Protecting anonymity on SDN

[psychwanabe]

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I have been pondering something and thought I would put it to you all for opinions.

Where do you draw the line when deciding what to say about yourself and your situation when posting on SDN? It seems clear that keeping names, specific locations, etc. private is a good move. But what about other information? Do you think it is unwise to list the names of schools where you have sent applications or where you are interviewing? What about the name of your undergrad institution? I really didn’t give it any thought when I came here the first time – but then I’m just one who generally blurts things out anyway! After a while, I wondered if I was saying too much.

I think advice from some of you who’ve been here for a while (or who have experiences from other forums) would be valuable to those people who are visiting/posting for the first time.

 

[RayneeDeigh]

Well, I'm one of those people that is just an open book no matter how hard I try not to be. I always forget to be mysterious.

I do think about who may read what I say, so I try to be nice to people. lol

 

[chaos]

hmm I've never really worried about it. I go to a huge school so I doubt anyone would know who I am. Once you're actually in grad school I guess you have to be careful...if you mention the name of your school someone could easily guess who you are. But as long as you don't say stuff like 'omg my advisor is a complete charlatan and I'm thinking of slipping large amounts of laxatives into the coffee s/he makes me fetch every morning' you're probably ok.

I'm not the type to take any 'reputation' or 'status' I might gain too seriously, so I really don't care who knows that I have a deranged sense of humor and spend my free time posting funny pictures of cats on random internet forums.

 

[irish80122]

I honestly have never been secretive on here, and a lot of people know who I am (it isn't hard to find my picture if you look). I haven't had it bite me yet, and really I never worried about it to much. I think you are safe saying where you applied to school and also saying where you received interviews because that really doesn't identify you. You may want to be a bit more careful with saying which school is you first choice or something like that on here, but other than that I don't think it is a big deal.

I don't mind if people know who I am on here because, for the most part, if I say something on here that would get me in trouble it is because I am doing something I shouldn't, you know? That doesn't mean everything I post on this board I am proud of, I have a couple posts I am not, but it is 99.9% fine and I am alright with people knowing who I am. That is just me though. It also is easy for me to say now that I am done with the application process 🙂.

I guess the best advice is share what you are comfortable in sharing, and if you think it is iffy, private message the person you are talking with. Be aware that advisors do read these boards, so watch what you say. I think it swings both ways though. I hope that my presence on this board has shown that I am passionate about psychology and my research and want to help others. As long as I am doing that, I don't care who sees it 🙂.

That was a bit scatter-brained but I hope it helped some.

 

[psychwanabe]

lol, love the cat!

I'm not worried about reputation or status or anything like that. But, for example, when someone posts about frustration with their current advisor or program (as most of us have at some point), how careful we should be? Even vague references can be identified if the reader knows you. I'm at a big school too, but the psych dept. is a pretty small world. I have a friend in undergrad who read some of these threads and knew immediately who I was!

Maybe it's just that I am new to posting on public forums and I'm just being cautious.

 

[irish80122]

lol, personally I don't plan on venting about my grad school profs on here. IF I do that anywhere, and I probably won't, it would be on a blog. I am hoping, given where I selected, that there won't be too much venting required!

 

[tkj]

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[tkj]

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[Lunabin]

This is a good topic, and I'd like to hear from others already in grad school...

As is clear from my posts - I'm in my 5th year, and noticed that part of the training is (indirectly) a lesson in articulation and 'professional communication.' (I'm fumbling this now... I hope this ends up making sense) For example, you learn to be critical without pissing anyone off (unless that's your intention of course 🙂 ).

I personally find that I do withhold some, just because I'm in neuropsych, which is really a very small circle of folks. But, I don't say or not say anything I wouldn't to any other colleague. I don't dish like I would to my husband or friends, but I certainly don't misrepresent myself either.

I would be interested if anyone on here actually did know me...

 

[spyspy]

I'm keeping as anonymous as possible. Potential advisors and DCTS do read this site. I really want to talk about my research, but it's very specialized and would "give me away" to anyone who I've applied to work with.

