Revealing that I have Asperger's to my Autism Research Lab? Good or bad idea?

[whereisit96]

Every struggle I've had in my life can be traced back to Asperger's. It is by far the most important part of my identity. I don't have an official diagnosis as I am a broke college student, as many of us are. However, I have been active member of the Asperger's online community for a couple of years and I'm 99% sure I have it based on the diagnostic criteria we use and the behaviors I study.

I can't decide whether or not to reveal this to other members of my lab or to use it on graduate school applications. On one hand, having Asperger's has given me incredible insight into the social and cognitive struggles associated with ASD. Most of my proposed research ideas have been based off of my own struggles. I was interested in Autism before I knew I was an Aspie; however, it was still because I strongly related to individuals with ASD. I just didn't have the courage to really identify with the disorder.

On the other hand, Asperger's has made me well, Aspie. I'm uncoordinated and somewhat eccentric, and I do struggle with social interaction and overstimulation. These traits would certainly be detrimental to the tasks and duties of a psychologist. I plan to apply to either clinical psychology or developmental psychology programs. Still undecided. I really want this career so what I can make a meaningful difference in the world of Asperger's and write books on my own experiences and those of others. So eventually I do want to reveal my diagnosis, but since I don't technically have one yet I don't feel like I have to.

I just don't know. Part of me thinks this would make me a more attractive candidate due to the insight I have, but I also worry about the stigma. Or maybe it will have no effect. Just looking for some advice.

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[tiy123]

There's a good "kisses of death in grad school applications" paper that addresses this: https://psychology.unl.edu/psichi/Graduate_School_Application_Kisses_of_Death.pdf.
The short answer is no, do not mention it in your applications.

 

[whereisit96]

There's a good "kisses of death in grad school applications" paper that addresses this:
The short answer is no, do not mention it in your applications.

Oh wow, excellent advice. Thank you.

 

[SpartanWolverine]

I would expect this is already self-evident to your labmates, no? Not sure what you expect to gain by 'revealing' such a thing to them; might just make for an awkward interaction.

Even regardless of the great paper posted above I would not use a self-diagnosed untreated condition as the thesis of an application. It sounds like you have plenty of inspiration and otherwise legitimate interest in the field that you could focus on.

 

[whereisit96]

I would expect this is already self-evident to your labmates, no? Not sure what you expect to gain by 'revealing' such a thing to them; might just make for an awkward interaction.

Even regardless of the great paper posted above I would not use a self-diagnosed untreated condition as the thesis of an application.

Good point. Meh, I think my lab mates just think I'm kind of shy. I would only be telling my PI, but I definitely won't now.

 

[PsyDr]

I dunno. If I thought a diagnosis was the most important part of my identity I would probably actually, like you know, get diagnosed. Before I dedicated my leisure time and career.

 

[erg923]

Every struggle I've had in my life can be traced back to Asperger's. It is by far the most important part of my identity. I don't have an official diagnosis as I am a broke college student, as many of us are. However, I have been active member of the Asperger's online community for a couple of years and I'm 99% sure I have it based on the diagnostic criteria we use and the behaviors I study.

I can't decide whether or not to reveal this to other members of my lab or to use it on graduate school applications. On one hand, having Asperger's has given me incredible insight into the social and cognitive struggles associated with ASD. Most of my proposed research ideas have been based off of my own struggles. I was interested in Autism before I knew I was an Aspie; however, it was still because I strongly related to individuals with ASD. I just didn't have the courage to really identify with the disorder.

On the other hand, Asperger's has made me well, Aspie. I'm uncoordinated and somewhat eccentric, and I do struggle with social interaction and overstimulation. These traits would certainly be detrimental to the tasks and duties of a psychologist. I plan to apply to either clinical psychology or developmental psychology programs. Still undecided. I really want this career so what I can make a meaningful difference in the world of Asperger's and write books on my own experiences and those of others. So eventually I do want to reveal my diagnosis, but since I don't technically have one yet I don't feel like I have to.

I just don't know. Part of me thinks this would make me a more attractive candidate due to the insight I have, but I also worry about the stigma. Or maybe it will have no effect. Just looking for some advice.

Not sure I would worry about the stigma, per se.

Paint me old fashioned, but why is this anyone else's business if you can do your job?

If you cant because of it, than perhaps you should do something else?

 

[smalltownpsych]

Lots of different people with a wide variety of neurological makeups. No two people who might be diagnosed with Aspergers are really alike. Some definite commonalities, but I also see commonalities in other types of people. I used to work in sales, definitely different personalities than psychologists. I wouldn’t get too hung up on the label other than the positive benefit and support that can be derived from like-minded people. As far as self-disclosure goes do the “neurotypicals” (whatever that means) have to self disclose? I have never really thought of myself as being on the spectrum cause I got mad social skills, but I have always liked the more socially awkward types because we often had similar interests. Seriously, I can geek out with the best of ‘em. The more socially adept popular/jock/business types just bore me really. Good luck pursuing your career.

 

[futureapppsy2]

I agree with the posts here, but I also think there’s a bit of an ableist double standard in the field. People are encouraged to disclose if they are LGBTQ+ and interested in that population, if they are a member of the culture they are researching, etc, but with disability, either physical or psychological/cognitive, it becomes “yeah, hide that. Also, me-search,” even though me-search biases can definitely present with other identities.

 

[StellaB]

I agree with the posts here, but I also think there’s a bit of an ableist double standard in the field. People are encouraged to disclose if they are LGBTQ+ and interested in that population, if they are a member of the culture they are researching, etc, but with disability, either physical or psychological/cognitive, it becomes “yeah, hide that. Also, me-search,” even though me-search biases can definitely present with other identities.

