agree with you though. and non-clinical work takes a long time to acquire and typically comes from some sort of clinical expertise.
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Rads and path are often popular choices for those wanting to switch out of patient-centered clinical specialties for reasons like having to deal with difficult patients or lots of paperwork or working long hours. Decent choices bu
Rads has long training (1 prelim year + 4 years + 1 year of nearly required fellowship). OP's intern year likely counts toward the prelim year requirement so that's still another 5 years. Also rads is still moderately competitive and quite a bit harder to get into than peds so no guarantee OP will match. And while the lifestyle in rads residency may be better than most other specialties, nowadays it's rarely the case as an attending (unless you work in academics or VA for significantly less pay). Radiology is a 24 hr business and reimbursements for imaging are decreasing all the time so radiologists are working long hours including nights and weekends, and reading very high volumes that are often not safe.
Path is still pretty cush with minimal call responsibilities and has always had once of the lowest burnout rates of any specialty. The 2 major problems are that pay is a lot less than rads, and the job market has always been tight since there tends to a good portion of older pathologists who aren't retiring. To be competitive in the job market, many pathology residents have to do a fellowship and will have to be geographically VERY flexible.
As a former rads resident, I can tell you that rads residency is far from what people might think it is. it is tough. the amount of studying smoeone has to do with rads is brutal. call is brutal and anxiety provoking. as an attending you will have to work weekends, no question about it and nights unless nighthawk tem in place. you have patient encoutners not as often but still it's definitely far from lifestyle friendly. intelllectually i think it's one of the hardest specialites out there
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I remember in residency we'd have a radiologist come to our table rounds on Wednesdays and we'd show him interesting or difficult imaging from the previous week and have him talk to us about them. The dude sounded like an IM expert. He knew the pathology, disease progression, the treatment, AND how to read the films, CT/MRIs of what seemed like everything we threw at him. It was then that I realized radiology probably wasn't as easy as I thought it was.
OP, finish residency. Even if you don't ever practice after graduating. Push through it. You won't regret it. Trust me on this one.
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Is there a particular area of non-clinical work you are looking for advice on? Are you interested in staying in healthcare and doing something like IT or QI? Do you have a research background? Would you like a job that was 25% clinical and 75% something else? Did you have a different job before medical school that you liked more?
Right now you asked a very vague question that has a million different answers. Technically you can quit residency and go get a job at Starbucks and it would be non-clinical.
If you want useful advice you probably need to give a little bit more information regarding what you hate about your current residency and what you don't hate doing.
Right now you asked a very vague question that has a million different answers. Technically you can quit residency and go get a job at Starbucks and it would be non-clinical.
If you want useful advice you probably need to give a little bit more information regarding what you hate about your current residency and what you don't hate doing.
More and more it seems that people hate residency and medicine more and more. Don't blame them. I didn't like residency and thought about quitting countless times. If it weren't for my mother and then husband, I would have likely quit! But I'm glad I stuck it out. After a number of trial *and error* - with emphasis on the error! part, I found a very sweet gig, that is better than I could have imagined really. Very little to complain about. and I complain plenty! So life does indeed get better as an attending. And the higher up you get, the more comfortable life is. So my advice, for anyone who hates their residency - finish at least A residency. Opportunities are so much greater after one has finished - evne if there is 0 plan to do a single day of clinical work. Otherwise it's a very expensive and useless piece of toilet paper to have an MD or DO
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Because it's objectively a terrible decision from a financial perspective. So it's really, really important that one make sure that they absolutely positively cannot make it through residency without damaging their mental health before they quit. If the OP needs to quit then they need to quit, but we're all raising legitimate concerns.
It's come up a couple of times, but again it's worth finishing residency EVEN IF you want to do non-clinical because getting to say you are board-certified increases your earning potential substantially.
Not just that but also very few people will hire a physician who has not finished training. There is limited validity to hiring someone w essentially no clinical how to. I know of a number of people who couldn’t stand clinical medicine and quit and did non clinical and many did well but the common factor is that they all finished training and were able to market that.
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I came to this thread late. I just scanned though the all the postings. It doesn't seem that any one suggest working for an insurance company as the medical review doctor on insurance payment claims.
---Nice clean desk job with a M-F / 9 to 5 schedule
---Never, NEVER see a patient face to face and hear their BS.
---You trade hospital bureaucracy for corporate bureaucracy. (Corporate crap is at least different Crap.)
---Good to Very Good benefit package.
---As one of the few MD's in the place you may actually get some respect.
---The whole idea of being sued for a bad clinical decision disappears. (If you are involved in a legal issue the insurance company has an army of attorneys.)
---The Insurance company might just have a loan repayment program too.
---Nice clean desk job with a M-F / 9 to 5 schedule
---Never, NEVER see a patient face to face and hear their BS.
---You trade hospital bureaucracy for corporate bureaucracy. (Corporate crap is at least different Crap.)
---Good to Very Good benefit package.
---As one of the few MD's in the place you may actually get some respect.
---The whole idea of being sued for a bad clinical decision disappears. (If you are involved in a legal issue the insurance company has an army of attorneys.)
---The Insurance company might just have a loan repayment program too.
Yes but given the massive amount of doctors who have finished residency and are board certified 99.999999% of these jobs go to doctors who have finished training. What would a person who has not finished residency know about clinical criteria, etc? And most of these REQUIRE board certification.
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I didn't see where @Saddleshoes said anything about not finishing residency first.
Just mentioning this in general, it seems OP wants to quit residency and then someone else mentioned they did quit residency - so it kind of all flows.
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Not if one is paying attention.
Lol someone is a tough cranky cookie!
