Interesting... because that is exactly how I saw every vet talk with a client.. give the options for treatments, explain their effects, and prognoses, answer questions, give guidance, then produce treatment plans with the associated costs for the various treatments (of which as a tech I went over with the client).. if the client had any additional questions then the vet would answer them, guidance was provided but the ultimate decision as to what was done was that of the owner, not the vet in charge of the case and many times the owner did not choose what the vet would have considered the "best" option. The vet was simply a source of guidance and knowledge not a decision making factor (at least not to the point of the vet saying, "This is what we are going to do").
@julieDVM: I agree with this.
The vet I work for nearly had to have a client sign a release of liability because the client wanted to bring the animal home after a major oral surgery as opposed to doing what the vet recommended, which was have the animal stay overnight at one of the other local hospitals. The only reason the release ultimately did not have to be signed was because the owner's partner agreed with the vet and so the animal was brought for an overnight stay. The fact of the matter is, regardless of the vet's recommendation, and try she might to drive home how important it was that the cat be monitored (she explained the risks, the potential additional expenses, etc.), the owner did what the owner wanted to do in the end, and the vet couldn't sit there and rightly say, "sorry, I don't agree with that decision. Please do not come to collect your cat until I decide it's okay" had the owner's partner not been there to say so themself.
I am sure there are times, places and ways to say things, but I think that's an intuitive timing a lot of people lack. I had a veterinarian want to do extensive testing on my cat (this was when I was 12, but I remember this distinctly) when URI was a possibility for what was wrong. My mother asked if we could try a round of antibiotics, and if he didn't improve, we would go from there, as we had literally moved to our new home within the month and money was tight as a result of all the expenses we had incurred. We certainly did not plan for thousands that could be spent on veterinary testing! Lo and behold, my cat improved after a round of antibiotics and lived his remaining time with us very, very healthily. We never went back to that clinic, because when my mother asked about the antibiotics, the vet's response had been to shout and tell her she was condemning her daughter's cat to death and the cat's blood would be on my mother's hands, not hers. That's the least of the offenses she shouted, and I only wish my mother had reported her.
Veterinarians are not there to tell you what to do and then berate you when you don't do what they say. They are there to lay out all your options, answer as many questions as you have, and explain the various routes that you can take. Good veterinarians understand that clients are people, not just customers, that they have varying budgets, histories and experiences and that a veterinarian does not know enough about those experiences and budgets to demand that a client do x instead of y or z because x is the best option. That might be true, but sometimes you need a Plan B. SOV hit the nail on the head perfectly, as to what a good practioner should do and as to how a good practioner should conduct his or herself. Any veterinarian I know who has pushed treatments on their clients or made their clients feel poorly for not immediately going with Plan A has a very limited and/or unhappy client base based on the way they conduct themselves. The most popular clinicians in my area are clinicians that know how to work with a variety of people, because being a vet, as I'm sure you're well aware, is not all about working with the animals. It is about working with the people and knowing
how to work with those people. That means providing guidance but also understanding that you won't be approaching each client with a cookie cutter model. You are there to provide guidance, to provide thorough explanations, to answer questions, and yes, to say "I strongly suggest" or "I would recommend" or "if it were my animal...", but you are not there to dictate decisions that ultimately come down to the person you don't know enough about to make those decisions in the first place.
My .02 and to build off DVMDream's and SOV's excellent points.
