Not very happy with location

[fulltilt]

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I have been a little depressed recently. I am attending a school where I feel quite out of place. I actually like the program and there are plenty of people that I can get along with in school. But I don't like how the area that I am in has little to offer me and med school seems to be taking over my life. Being an out-of-stater, I feel completely foreign to the surrounding. So it's difficult for me to find recreational avenues that are interesting to me.

I have found myself wishing desperately to be in a different place and I am only half way done with my first year. Whenever I imagine myself transferring to a school in a state that fits my personality and non-academic interests I feel insanely better. I am a very positive person and I usually take things in stride and enjoy the ride so I have been trying to tell myself that transferring is not an option and that I should though it out. I tell myself that I can do residency in a state that fits my personality a little better. But the same night I will dream about being at a school that can accommodate my non-academic interests better mostly because another 3.5 years here does not seem attractive at all. .

I am sure it would not even be possible for me to transfer since I don't have a "good" reason.

What should I do about feeling the way that I do?

Do any of you feel this way?

Ultimately, I think I need to be more aggressive in taking up hobbies outside of school where I can meet people with similar interests.

Feel free to PM me.

Constructive responses only please.

Thanks for your time.

 

[sscooterguy]

Hey, keep your head up. Many of us have been in this situation. First of all, do you care to share where you are? Maybe people reading this will have suggestions based on location. Also, what are you interested in?

In any case, I, as well as a few of my close friends now, felt the same way when we came to our school. We were used to very large cities with a lot of diversity, ethnic foods, and very open minded and active undergrads. I can remember feeling stuck in a place for four years as you do. However, it's my 4th year here, and I am beginning to miss it already. Near the end of my first year, I had met everyone in the class, and made good friends with many like minded people. From those people, and their friends, and others that I met, I started to find more and more nice places and activities to participate in. Where I was before (Ann Arbor), stuff just fell in my lap. Now, I have to go look for stuff, but in the years I've been here, I've found out there's a lot to do.

As you get busier and busier in medical school, you'll have less and less time to go out any ways. You'll have less time, and won't have enough opportunities to go out to all of the cool places that you find, so you'll start to appreciate and like them more.

In any case, I know transferring is hard, and I say give your location a shot. Depending on where you are, you can study your butt off during the week, and go on road trips on the weekends. Hang in there, it'll get better.

sscooterguy

 

[71263]

I have been a little depressed recently. I am attending a school where I feel quite out of place. I actually like the program and there are plenty of people that I can get along with in school. But I don't like how the area that I am in has little to offer me and med school seems to be taking over my life. Being an out-of-stater, I feel completely foreign to the surrounding. So it's difficult for me to find recreational avenues that are interesting to me.

I have found myself wishing desperately to be in a different place and I am only half way done with my first year. Whenever I imagine myself transferring to a school in a state that fits my personality and non-academic interests I feel insanely better. I am a very positive person and I usually take things in stride and enjoy the ride so I have been trying to tell myself that transferring is not an option and that I should though it out. I tell myself that I can do residency in a state that fits my personality a little better. But the same night I will dream about being at a school that can accommodate my non-academic interests better mostly because another 3.5 years here does not seem attractive at all. .

I am sure it would not even be possible for me to transfer since I don't have a "good" reason.

What should I do about feeling the way that I do?

Do any of you feel this way?

Ultimately, I think I need to be more aggressive in taking up hobbies outside of school where I can meet people with similar interests.

Feel free to PM me.

Constructive responses only please.

Thanks for your time.

Where do you go to school? My school is in the middle of nowhere, and I thought it would suck, coming from downtown chicago. But I realized that things worked out better this way since the isolation forces me to study and helps alot, esp during exam time.

 

[redstorm]

i actually left a big big city (3 million) to go to medical school in a small sized city. 300,000. I felt awful all the time. My first two years were very difficult. i was missing home. I made friends with other people who hated the place. one of them transferred I was not so lucky. But I slowly adapted and i think after my step1 exam I think i was well adjusted to the place. I went out all the time. i made many friends. and my social life was much much easier than it was in the big city. anyway i finished a while ago and left that medical school city but i still to this day have fond memories of it even though i was so lonely my first few years, even though the medical school was so malignant. so my advice is "hang in there" find other people who are equally lonely and hang with them and eventually you will find that "hey, th is is home"

 

[rockdoc]

I used to feel a lot like that last year... heck, I still do right now, especially since I'm home and about to leave for school again in a couple of days. My school's area is a complete opposite of what I'm used to. Outside of the school's student body, the city itself almost has no diversity, making me miss all of the different people, foods, and cultures back home.