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Nah, just some small talk amongst ourselves until we hear back from the OP since they seem to have somewhat ghosted us. lol.
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I mean, when I do a peer review as a peds endo and have someone trained as a surgeon denying my claim... they don't know much about clinical criteria in my field either. Peer review is rarely truly 'peer'.
True, but if someone who has an MD/DO without any clinical training says "Dr Mvenus929" claim is rejected - you would likely be like what the heck?
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I say it regardless of who is on the other end of the phone.
I would expect nothing less
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I once had a reviewer who claimed to be an oncologist deny a patient a contralateral breast reconstruction at time of planned bilateral mastectomy. Would only approve reconstruction of the cancer side and claimed the law only mandated they cover the cancer side (it actually covers procedures for symmetry as well). The patient had to go back to surgery a second time to do the contralateral side. Ridiculous, and actually more expensive to the insurance company than doing it at the same time. Not to mention, more difficult for the plastic surgeon.
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Uhhh… yeah… I question allthe time when someone who has no clue about why they are rejecting what they are rejecting… and ask for their name and npi number, so I can add that to my note so the pt and anyone else that reads note who rejected the medication or imaging.
I also cite studies and guidelines on why my medical decision is valid… endocrinologists are nerdy like that…I have yet to have a P2P denied…and it’s generally not a peer…
I have to agree, and I have very rarely had a P2P denied. In fact I had a P2P recently when the insurance denied a patient's stay because the patient needed antibiotics for longer and I said ... well I certainly didn't think it would be medically safe or appropriate to send a patient with a purulent infection back home on oral antibiotics with no follow up, it would be very poor medical care and unsafe. The P2P said oh well that makes a lot of sense, how many more days do you need covered? Just let me know the days. When you make them feel bad and/or stupid, most P2P are overturned. It's such a hassle and waste though.
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I rarely know the exact background of the person I'm talking to, so if I feel that a therapy is indicated, I am like 'what the heck' regardless. I had one insurance deny approval of a GnRH agonist for precocious puberty because the bone age was congruent (it was actually advanced--the radiologist didn't read it correctly, as I stated in my note), and the LH "wasn't elevated" (it was in the puberty range... which is why I was applying for the GnRH agonist in the first place). It was overturned with P2P (though I personally didn't do the P2P due to a series of other issues). Insurances are in the business to make money and denying claims and making physicians (or their staff) appeal denials just gives them more time to get money.
Recently, I had insurance deny a claim for a medication and was about to get all fired up about it because as far as I was aware, it was the only medication in the class approved for pediatrics. Turns out, the alternative they suggested was approved in pediatrics about 4 months ago and was a less complicated regimen for my patient anyway. Win win.
Well let's be honest that there are physicians out there who do abuse the system so for those of us who are honest and are actually just trying to do right by our patients, it becomes problematic. I even recommend in the event that a P2P is denied that a patient/family call - in my specialty those frequently go through. It can certainly become a liability issue and I'm sure at some point continuing to deny becomes a problematic issue to defend. Persistence does tend to pay off.
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There's always teaching
Are you done with residency or still in residency?
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Take a careful look at my avatar, and underneath it.
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You're a cat??? I must say you hide it well.
Sorry the reply was meant for OP! My apologies.
No worries, we have entertained ourselves with no problem during your absence. Go save lives!
I will say that I felt Peds was far more malignant of a rotation with a lot of passive aggressive nonsense which I never understood. I think that outside of the very ill kiddos, I can imagine that clinic (from what I remember) must be boring - I would hate to deal with neurotic parents who bring their children for diarrhea and colds. That's what I remember most of my Peds clinic to be. I would imagine that being a specialist in Peds is far more exciting but then you are adding like 3 years or so to a specialty.
If you don't see yourself doing Peds I would say leave. It's hard to do but there are certain things about specialties that are the way they are. I. left Radiology. I hated it. Reading endless studies by myself, in a dark room with a bunch of (generally) dudes was hell. I am glad I did it. I generally speaking enjoy my current job - it was scary to change and I lost time - but 30 years of Radiology would have driven me to madness.
Everyone told me I was crazy to leave Rads - I disagreed, and prob best career move.
So if you hate it make a plan and leave. Peds is not like IM or FM - lots of non clinical options after those residencies. Peds is much harder. Does your wife work?
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It doesn't necessarily sound like you hate all of medicine as much as your program plus likely being in the wrong specialty. I know of several people who left peds to do anesthesia and were much happier. Have you looked for advanced programs that are looking for someone to start next year? You might be able to finish in just 3.5 more years. At least a few years ago a friend was able to have the first two years of peds residency meet the intern year requirements for an advanced anesthesia program. Is it too late to apply to this year's match?
Most PICU doctors that I know pretty much hated clinic clinic and didn't really like residency so you are not alone there. Being a resident in the PICU isn't much like being an attending. But at the same time the PICU is not daily procedures except at the busiest units where fellows are doing most of the procedures anyway. There is a lot less rounding in private practice if that works to you but there are a lot fewer private practice PICUs compared to say NICUs. Do you like your current ICU rotation other than the hours? If not it really sounds like you might be happier in a different specialty.
Most PICU doctors that I know pretty much hated clinic clinic and didn't really like residency so you are not alone there. Being a resident in the PICU isn't much like being an attending. But at the same time the PICU is not daily procedures except at the busiest units where fellows are doing most of the procedures anyway. There is a lot less rounding in private practice if that works to you but there are a lot fewer private practice PICUs compared to say NICUs. Do you like your current ICU rotation other than the hours? If not it really sounds like you might be happier in a different specialty.
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