1. Wear deodorant; This is a cultural issue as opposed to a hygeine issue. There is a misconception that Indians don't bathe and are unclean which is an offensive and false notion. People in India wear talcum powder as opposed to deodorant but powder doesn't work as well as deodorant. So please purchase deodorant such as a can of Right Guard aerosal and apply it after you shower in the morning.
2. Wear dark socks with dark shoes such as black leather shoes. Don't wear white socks with dark shoes to work.
3. Don't wear bright colors like pink and turquoise blue shirts. Purchase conservative colors like white, black and khaki.
4. Don't wear white sneakers with khaki pants and other business casual clothes. If you are going to wear khakis and a polo shirt, wear conservative black or brown leather shoes not Reeboks.
5. Learn to tip well. Indians are bad tippers by American standards. I realize this is a cultural distinction because in many foreign countries, tipping is not required like it is here. Standard tipping should be 15% for average service, 20% for good service and 10% for weak service. If they are rude to you, don't tip at all.
6. Become friends with non-Indians. I know it's convenient to surround yourselves with only Indian people but attain some non-Indian friends. It will teach you a lot about this country and provide you with a different perspective on life. You will also educate those people and give them exposure to Indian culture therebye helping to spread tolerance and a greater understanding of our culture.
7. Don't be late! Try to be 10 minutes early to everything. Americans hate tardiness. If you are late a few times they will immediately label you as being someone who doesn't show up on time. If you are running late, always call the people on your cell phone and inform them that you will be running 5-10 minutes late.
8. Edit your written documents. Before sending an e-mail out, make sure you add all the proper articles or have a friend look at it first before sending it out. If it's a formal document, make sure to read over it a few times and correct the mistakes. It used to drive me crazy to read cave man english in e-mails from otherwise brilliant people.
9. Dancing tips: Don't occupy too much space on the dance floor at night clubs or discos. Don't flail your arms and occupy a lot of space on the dance floor. In America, it's cool to be subtle and stay in one place on the dance floor. I can't dance as my friends can attest but I know enough not to look like a fool. Be subtle and stay in one place. The less movement the better. Don't be Michael Jackson in the club and bump into people.
10. Get a haircut. Shah Rukh Khan and other Bollywood actors have bad hair according to American standards. Don't try to look like them. They still incorporate hairstyles from the 80's in which big feathered hair is cool. Keep your hair short and trim. You don't have to part it to the side every time. Get some pomade and spike it up a bit
11. Don't ask about GMAT, MCAT, SAT or test scores from strangers. It's rude to inquire how one performed on these exams. Never ask what grade someone else received.
12. Be subtle when trying to impress women. If you talk to a girl, be friendly and talk for a little while and then walk away after 15 minutes. You can always talk to her again later in the evening and you won't look like a stalker in the process. Don't use cheesy pickup lines or call them darling or beautiful. Pretend they are another guy in the room. How would you talk to that person. That's how you should approach women. Forget they are women and be yourself. They will like you more that way.
13. Clean your apartment. Get that hair out of the sink and shower. Wash your towels every once in a while. Keep a small towel by the sink so that you can wipe the basin after using it. Pick up your clothes off the floor. Throw away old food in the refrigerator. Keep some beer and wine in your refrigerator in case you have company aka women.
14. Don't stereotype American Desi's. They are more Indian than you think. They just have two sets of cultures so you can imagine that it can't be easy being Indian and American at the same time. But they are not as clueless about Indian culture as you might think. And deep down they do care about you but they are not going to relate to you as someone from India would. That doesn't make them any less Indian.
15. Use Listerine. Since we eat spicy food regularly, it's important to rinse off with powerful Listerene. It will wipe that raw onion smell away. Yes, I eat raw onions too and love them.
16. Dating: If you like a girl, ask her out. Don't try to be her best friend and then hope she will take your relationship to the next level. That only works in Hindi films. If you like a girl, ask her out like a man. Pick a restaurant that you like or would like to try. Approach her and say: "I have been wanting to try " ", would you like to go with me this Friday. If she says "yes" then simply say, I will pick you up at 8 PM if that works for you. Mentally prepare yourself for rejection in advance. There is no need to get nervous. Lots of guys get rejected. It's part of the process until someone says yes. Take charge on the date. Women like it when the guy has an idea what he wants to do. Order the bottle of wine at the restaurant (but let her order what she wants to eat). Don't pick too fancy of a place. Pick some place that is in between like a lounge with good music but that's fun. Don't try to make out with her on the first date. Walk her to her place or car and give her a hug. That's it. Trust me, you will get what you want on your second and third date.