It's not easy... it never is. But a lot of us just hang on and find ways to make the stay less painful. Personally, I've made wonderful friends in school who all share the same personalities, and we make jokes of how we're aching to move elsewhere. Sure, the jokes have some truth in them, but at least by talking about it with someone else, you know you're not alone. Also, I have even less time to myself now ever since starting the 2nd year, and being busy helps make time pass by much more quickly.

Just stay focused on what you're there for. Also, knowing that a lot of other people are going through the same exact thing should help ease what you're feeling. It may look like a long 3.5 years ahead, but believe me, at the very least, when you have more things to study for and less time to juggle them in, time will fly by. The friends you make in school should also help a lot, as you will able to share with them your feelings when you need to.

Good luck.

 

[DropkickMurphy]

Small city= 300,000 BAWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

 

[fun8stuff]

Small city= 300,000 BAWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

ha ha... that's what i was thinking... lol..

 

[bigdan]

OP-

Where are you going? If you feel that you administration is supportive, why not talk to them about whether they'll help you with a transfer. Not being happy IS a reason to transfer, in my book (but I'm no one).

If you have a place in mind, maybe you can also contact them and see what they have as a transfer process, and see if you can be facilitated that way.

Finally, before you make a move, be sure that it really is the location that is making you unhappy. Don't forget that you are (I'm assuming here) undergoing the most strenuous academic demands of your life. Changing everything in locale will not make that go away as long as you're in medical school.

I wish you the very best of luck with whatever you decide. Hang in there!

dc

 

[CTKN2]

I too understand what it's like to relocate to a small (well, they actually think it's a medium-sized city here, haha) city from out of state. I think it just takes time to get used to a place. I recently realized that there was a lot more stuff to do around here, when I was telling a medical school applicant what I liked to do outside of medical school. I still feel more comfortable in my home state, but I have learned to enjoy what there is to offer here.

I think sscooterboy gave a lot of good advice above about giving your location a shot. Transferring med schools is a big decision. Just think about whether you will feel comfortable transferring and whether you want to lose some of the cameradie that exists within a class you've been with from the first year. With that being said, I think that every individual case is different, and you should still do what you think is right for you. Good luck!

 

[BeBlessedMD]

I'm just happy to know I'm not alone. I love my school, and my classmates, but the location is killing me (as of right now). I'm trying to go back to my homestate for the research I plan on doing this summer, which will probably only make things worse, like being home for christmas break has done. I'm 24 yrs old, and I feel like a big baby for pouting, but DARRRRRRN it....I miss california 🙂. Gl to you all, and lets enjoy the blessing God has given us (being in med school!!!!).

 

[BooMed]

I moved from Oregon to the South almost two years ago, which is like moving to another country. I was crazy homesick for the first year--I thought about my hometown all of the time and constantly complained about life here. It's hard when the new place that you live is actually kind of lame, but making some new friends that I really like has helped me. Also, I started to notice good things about my new location, like how it doesn't rain for nine months straight and how friendly everyone is.

Try and stick it out, I promise the agony will gradually lessen. 🙂

 

[monstermatch]

There were a few whiny big city folk in my med school, always complaining about how crappy the town was. The rest of us got tired of it pretty fast. Get a life.

 

[gary5]

You seem disconnected. I would start by making new friendships at school. This is natural for many people yet difficult for others. Between classes, talk to the person to your right, to your left, etc, etc. Ask people to go to lunch together, to study together. Instead of focusing on what your environment isn't doing for you, focus on what you can do to connect. Reach out. It is only a wishful illusion that going somewhere else will be different. If you transfer to another school, you'll have to do the same things there.

 

[BooMed]

It is only a wishful illusion that going somewhere else will be different. If you transfer to another school, you'll have to do the same things there.

Very true.

 

[run4boston]

Thanks for starting this thread. I'm in the same boat. It's a little better now that I've been here a semester. I wish I were back home too. And, that's good. I appreciate what I had back home now more than ever.