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Question for med students from a pre-med

Discussion in 'Medical Students - MD' started by gmendese, Nov 4, 2001.

  1. gmendese

    gmendese Porn Star 7+ Year Member

    I'm just curious as to how much time will actually be devoted to medical school. I know it varies from person to person, but will my girlfriend end up resenting me because I'm gone so much? I know this question may sound naive, but if you could help I would really appreciate it. Thank you.
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  3. arthur v

    arthur v Member 7+ Year Member

    Oct 29, 2001
    It's not a naive question at all - it's actually very important. Many local as well as long distance relationships are strained by one partner or the other entering medical school. Divorces, break-ups, and affairs are an all-too-common occurence as a result of this. There are many factors involved, but perhaps the three most important are:

    1) Your dedication to each other. You may decide to get married during medical school as a way to strengthen your bond, or you may wait until you graduate, but either way, if your relationship endures through medical school and your intern year, you've got a keeper.

    2) How bright are you? There are those individuals who can grasp a concept on first introduction, those who need to reinforce it multiple times, and those who can get by with practice questions without really understanding the underlying principles. If you're in the first category, medical school will be a breeze and provide you lots of free time in your first two years. What you do with that free time is up to you. You can use it and become a gunner, setting yourself up as a competitive candidate for highly-desirable residencies, or you can use it to chill, still make good grades, spend time with your significant other, and still be in contention for decent residencies. If you're in the second category, you will still have a life, but it will put a strain on your relationship because you will be using most of your free time to study. If you're in the latter category, you will have quite a bit of free time, but you will underperform in your courses and examinations, limiting how good of a residency you will eventually get. Of course, if this is of no concern to you (i.e. you plan to enter small, community programs in family practice, internal medicine, psychiatry, pediatrics, or pathology), then your only fear will be receiving a failing grade. The last two years of medical school are like a full-time job, in that you have little control of how much time you spend in the hospital. However, depending on which rotation you're on (surgery=long hours; psychiatry=office hours), you should have time to spend with your S.O. You will, however, be tired during your off-time.

    3) How competitive is your medical school? If you go to a lesser known, primary care-focused school, you will have more time, as you won't be treading water to stay afloat with the big dogs. If you go to a very academic medical school (i.e. the professors lecture to you on their soon to be published molecular biology research), your time will evaporate.

    In summary, discuss all of these issues with your S.O., but understand that until you live through them, all the talk in the world won't matter. Just hope for the best, and life will play itself out. Good luck.

  4. gmendese

    gmendese Porn Star 7+ Year Member

    Thank you SO much for your reply. You've helped a lot!
  5. ithica20

    ithica20 Junior Member 10+ Year Member

    Mar 17, 2001
    boulder, co
    just so you know it's tough but doable. i got married and had a daughter right before going to med school. we have a baby at home and i study a lot, but life is good. i just don't go party at the bars with the other students, i'm a stay at home dad when not at school. in short, if i can do it with an infant at home and have a good realtionship with my wife, you'll be just fine. med school has cycles of bad times like before a gross exam when you're busy, then "down times" and you just gotta not take those for granted and spend time with your s.o.
  6. Whisker Barrel Cortex

    Whisker Barrel Cortex 1K Member 10+ Year Member

    Aug 10, 2001
    Although I am not married and don't have kids, I can attest that you will have enough time during most of medical school for your family (except maybe surgery and OB/GYN rotations). I just wanted to make sure you realize that medical education does not end with med school. The hours you will work during residency will in almost all specialties be much much longer than in medical school. Maybe if you do path or rads it won't be as bad. I know its still managable since I have residents with families. Just thought you should include that in your decision making.
  7. Whisker Barrel Cortex

    Whisker Barrel Cortex 1K Member 10+ Year Member

    Aug 10, 2001
    Oops, I just saw that you were talking about a girlfriend, not family. The same goes for girlfriends though (depending on how demanding she is).
  8. gmendese

    gmendese Porn Star 7+ Year Member

    I just wanted to thank all of you for your responses. I wasn't sure anyone would respond at all. But you've made me feel much better about everything. People in general (usually not associated with the medical field) tell me, "Oh, your relationship will be so tough...blah blah". And they tell my girlfriend that she'll be alone all the time and our relationship will fall apart. I know it varies from person to person but I just wanted to hear from a medical student's mouth, what I sort of knew all along. Thanks a lot!

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