This is SO true. And not just diagnostic stuff either - if someone admitted, for example, that they were interested in studying violence or trauma survivors because of their own experiences, the reaction of our field is wholly different than if they are part of a sanctioned diversity group (i.e. a group with protected status). Unfortunately there is a lot of stigma within psychology about having had certain experiences - even if you aren't drawn to the field because of those experiences. This stigma is magnified when the perosn identifies with those experiences, and unfortunately the stereotypes are true often enough to raise red flags. So unfortunately at the end of the day it's just much safer to keep that kind of information close to the vest. It also is none of anyone else's business, frankly. If that identification is the ONLY reason you can justify your interest, then maybe there is a bigger issue. But for most people, it probably isn't, so may as well just play up the other reasons and keep private things private.

 

[futureapppsy2]

I was thinking about this today because I was watching Steve Hayes' TED talk where he talks about having a severe panic disorder as an early career professor and how that, combined with his love of radical behaviorism, led him to develop ACT. It seemed very similar to Marsha Linehan talking about her experiences with probable BPD (or, at very least, profoundly severe depression and multiple suicide attempts) led her to develop DBT. It's super interesting to me because Hayes and Linehan are arguably two of the most well-respected, prominent clinical psychologists living today, and both of them, once they were so powerful in the field that nothing could hurt them, admitted to having had significant mental illnesses that drove the development of, basically, the cornerstones of third-wave behavioral therapy. Food for thought.

 

[erg923]

I think everyone maybe over thinking all of this, frankly.

I can understand the stigma to a degree, as we are working with a vulnerable population and need to be able to be attuned to emotional ways of being and speaking. And we need to be emotionally stable and healthy to do this grueling work to full capacity. If this interferes with your work, as it very well could, this could be a legitimate problem. That's why its a "disorder" after-all, right? But if it doesn't, it is no one else's business, and there is no need to overshare your personal business or medical conditions within your professional life.

 

[futureapppsy2]

I think everyone maybe over thinking all of this, frankly.

I can understand the stigma to a degree, as we are working with a vulnerable population and need to be able to be attuned to emotional ways of being and speaking. And we need to be emotionally stable and healthy to do this grueling work to full capacity. If this interferes with your work, as it very well, could, this could a legitimate problem. That's why its a "disorder." But if it doesn't, it is no one else's business, and there is no need to overshare your personal business or medical conditions within your professional life.

This recent TEPP article looked at disability disclosure advice among disabled psychology trainees and psychologists, and found two distinct patterns: trainees with visible disabilities suggested disclosure in order to control the conversation and ally concerns while trainees with invisible disabilities (LDs, psych disorders, chronic health conditions, etc) advocated for not disclosing in order to avoid stigma:
Lund, E. M., Andrews, E. E., & Holt, J. M. (2016). A qualitative analysis of advice from and for trainees with disabilities in professional psychology. Training and Education in Professional Psychology, 10(4), 206-213.

 

[PsychPsyance]

Take this for what it's worth. I had an RA who also was on the spectrum. He did an excellent job in my lab, but it was obvious to everyone in the lab (and this isn't a spectrum lab). There was no need for him to speak with anyone about it. He did speak with me about it, and I feel this worked to his advantage. I told him, similar to advice here, not to disclose it in applications, but instead to talk about his research interests and achievements. I, also, did not disclose this in letters. However, I did contact each PI he was applying to work with to describe both the student and his interpersonal style (with the student's permission, of course). I should note he was not on a clinical path.

 

[whereisit96]

I was thinking about this today because I was watching Steve Hayes' TED talk where he talks about having a severe panic disorder as an early career professor and how that, combined with his love of radical behaviorism, led him to develop ACT. It seemed very similar to Marsha Linehan talking about her experiences with probable BPD (or, at very least, profoundly severe depression and multiple suicide attempts) led her to develop DBT. It's super interesting to me because Hayes and Linehan are arguably two of the most well-respected, prominent clinical psychologists living today, and both of them, once they were so powerful in the field that nothing could hurt them, admitted to having had significant mental illnesses that drove the development of, basically, the cornerstones of third-wave behavioral therapy. Food for thought.

Literally this will be me if I'm accepted to and complete a PhD program. Only with Autism.

 

[futureapppsy2]

Literally this will be me if I'm accepted to and complete a PhD program. Only with Autism.

That’s an incredibly high bar.

 

[whereisit96]

That’s an incredibly high bar.

What do you mean?

 

[futureapppsy2]

What do you mean?

Linehan and Hayes are absolute luminaries in the field. Linehan took a disorder we considered pretty much untreatable and made it highly treatable.

 

[whereisit96]

Linehan and Hayes are absolute luminaries in the field. Linehan turned a disorder we considered pretty much untreatable and made it highly treatable.

Oh yeah I don't know if I'll ever achieve that caliber of success, I just meant that if I do become a practitioner I would probably eventually admit to my own struggles with ASD.

 

[procrastin8r]

I would definitely not disclose in app materials, because there is only so much information you can convey to the admission committee, and it's most efficient for that information to focus as much as possible on your strengths. Are you applying for clinical or counseling psychology programs? If so, when the admission committee finds out you have ASD, they may question how your ASD may affect your ability to do clinical work. This doesn't mean that you would not make an excellent clinician, and this doesn't mean that they will be discriminatory against you. I am just suggesting that it's safe to anticipate that this question will pop in their mind. If so, then some portion of your personal statement, and likely some portion of your PI's LOC, would focus on reassuring them that your interpersonal skills are not a concern. This would be unfortunate, because that paragraph could be spent expounding on some of your strengths in more detail, instead of trying to prove that you don't have a weakness.