To each his/her own, but for me...I'm keeping it quiet.

 

[NeuroPsyStudent]

Well, someone has to reveal something or we have no site! I often forget that there are passive lurkers. I suppose there are more silent readers than participants.

 

[chaos]

Potential advisors and DCTS do read this site.

Well then they should make themselves useful and give us some advice on getting accepted instead of skulking around. 😛

 

[psychwanabe]

I personally find that I do withhold some, just because I'm in neuropsych, which is really a very small circle of folks. But, I don't say or not say anything I wouldn't to any other colleague. I don't dish like I would to my husband or friends, but I certainly don't misrepresent myself either.

I guess this is my thing. I am an "out there" kind of person. I don't withhold who I am regardless of who I am speaking with - be they friends, professors or department heads. It feels so chummy in here that I have to remind myself that my words are out there for the world to read. I have my natural tendencies to bitch about something, but there are *a few* more people that may be listening in here than in my little wing at school! 😳

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

I think there is definitely a balance. With the advent of google, anonymity has definitely gotten harder. I definitely ask myself if anything I post would embarrass myself or otherwise be negative if someone in my professional life read it. There is a possibility they may have read it too! With that being said, I think it is a good opportunity to interact with other professionals.

-t

 

[irish80122]

Well, someone has to reveal something or we have no site! I often forget that there are passive lurkers. I suppose there are more silent readers than participants.

I talked with a lot of SDN users at interviews who knew me and every single one of them was a passive user. I think there are far more passive users than active users, which is unfortunate. Also, as you can tell by my post count, I think being passive would drive me nuts!

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

I talked with a lot of SDN users at interviews who knew me and every single one of them was a passive user. I think there are far more passive users than active users, which is unfortunate. Also, as you can tell by my post count, I think being passive would drive me nuts!

Agreed.

I came across quite a few. Who knows....maybe YOU (the lurker who is reading this but hasn't posted) met me.

-t

 

[paramour]

lol, love the cat!

I'm not worried about reputation or status or anything like that. But, for example, when someone posts about frustration with their current advisor or program (as most of us have at some point), how careful we should be? Even vague references can be identified if the reader knows you. I'm at a big school too, but the psych dept. is a pretty small world. I have a friend in undergrad who read some of these threads and knew immediately who I was!

Maybe it's just that I am new to posting on public forums and I'm just being cautious.

Not so sure I'm worried about my current program reading anything I've posted--mainly because I probably already tell them more than they want to hear anyway, gripes & all. Additionally, the majority of the profs (not all) in our dept are somewhat computer illiterate. Word processing and email is about as far as they go--One of the profs only got a PC within the last couple o' years because he refused to touch a computer.

hehe, 'sides, I absolutely, positively love my program. I would recommend them to anyone & everyone. You can get no better than this. [Insert positive, wonderful compliment here!] 😉

 

[paramour]

I'm the same as irish I guess...I have about 0 anonymity here and never really thought to try and cover my identity (I think it's more fun this way...you can shout at me if you meet me in real life! Some people have actually shoulder tapped me because of this forum / my blog...haha)

In real life, I try never to back talk someone and I make a point of not doing that on the internet. If something I write gets me in trouble, then I was probably going to get in trouble for it anyway since I write the way I talk

Glad I'm not the only one--If I gripe here about something, I've typically already complained about it to everyone else so it's not like it would be news to 'em.

 

[paramour]

Well then they should make themselves useful and give us some advice on getting accepted instead of skulking around. 😛

Nice. Now we need some of 'em to come on here complaining about their horrid students . . . only for one of us to learn that it's us that they're talking about.

 

[RayneeDeigh]

I'm kind of an oddball anyway, so the sooner people know this, the sooner we can move on to more important things.

 

[psychwanabe]

I talked with a lot of SDN users at interviews who knew me and every single one of them was a passive user. I think there are far more passive users than active users, which is unfortunate. Also, as you can tell by my post count, I think being passive would drive me nuts!

