Well the racial comments continued again today as I had expected. I stressed over this all last night about how I was going to approach this. Another racial comment he made yesterday was while I was doing a thoracic epidural with the upper level resident, he was mentioning how I always direct the needle superiorly and it might actually be to my benefit in a thoracic epidural. The attending then went on to say that "yeah chinese people always overcompensate". This was yesterday before I posted my original message and again I tried to laugh it off.
This morning at breakfast as we were leaving the cafeteria somehow he felt compelled to tell the student nurse anesthetist that "yeah yesterday I was saying how the chinese over compensate", off of a totally unrelated subject. The student nurse had no idea was he was talking about and there was an uncomfortable silence. I then politely went on to say that yeah he's making another uncomfortable joke. He tried to justify what he said by saying he was in a "very multicultural fraternity in college" where there was a Japanese guy who they always joke with and there was no limit to what they would joke about, I'm sure race related. I didn't pursue the matter further and had hoped that my comment about his uncomfortable joke would make him stop.
Later that day I was doing another thoracic epidural and at the end of the procedure he again make an off color remark about the chinese in front of the patient, RN, the upper level resident, and a nursing student. This time I didn't let it slide and called him out as a racist. The RN who was holding the patient for me asked me what he was talking about, and I said "He's making another racial joke again. He always does this when I am doing a procedure. It might have been funny the first couple of times but he keeps making these racial jokes and now it's just getting offensive." She agreed with me and said yeah I'm sure it gets old after awhile. There was another uncomfortable silence in the room as I was taping up the patient.
I wasn't sure whether he got the message; so as me, the upper level resident, and the racist attending were heading back upstairs waiting for the elevator, I said "Yeah I don't appreciate these racial comments anymore, they are not funny and are starting to get offensive". He started getting really defensive and raised his voice in agitation and said "Yes I heard you the first time! It's ok just drop it!" My response to this was "No I am not going to drop this because this is not right. This needs to stop because I don't want this to happen again to anyone else, it's inappropriate and unprofessional especially in front of the patient and staff...." He again raised his voice to an anger yell now, cut me off and said "I SAID JUST DROP IT, IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN, YOU WON'T HEAR ANOTHER WORD. MY PARENTS ARE FROM POLAND AND ITALY SO I AM NOT RACIST, SO LET'S JUST DROP IT". I tried to finish what I had started saying but I felt like I was pushing the envelope and don't think I could have rebuttled with anything else without it escalating into something physical. So finally I said FINE.
I believe that his behavior was very immature, especially the fact that when I tried to confront him he basically completely shut down and did not want to discuss things like an adult in a professional manner. While I really wanted to give him a piece of my mind I did not want to jeopardize my career and risk me completely losing my temper and doing something I regret. This whole exchange occurred with the upper level resident present and he witnessed everything including most of the other racist jokes he has made in the past.
While we were back upstairs I was still pretty upset and was talking to the upper level resident about what just happened in the elevator and he apologized to me, even though he has taken no part in these jokes. I also told the SRNA about what happened downstairs and she also agreed that the racial jokes were starting to get old. I took comfort from the fact that my upper level apologized to me meaning that he too thought all the racial jokes were inappropriate.
I truly believe this attending is racist. He is from a small town in Alabama, also he was in the ROTC just so that he didn't have to pay for medical school. He also asked me about a week ago when I first told him I was from Hong Kong "so if America were to goto war with china which side would you be fighting on?" I thought that was a really uncomfortable question. First of all when I was still living in Hong Kong as a kid it was still part of Great Britain, but after 1997 it was turned back over to China. I'm not sure he understands this. Plus I am an American citizen, spent the past 17 years of my live in the US, so my first response was well I went into the health profession hoping that I will never have to fight anyone of any nationality. He didn't let the issue go and pressed on to say "no but seriously what if you weren't in the health profession and we were at war with china?" I said since I am a US citizen I would fight for the US and not for China, which Hong Kong was not a part of when I moved to the US. I just thought that was a really uncomfortable question and that was pretty much the beginning of all these racial comments about me being a chinese guy. Later that day he told the SRNA "good news, we figured out that our resident will be fighting on our side if we ever goto war with china." He could not see anything else past my outter appearance of black hair and black eyes, but only a chinese guy who "we flew in from china to work for us", another comment he made to a patient. It also really bothered me that he never apologized for his actions after I confronted him. It seems he thought it was ok to make all those racist comments.
I don't think I can change the way this attending is who is now in his late 40s and has the maturity of a 13 year old. Further argument with him would be fruitless. I am thinking about writing a letter of complaint to my chairman and program director about what happened, so at least if he gives me a bad evaluation they would know the true reason why. Also our chairman is a big advocate about cultural sensitivity and actually made all the 2nd year residents take a medical spanish course, so hopefully he would understand and will be on my side.
I really hope this won't put a bad mark on me when I need to ask them for letters when I apply for fellowships/jobs. I just don't want to give them the impression that I am difficult to work with or worse yet a troublemaker. I don't have any intention of destroying this attending's career, and I'm sure he can find a job somewhere else anyway. I do want to make him realize that what he did was wrong and to prevent this from occurring again to any other minority residents working under him.
I hope I dealt with the situation as professionally as I could. I used my values and what I felt was right and confronted him. I may have prevented him from future racial harrassment of minority residents, but I'm sad to say that he will likely stay racist the rest of his life and no one can change that. It disappoints me that in such educated professions like medicine there are people like these who are totally insensitive, probably many more who have the same mentality but just not as ignorant as to say it in the open.
Anyway 2 more days left on the rotation, if he makes another racist comment to me he might end up on the news. But I am really glad that I confronted him today