Relationships in Medical School...Noooooo!

[Futuremd03]

For those of you that are entering medical school this fall, congrats! Now the real work begins. You will have more than enough to keep you busy so I will give you the best advice that you can't find in any First Aid series... Do not date your classmate!
This would be a great mistake. I know because I did engage in a brief relationship with a classmate. She was a great, friendly, brilliant woman when we were "getting to know each other". My class found great joy in treating our relationship like their own personal soap opera so you readers are probably guessing that they helped screw it all up. Simple lunches with my female study partners turned into cheating... along with other idiotic fabrications. This goes on all during Medical Physiology and Neuroanatomy. It is amazing that I could focus long enough to get out of first year with some respectable grades. But, I guarantee that some of my sanity is left behind while trying to smooth out a dying relationship and relating the Spinothalamic pathway. Well, youre wondering how things turned out. Even though i have expressed my profound wishes to remain friends, my former mate does not speak to me and neither do her friends. My study partners and friends in the class have divided into their own warring factions and do not really speak either. So, very little medicine can be learned in a high stress situation like this. Do not...I repeat...do not engage in any type of relationship(other than friendship with a classmate) with a classmate. It is not worth it no matter how incredibly beautiful and intellectual they are. If you must date in your med school, date an upperclassman. You won't have to look at them everyday...EVERYDAY! in case things do go sour. Once again, congrats to the entering class of 2004...you only have 4 years to determine the rest of your life...a relationship will be there...Good luck and God bless!

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[turtleboard]

Relationships here are sometimes the subject of time-wasting gossip talk in the library, but I'm not sure if anyone takes it to the level you're speaking of.

That's pretty wild, but it's an excellent example to underscore this important point for entering first-years: You won't have the same privacy and possible anonymity you enjoyed in college. In med school everyone knows everyone else's business.


Tim of New York City.

 

[---123]

There's an old expression: "Don't $hit where you eat." I think your experience, and that of countless others, bears that out. If anyone had any doubts, they'd do well to listen

[This message has been edited by ---123 (edited 05-27-2000).]

 

[Pilot]

I don't know that dating an upperclassman is such a great idea either. Wouldn't you love to end the relationship, and then follow the ex through residency... The potential for revenge would be huge.. Just my humble opinion.. Pilot

 

[ryanpj]

does that exclude a mutual friendship in which the friends help relieve sexual tensions?

 

[darly]

Here's another one... if you are premed and your current SO is a premed, don't apply to only the schools he/she is applying to. Then you'll be stuck with him/her for the next four years. I've definitely learned my lesson. Futuremd03... Thanks for your advice. Where do you suggest we meet other potential mates though. Upperclassmen are out for me because that would get into my ex's territory.

Also, I am currently seeing someone but because of prior experience with a long distance relationship (see the ex above), I am not sure if it will work. I think I've become a bit more mature since the last relationship (hopefully), but I don't want to create any bitterness between us. I don't know if it's really worth the energy, but he's a really good person. If anyone has any comments/suggestions, please feel free to reply.

 

[Carp]

Sage wisdom from Rowlf the Dog:

Rowlf the Dog: Stay away from women, that's my motto.
Kermit the Frog: But I can't.
Rowlf the Dog: Neither can I: that's my trouble.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rowlf the Dog: [singing] You can't live with 'em, you can't live without 'em. / There's something irrestibilish about 'em. / We grin and bear it because the nights are long. / I hope that something better comes along.

 

[potrzebie]

Lots of people meet future spouses during medical school. Do not exclude classmates a priori -- you could be shunning your perfect mate.

 

[Tigger Tiger]

Why does everyone seem to think that they will find their 'mate' in medicine?

Broaden your horizons! Find someone from a different area of study, lest dinner time conversation is reduced to lesions and case studies.