Right - me too! (I seem to be saying that a lot in here). And this is part of my problem. It's hard for me not to chime in and then, whoa Nelly! I think sometimes I should get some virtual tape to put over my virtual mouth.

Not so sure I'm worried about my current program reading anything I've posted--mainly because I probably already tell them more than they want to hear anyway, gripes & all. Additionally, the majority of the profs (not all) in our dept are somewhat computer illiterate. Word processing and email is about as far as they go--One of the profs only got a PC within the last couple o' years because he refused to touch a computer.

It is about my current program that I have to censor myself. It's been stressful, and difficult for me there lately. I want to scream it all to the world, but I try not to. I'm sure part of it is the stress that I and others at my program are under due to workload/application process, etc. I want to "tell on" the people I'm frustrated by (it's the 5 year-old in me coming out 😳), but I am trying not to be a complete bone-head about it. I guess part of the impetus for this thread is the question "how much is too much?"

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

Not so sure I'm worried about my current program reading anything I've posted--mainly because I probably already tell them more than they want to hear anyway, gripes & all.

Ditto.



I'm well known in a number of circles, it isn't hard for colleagues to figure out who I am; I'm a believer in networking and name recognition. That being said, it is all still balancing what to share and where.

-t

 

[WalkerTR]

I suppose if you really wanted to vent it wouldn't be too hard to create an alter ego and post your true feelings. I don't know of anyone who actually does this... really.

 

[Ollie123]

Anyone who had any contact with me at any of the 3 schools I interviewed at probably knows exactly who I am from my posts. I've never been good at the whole anonymity thing (I share information too readily), but I also tend not to say particularly offensive things so I'm not terribly worried. If I ever need to bitch about my school or mentors, I'll figure something out. For now, everyone I have met so far at my school has been wonderful so hopefully it won't be an issue🙂

Nice to know I'm not the only "open book" type here, I think we're a rarity in real life. It certainly wrecked absolute havoc in my personal life for a few years because most people are confused and/or freaked out by people who are just blunt and open.

 

[Ella_Mental]

Quite a few people on SDN have seen me at interviews. I am not overly anonymous. However, when I give feedback or opinions it is only about applying to schools, jobs 🙂beat: ), reputations, etc. Those discussions, in my opinion, are relatively 3rd person.

Additionally, I do not think this forum, and the Internet in general, is appropriate for talking about advisors, your school-related woes, colleagues, clients and other things of that nature.

*ella

 

[CheetahGirl]

No one knows for sure who I am and I'd deny it 😉 SDN? What's that?

Ha! I agree. I'll PM anyone and reveal myself, but since opinions are like a$$holes, and everyone has one...anonymity adds a certain “je ne sais quoi.” 😛

 

[mshheaddoc]

I talked with a lot of SDN users at interviews who knew me and every single one of them was a passive user. I think there are far more passive users than active users, which is unfortunate. Also, as you can tell by my post count, I think being passive would drive me nuts!

I agree with this point. I wish more users were "out" when it comes to the use of SDN but I think also that the stigma associated with "internet memberships" are also out there. As in any public forum you have to watch what is said. Many users know me and its not that hard to find out much about me.

I respect those who wish to remain anonymous for various reasons but I wish more people were active in some regards when it came to location. They might know valuable information but are too afraid to come out and mention it (such as in applications process/school interviews, etc).

I know I'm not a regular member of this forum but I stumbled across this thread and I just had to post in it. 😳

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

I know I'm not a regular member of this forum but I stumbled across this thread and I just had to post in it. 😳

Who left the forum door open?!! We don't want this kind of riff-raff and rabble-rousing coming into our forum.



(I completely agree with you, btw)

-t

 

[spyspy]

Oh no -- an intruder! 😱

I think the basis for one's desire for anonymity might be somewhat related to his or her research area and client base.

 

[Neuro-Dr]

I think the issue is more of "why you choose to do something" rather than the action itself. I am on several professional listserves and these are open. It is helpful on these to know where the opinion is coming from and seek specific people for advice and discussion when needed. The cost is getting the "stink eye" at conferences when you have some argument on the lists.

I think the upside of anonymity is that you can be more honest in your opinion at such times when you would not ordinarily be able to do so without reprisals. I find that most people just don't share anything when the topic is provocative and if it becomes too hot the moderator just slams the door to keep people from dropping off the list. This is less likely to happen in an anonymous format.

 

[psychwanabe]

Anyone who had any contact with me at any of the 3 schools I interviewed at probably knows exactly who I am from my posts. I've never been good at the whole anonymity thing (I share information too readily), but I also tend not to say particularly offensive things so I'm not terribly worried. If I ever need to bitch about my school or mentors, I'll figure something out. For now, everyone I have met so far at my school has been wonderful so hopefully it won't be an issue🙂

Nice to know I'm not the only "open book" type here, I think we're a rarity in real life. It certainly wrecked absolute havoc in my personal life for a few years because most people are confused and/or freaked out by people who are just blunt and open.

You are right about that! I also tend to be very blunt. I have learned diplomacy and tact, however I don't prevaricate: this can really put people off. I have met/worked with/worked for a lot of people who play games. I have NO patience for this. I also am one to stand up for myself: if I want something, I ask for it! The worst that happens is that someone says "no" and then I am right back where I started, I haven't lost anything. I can't stand people who won't ask for what they want, won't ask for help from others, and then they whine and complain that they never get what they want, and never get any help!

*ends rant, wonders "what was the point of this post...?"*

 

[Ollie123]

Ranting is a point in and of itself😉
Some people seem to think blunt and tact are mutually exclusive but I disagree. You can be truthful and not beat around the bush without being an ass about it.
I'll let anyone know if they are doing something wrong in the lab, or if I think there is a better way to do something. This includes the PI. I'll say "If we do it x way, y may happen. If we do that z way, we avoid that". Both blunt, and tactful. Fortunately, my current supervisor is supportive of that, but in the past, I have had some who were not.

I won't even delve into how utterly freaked out the female population in my area gets when you ask them out on a date instead of meeting them, then ignoring them, then flirting, then inviting them out with a group, then not talking to them for 2 months biding time for when both are drunk at a party Being straightforward gets you nowhere with most folks!

Fortunately, the worthwhile people appreciate it🙂

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

I won't even delve into how utterly freaked out the female population in my area gets when you ask them out on a date instead of meeting them, then ignoring them, then flirting, then inviting them out with a group, then not talking to them for 2 months biding time for when both are drunk at a party

Priceless.

-t

 

[psychwanabe]

Ranting is a point in and of itself😉.

Thanks! I felt better anyway!

Some people seem to think blunt and tact are mutually exclusive but I disagree. You can be truthful and not beat around the bush without being an ass about it.
I'll let anyone know if they are doing something wrong in the lab, or if I think there is a better way to do something. This includes the PI. I'll say "If we do it x way, y may happen. If we do that z way, we avoid that". Both blunt, and tactful. Fortunately, my current supervisor is supportive of that, but in the past, I have had some who were not.

I used to have blunt with no tact but I work very hard at maintaining tact now. It's hard sometimes!

I won't even delve into how utterly freaked out the female population in my area gets when you ask them out on a date instead of meeting them, then ignoring them, then flirting, then inviting them out with a group, then not talking to them for 2 months biding time for when both are drunk at a party Being straightforward gets you nowhere with most folks!

Fortunately, the worthwhile people appreciate it🙂

While sometimes my husband is more straightforward than I would prefer (occasionally it would be nice to just be humored 🙄 ), I would SO rather have that than the opposite!

I had a prof once who said: "You're growing on me [psychwanabe], I don't know if it's like a sweet flower or a thorny bush!"

People who know me well think it's one of the best ways of summing me up!

 

[paramour]

Ranting is a point in and of itself😉
Some people seem to think blunt and tact are mutually exclusive but I disagree. You can be truthful and not beat around the bush without being an ass about it.
I'll let anyone know if they are doing something wrong in the lab, or if I think there is a better way to do something. This includes the PI. I'll say "If we do it x way, y may happen. If we do that z way, we avoid that". Both blunt, and tactful. Fortunately, my current supervisor is supportive of that, but in the past, I have had some who were not.

I won't even delve into how utterly freaked out the female population in my area gets when you ask them out on a date instead of meeting them, then ignoring them, then flirting, then inviting them out with a group, then not talking to them for 2 months biding time for when both are drunk at a party Being straightforward gets you nowhere with most folks!

Fortunately, the worthwhile people appreciate it🙂

My prof absolutley loves me & my bluntness--he tells me that I say the things that he wants to say to the twits o' the group but can't. Not sure what he's going to do when I'm gone.

 

[LosingMyMind]

It's interesting that this thread was started up just as I really began thinking about this issue. I mean... it would be easy (arguably too much so) to know who I am from my posts. But is that really a problem? I have made connections within the field in general and my specific little area by my talking on an on about myself. Those connections, and the ones I hope to continue to make, make the line of caution concerning information seem further away. As people have already said, I don't intend to ever fill up the forum bad-mouthing my program or advisor or other students, professors, etc. That's just bad form, even in an anonymous post.

And, as has also been previously stated, I would try to sell up my program to anyone willing to listen. I think its fantastic and I'm more than eager to go on and on and be some sort of free advertisement!

Just another opinion...

 

[Duckygirl]

I don't feel the need to be terribly anonymous on SDN, although, I have to also think that in light of all the information I've freely given away- I still don't think most people would know who I was in real life. I think I'm pretty removed:
I'm not in school anymore, and I applied mostly to programs that have a high number of applicants. I'm not in close contact with anyone who applied for doctoral programs in psychology. I went to a small liberal arts college and never had the opportunity to work with any "big players" in the field. Most of the clinicians I work with now have had their degrees for 15-20 years and none of them teach. All of the interviews I went to had a multitude of applicants there, and I never met everyone I saw on interview day. I can't even say that I ran into anyone else who was an identified SDNer.

I can see that anonymity is important for people whose circumstances would be compromising, like others earlier in the year who had to keep quiet because they'd received a fellowship and been accepted for admission long before others, and the school had asked for the information to remain secret. I can also see that if you are studying a very narrow area of the field, you might want to keep it quiet. But at the same time, as others have said, as long as you aren't bad-mouthing or saying slanderous things, what difference would that make?

I would also agree that there HAVE to be lots and lots more passive SDN readers than active ones. I don't really understand reading SDN all the time and NEVER getting the bug to chime in. I think when it comes to interview offers/acceptances/rejections- why the hell not share? It is what having a forum is all about. It helps other people gauge their situations, and sometimes it even helps! If you've been rejected by a school and you post your rejection online...I highly doubt you are compromising anything. What could happen? A school figures out you posted your rejection and then they come after you and say, "No, no- you shouldn't have posted this online, this time you are REALLY rejected!!!" I don't think so. Or conversely (I'm laughing outloud as I'm writing this...) imagine:

University Blah Blah: "So-and-so, we've heard word that you posted your acceptance to our program on SDN. So...we're going to have to let you go..."

SDNer: "WHAT?!? You're kidding me...I thought I was in!"

University Blah Blah: "NOpe...we're going to have to take back that assistantship, and you've lost your spot. It's absolutely absurd that you would ever share your acceptance to our program. Having the rest of the country know that we actaully accept people to our clinical psych program definitely compromises our selectivity and competitiveness."

SDNer: "Dang. Isn't there anything I can do?!?"

University Blah Blah: "I'm sorry. University Blah Blah just isn't for community-oriented folks like yourself. We're going to take one of those passive lurkers from SDN who won't tell a soul."

 

[psychwanabe]

too funny Duckygirl! I especially like the name of your University 😀